WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR AUGUST 2017

Lisa – I’m like you, “I love me some Cajuns”, too! DH’s family were Cajuns. His granddaddy was 1st generation American (a child), so he spoke French and with a very distinctive Cajun accent; like pigeon was pronounce “P Zhan”. Louis said he could cuss like a sailor in French; they moved the entire family from Louisiana to help build the Dixie-Crystal plant in Port Wentworth (outside of Savannah) and he was the boiler keeper, as he had been in Louisiana). His co-workers taught him how to speak, read, and write in English before the move; but, at home he spoke French most of the time.

Sorry that your friend has had such a problem with her MnL, sadder still that the ‘son’ doesn’t do anything to help.

Allie – I also congratulate you on the condo. Now you have somewhere to move without having to move twice. I’m sure that you will figure out ‘how to make things work’. While you have not been paying a mortgage (but paying everything else) … those things you have been paying for will drop; some will no longer be an issue. What has your attorney said about getting Tom to keep a life insurance, naming you as the beneficiary to ‘fund’ alimony if he should die … since he has been ‘ordered’ to pay you a certain amount weekly? I know it is done in cases dealing with child support (to fund it so the custodial parent won’t lose that income). They were always made to show that it was still ‘in full force and effect’. I agree, don’t let Tom’s issues become yours! You need to remember, that is part of the split. He ‘owes’ you (at least your income for the past 20 years). Making him sell everything and then giving you an ‘equitable’ amount out of the proceeds should not be ‘out of the realm’. If he keeps the house, he owes you at least ½ of its value. Same of the FL home. He wants to keep them, he can pay what your ½ interest is on both. Same for his retirement. Same equitable division of the furniture in the house.

What you bought, or picked out, regardless of the other things are yours. Even if you leave them in the house with TomCat ... if they are not specifically written into the settlement agreement ... they become his. So make sure you get everything you want 'out of the house' prior to them (or your move).

I got a wicker stand at a garage sale; and it is on the porch. Got a piece of glass cut for the top with rounded edges. Got those (clear) circles so it won’t move or slide.

Becca – Y’all did a beautiful job. What did you use? I’m thinking maybe paint pens to get the circles. Most of mine are dried out or missing. I’ll have to look out in my studio to see if I can find them (again). We went to a donut shop in Vidalia, LA and one was sitting on the ledge at the end of the window. It was a big one; but, it wasn’t at all pretty, so I left it there. I will continue melting crayons over mine; but, I also want to put patterns on them. Tami and Mallory liked the ones I brought them. Will did his, “Mmmhmmph”; but, they can use them for paperweights. I put their names on each.

Terry in VT – I not only ‘look like Darth Vadar; but, sound like him if I try to talk’. If I had a black robe and put a black cloth napkin or table cloth over my head, I would BE Darth Vadar. But, I sleep like a rock and use it every night and during the day if I take a nap! I scared my DDnL#2 last year after I fell asleep in the recliner and did not breathe for a minute. She was about to go get Louis ... she thought I had died.

I’d like to find some like these you posted.

Lanette – When we get home, Louis is going to go get a 5-gallon bucket of pears for me to cook them down. I usually throw in a handful of pecan chips; since I don’t like raisins, I might throw in a handful of craisins (dried cranberries). I also use the juice of one lemon and the cut up pieces of that one, and sugar, of course. Last year, they were like pear conserves (or candied). This year, I will watch them better. I burnt up the first bath. Just have to go get small jars. I might even try another batch of pepper jelly (now that I know what I did wrong the last time). I did not use any water … so they turned out way too thick; more like a butter/spread. Still good; but, we usually forget to pull them out when we have some cream cheese and bagels.

Michele – Our County went by and chopped off the limbs to trees on both sides of the right-of-way, even ‘if’ the wires did NOT run down that side of the road. One guy that lived a few houses down was so pissed because they mutilated the line of cedar trees he had along the front of the property. Our pines are plants off the property line with a 15’ firebreak between them and the dirt road. No warning of what they were going to do; but, they did not touch our trees.

Mary – Hope everything goes well with your sale of the condo.

Beautiful sunset scene … makes you only think you are looking at a city on a river.

DDnL#1called DDnL#2 to congratulate her on being pregnant. She was ‘surprised’; but told me about it. It was a nice conversation; but, she made some stupid comment about this baby being a real part of the family. She just doesn’t know how to control her mouth’! I told Tami that Mallory was just as much our granddaughter as the other 3 and she ‘thanked me’ for saying that. I meant it, it is true. Will would have been ‘livid’ … he already has nothing to do with her after the way she treated Tami about Mallory’s birthday.

I hate that, because she has put a wedge between the 2 brothers. Tami said that when they told her parents, her Dad was shocked but happy, saying there is always 'room on his lap' for babies'; but, said that her mother had little to say (still hasn’t). Her granddaughter is about 7 months along and she is more concerned about her at the moment. She lost her last baby about this far along; but, they had also been told the baby had a birth defect and would not have lived long when she was born. She lost it while at their house when everybody was there for some reason. I guess I would be worried about the granddaughter, too; but, I’d like to think I would still be excited about Tami finally getting pregnant, too. Tami’s attitude is, ‘well, at least you have been told’ (meaning her mother). I will offer to come out and do anything I can to help (but only if she wants me to). My DMnL came and helped me with the birth of my 2 – and was a great deal of help after my boys were born. She was a ‘nanny’ by profession. The 2nd birthday, we only lived 25 miles from my mother; but, I knew that she would not care … she isn’t much into babies. But, when I lost my first baby due to a uncommon pregnancy; I did want MY Mama. They were off traveling (like all 3 times); but, they came home because they thought I might die.

I told Will that he needed to call Trey and tell him about Tami, because there was no doubt that at some point Louis would slip up; and, then he needed to tell Jenn that they do NOT want it posted on FB. Apparently, she hasn’t and Tami told her ‘not to’. I think Tami is going to open a separate account for Mallory since they will be getting all notifications about school activities by FB. She had said that she checks it every few days to make sure she doesn’t miss anything.

Joyce – Sorry your Mom is in the hospital. Hope she gets much better very quickly. At least they seem to be treating it aggressively. Sometimes when if affects a family member a call should be expected … not a FB message. When my DBnL had his stroke, we got called the next morning after she talked to the MD/Surgeons.

Allie – Will Tom really allow you to have ‘visitation rights with the dogs’? I doubt it if he gets or is in a relationship with someone else. Is there a way you could take one? I know you hate leaving both; but, maybe a dog for yourself will help ease the pain of having to leave them with TomCat. I'm in agreement with Lisa about TomCat coercing you into agreeing to a money situation over the dogs.

Yep, TomCat (and his attorney) are dopes. She should be forceful when dealing with him and letting him ‘know’ what the Judge could do. Once a Motion to Compel is filed … YOU will have the upper hand. You’re correct, we will always be here to encourage you and voice our opinions or suggestions.

As for you brother – Do NOT jump from one frying pan into the fire. Your brother is an adult; and, he should ‘act’ like one. You cannot do anything for his addiction to alcohol. HE has to make that decision … helping him will only prevent that from happening. You should also look for a meeting for family of addicts … I know this helped 2 of my friends dealing with the same problem … either for themselves or for a family member. One went to AA and she hasn’t had anything to drink since her divorce and remarriage. She is married to a much more stable man this time (3rd time) and another got the courage to leave her husband because he was an alcoholic.

Katla – My Mother also said “kill them with kindness when someone is ugly to you’. Don’t stoop to their level. Mother had a lot of little sayings she taught us so that we knew how to deal with things that we’d be faced with from time-to-time.

Katie – Louis and I have a substantial savings; and, we will only touch it ‘if’ we need it to pay bills. We won’t touch it to just buy something. I purchased my 2 chairs (they were floor models) but we actually got 2 ‘new’ ones. We’ll need a new sofa; but, won’t get it until these are paid off. I’ve sat in every single sofa they have at the furniture company and only the 2 sofa beds were comfortable to me. I will have Louis do the same when we plan on buying a couch. Most of them were way too deep even with throw pillows; or they were too high and my feet dangled. But, I would want a pattern on it.

Michele – We had a neighbor who refused to take out any of his trees; but, thankfully the one we offered to pay ½ for was leaning towards their MBR. It had already been apparently struck by lightning because if had this deep gash on it all the way down and he did not do anything to fill the gash. It was a ‘huge’ pine tree; so each time we had a storm I was hoping it would just snap off; but, it survived the straight-line storm that went through the neighborhood in early January; our live oak tree in front of our MBR fell away from the house.

M in Oz – Our SS checks and my Retirement check are deposited electronically. My husband has our mortgage taken out electronically; also my insurance for ½ of what I am covered for; I have our insurances deducted electronically, including all his insurance, the other ½ of mine. I got VS to change my due date later in the month so it would fall after I get my Retirement check that I pay all my other statements from.

Maritill – Happy that your MRI did not show any cancer.

Dana – When we are planning on having a ‘controlled burn’ Louis and Trey take long sticks and try to knock down all the dead or dying limbs so they will also burn.
I like my double door refrigerator with the freezer on the bottom. We had a double French door refrigerator side-by-side and that go left at the house we sold. Will has a side-by-side … They do NOT make for a lot of storage area on either side. We both have freezers. His is a chest; mine is a stand-alone. There is a lot of room in it. I am not tall enough to reach into a chest freezer. Mine is also self-defrosting as the one in the refrigerator is. The ice maker is in the drawer and we have a smaller tray to hold extra ice (for Louis cooler).

My parents grew up during the Depression; Daddy as a young adult; Mother as a child. Mother was bad about leaving her gown on the floor and scattered her Bobbie Pins (which were rationed). Mimi told her once that ‘if’ she left her gown on the floor and scattered her Bobbie pins she would get embarrassed at school. One day she left them in a mess and Mimi walked to her school and announced to the entire class that she was there to pick up Mother to come home to pick up her gown and store her Bobbie pins in the music box. The kids laughed at it (although I am sure others had the same rules). She never did it again.

We have a quilt on our bed; and, I need too stich some places and that will require that I do it by hand. The other quilt on Will’s bed was a wedding present from a neighbor who apologize that it was the only thing she could afford to give me. She did the same thing for my sisters. It is the only gift that I remember exactly who gave it to me. I had taken it off once to wash and dry it and Louis used it to put between shutters to deliver to a job; and, I went out and saw it. I freaked out and did a bit of cursing and took it out from his truck. He was told, in no uncertain terms, that it was NOT a drop cloth.


Sharon – When DOS started having financial woes; we [actually I] started taking a “Tough Love” approach to things … Louis tends to be an enabler, much to the disdain of our youngest son who has never asked us to help him financially. When I got down to pay off his FASFA loan, I asked if he would pay the balance which was less than $2,500. He did and I pulled paying a portion of the tuition for Trey’s girls to go to private school which was the only thing to do. That helped us considerably. Now that Jenn has again changed jobs, they will definitely have more ‘spendable’ income that Louis and I have. It was only fair they take this bill from us.

Mary – Hope that all goes well for you and your husband to start a new life in Arizona; maybe his company will hire him for a ‘like’ position in Phoenix (if I remember that is where you are doing) and ‘if’ that is where the company also has a branch office.

Cathy – I love the ring with the green stone in it and the last picture of the gold necklace. Are these pieces that you made yourself? In fact, I like all of them. The first day of school is cute; your grandson is a doll. In a couple of years, he’ll be fighting the girls off him. Well, that usually begins about 5th or 6th grade.

Clowe1-29 – Beautiful pictures; except for the one of the blow-out on the vehicle. WOW, I’ve never seen a blowout do that much damage to a vehicle. I think the only time we’ve had a blow-out (and it really was not a blowout). We were pulling our boat to Jacksonville for Louis to take his Dad fishing. I was in the backseat nursing youngest son, oldest son up in the front … just strapped in; and all of a sudden Louis said, “HOLD ON, I don’t know what is about to happen, I just lost the wheel off the boat trailer. I turned around and saw it roll in front of both lanes of traffic behind up, hit the median and bounce a couple of time; then into the oncoming traffic in both lanes and across the Interstate on the other side. He pulled over, took a deep breath and crossed 4 lanes of heavy traffic to go pick up the wheel and bring it back over. The only thing we could figure is that the boat place did not tighten the lug nuts; so he space them out and we went on our way. He got new lug nuts first thing when we got there. Thankfully we did not ride very far and therefore did not ruin the rim. The only other time we saw something like that is when a deer jumped from one side of the Interstate to our side and over the fence. I think it took only 6 bounds to do that. Seemed to be airborne for 30 feet between each leap. It was a ‘sight’ to see. But, there again, Louis reminded me to ‘not swerve if a deer jumped out in front of you and not to slam on breaks if it meant you would probably go into a spin’. Not long ago, he had one jump in front of us and swerve a little; I turned to him and said, “I guess that was what you mean about NOT swerving.’ It scared him. He usually is very good about watching for them. It had turned dark. Usually they tend to cross roads in the early morning and late evening; and, most of the time they move ‘at night’.

Margaret – I’d like to get back into my painting and drawing. I just have not been ‘in the mood’ lately. The last painting I did was for my 4th granddaughter (actually my 3rd-Oldest granddaughter for her birthday. I hope she liked it – she wanted ‘pink’ sunflowers. I painted them, but, thought they looked too much like pink zinnias, so I put in a bit of gold ones and a little gold on the pink ones and a little pink on the gold ones.

While we won’t be going south to get home; I am a bit worried about chasing a storm or what we might find out that we had to go find detours. DDnL#2 doesn’t want us to leave Sunday if we are going to run into rain. We’ll see. Louis said something about leaving Saturday and I told him he had said Sunday. I want to spend as much time with the kids as possible. They are going to Jackson, MS on Tuesday for another MD appointment. They will do a sonogram to see if they can find the heartbeat. This is a normal procedure. Everything has looked very good. Praying they hear the heartbeat; but, Tami said she has felt great and the embryo they implanted looked good, the previous two were not as ‘good’ looking according to the MD. This time, they went in an scratched the inside of her uterus … she said that the nurse does not tell the patients what it involves because too much time and money has been spent by that point and most would not come back to have it done. She also said that Tami took it like a trooper; most women are screaming, crying, and cursing. After it was over she tried to get Will to talk to her. The nurse told her to ‘stop; he was praying’. Tami told us that last year when we were here and they said they had to ‘go pick up something’ … that was actually the day they took out the eggs. She said the 5 shots in the stomach to make her ovaries swell so they could go in when the time was right to pull out as many as they could, there were going to Jackson, MS to get bloodwork done. It’s been a very long and expensive process. She has deactivated her FB account because she did not want anyone to ‘tag’ her and post about it there as they haven’t told everyone they needed to, won’t tell some because they don’t believe it was a procedure they should have gone to. DDnL#1 called her yesterday to congratulate her, made some comment about Mallory and that this baby would actually be ‘blood-related’. When she told me that; I told Tami that Mallory IS one of our granddaughter … why the Hell would my DDnL#1 even say something like that. Louis said, ‘because she does not THINK before opening up her

Lenora

Can you tell me Becca or Lenora what kind of paints you are using? Acrylics? Do you spray them with a sealer? Let us know!
Thanks,
Dana

Hello ladies!
Okay! I have the treadmill all set up, and ready, and my healthy-strider ready to go, now if I can just get my butt up there! I've been walking, and hiking with my hubby, it's almost deer season, so I've been going with him looking for places to put a deer stand, and boy we must have climbed up three small mountains! We left at noon, got back to the truck at 4:50pm! I had no idea I had THAT in me!!!
I have a question about water. I like to drink this seltzer called Clear & Sparkling, it's made by Adirondack Beverages. It's ingredients are: carbonated water, citric acid, natural flavor, potassium benzoate (preservative), sucralose, acesulfame potassium. I also drink Poland Springs water but, do I put the Clear & Sparkling in with my water consumption? I drink a 33.8oz bottle a day, and beside water the only other thing I drink is herbal tea, and sometimes green tea, with nothing in it. I'm told the teas can go in my water consumption, because they have no calories, so I thought the clear & sparkling could too, as it has no calories, no sodium, and no sugar. Thanks!
Terry in Vt I tried making my own jump rings too...what a pain! I thought I had made enough, and only had 1/5 of what I needed. I will check out the site's you mentioned, I saw one called Lord of the rings, and they seem to have a very good selection.

Tiffanie in NH

Allie when it comes time for you to draw social security because you were married over ten years to Tom you are entitled to use his work record because his salary was higher than yours you more than likely will get more in social security. I am thinking about this right now in that I am trying to decide when is the best time for me to start taking it. You don't need to talk to him about this at all. I am just bringing this up because I know you have big changes happening in your life right now , and it is a positive you get from Tom with no hassle.

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Dear ladies,
Ooh I am so far behind!!! Let me admit, I am a rock finder, not a rock painter. I find them and rehide them! When we are able, maybe up at Whidbey island, I will buy painting pens. But right now, I am appreciating other talent. Just do not have funds to paint right now.

Today I paid bills, then tomorrow I shall go onto our banks online site and pay them. With what I have to work with, I can't do automatic payment right now. I pay online my cable, internet/phone, car payment, life insurance premium, and power bill. I still have to send checks to the manager for rent, my doctor visit copay if I go, my husbands mail order pharmacy, and a check to a relative for him helping us move up here. So after all is said and done it comes out to $113 a week to buy food, wash clothes at the laundromat, and entertain ourselves! Its doable but restaurants with waiters and such is a luxury!

Yesterday was husbands 57th birthday! He doesn't like a big show, but we diud walk around Seaside, and have pizza 2 piece lunch special, ( I gave home part of it), and I found a painted rock! He is easy to please. I made him bacon grease/ flour gravy, all peppery, to put over toast, and we watched old movies! Its sad to be watching TMC channel, and admit to seeing all they are playing. We are great fans of " Boston Blackie", and "The Thin Man" series movies! Of course the old Perry Mason, ( doesn't his secretary EVER go home???).

I have rec'd a total of 4 letters from my boot camp son!! He is block printing better, and has a lightness about how he is viewing everything. This week is Hell Week, so he is busy busy! He thinks they're withholding mail, because as much as we write, the rest if the family writes, as well as all my friends write, he should be flooded. This letter today, he didn't even mention about missing us! That's a good sign!

Well love ya
Becca
Oregon

I turned 50 on Sunday. I'm tired of the up and down of losing/gaining weight. I need someone to share my accountability. I eat fairly well and exercise almost daily. It would help me to give a daily accounting to someone. I try to input my eating everyday, but need an extra push. Anyone interested? Thanks.

Allie