Lose weight = looking older??
Replies
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A few years ago I dropped from size 18 to size 12 and at 45 I do think I looked older than before I lost the weight by quite a lot. Going for it again and now that I'm 50 I'm sure it will be true again. That's ok.4
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I look younger. I recently got together with a whole bunch of guys from high school and most were overweight and looked at least their age or older...myself and one other guy were the only ones that looked fit and healthy. I'm 43 and most people think I'm in my early to maybe mid 30s. Healthy and fit and better muscular development when I compare myself to most people my age.7
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I think it's probably different for each individual. I know that I've looked through lots of before/after photos on the success section of the forum, and most I think look younger in their after photos.
However I can see how losing weight could also make someone look older as well. Having a rounder face could lead to a younger look. It probably depends how much fat is carried in your neck/face as well.
I've only ever been slightly overweight and all my excess fat is carried in my lower half, so losing or gaining weight has never affected my appearance in that way.2 -
I keep thinking this over and wondering: Why is it a problem to look older, especially when the concommitant effects are feeling younger, being healthier, creating a higher likelihood of living longer in independence and good health, being a better example of health and agency for those we love, and so many more positive things? (Rhetorical question, BTW, no need to answer.)
I understand that youthful appearance is a goal for many, but for myself I don't really get it. People say older women are more likely to be ignored, get worse service in businesses, etc. I very rarely see this . . . and believe me, when I do, I know how to make myself un-ignored pretty darned quickly.
Yeah, much-younger guys don't hit on me. I think it would be icky if they did, speaking only for myself. Guys my own age don't hit on me much, either, but that's fine: If a few wrinkles put them off, I don't need them in my life, because they're *baby-feline*heads. (IRL, I think my personality puts off more people than my appearance, actually.
).
I'd also add this, to people worrying about loose facial/neck skin at goal weight: Keep in mind that it can keep shrinking for a long time in maintenance, if it's true loose skin (thin wrinkles, not residual squish-y fat areas). Also, glycogen replenishment will create appearance improvements as well. I think my face/neck look better in year 3 of maintenance than they did in the first weeks at goal.
The youth-glorifying and youth-seeking in our culture really annoys me sometimes. Aging is good. Consider the actual alternative.
JMO.24 -
ssssanaaaa wrote: »I always thought it was the opposite! Also, realize that we all see 'flaws' in ourselves that are literally invisible to other (not that age is a flaw at all!). I'd bet anything that other people think you look younger now and not older!
I think this is true. When I look in the mirror I think I look much older than when I was heavy (I'm 55 years old, down about 45 pounds from my heaviest).
But the number one comment I've heard from friends and neighbours is that I look so much younger now that I've lost weight. In fact, I can't count the number of times I've been told that! I absolutely can't see it, but I'll take their word for it!6 -
Depends on how much weight you lose and your age. The older we get the elasticity of the skin lessons so if you lose a great deal of weight in a relatively short time, skin will sag more making people look older. I like the earlier comment from the guy who said, "i choose function over form."4
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I keep thinking this over and wondering: Why is it a problem to look older, especially when the concommitant effects are feeling younger, being healthier, creating a higher likelihood of living longer in independence and good health, being a better example of health and agency for those we love, and so many more positive things? (Rhetorical question, BTW, no need to answer.)
I understand that youthful appearance is a goal for many, but for myself I don't really get it. People say older women are more likely to be ignored, get worse service in businesses, etc. I very rarely see this . . . and believe me, when I do, I know how to make myself un-ignored pretty darned quickly.
Yeah, much-younger guys don't hit on me. I think it would be icky if they did, speaking only for myself. Guys my own age don't hit on me much, either, but that's fine: If a few wrinkles put them off, I don't need them in my life, because they're *baby-feline*heads. (IRL, I think my personality puts off more people than my appearance, actually. ).
I'd also add this, to people worrying about loose facial/neck skin at goal weight: Keep in mind that it can keep shrinking for a long time in maintenance, if it's true loose skin (thin wrinkles, not residual squish-y fat areas). Also, glycogen replenishment will create appearance improvements as well. I think my face/neck look better in year 3 of maintenance than they did in the first weeks at goal.
The youth-glorifying and youth-seeking in our culture really annoys me sometimes. Aging is good. Consider the actual alternative.
JMO.
Wise words from @AnnPT77 as always
My parents both died young (44 and 55). I've always said if I was privileged enough to get old I'd do it gracefully. Now, time will test that, I'm sure At 39, I know I don't look 25 any more but I'd say I'm far from 'old.' 10 -
Me too. I look more tired - the slightly more hollow cheeks seems to emphasize my eye bags.
That being said... I am more tired and older than I was when I started LOL7 -
I keep thinking this over and wondering: Why is it a problem to look older, especially when the concommitant effects are feeling younger, being healthier, creating a higher likelihood of living longer in independence and good health, being a better example of health and agency for those we love, and so many more positive things? (Rhetorical question, BTW, no need to answer.)
I understand that youthful appearance is a goal for many, but for myself I don't really get it. People say older women are more likely to be ignored, get worse service in businesses, etc. I very rarely see this . . . and believe me, when I do, I know how to make myself un-ignored pretty darned quickly.
Yeah, much-younger guys don't hit on me. I think it would be icky if they did, speaking only for myself. Guys my own age don't hit on me much, either, but that's fine: If a few wrinkles put them off, I don't need them in my life, because they're *baby-feline*heads. (IRL, I think my personality puts off more people than my appearance, actually. ).
I'd also add this, to people worrying about loose facial/neck skin at goal weight: Keep in mind that it can keep shrinking for a long time in maintenance, if it's true loose skin (thin wrinkles, not residual squish-y fat areas). Also, glycogen replenishment will create appearance improvements as well. I think my face/neck look better in year 3 of maintenance than they did in the first weeks at goal.
The youth-glorifying and youth-seeking in our culture really annoys me sometimes. Aging is good. Consider the actual alternative.
JMO.
Wise words from @AnnPT77 as always
My parents both died young (44 and 55). I've always said if I was privileged enough to get old I'd do it gracefully. Now, time will test that, I'm sure At 39, I know I don't look 25 any more but I'd say I'm far from 'old.'
Yes!
At 62, I'm getting kinda old, I think. As a 18-year survivor of stage III breast cancer, and 20 years a cancer widow, I think "old" is a pretty wonderful gift. Alive is such a great start on the rest of my day! (And healthy weight is a great bonus, BTW.)
ETA: Thank you for the kind compliment, Pinuplove! :flowerforyou:24 -
I keep thinking this over and wondering: Why is it a problem to look older, especially when the concommitant effects are feeling younger, being healthier, creating a higher likelihood of living longer in independence and good health, being a better example of health and agency for those we love, and so many more positive things? (Rhetorical question, BTW, no need to answer.)
I understand that youthful appearance is a goal for many, but for myself I don't really get it. People say older women are more likely to be ignored, get worse service in businesses, etc. I very rarely see this . . . and believe me, when I do, I know how to make myself un-ignored pretty darned quickly.
Yeah, much-younger guys don't hit on me. I think it would be icky if they did, speaking only for myself. Guys my own age don't hit on me much, either, but that's fine: If a few wrinkles put them off, I don't need them in my life, because they're *baby-feline*heads. (IRL, I think my personality puts off more people than my appearance, actually. ).
I'd also add this, to people worrying about loose facial/neck skin at goal weight: Keep in mind that it can keep shrinking for a long time in maintenance, if it's true loose skin (thin wrinkles, not residual squish-y fat areas). Also, glycogen replenishment will create appearance improvements as well. I think my face/neck look better in year 3 of maintenance than they did in the first weeks at goal.
The youth-glorifying and youth-seeking in our culture really annoys me sometimes. Aging is good. Consider the actual alternative.
JMO.
A big amen to all of this! Nobody ignores this old lady, either.6 -
Judging from your picture you look better than the average 49 year olds so don’t trip1
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I feel like I look more childlike when I loose weight, honestly.2
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I definitely look my actual age when I lose weight.
When I'm bigger, I look younger.
I got asked if my 10-year-old was my little brother at my biggest hahaha.2 -
After losing weight, I look younger. I was a young mom (20 yrs old) but when I was heavier I was never asked or confused for my son's sister. He and I both get asked all the time now if I'm his sister. I proudly say, "no, I'm his mother and I have the stretch marks and alcohol problem to prove it." LOL
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I look older than I ever have.I now have wrinkles I didnt have before since losing weight. its aggravating and wish I could afford fillers or something. I look like I smoked for years, never smoked at all. Im 44 and I think I look older. I used to get ID'ed all the time when buying hubbys cigarettes or beer. now I never get asked.10
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I think a lot depends on if you change your style along with your weight. If you update your hair make up and clothes it can make a big difference to peoples perception of your age. I have noticed this a lot in the before and afters.
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I keep thinking this over and wondering: Why is it a problem to look older, especially when the concommitant effects are feeling younger, being healthier, creating a higher likelihood of living longer in independence and good health, being a better example of health and agency for those we love, and so many more positive things? (Rhetorical question, BTW, no need to answer.)
I understand that youthful appearance is a goal for many, but for myself I don't really get it. People say older women are more likely to be ignored, get worse service in businesses, etc. I very rarely see this . . . and believe me, when I do, I know how to make myself un-ignored pretty darned quickly.
Yeah, much-younger guys don't hit on me. I think it would be icky if they did, speaking only for myself. Guys my own age don't hit on me much, either, but that's fine: If a few wrinkles put them off, I don't need them in my life, because they're *baby-feline*heads. (IRL, I think my personality puts off more people than my appearance, actually. ).
I'd also add this, to people worrying about loose facial/neck skin at goal weight: Keep in mind that it can keep shrinking for a long time in maintenance, if it's true loose skin (thin wrinkles, not residual squish-y fat areas). Also, glycogen replenishment will create appearance improvements as well. I think my face/neck look better in year 3 of maintenance than they did in the first weeks at goal.
The youth-glorifying and youth-seeking in our culture really annoys me sometimes. Aging is good. Consider the actual alternative.
JMO.
I guess it doesn't in theory bother me to look older than my age but I am married to someone 6 years younger than me who has been mistaken for a college student even though he is on the other side of 30 as well. I would be upset if I was mistaken for his mother or grandmother. Grateful to be alive and healthy no matter what but it could bother me to look older.
So far I look my age or a few years younger.
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Ok this is going to be gross to most, but as the turkey neck appeared the chest went flat. At 64 you expect things to slide so imagine my disappointment when not only is gravity taking over but weight loss has made the girls just look sad. I feel better and get around better, but I’ll never let my husband see me naked again.16
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LisaMelton1 wrote: »Ok this is going to be gross to most, but as the turkey neck appeared the chest went flat. At 64 you expect things to slide so imagine my disappointment when not only is gravity taking over but weight loss has made the girls just look sad. I feel better and get around better, but I’ll never let my husband see me naked again.
I'm sure your husband loves you regardless, while I might not be totally happy with my aging neck and some sagging in other areas I'm happy for hubby to see me as I am. Men aren't perfect either!12 -
I've always been slim /thin and when I was younger it was great. However, when I got to my mid 50s (I'm now 63) I noticed I was ageing more quickly than my larger friends of the same age. I went from looking younger than I was, to (in my opinion) looking about 10 years older. I second that about turkey neck and loathe having my photo taken.
Doesn't always work that way though - my husband, who's always looked younger than his age, recently lost weight and now looks even younger. Life isn't fair.5 -
GaleHawkins wrote: »LivingtheLeanDream wrote: »Hi all,
I have to say I think I look older now than when I was heavier, less fat to puff out the wrinkles I suppose! (I'm 49). I choose being slim and healthy so if a side effect is looking a bit older that's just how it has to be.
I have noticed from the majority of the before/after photos hardly anyone looks younger with weight off (unless they are young of course!).
Anyway, just putting this out there for opinions/thoughts.
Ruth
I know I looked older so I grew a beard to keep down the remarks about my hollow looking face. Over the last few months I have let it grow at the request of my daughter due to Christmas season coming. Now the wife states I look 10 years older than ever. Pleasing all the women all of the time is not my forte it seems.
Health comes first over looks in my book. I never want my fat jaws back.
I envy men their ability to grow a beard!4 -
All the people around my age (late 40's & early 50's) who are overweight look worse to me than the ones that are relatively "fit".
Looks aside, the quality of life for the "fit" ones is usually demonstrably better than the overweight crowd.
It doesn't matter how old you are or "look", per se.
If you are too "out of shape" to have fun with your friends and family or you are embarrassed to do things then what is the point?
I'm more "fit" (i.e. more strong, flexible, and capable) than most people half my age and I can demonstrate that or take advantage of it at will.
I'm also told I look like I'm in my 30's instead of nearly 50.
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Just went to my 35th class reunion. While fat does fill out a number of wrinkles, the things that really seem to make people look older are smoking and heavy alcohol use.
Of course, I was one of the youngest in my class. But we are all 53-54 years old now, so it's largely a distinction without a difference today.
I did get a lot of compliments for looking good. Didn't see too many jocks that were still in playing condition. I think I could play some pickup ball right now.
I did go for a 53 mile bicycle ride the day after the reunion...11 -
I keep thinking this over and wondering: Why is it a problem to look older, especially when the concomitant effects are feeling younger, being healthier, creating a higher likelihood of living longer in independence and good health, being a better example of health and agency for those we love, and so many more positive things? (Rhetorical question, BTW, no need to answer.)
I understand that youthful appearance is a goal for many, but for myself I don't really get it. People say older women are more likely to be ignored, get worse service in businesses, etc. I very rarely see this . . . and believe me, when I do, I know how to make myself un-ignored pretty darned quickly.
Yeah, much-younger guys don't hit on me. I think it would be icky if they did, speaking only for myself. Guys my own age don't hit on me much, either, but that's fine: If a few wrinkles put them off, I don't need them in my life, because they're *baby-feline*heads. (IRL, I think my personality puts off more people than my appearance, actually. ).
I'd also add this, to people worrying about loose facial/neck skin at goal weight: Keep in mind that it can keep shrinking for a long time in maintenance, if it's true loose skin (thin wrinkles, not residual squish-y fat areas). Also, glycogen replenishment will create appearance improvements as well. I think my face/neck look better in year 3 of maintenance than they did in the first weeks at goal.
The youth-glorifying and youth-seeking in our culture really annoys me sometimes. Aging is good. Consider the actual alternative.
JMO.
Hear Hear!
Wrinkles and scars are badges of honor, so why would you hide these or attempt to minimize them?
Does society truly want to esteem aesthetics over wisdom? Are we prepared for the consequences of this?10 -
I think I maybe look older, but more as a result of a bit of sagging residual loose skin (or loose skin with some subcutaneous fat) on my face. My neck looks a little stringier, but I don't know whether it counts as turkey neck or not . . . in any case, I don't think it looks worse than the double chins did, just different.
What matters more to me is that I feel much younger, feel more like myself somehow, joints hurt less (and less frequently), I can do more, and I think I move in a younger way than when I was obese. I had been starting to walk with that side-to-side rocking motion you see in heavy older women, and now I have a regular walk with more hip mobility, more scamper-y, even.
I'm 62, if that matters - was 59-60 when I lost 50ish pounds, now maintaining.
In the "Photo Only Success Stories" thread, I think most people look younger in their after photos.
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1167854/photo-only-success-stories
Thanks for sharing this I found it really helpful and inspiring.3 -
When I look back at some of the pics when I first lost weight (I'm six years in maintenance now), I do look older a bit. I think, for me, I started looking better/more youthful after switching what I ate, not worrying as much about calories as much (though I still monitor what I eat and weigh closely). I've gone to much more of a Whole Food, plant based diet. Part of it for me, I think, is also being much more active, which takes time to build. I'm a lot more physically active than even when I lost the weight. I've also put on 15 lbs of muscle (now that's over 5 years), but that also makes a major difference as well.
Others have touched on this, looking healthy trumps looking young. I played Pickleball last night with a guy that was 86! He started playing at 83. No kidding. Although I'm new to Pickleball, I played a lot of tennis in my youth and (at least I like to think) I'm pretty athletic. He carried my sorry butt as my partner. I want to be that guy. That's something. Plus, he's sharp as a tack. Was trying to sign me up (he's a financial consultant too) to his business. You would think, at most, he's in his early 70s. Looks amazing.9 -
I certainly look better now than when I was 995 lbs, looking like an overfilled balloon. I wouldn't say, that looked youthful at all. Being that I have decided to drop some more weight, I do go through stages of having that shocked & sick gaunt look, which tends to normalise after a week.
Aging was not a gauge I tracked with my face, rather that the lost fat concealed a lot of my brawl scars, which are more visible now. I notice my split eyelid scar, which to me looks like an inch long scar - north to south... The scar above my lip ... My broken nose bridge... I don't have eye bags on most days, however, I feel that my orbitals are more pronounced. I no longer look like I have tiny beady eyes poking out of a puffy face. I massage my face excessively, so now my eyebrows are further apart and located at a higher profile than they were before.lol Had I not been doing that all these years, my eyebrows would be kissing my eyes right now.
The trade off for me though is, I can fill my cheeks with air(mouth fill technique) and I can actually see it VS what it was like before my losses - no visible change.10 -
I keep thinking this over and wondering: Why is it a problem to look older, especially when the concomitant effects are feeling younger, being healthier, creating a higher likelihood of living longer in independence and good health, being a better example of health and agency for those we love, and so many more positive things? (Rhetorical question, BTW, no need to answer.)
I understand that youthful appearance is a goal for many, but for myself I don't really get it. People say older women are more likely to be ignored, get worse service in businesses, etc. I very rarely see this . . . and believe me, when I do, I know how to make myself un-ignored pretty darned quickly.
Yeah, much-younger guys don't hit on me. I think it would be icky if they did, speaking only for myself. Guys my own age don't hit on me much, either, but that's fine: If a few wrinkles put them off, I don't need them in my life, because they're *baby-feline*heads. (IRL, I think my personality puts off more people than my appearance, actually. ).
I'd also add this, to people worrying about loose facial/neck skin at goal weight: Keep in mind that it can keep shrinking for a long time in maintenance, if it's true loose skin (thin wrinkles, not residual squish-y fat areas). Also, glycogen replenishment will create appearance improvements as well. I think my face/neck look better in year 3 of maintenance than they did in the first weeks at goal.
The youth-glorifying and youth-seeking in our culture really annoys me sometimes. Aging is good. Consider the actual alternative.
JMO.
Hear Hear!
Wrinkles and scars are badges of honor, so why would you hide these or attempt to minimize them?
Does society truly want to esteem aesthetics over wisdom? Are we prepared for the consequences of this?
Not everyone feels scars and wrinkles are badges of honor. My wrinkles I'm meh about. My scars are daily, constant reminders of the worst places I've been. I don't want to remember how shizzle my life is/was. I want to forget.
Sorry for being a b*tch about that, but it really irritates me to be told I should be proud of my scars because "you've been through so much" or "look at what you lived through".19 -
I looked young enough to periodically get carded (well into my 50's - genetics) when I bought alcohol, until I lost 84 lbs in 8 months.
Of course, "correlation does not necessarily mean causation", so it is possible that time, chronic illness or a combination of those and the drastic weight gain then loss, finally caught up with me.
Now, I definitely look my age. I don't mind, but it is weird when I look in the mirror - I look so different.
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If you're older then you should look older, that's just how it works.12
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