Let it GO! Decluttering (simplifying) your life of (people, places or things) success stories?
Replies
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I am working towards a minimalistic lifestyle. My husband not so much. It’s not really that he buys excess but he doesn’t put things away. It stresses me out to look around the house and see “stuff” scattered all over the place
one time I spent my toddlers nap time going through all of his toys in the living room and removing about half of them to declutter and I’m not kidding a couple days later I come home from work and my husband had bought a giant inflatable shark and 3 or 4 new balls for him. I wanted to scream lol.
Areas in my life that I am working on are my wardrobe (I started doing a capsule wardrobe thing for each season) and beauty products/toiletry type stuff. I’m trying to go through everything in my linen closet so I can throw the damn containers away. I’ve honestly never been one to buy little decorative “things” or knick knacks so I don’t have any problem there. I’ve always considered those to be nothing more than extra stuff to dust around. But going forward before I make any purchase I’m going to try really hard to think about it. Is it worth the money and will this bring value to my life and/or my home?
Another area that stresses me out is my kitchen. I’ve gone through every drawer and cabinet and there’s nothing more that I want to get rid of. Everything brings value to my life. I love to cook. Except the deep fryer but my husband won’t let me get rid of that lol.
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »I grew up in a spotless house. My mom would stay up late cleaning many nights. I think it set an unrealistic expectation for me as an adult. My brain got wired to think it was the way you live .... with zero clutter.
When I got married, I saw that my spouse was messy and loves clutter; i think it makes him feel good. The clutter chokes me. It can be very hard on me emotionally to live in clutter. Our dresser in our bed room is cut in half- his side is covered in receipts, papers, and everything , and my side has a picture frame and a candle. I'm sorry to vent. He's not wrong for being that way, because that's how his brain is wired.
But for me, it's a source of discomfort seeing that junk in piles all over.
I just needed to express myself on this thread. I wont complain further, but i dream of having a clean house with only items we treasure instead of thousands of pieces of junk that isn't valued but still kept.
If it helps, you’re not alone. I’m not the neatest person but I don’t like clutter. My husband is a complete slob. I just typed out a really long reply on everything my husband does at home that drives me crazy and deleted it lol. It is funny because our bedroom is the same way. We each have a dresser and night stand. Mine are empty except for my one cup of water that I’m currently using and my phone. His is covered in receipts, pills, random pieces of paper, coins, 3 different cups, empty bottles of lotion, empty deodorant containers, a pile of clothes that are “too dirty to put back in the drawer but not dirty enough to wash” lol!! I try to leave it alone but every now and then I have to clean it off when it drives me crazy enough4 -
Glad I found this post.
I did a major garage purge back in January. 2 trips to the dump!
Then I purged 35lbs of extra weight from Jan to now. I feel like a new man again.
Now if I can convince my wife to purge her junk in the house I'd be in a really good place...lol12 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »I grew up in a spotless house. My mom would stay up late cleaning many nights. I think it set an unrealistic expectation for me as an adult. My brain got wired to think it was the way you live .... with zero clutter.
When I got married, I saw that my spouse was messy and loves clutter; i think it makes him feel good. The clutter chokes me. It can be very hard on me emotionally to live in clutter. Our dresser in our bed room is cut in half- his side is covered in receipts, papers, and everything , and my side has a picture frame and a candle. I'm sorry to vent. He's not wrong for being that way, because that's how his brain is wired.
But for me, it's a source of discomfort seeing that junk in piles all over.
I just needed to express myself on this thread. I wont complain further, but i dream of having a clean house with only items we treasure instead of thousands of pieces of junk that isn't valued but still kept.
If it helps, you’re not alone. I’m not the neatest person but I don’t like clutter. My husband is a complete slob. I just typed out a really long reply on everything my husband does at home that drives me crazy and deleted it lol. It is funny because our bedroom is the same way. We each have a dresser and night stand. Mine are empty except for my one cup of water that I’m currently using and my phone. His is covered in receipts, pills, random pieces of paper, coins, 3 different cups, empty bottles of lotion, empty deodorant containers, a pile of clothes that are “too dirty to put back in the drawer but not dirty enough to wash” lol!! I try to leave it alone but every now and then I have to clean it off when it drives me crazy enough
Oh man I can also relate to the above! My husband is a super minimalist thank goodness, so he doesn't have a ton of possessions in general. But what he does have is a mess. He cooks our meals and makes the biggest mess of the kitchen (I'm ok with it because I clean up after dinner daily & it satisfies me to see the kitchen looking pristine again). His side of our dresser is a pile of receipts and headphones and change. We got this little tray for him to put it all on, but it's overflowing all of the time and piled up 8 inches high. My side has a large jewelry box, deodorant & 2 bottles of perfume. On the floor next to the bed he just piles up all of his shorts, various running shoes, sandals, even jeans or khaki pants are over there in a jumble. My clothes are neatly hanging or folded, and organized by color & type. Amazingly though he always looks presentable in public! He works from home and usually on the sofa so I got him a couple of really nice large decorative boxes to put his junk in and fortunately I'm able to just close the lids and/or stow them under the coffee table (they look like part of the décor) when we're having company.
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Reading some of these posts, I'm glad my husband and I have our own rooms!
(It's worked for 25 years.)
My room stays tidy, and I let him do what he wants with his stuff in his room. The rest of the house is pretty much organised now.
I've learned to "Let it go" of the resentment towards his mess in his own space.
Perhaps if others see their partners' mess as rather their partner's space, it might not hurt their feelings so much. Just a thought.
I do do some things to help him manage his clutter, like his laundry. He manages the meal planning and cooking, so division of labour is fair.
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I have seen this brilliant idea: Hang all your clothing on coat hangers in your cupboard(s) facing one side only. If you take out some garment, change the clothing hanger to the other side. Do this for 6 months or so. Whatever you haven't used in that time, will still hang "the wrong way" around.8
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I LOVE THIS POST! Very inspiring, OP - gave me some motivation and helped me remember where I've come from!
Two, almost three years ago now, I had a shift. I cut out drinking year one. I cut out smoking year two, and this year I've cut out relationships that no longer serve me. In that time I've also managed to let go of a lot of stuff - clothes, shoes, trinkets, school supplies, etc. And also, habits - no more going out every weekend, or having to see every concert that strikes my fancy. No more wanting for the weekend and wasting the week. I planted my roots firmly with my family and started cultivating a better relationship with myself first, and then with my partner. I realized that stuff does not fill me up - it just fills up my house. I can't pour from an empty cup so I had to find out what actually did fill me. It was fresh air. It was heart to heart talks with my partner. It was waking up early and earning overtime to save for a house. It was playing with my dog till we were both dog tired. I tripped - I stumbled - I got back up and I'm back at it! Do I have plenty more stuff I could still do without? Sure do! Will I continue to press on in the directions of my dreams? Sure will!
This is an inspiring post! Xo1 -
Y'all have inspired me to tackle my home! It drives me crazy that I can't properly close one of my kitchen drawers. It's the one that holds the big ladles, knives, pizza cutter, etc. I'm convinced that there are things I can declutter. Looking forward to getting home and exploring it!
One of my random thoughts-- I feel rested when I go on vacation and stay in a hotel room. But why? Maybe it's because that room doesn't have the clutter that I have at home. The hotel room has just the necessary basics.
Oh. What so what do I do with all the half empty bottles of shampoo hanging around my bathroom?5 -
WandaVaughn wrote: »Y'all have inspired me to tackle my home! It drives me crazy that I can't properly close one of my kitchen drawers. It's the one that holds the big ladles, knives, pizza cutter, etc. I'm convinced that there are things I can declutter. Looking forward to getting home and exploring it!
One of my random thoughts-- I feel rested when I go on vacation and stay in a hotel room. But why? Maybe it's because that room doesn't have the clutter that I have at home. The hotel room has just the necessary basics.
Oh. What so I do with all the half empty bottles of shampoo hanging around my bathroom?
The shampoo/conditioner thing really bugs me, too. Once it gets to the point where I can't stand it anymore I'll just combine them into one bottle. I've also moved them into the laundry room and I use a squirt or two in delicate wash cycles instead of more harsh laundry detergent.5 -
Pacing around, waiting for test results, throwing out random things. Time to clean a dresser!5
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »I LOVE THIS POST! Very inspiring, OP - gave me some motivation and helped me remember where I've come from!
Two, almost three years ago now, I had a shift. I cut out drinking year one. I cut out smoking year two, and this year I've cut out relationships that no longer serve me. In that time I've also managed to let go of a lot of stuff - clothes, shoes, trinkets, school supplies, etc. And also, habits - no more going out every weekend, or having to see every concert that strikes my fancy. No more wanting for the weekend and wasting the week. I planted my roots firmly with my family and started cultivating a better relationship with myself first, and then with my partner. I realized that stuff does not fill me up - it just fills up my house. I can't pour from an empty cup so I had to find out what actually did fill me. It was fresh air. It was heart to heart talks with my partner. It was waking up early and earning overtime to save for a house. It was playing with my dog till we were both dog tired. I tripped - I stumbled - I got back up and I'm back at it! Do I have plenty more stuff I could still do without? Sure do! Will I continue to press on in the directions of my dreams? Sure will!
This is an inspiring post! Xo
Yay! @JulieAL1969 - It inspires me to inspire others!!! Thanks so much for the feedback 3 -
One of my random thoughts-- I feel rested when I go on vacation and stay in a hotel room. But why? Maybe it's because that room doesn't have the clutter that I have at home. The hotel room has just the necessary basics.
And people clean for you!8 -
Following1
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NewLIFEstyle4ME wrote: »NicoleVT83 wrote: »I really enjoyed reading this! Thanks
My pleasure and I'm so GLAD you enjoyed the post. Thank you so much for taking the time to reply.
{{{
HUGS }}}
Agreed beautiful post and replies.1 -
First, thank you all for keeping this post in the first page, just seeing the title daily gives me the gentle nudge so I stay focused.
Today I took all the t-shirts, sweaters and knits out of my closet, and only put the ones I wanted to keep back in. I now have a full hamper of old clothes that I have to bag up and take to recycling, but I wanted to share some thoughts I had while going through the pile:
- the ones I really liked immediately made me dance a little, smile, or plan outfits around them in my head
- I’m 26 now, and the biggest garments were bought most recently, so the things that fit better now are mostly bought when I was a few years younger, and people’s styles change a lot. I hadn’t really realized that losing weight would take me on a flashback to when I was 23-24. It’s not that long ago, but people change a lot during college*.
*I live in Finland, and the traditional timeline for college studies is slightly different. The average age for starting college has been 22 for a while, most programs are recommended to be completed in 5 years (almost all programs are bachelor+master), and at least in the field of law, which I study, the actual average time it takes to graduate has been 6,5 years. I expect to graduate when I’m 27, and that’s in no way unusual.12 -
Reading some of these posts, I'm glad my husband and I have our own rooms! (It's worked for 25 years.)
My room stays tidy, and I let him do what he wants with his stuff in his room. The rest of the house is pretty much organised now.
I've learned to "Let it go" of the resentment towards his mess in his own space.
Perhaps if others see their partners' mess as rather their partner's space, it might not hurt their feelings so much. Just a thought.
I do do some things to help him manage his clutter, like his laundry. He manages the meal planning and cooking, so division of labour is fair.
I'm somewhat of a lying hound ... some more of Mr O's work stuff was in a very messy jumble in a corner of the kitchen.
Yesterday, it came to me in a flash that it just needed putting in a basket... so I went straight out and walked to the shops and bought one exactly the same as one we already have in the kitchen.
I put his stuff in some sort of order in the basket, and when he got home and saw it, he thanked me, said it was great, and gave me a kiss. Yay!
Amazing what one basket can do!
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The best thing I've ever done for myself:
Getting rid of the toxic people in my life. This included a lot of my family.
After that, 90% of my stress went away and I could focus on me. End result: lost 180lbs, enrolled back in school to finish my psych degree, off my anxiety and depression meds, overall happiness increased 1000X's.40 -
@VUA21 What a great story! So happy for you. Yes, letting toxic people go can give us so much freedom. Yours is definitely a true success story.
@Orphia Thank you. It was a New Year's resolution. My 2015 resolution was to "Quit caring so much", particular of everyone and everything but myself. There were a lot of tears at the beginning, a lot of hate towards me (as I was no longer everyone's bailout and scapegoat), but in the end I am so much better without them.9 -
I've just been reading about “dostadning” - "Swedish Death Cleaning":
https://www.domain.com.au/living/swedish-death-cleaning-how-to-declutter-your-home-and-life-20180205-h0snyu/Now, the new buzzword on the block is “dostadning” – a hybrid of the Swedish words “death” and “cleaning”. How much these fad words are actually a part of Scandinavian culture is debatable, but dostadning is the new phenomenon outlined in Margareta Magnusson’s The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning. In Europe, the book has already occupied a good deal of reviewing space and according to Time magazine, dostadning will be the hot new trend stateside in 2018.
Magnusson’s book chimes with the current anxiety about clutter in the 21st century. Dostadning advocates the proactive and mindful clearing out of possessions before death. The idea is that it saves relatives the onerous task of making decisions about what to keep and what to throw or give away. The book reflects the simple fact that we are all living longer lives. This results, of course, in more stuff.3 -
I've just been reading about “dostadning” - "Swedish Death Cleaning":
https://www.domain.com.au/living/swedish-death-cleaning-how-to-declutter-your-home-and-life-20180205-h0snyu/Now, the new buzzword on the block is “dostadning” – a hybrid of the Swedish words “death” and “cleaning”. How much these fad words are actually a part of Scandinavian culture is debatable, but dostadning is the new phenomenon outlined in Margareta Magnusson’s The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning. In Europe, the book has already occupied a good deal of reviewing space and according to Time magazine, dostadning will be the hot new trend stateside in 2018.
Magnusson’s book chimes with the current anxiety about clutter in the 21st century. Dostadning advocates the proactive and mindful clearing out of possessions before death. The idea is that it saves relatives the onerous task of making decisions about what to keep and what to throw or give away. The book reflects the simple fact that we are all living longer lives. This results, of course, in more stuff.
It's an interesting concept. I actually started my declutting in part because of the death of a close friend (she was only 32). It made me think about what I was leaving behind and what my family would have to sort through. By doing it for them, I'm letting them know what is/was important to me.
I really wish I could interest my parents to the concept. They're both retiered and have a house full of 'stuff'. My brothers and I count 2-3months to clean/declutter/donate/sell when my parents die so we can get the house ready for sale. That 2-3 months is with all 3 of us implicated full time. It sometimes makes me sad to know that this huge house filled with stuff that they cherish (or which includes things they cherish) is simply going to be dissected and discarded without their say. By doing a 'death cleaning' they would get to have their say and relieve us of a huge load.7 -
WandaVaughn wrote: »Y'all have inspired me to tackle my home! It drives me crazy that I can't properly close one of my kitchen drawers. It's the one that holds the big ladles, knives, pizza cutter, etc. I'm convinced that there are things I can declutter. Looking forward to getting home and exploring it!
One of my random thoughts-- I feel rested when I go on vacation and stay in a hotel room. But why? Maybe it's because that room doesn't have the clutter that I have at home. The hotel room has just the necessary basics.
Oh. What so what do I do with all the half empty bottles of shampoo hanging around my bathroom?
@WandaVaughn I use those up to shave my legs instead of buying shaving cream
They work just as well and I know that I don't react badly to the ingredients. It's often just that I grow tiered of the smell (if only they would sell smaller bottles at decent prizes!)
Conditioner is also a good one to use. It tends to make my legs nice and soft to boot.
I simply figured that if it was good enough to put on my head and risk having it run into my eyes, then there's no reason why I can't lather up my legs with it to shave them 10 -
ladyreva78 wrote: »WandaVaughn wrote: »Y'all have inspired me to tackle my home! It drives me crazy that I can't properly close one of my kitchen drawers. It's the one that holds the big ladles, knives, pizza cutter, etc. I'm convinced that there are things I can declutter. Looking forward to getting home and exploring it!
One of my random thoughts-- I feel rested when I go on vacation and stay in a hotel room. But why? Maybe it's because that room doesn't have the clutter that I have at home. The hotel room has just the necessary basics.
Oh. What so what do I do with all the half empty bottles of shampoo hanging around my bathroom?
@WandaVaughn I use those up to shave my legs instead of buying shaving cream They work just as well and I know that I don't react badly to the ingredients. It's often just that I grow tiered of the smell (if only they would sell smaller bottles at decent prizes!)
Conditioner is also a good one to use. It tends to make my legs nice and soft to boot.
I simply figured that if it was good enough to put on my head and risk having it run into my eyes, then there's no reason why I can't lather up my legs with it to shave them
I sometimes use conditioner when I’m out of shave gel but I never would have thought to use shampoo. My linen closet is full of half empty bottles of random stuff. I am trying hard to use it all up so I can get rid of them all4 -
ladyreva78 wrote: »WandaVaughn wrote: »Y'all have inspired me to tackle my home! It drives me crazy that I can't properly close one of my kitchen drawers. It's the one that holds the big ladles, knives, pizza cutter, etc. I'm convinced that there are things I can declutter. Looking forward to getting home and exploring it!
One of my random thoughts-- I feel rested when I go on vacation and stay in a hotel room. But why? Maybe it's because that room doesn't have the clutter that I have at home. The hotel room has just the necessary basics.
Oh. What so what do I do with all the half empty bottles of shampoo hanging around my bathroom?
@WandaVaughn I use those up to shave my legs instead of buying shaving cream They work just as well and I know that I don't react badly to the ingredients. It's often just that I grow tiered of the smell (if only they would sell smaller bottles at decent prizes!)
Conditioner is also a good one to use. It tends to make my legs nice and soft to boot.
I simply figured that if it was good enough to put on my head and risk having it run into my eyes, then there's no reason why I can't lather up my legs with it to shave them
I sometimes use conditioner when I’m out of shave gel but I never would have thought to use shampoo. My linen closet is full of half empty bottles of random stuff. I am trying hard to use it all up so I can get rid of them all
I haven't bought shaving cream once these past 2 years and haven't had any problems with the skin (no rashes, irritations or other).4 -
I love this thread.
I have been horribly off track with my eating for a while and at the same time have been shopping somewhat out of control. I'm getting a handle on the shopping and have started a full out assault on clutter in my life. I hope getting my eating back on track will follow.5 -
I've just been reading about “dostadning” - "Swedish Death Cleaning":
https://www.domain.com.au/living/swedish-death-cleaning-how-to-declutter-your-home-and-life-20180205-h0snyu/Now, the new buzzword on the block is “dostadning” – a hybrid of the Swedish words “death” and “cleaning”. How much these fad words are actually a part of Scandinavian culture is debatable, but dostadning is the new phenomenon outlined in Margareta Magnusson’s The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning. In Europe, the book has already occupied a good deal of reviewing space and according to Time magazine, dostadning will be the hot new trend stateside in 2018.
Magnusson’s book chimes with the current anxiety about clutter in the 21st century. Dostadning advocates the proactive and mindful clearing out of possessions before death. The idea is that it saves relatives the onerous task of making decisions about what to keep and what to throw or give away. The book reflects the simple fact that we are all living longer lives. This results, of course, in more stuff.
Just over two years ago, my husband and I had to downsize from a large 4 bedroom house to a 2 bedroom apartment. Although we had only been together for 11 years at the time, we had originally combined two households. As you can imagine, there were many duplicates - we had the space, so we just kept it all.
Suddenly I had to go through everything to pare it all down to a manageable size. That included many sentimental items that I had, some for over 35 years, carted from place to place. Some items were because I thought that my kids would want it so I should keep it for them. As I went through items, I put aside boxes for each of the kids which they went through when they came home for Christmas that year. I was surprised and rather chagrined to see how little they actually cared about.
Relevance to the above quote? As I went through everything in the final cull, the underlying consideration was: "When I die, will anyone care about/want this?" With few exceptions, the answer was an obvious 'NO'!
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I love this thread.
I have been horribly off track with my eating for a while and at the same time have been shopping somewhat out of control. I'm getting a handle on the shopping and have started a full out assault on clutter in my life. I hope getting my eating back on track will follow.
@cabwj Glad you found the thread!
Eating and spending have a lot in common.
We must stick to our calorie limit and not spend calories we haven't earned, like we must not spend money we haven't earned.
This line of thought helped me lose 80 lbs and reach goal, and stay there 2+ years.
At work, we don't spend calories in the tearoom if we can't afford them, like we don't go into debt shopping for groceries in the supermarket.
With possessions, we sometimes like to reward ourselves with a purchase, when we don't even have room for it.
Don't eat it or buy it if you don't have the calories or space for it.10 -
I have reading along, and I can't say for sure when my decluttering began. Last spring, my cat needed surgery right before I left for a trip to Europe (spent too much on the trip, but enjoyed every moment of it). When I came home, my dog needed the emergency vet clinic. While I was able to cover all of it, I found myself in August sometime wondering when everything got so out of control. My first goal was to get my finances under control. I still have a way to go, but I should be debt free (except the house) by the end of this year.
During the financial purging process, I decided to sell some stuff. As I was sorting through to see what could be sold, I realized that over the last 9 years (since I bought the house), I have progressively been filling it up. As part of that process, I bought more shelves (even custom designed and built some myself). I figured more shelves = better organized. At some point, I read "The joy of less: A minimalist living guide" by Francine Jay. Donated stuff, discarded stuff, sold stuff. As things were going out the door, I discovered a bunch of empty shelves. So, I have been selling those too. (Money goes on the debt, double duty!)
The last couple of days, I have been patching nail holes in the walls, and touch up painting those spots. I can't believe how good it feels to have the debt on a plan, and the house a bit better controlled. It's still a work in progress, but it feels good to see an end in sight. Next year, home renos!18 -
I love this thread.
I have been horribly off track with my eating for a while and at the same time have been shopping somewhat out of control. I'm getting a handle on the shopping and have started a full out assault on clutter in my life. I hope getting my eating back on track will follow.
@cabwj Glad you found the thread!
Eating and spending have a lot in common.
We must stick to our calorie limit and not spend calories we haven't earned, like we must not spend money we haven't earned.
This line of thought helped me lose 80 lbs and reach goal, and stay there 2+ years.
At work, we don't spend calories in the tearoom if we can't afford them, like we don't go into debt shopping for groceries in the supermarket.
With possessions, we sometimes like to reward ourselves with a purchase, when we don't even have room for it.
Don't eat it or buy it if you don't have the calories or space for it.
This is how I conceptualize my eating. I "spend" calories when I eat something. Since I'm a numbers person, this works really well.5 -
Today, I reunited some old paintings from inside with the rest which were in our outside room. When my husband saw me doing it, he said, yay! That pleased me so much.
Then, later, he moved some of his speakers to a better storage spot. Feeling quite zen today. 6
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