Pissing me off
Replies
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Success is not a zero sum game. Another persons success won't take any of your success from you.
Also, because she is now in the habit of weighing herself, that could be causing her to be more mindful about what she eats. Even though she isn't on a specific plan, the weigh ins are almost certainly affecting her eating habits. If weight loss were the effortless thing she did naturally, she wouldn't be overweight, but she is. She is doing something different if she realizes it or not.
Try to just be happy for her. You'll feel better being happy for her. I'm happy for you both. It feels great!
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ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.9 -
OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?0 -
ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
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OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.9 -
ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Sure, it could be that. Or, it could be that I've been successfully doing this for a very long time now, and realize what it takes to not only lose the extra weight but to then follow through and maintain the weight loss, and I see the pitfalls that the op has set before herself. She admits that she's ready to give up, based on what someone else is doing. There's no long term commitment there, there's no long term focus. These two things are musts if one has any hope of being a part of the very small group of people who successfully do this whole thing for the long term.
The op needs to get real with herself and realize that this is a lifelong process, one that doesn't involve anyone else but herself. She cannot succeed if she continues to let others influence her weight management plan.
OP-I've been a daily weigher for around 5 years now. In that time I have never shared that moment with anyone else, including my husband. My weigh-ins are deeply personal-a time of reflection and a time where I get very honest with myself. Use your weigh-ins to help keep you focused. Get rid of the distractions-this is about you, not what anyone else around you is or is not doing.20 -
So I've been good at weighing myself once a week and whenever it's my time to hop on the scale and I see that I've actually lost a couple pounds my girlfriend jokingly decides to get on the weight too and she keeps losing weight too. However I have been eating super healthy and counting calories while she hasn't been trying to lose weight and eats SO unhealthy. It makes me question whether or not it's worth it and it honestly makes me sad that her weight is dropping when she's overweight too but isn't trying to lose weight
Im going through the same thing with my husband, he eats anything and everthing and is loseing weight and i eat salad and gain weight it just dont seem fair.He tries on clothes and they fit great i try on clothes and cant get them over my legs, sometimes i just go in my room and cry. Dont get discouraged it will happen for both of us, keep your head up and just rember you are a beautiful empowered women you got this3 -
ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".14 -
Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.
I'm just wondering why because I am a girl and said my girlfriend you automatically assumed I meant she's a friend... it's 2017 if I say girlfriend then she's a girlfriend3 -
Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.
I'm just wondering why because I am a girl and said my girlfriend you automatically assumed I meant she's a friend... it's 2017 if I say girlfriend then she's a girlfriend
None of us has any way to know one way or the other what the nature of your relationship is (people use 'girlfriend' in different ways). Anyway,, it doesn't really make much difference to the advice whether she's a friend or a partner. You still need to be losing weight for you, not someone else.
In fact it makes me more concerned. Your partner should be your friend and ally, and if she's succeeding at something, you should be happy for her, and she should be happy for you when you succeed.
My husband is 'naturally skinny', doesn't readily gain weight, and loses it easily when he wants to. I tend to run to fat and have to be much more disciplined over food than he does. That has always been the case and will always be the case. Is it 'fair'? I guess not. But that's just totally irrelevant to anything. I want to lose weight, so I work at it, and whatever he's eating or weighing or losing or gaining simply does not matter.13 -
WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.3 -
OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Sure, it could be that. Or, it could be that I've been successfully doing this for a very long time now, and realize what it takes to not only lose the extra weight but to then follow through and maintain the weight loss, and I see the pitfalls that the op has set before herself. She admits that she's ready to give up, based on what someone else is doing. There's no long term commitment there, there's no long term focus. These two things are musts if one has any hope of being a part of the very small group of people who successfully do this whole thing for the long term.
The op needs to get real with herself and realize that this is a lifelong process, one that doesn't involve anyone else but herself. She cannot succeed if she continues to let others influence her weight management plan.
OP-I've been a daily weigher for around 5 years now. In that time I have never shared that moment with anyone else, including my husband. My weigh-ins are deeply personal-a time of reflection and a time where I get very honest with myself. Use your weigh-ins to help keep you focused. Get rid of the distractions-this is about you, not what anyone else around you is or is not doing.
You're putting a lot of words in her mouth and assuming a lot of things that were not stated.
You might want to go back and try to comprehend the original post.5 -
ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
The irony is you accused someone of being judgemental when you judged the OP's girlfriend knowing nothing about her7 -
ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
The irony is you accused someone of being judgemental when you judged the OP's girlfriend knowing nothing about her
I did no such thing. I only used the information that was given by the OP.7 -
Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.
I'm just wondering why because I am a girl and said my girlfriend you automatically assumed I meant she's a friend... it's 2017 if I say girlfriend then she's a girlfriend
I'm just wondering why when you post a thread asking for opinions that you choose to single out the one poster who can trigger something for you, when in reality I imagine @kimny72 meant nothing by the reference of her as your friend. Grow up, if you want opinions, at least take the time to thank the people who were trying to help you instead of looking for trouble.
I was going to write a big long reply in things that helped me but now you have shown me that you don't value the help, you just want an excuse to *kitten*. It's 2017 maybe you should open your own damn eyes...
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ijsantos2005 wrote: »ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
The irony is you accused someone of being judgemental when you judged the OP's girlfriend knowing nothing about her
I did no such thing. I only used the information that was given by the OP.
Yes you certainly did. We have one side of the story. Then you judged the girlfriend would fail.
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ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
The irony is you accused someone of being judgemental when you judged the OP's girlfriend knowing nothing about her
I did no such thing. I only used the information that was given by the OP.
Yes you certainly did. We have one side of the story. Then you judged the girlfriend would fail.
This was my issue.
What's worse, OP is that you're in a loving relationship with this person. If anyone else is the world needs our support and love it's our partner.5 -
Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.
I'm just wondering why because I am a girl and said my girlfriend you automatically assumed I meant she's a friend... it's 2017 if I say girlfriend then she's a girlfriend
Oh, even better. After reading this thread, I was going to say that you seem like a bad, jealous friend but now you seem like a bad, jealous, unsupportive partner. I'd be mortified if my significant other posted something like this about me and secretly wanted me to fail if I didn't adopt a "clean" eating lifestyle or didn't seem to be putting as much of an effort into losing weight.
Since she's your girlfriend and you're both seeing success, maybe you should be banding together and supporting each other instead. We're only reading your side of the story so I wonder if your girlfriend is trying to show you that you don't have to be so restrictive and can still be successful. I'd imagine that dating someone who all of a sudden flips a switch to a healthier lifestyle can becoming daunting, especially if that person is trying to impose those same restrictions onto you, which many people tend to do to their partners when they make such a huge change.
In the end, this is conjecture on my part but the facts are as follows; you're upset because your significant other is also achieving weight loss even though she isn't following your exact methods or perceived to be putting in the same amount of effort as you. My only question to you is why?12 -
ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
You've jumped into this thread to white knight an OP who wrote a very frustrated yet somewhat shallow and not terribly supportive of her girlfriend message. You've suggested that anyone who isn't cheering the OP on up on her high horse is being judgmental.
That's irony.
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you can either spend your time getting jealous of someone else's progress but you still have to work on yourself. Save the energy for taking care of you. Perhaps your friend is working harder at it than you think. some people dont have a sweet tooth or cravings for unhealthy food. they naturally will be slimmer, you may as well get mad at them too. those people who are slim and can eat like a horse and not gain a pound.0
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It's the same in our house. I'm actively dieting, I want to lose another 13lb. My dh isnt dieting but he is eating the same main meal as me each night. He's been losing a bit of weight even though he eats more chocolate and crisps than me, I'm putting it down to the change in the types of foods that I'm buying and our healthier dinners.0
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Be your own person,this too shall pass.1
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Don't compare yourself to others it is you yourself and your goals that matter. Even if she eats junk food and lose weight why does it matter to you. Maybe the method she is using is working for her but it might not work for you. You have a plan and you are losing weight so stick with it.0
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have you been working out??? don't worry keep going soon you be look better and lose the weight you want. it take time. if you weight your self should weight the first thing in the morning when you wake up. i work out & diet for 2 months now but only lost 10 pounds but i looking great in the mirror.0
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Assuming you eat some of the same meals she's probably in a calorie deficit too, don't sweat it, be happy for her and maybe later on she'll adopt some of your eating habits spurred on by the success of just changing a few things. These things are a hell of a lot easier when your partner's on the same page as you it can be more discouraging if your partner is constantly trying to undermine your efforts or trying to sabotage your loss with guilt so you stop losing, don't be THAT partner. Embrace that you're losing weight together she's just having a different approach, you don't have to eat clean to lose weight you just have to eat less than you burn. x 1
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Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.Weigh yourself when you are alone and don't make a big deal about it. Problem solved.
Or if she is really your friend, tell her you'd rather not be comparing weights as its a sore spot for you. And if she really is your friend, be happy that she is having some seemingly easy success.
I'm just wondering why because I am a girl and said my girlfriend you automatically assumed I meant she's a friend... it's 2017 if I say girlfriend then she's a girlfriend
I'm just wondering why when you post a thread asking for opinions that you choose to single out the one poster who can trigger something for you, when in reality I imagine @kimny72 meant nothing by the reference of her as your friend. Grow up, if you want opinions, at least take the time to thank the people who were trying to help you instead of looking for trouble.
I was going to write a big long reply in things that helped me but now you have shown me that you don't value the help, you just want an excuse to *kitten*. It's 2017 maybe you should open your own damn eyes...
@skeeewur
I want to second this but with love and compassion. I'm not angry and I'm not annoyed with you mostly because I don't think anybody is really hurt by your behavior as much as you are. And you aren't doing it intentionally. But this is what you are doing. You are inextricably drawn to negative things and you barely notice positive things. That's a very unpleasant way to live.
You are actively and unconsciously creating a dark, unsafe version of the universe for yourself to live in. It doesn't have to be that way.
None of us sees reality as it is. We all see it through a lens. Your lens is terrible. It's almost certain that you needed your lens to be that way for a while, to survive. But you're not in that situation any more. You can change how you view people and situations. That is way more important than losing weight.10 -
And you know this how?ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
There are lots of people in the world who don't eat super "healthy" and have just fine lifespans.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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ijsantos2005 wrote: »
Someone that has goals and a plan are vastly more likely to succeed than someone that doesn't. There's nothing to argue here.
Unfortunately that's not true. My sister (older than me) at various times in her life has gotten a little overweight (10-20lb), which she notices when her waistband becomes too tight. When that happens she decides to cut down on her substantial bedtime snack until her waistband is no longer too tight. And that's it. Within a month or two she is back to normal and good for another five years or so. I don't think she owns a set of bathroom or kitchen scales and has never made a diet plan in her life. Some people are just naturally better at intuitive eating and they will never have to put more than a moment's thought into it.
On the other hand, most 'dieters' will fail and put back on all the weight they lose and more. Statistically speaking.
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ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
The irony is you accused someone of being judgemental when you judged the OP's girlfriend knowing nothing about her
I did no such thing. I only used the information that was given by the OP.
Yes you certainly did. We have one side of the story. Then you judged the girlfriend would fail.rainbowbow wrote: »ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
The irony is you accused someone of being judgemental when you judged the OP's girlfriend knowing nothing about her
I did no such thing. I only used the information that was given by the OP.
Yes you certainly did. We have one side of the story. Then you judged the girlfriend would fail.
This was my issue.
What's worse, OP is that you're in a loving relationship with this person. If anyone else is the world needs our support and love it's our partner.WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
You've jumped into this thread to white knight an OP who wrote a very frustrated yet somewhat shallow and not terribly supportive of her girlfriend message. You've suggested that anyone who isn't cheering the OP on up on her high horse is being judgmental.
That's irony.
And you know this how?ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
There are lots of people in the world who don't eat super "healthy" and have just fine lifespans.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
You all are really missing the point that I was trying to make, are putting words in my mouth, and making straw man arguments.
If we take the information that was given, one person has a goal to lose weight and the other does not. The person that has the goal and is counting calories will eventually lose the weight they want, the other one will not. That was all I was trying to say.3 -
ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »ruqayyahsmum wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »WinoGelato wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »OliveGirl128 wrote: »ijsantos2005 wrote: »You'll make it in the long run, she won't.
Going by the Op's post I wouldn't bet on it.
How do you figure that?
When someone is questioning if it's even worth continuing doing what they're doing, based off of what someone else is doing, that shows where their head is at. The op has given control of the situation to someone else, which means she's set herself up for failure. When one is so easily influenced by others it shows a lack of commitment to ones self, which is crucial for long term success.
Sounds like you're quick to judge and that you're not interested in giving advice to someone that's looking for help.
Ironic post here.
The OP is too fixated on others, is putting too much emphasis on "eating clean" (which has no direct bearing on weight loss" and is likely lacking perspective in understanding that different people lose weight at different rates based on their starting points.
These are all hallmarks of an unsustainable approach to the long term requirements of weight loss and maintaining a healthy weight.
Just to be clear, my advice OP is, "you do you" and "find an approach that is sustainable for the long term".
Please explain the irony. I'm a little slow.
The irony is you accused someone of being judgemental when you judged the OP's girlfriend knowing nothing about her
I did no such thing. I only used the information that was given by the OP.
Yes you certainly did. We have one side of the story. Then you judged the girlfriend would fail.
I was judging the outcome, not the person. There's a difference.0
This discussion has been closed.
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