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Office Gossip
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SnackherBarrell wrote: »
Ima come at you like a spider monkey
Have you ever traveled to St. Barths to drop acid and sunbathe with spider monkeys?
It will change your whole perspective on chit.1 -
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Please. The graphic medical stories. Please stop. I don't need you standing there talking about drain bags and puss. Not in the break room. Not while I'm eating a pudding cup.6
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You just came back from a 2-week vacay, and before that you worked a week „from home”. Stop complaining. Stop it.
Also someone drank all my coconut milk and didn't replace it. I'm going to have someone's head today.
...and then there's you. You left in vacation for like ever, set your autoresponder to contact me for everything, and now I'm getting asked by hotels in Austria if you'd like a baby bed for your stay. Well, have fun. But don't push it, I can forge your signature with my eyes closed.7 -
OMG, how many DUIs are you going to get before they fire your useless *kitten*?
Trick question, they won't. You'll just get shuffled off to another department. I just hope it isn't mine, I had enough of you four years ago.1 -
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Pour_Decisions wrote: »Speaker phone conference call in a cubicle, really? Do you think you're the only one who works here?
That is the perfect time to shout random things like "Who took my green paperclip with the ladybug on top?" or "Does anyone have a letter opener? I can't get into my email!"3 -
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I'm confused how you're on the payroll when you don't actually do anything .... 😶1
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No, IVF is not un-holy. Coworker. My twin 7 year olds aren't unholy either. I might be unholy but because of IVF.4
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SnackherBarrell wrote: »Its 9:51 and you are already saying you're hungry for lunch and is it 5pm yet. I will stab you in the classical with my chewed up pen
I love autocorrect sometimes. Actually, I don't, I hate it but it can be funny.
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Seriously, how loud can you snore IN THE OFFICE? People know you are sleeping and not just "zoning out".2
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SnackherBarrell wrote: »
Let the pranks begin
It's SO LOUD!!! Like something you see out of a movie! I went to his cube one day and asked him a question and he nodded out right when I was talking to him. Ok dude. Carry on
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SnackherBarrell wrote: »
HAHAHAHAHA!!! I like the way you think!0 -
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SnackherBarrell wrote: »
Safety pin his shirt to his chair
Tape on the bottom of his mouse so it doesn't work or take a screenshot of his desktop and then just enlarge it so when he tries to click on the icons nothing happens...lol. He will think he's crazy OR still dreaming!0 -
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SnackherBarrell wrote: »
Ctl + down arrow
That's a good one too!0 -
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