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We broke up because...
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I was CRAY CRAY for her... She had me committed.0
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...0
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Communication problems - She grew tired of me communicating only via emojis...0
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He broke up with me using the emoji with a middle finger sticking straight up!0
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Them feet reek ..peeewww0
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She wore my shoes and now they're ruined!0
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I stretched out her shoes. I'm only 5'3" so I could wear her hose
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She thought a below job was working as a leaf blower1
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He blew his top more often than I could stand for0
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she had a fetish for velvet paintings and bootleg Elvis CDs0
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He wouldn't wear the Blue Suede shoes I bought him0
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She slept with the pool boy and I could not get the smell of chlorine out of the mattress0
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He wouldn't wear the Speedos I bought him0
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She didn't like me wearing speedos1
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Eww he wore speedos lol0
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She stole my speedos for her to wear.0
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He looked better in my Speedos than I did0
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He was always looking over his shoulder... He must have been in witness protection.0
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He always wore those dark shades and couldn't see anything in the dark!0
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He would stampede me, and broke several bones.0
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She couldn't grab the ole' bull by the horns...SwedishSarah wrote: »He would stampede me, and broke several bones.
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She insisted on wearing bull horns to bed0
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He was always trying to ignore my Viking roots0
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She couldn't handle a REAL viking0
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He rooted for the Vikings, I rooted for the Broncos
It became war in our home during the playoffs!0 -
She rooted for sub-par teams, instead of the Panthers! Then when I pranced around nekked for some sexy time, she was too into the Playoffs!0
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he was too invested in sports.
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I found out he was suspected of dropping his ex into a bottomless pit0
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I was drowning in a bottomless pit of work and I suspected she couldn't wait!
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She was just too fabulous for me.
I bet you haven't heard that one before. 0
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