JUST FOR TODAY ....... One day at a time ..... Daily Commitment Thread for 2018

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Replies

  • Bex953172
    Bex953172 Posts: 4,169 Member
    PhedraJD wrote: »
    Bex953172 wrote: »

    Thank you for this! So nice of you to come out of lurking to message me.
    I feel like a rubbish parent half the time. I constantly worry I'm going to mess them up. I always seem to do things wrong

    No problem. No way can you be a "rubbish" parent. It is quite evident that you love them.

    They have a home, with loving parents, a place to sleep, food on the table, and clothes on their back. Everything else is just gravy!

    My mom (who I think is the most amazing woman in the world.) raised 4 girls, a step daughter and a step son. Told me all you can do is love them, and make the best decisions you can at that time with the information you have on hand.

    I also took a parenting class when my oldest, now 18, was just 2. I learned there are only 3 rules that kids really need to follow. Nothing that hurts themselves, nothing that hurts others, and nothing that hurts their environment. (you can make almost any house rule fit under these.) If they don't they probably don't need to be a rule.

    Pick your battles, what is worth fighting with your kids? Can they learn from natural consequences? IE Eat your lunch..I don't wanna. Okay, then nothing to eat until the next meal. No fighting, put the food in the fridge. They go hungry until the next meal, reheat food and give to them (Or let them have what you made for the next meal)
    They will get hungry, eventually they will understand that if they are hungry they need to eat. Mom isn't going to keep making food and snacks for them between meals.

    Another put your coat on.. Nope. Okay. They go outside and get cold, they complain about it. I'm sorry I told you to put your coat on, you chose not to do it, so now you get to be cold. (only if it is safe to let them go cold.)

    Hopefully, any of the advice, stories help. But just remember you love them, and they know you love them. I also remember as I got older my mom telling me, I love you, but I sure don't like you or your behavior right now.

    My favorite is when my kids tell me they don't like me/hate me. I look at them say it is okay. I love them still, but it isn't my job to make them like me. I must be doing it right. When they become adults we can be friends.

    Ahhh that's clever lol! So basically even at the age of 4 I have to let her make her own decisions (within reason) and she can just learn for herself.
    You've made me feel a hell of a lot better about it.
    I'm doing all I can right now, I could probably try harder but in doing my best and that's what counts!
  • Faebert
    Faebert Posts: 1,588 Member
    Hi all, have had an ok day. Some crazy busy times at work (doing cooking with 60 6 year old children this morning was ambitious!!) and only hit some of my goals but they were significant. Especially avoiding emotional eating and getting myself to hot yoga tonight after some bad news this afternoon.

    Recap Friday goals
    - morning workout ✅
    - April challenge :/ too busy with the classes
    - May challenge ✅
    - June challenge ✅
    - July challenge :| forgot to pre-log this morning for the first time in ages and it made a real difference! Can’t believe this has already started to stick - I felt a bit rudderless even though I knew the choices I was making were what I would have pre-logged...
    - Hot yoga ✅
    - Tan and general ‘grooming’ :| tomorrow when the kids are with their Dad.

    Saturday goals
    - morning workout
    - Make sure kids are packed and ready for 8am
    - Hot yoga @10
    - Heath food store
    - Tan and pampering
    - New phone?
    - April, May and June challenges. Am intentionally not pre-logging this weekend as heading to see my boyfriend so meal plans unknown

    Happy weekend everyone!! X
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,979 Member
    For the first time since Tuesday, I am in charge of supper tonight! My husband never wants to go out and do anything and this week he has not only wanted to go out, but he has also decided he wants take out too much! This is so rare that I feel I have to go along so therefore have struggled with meals this week. Tonight we are having a rotisserie chicken and a salad. There is a severe thunderstorm warning in effect so I don't know if I'll get my walk in, maybe I'll find something to do with my new weights and some stretches.

  • nickssweetheart
    nickssweetheart Posts: 874 Member
    @Bex953172 Your little girl is beautiful! Sounds like all in all it was a better day today?

    @Snowflake1968 I've done weight training with various levels of adherence for a while now, you can message me if you'd like details about what I do, fwiw. I follow a book.

    1. Log everything I eat and stay under goal. :)
    2. Drink 6 cups of water before 3 pm. :neutral: Got 4, not 6.
    3. Do my physical therapy morning and evening. :)
    4. Eat only when hungry. :)
    5. Drink no more than 1 20 oz bottle of diet soda. :)
    6. Do the Aldi grocery shopping, also stop by Sprouts if I have time. :neutral: Didn't get up early enough to go before the appointment with the plumber (who didn't show so I still could have gone!)

    Just for tomorrow:

    1. Adhere to food plan and stay under goal
    2. Drink 8 cups of water
    3. Physical therapy morning and evening
    4. Eat only when hungry
    5. Grocery shopping
  • toaljasa
    toaljasa Posts: 955 Member
    @Bex953172 I just smiled and waved as my JFT goals passed me by! That made me chuckle out loud! Hope you enjoyed your curry and cake. Loved the pics, especially the scrunched up face.

  • bcTRAI
    bcTRAI Posts: 414 Member
    Bex953172 wrote: »
    PhedraJD wrote: »

    Pick your battles, what is worth fighting with your kids? Can they learn from natural consequences? IE Eat your lunch..I don't wanna. Okay, then nothing to eat until the next meal. No fighting, put the food in the fridge. They go hungry until the next meal, reheat food and give to them (Or let them have what you made for the next meal)
    They will get hungry, eventually they will understand that if they are hungry they need to eat. Mom isn't going to keep making food and snacks for them between meals.

    Another put your coat on.. Nope. Okay. They go outside and get cold, they complain about it. I'm sorry I told you to put your coat on, you chose not to do it, so now you get to be cold. (only if it is safe to let them go cold.)

    Hopefully, any of the advice, stories help. But just remember you love them, and they know you love them. I also remember as I got older my mom telling me, I love you, but I sure don't like you or your behavior right now.

    My favorite is when my kids tell me they don't like me/hate me. I look at them say it is okay. I love them still, but it isn't my job to make them like me. I must be doing it right. When they become adults we can be friends.

    @Bex953172 @PhedraJD I did the same thing with mine. When my oldest was 3 she refused to wear her mittens in the middle of frozen winter. I was super tired of weeks of daily arguing over this, ended up allowing her bare hands, she started crying half way to daycare, asked her why she wasn't wearing her mittens. No damage and the mittens always went on thereafter with only a single request.
    Also, the teenage years were not pleasant but my adult children and I are now friends so all the boundaries and sticking to my rules were worth it.
  • bookmeister86
    bookmeister86 Posts: 1,165 Member
    Yesterday's commitments:

    - Log everything I eat :)
    - Stick to food plan :| I had 600 calories spare because of the gym, so decided to eat some back as crisps. Still ended up in the green by 300 so I'm fine with this
    - Go to gym :)
    - 4 bottles water :)
    - No alcohol :D Particularly pleased with this one given it was a Friday!! We spent the evening cleaning and shopping instead as the boyfriend's family are staying this weekend. The flat is no longer a den of filth!!
    - Go through to-do list in order :smile: Didn't get through it all, but quite a bit

    Today's commitments:

    - Log everything I eat
    - Be restrained with food today (can't really plan ahead as spending day out with unpredictable children)
    - Exercise DVD
    - 4 bottles water
    - French podcast, Duolingo, book
    - Read article
  • nickssweetheart
    nickssweetheart Posts: 874 Member
    auntmosmail wrote: »
    Goals for yesterday:
    Stay within my 1409 calorie goal ✔
    Pack for camp ✔
    Grocery shop for my husband ✔
    Get laundry done ✔
    Clean the house some ✔
    Go to bed before midnight: almost

    Goals for today:
    Spray weeds in backyard
    Leave for camp on time

    I'm heading up to camp to volunteer for a week. This has potential to be a disaster as I won't be cooking and there are SO MANY SNACKS sitting out calling my name!! So, I'm going in with a plan: since we are pretty much walking for about 14 hours a day I'm going to eat as much as I need, but not excessively, at meals. I will drink plenty of water; I'm bringing my Camelbak backpack. And I am going to allow myself three-five snacks a day. I'm hoping this will allow me to meet my energy needs while not restricting me so much that I will end up binging on snacks each chance I get.

    I won't be able to post each day, as we don't really have internet at all, but I will report back next weekend!

    Goals for each day (7 days total):
    Eat only what I need at meals
    128 oz of water each day
    Only 3-5 snacks a day

    That sounds so fun! Have a great time, and fabulous planning!
  • toaljasa
    toaljasa Posts: 955 Member
    Have a fabulous weekend!
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  • toaljasa
    toaljasa Posts: 955 Member
    Jft 7/14
    I have prelogged my meals for today
    I have done strength training
    I am going to drink 6-8 cups of water
    I am going to pick up my groceries, come home and quilt!

    Peace and joy, y'all!
  • PackerFanInGB
    PackerFanInGB Posts: 3,451 Member
    Today, I am just going to list a few goals. Have too much teenage GD and DH not-getting-along drama going on today to put a lot of thought into anything.

    Just for Saturday:
    1. Log every bite
    2. Write my Day 1 Becks Diet index cards
    3. Finish top of quilt and pin the layers together
    4. Declutter my closet and move clothes from shelves to dresser in guest room
    5. Start another donate box
    6. Start reading the 3rd manual for the exams I am taking on Monday. (3 total manuals >800 pages UGH)
    7. Mail GD's birthday card
    8. Remain calm while being umpire between GD and DH. It's so exhausting mentally to be in the middle.

    This is going to have to do it!

    @Bex953172 I agree with what everyone is saying about the 4 year old. I used the "consequences" strategy many times also. If one of my kids didn't want to eat, I told them they didn't have to but they weren't getting anything to eat until dinner. They got hungry and I felt like a monster, but they learned real quick. Same with the examples of not putting on their mittens, etc. If it's reasonable and won't hurt them, let them see what the consequences are so they realize you're not trying to boss them around...there are unpleasant side effects when they don't do these things.

    When my daughter was little, she threw herself on the floor in the middle of the dining room and kicked and pounded her fists on the floor and screamed and just threw a horrible tantrum. I calmly picked her up (carefully because she was kicking and screaming) and brought her to her room, laid her down on THAT floor and told her she could kick and scream as long as she wanted in her room and when she's done she can come out. Well, that took the fun right out of the tantrum and it was the last time she threw one.

    One last thing is....I know there is a saying of "terrible two's"....but at my house, that was nothing....at my house it was the Fricking Fours....only I didn't say "fricking" if you catch my drift. Fours were horrible. Then they started kindergarten and became sweet again. :mrgreen:
  • Bex953172
    Bex953172 Posts: 4,169 Member
    Haha thank you everyone so much for the advice on how to help me deal with my 4yo.
    I've read all the comments, some I specifically wanted to respond to but God knows what page they're on now lol so a big thank you to everyone

    The magic 1 2 3, is that what I think it is? Just counting to 3?
    Because today I asked her to do something and got the typical "I don't want to" so I say "okay then, one... Two..."
    *she panicked and did what I said*
    " don't let me get to three!
    *she went even faster*

    Is this why they call it magic lol?!?!
  • HGSmith0920
    HGSmith0920 Posts: 1,123 Member
    JFT, 7/14/18

    1. Take nap
    2. Put table away
    3. Clear off other table
    4. Change litter box
    5. Start laundry
    6. Take Matt dinner
    7. Make shopping list
    8. Aldi's
    9. Take out garbage
    10. Bed whenever


    I think that's it seeing as it's already 3:47pm. Lol
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,979 Member
    Bex953172 wrote: »
    Haha thank you everyone so much for the advice on how to help me deal with my 4yo.
    I've read all the comments, some I specifically wanted to respond to but God knows what page they're on now lol so a big thank you to everyone

    The magic 1 2 3, is that what I think it is? Just counting to 3?
    Because today I asked her to do something and got the typical "I don't want to" so I say "okay then, one... Two..."
    *she panicked and did what I said*
    " don't let me get to three!
    *she went even faster*

    Is this why they call it magic lol?!?!

    That is it, you have to know in your mind what will happen if you reach 3 though and follow through.
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,979 Member
    @Bex953172 my oldest daughter was very sassy and one thing I did was threaten to put pepper on her tongue if she was being sassy. The threat worked and I don’t think I ever had to actually do it. One time though we were driving and she got sassy, I asked her if she wanted pepper. She pipes up and tells me I don’t have any because were in the car. Next time I was in a restaurant I took to go packs of pepper. I carried those packets in my purse for years and she knew it
  • nickssweetheart
    nickssweetheart Posts: 874 Member
    edited July 2018
    Saturday's Goals:

    1. Adhere to food plan and stay under goal :| I'm under goal, but I deviated from my food plan. I got an incredible deal on hamburger buns for 25 cents so I had veggie chicken burgers for dinner instead of the risotto I had planned.
    2. Drink 8 cups of water :)
    3. Physical therapy morning and evening :) Almost forgot this tonight, doing it now.
    4. Eat only when hungry :smile:
    5. Grocery shopping :smile:


    JFT: Sunday

    1. Log everything I eat and stay under goal.
    2. Drink 8 cups of water
    3. Physical therapy morning and evening
    4. Eat only when hungry
    5. Make risotto
  • sarah74_vt
    sarah74_vt Posts: 368 Member
    edited July 2018
    JFY (Saturday 7/14/18)
    1) Log all my food :)
    2) Stay close to "in the green" with my calories (Family BBQ today) :/ (Not terribly bad...probably still at maintenance)
    3) Stay close to "in the green" with my sodium intake :/
    4) Drink all my water before having a Diet Coke :)
    5) Complete Day 9 in my new Beck Diet Solutions :/ (Completely forgot this)

    JFT (Sunday 7/15/18)
    1) Log all my food
    2) Stay "in the green" with my calories
    3) Stay "in the green" with my sodium intake
    4) Drink all my water before having a Diet Coke
    5) Complete Day 9 in my new Beck Diet Solutions
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,979 Member
    @oboeing - that is a lot to take on. Welcome to the group.
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,979 Member
    JFT - Saturday July 14
    2L of Water - :/
    Stay in Green by 150 - :/ Over by 110
    Outside 15 Minutes - :/
    Clean and Laundry - :)

    Well yesterday was a bit of a bust! today is my relaxed day but I may need to change that up a bit.

    JFT -Sunday July 15
    2L of Water
    Stay in Green by 150
    Outside 15 Minutes
    Write in journal

    I have the kids today and their Mom has asked for strawberry shortcake. I think we are going to try to find some good berries and maybe a yard sale or two.

    Hope everyone has a great day.
  • PackerFanInGB
    PackerFanInGB Posts: 3,451 Member
    PackerFanInGB wrote: »

    Just for Saturday:
    1. Log every bite :)
    2. Write my Day 1 Becks Diet index cards :#Well, I FOUND the index cards, so that's a start, right?
    3. Finish top of quilt and pin the layers together B)The quilt saga continues... I was so excited finishing off the top yesterday! My husband came down and told me he really liked it and thinks @Bex953172 is really going to like it. Then I messed up and sewed the material on backwards...had to rip the long seam out and reattach. Sewed it back on, only to find that I must have cut something too wide because the rows are off. Tried to throw a few little stitches in here and there to make the rows straight which really messed things up. Brought upstairs and ended the night tearing out seams in about six different places. I then laid it out on the couch and walked away so I wouldn't do anything else wrong on it. The "baby" quilt has now grown and is almost the size of a toddler bed now. It's probably a good thing since it's taking me forever to get it done! :wink:
    5. Declutter my closet and move clothes from shelves to dresser in guest room :)
    6. Start another donate box :)
    7. Start reading the 3rd manual for the exams I am taking on Monday. (3 total manuals >800 pages UGH) >:)This is what I'm doing today.
    8. Mail GD's birthday card :)
    9. Remain calm while being umpire between GD and DH. It's so exhausting mentally to be in the middle. :)

    Today I have much to accomplish but realistically I won't get it all done. So, rather than set myself up for failure, I will only list my top goals here today. It makes me feel better when I see smiles or stars than when I have to mark everything with frowns.

    My top goal today is to study for re-certification exams I have to take tomorrow. Study materials include three 800-page manuals of "riveting" reading. I have other things I need to do also, so I plan to set a timer to remind myself to get up and walk away every 60 minutes. I'm thinking I will study for 60 minutes, then take 30 minutes to get something else done (call my mom for our weekly coffee-klatch, laundry, food prep, sewing, etc). I only have three tries to pass these exams, and I have failed once. I really need to pass both of them this time because I don't want to give up another weekend, or even another day, to study and I don't want the stress that comes with it.

    Yesterday was a nice day. My youngest son came over in the morning and hung out for a bit while he was waiting for his brother to wake up to go fishing with him. My oldest son works shifts so has a different sleep schedule from his brother. Finally my YS gave up and went without him, but it was nice having coffee outside on the deck with him. Then I gave my GD a ride to work and we stopped off for a Starbucks (I had a hibiscus tea refresher). We had a much needed chat on the way, so that was good.

    Just for Sunday:
    Journal every bite
    One session of Body Groove (being mindful of back and hip)
    Food Prep for week
    Meal Plan for week & make grocery list
    :star::star: Study for tomorrow's recertification exams
    Quilt top (goal is to finish the top)
    Podcasts - Half Size Me (finding I'm getting hooked on these. Very insightful) and try one new one
    Write Becks Day 1 index cards
    Pick out the week's outfits, iron and set aside
    Bed EARLY. Unplug by 9:00 and sleeping by 10:00.

    Have a fantastic day everyone! :heart:

    Tracie

  • PackerFanInGB
    PackerFanInGB Posts: 3,451 Member
    Monthly Challenges:

    July 1: Water :star: / Walk/Move :star: / Mindful Eating :star: / Planning :star:
    July 2: Water :star: / Walk :star: / Mindful Eating :star: / Planning :( [/quote]
    July 3: Water :( / Walk :star: / Mindful Eating :star: / Planning :( [/quote]
    July 4: Water :naughty: / Walk :naughty: / Mindful Eating :star: / Planning :star: [/quote]
    July 5: Water :star: / Walk :naughty: / Mindful Eating :star: / Planning :naughty:
    July 6: Water :neutral: Not as much as I wanted but not bad / Walk :naughty: but to be fair, I had PT and was pretty sore / Mindful Eating :star: / Planning :star:
    July 7: Water :star: / Walk :star: / Mindful Eating: :star: / Planning :star:
    July 8: Water :star: / Walk :naughty: / Mindful Eating :star: / Planning :star:
    July 9: Missed logging
    July 10: Water :star: / Walk :naughty: / mindful eating / :neutral: / Planning :star:
    July 11: Water :star: / Walk :naughty: / Mindful eating :naughty: / Planning :star:
    July 12: Water :star: / Walk :star: not an actual walk, but I did make conscious effort to get up from my desk and move more than normal. Less Sitting. / Mindful Eating :star: / Planning :star:
    July 13: Water :naughty: / Walk :naughty: / Mindful Eating :naughty: / Planning :naughty:
    July 14: Water: ⭐ / Walk ⭐ / Mindful Eating ⭐ Planning :naughty:
    July 15: Water / Walk / Mindful Eating / Planning



    Be the change you wish to see in the world
    2018 Theme: Persistence and Determination
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,979 Member
    PackerFanInGB wrote: »
    PackerFanInGB wrote: »

    Just for Saturday:
    1. Log every bite :)
    2. Write my Day 1 Becks Diet index cards :#Well, I FOUND the index cards, so that's a start, right?
    3. Finish top of quilt and pin the layers together B)The quilt saga continues... I was so excited finishing off the top yesterday! My husband came down and told me he really liked it and thinks @Bex953172 is really going to like it. Then I messed up and sewed the material on backwards...had to rip the long seam out and reattach. Sewed it back on, only to find that I must have cut something too wide because the rows are off. Tried to throw a few little stitches in here and there to make the rows straight which really messed things up. Brought upstairs and ended the night tearing out seams in about six different places. I then laid it out on the couch and walked away so I wouldn't do anything else wrong on it. The "baby" quilt has now grown and is almost the size of a toddler bed now. It's probably a good thing since it's taking me forever to get it done! :wink:
    5. Declutter my closet and move clothes from shelves to dresser in guest room :)
    6. Start another donate box :)
    7. Start reading the 3rd manual for the exams I am taking on Monday. (3 total manuals >800 pages UGH) >:)This is what I'm doing today.
    8. Mail GD's birthday card :)
    9. Remain calm while being umpire between GD and DH. It's so exhausting mentally to be in the middle. :)

    Today I have much to accomplish but realistically I won't get it all done. So, rather than set myself up for failure, I will only list my top goals here today. It makes me feel better when I see smiles or stars than when I have to mark everything with frowns.

    My top goal today is to study for re-certification exams I have to take tomorrow. Study materials include three 800-page manuals of "riveting" reading. I have other things I need to do also, so I plan to set a timer to remind myself to get up and walk away every 60 minutes. I'm thinking I will study for 60 minutes, then take 30 minutes to get something else done (call my mom for our weekly coffee-klatch, laundry, food prep, sewing, etc). I only have three tries to pass these exams, and I have failed once. I really need to pass both of them this time because I don't want to give up another weekend, or even another day, to study and I don't want the stress that comes with it.

    Yesterday was a nice day. My youngest son came over in the morning and hung out for a bit while he was waiting for his brother to wake up to go fishing with him. My oldest son works shifts so has a different sleep schedule from his brother. Finally my YS gave up and went without him, but it was nice having coffee outside on the deck with him. Then I gave my GD a ride to work and we stopped off for a Starbucks (I had a hibiscus tea refresher). We had a much needed chat on the way, so that was good.

    Just for Sunday:
    Journal every bite
    One session of Body Groove (being mindful of back and hip)
    Food Prep for week
    Meal Plan for week & make grocery list
    :star::star: Study for tomorrow's recertification exams
    Quilt top (goal is to finish the top)
    Podcasts - Half Size Me (finding I'm getting hooked on these. Very insightful) and try one new one
    Write Becks Day 1 index cards
    Pick out the week's outfits, iron and set aside
    Bed EARLY. Unplug by 9:00 and sleeping by 10:00.

    Have a fantastic day everyone! :heart:

    Tracie

    I can't imagine having to raise a grandchild at this stage of my life. My MIL is 74 and still raising one granddaughter that just turned 18. I loved car chats the most when my girls were young. They seemed to always open up more in a car than they did anywhere else and it always felt like we made a move forward. I hope that the same occurred for you, it sounds like you have been having a bit of stress with her and your hubby.
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