What I Hate About Watching My Weight/New Lifestyle/Dieting, etc. (A Place to Vent)
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I hate how my body obviously wants to hang onto the 80 kg. If I deviate even a little, eat a treat - within my budget - my weight goes back up over the 80 line instantly. I know that's not how it works, but it sure is how it feels at te moment. I hate having to be super strict to make any further progress (I have lost 15 kg and want to lose another 5-7 kg). Man, this is getting really hard.14
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Packerjohn wrote: »Packerjohn wrote: »The poster that brought up.the smile thing didn't mention anything about the guy leering at her, mentioning anything about her appearance.
I would not get all hot and bothered if someone regardless of sexual orientation greeted me with a come on smile comment in passing at the gym.
Might find it hard to smile if just lost a loved one, but most likely not at the gym either.
It wouldn't bother you b/c you haven't heard it every Effing day of your Effing life--having other people tell you how you "should" present yourself, etc.
And please don't try to defend yourself--there is no way you can make any argument we WOMEN haven't heard about this issue. And every single one of them is simply wrong.
FTR, I for one might well be at the gym (or rather, out for a run) after losing a loved one. It might be one of very few things I can do at that point. So perhaps you should not make assumptions about what type of day someone is having based on the fact that they are, in fact, not at the gym.
I am truly sorry you've had such bad life experiences that what was mostly delivered as a well meant greeting is taken as you being ordered/forced to do something.
Hope things get better.
Note the patronising and condescending tone of your reply? That's how it feels when a stranger orders me to smile. Please do not tell women how they are supposed to feel when they are facing the casual, everyday sexism that goes unnoticed by men.35 -
shiny_shiny wrote: »I'm really surprised there are so many people defending this man telling a woman to "smile".
It's such a cliche at this point that it's a trope on TV and in film: an example of the patriarchy policing women's appearance; the expectation that we will shape our presence into something agreeable and pleasant and non-threatening to others; as well as a refusal of our inner life.
This man might have "meant well" and likely had no idea that's what this gesture means. But that's what it means.
Its mentioned in 'The Good Place' as a reason for men to get sent to the bad place! Any men reading, please be aware of how this makes women feel and stop doing it. It is not my role in life to be pretty and pleasant for strangers for their enjoyment, whatever their intention.24 -
fourtherecord wrote: »shiny_shiny wrote: »I'm really surprised there are so many people defending this man telling a woman to "smile".
It's such a cliche at this point that it's a trope on TV and in film: an example of the patriarchy policing women's appearance; the expectation that we will shape our presence into something agreeable and pleasant and non-threatening to others; as well as a refusal of our inner life.
This man might have "meant well" and likely had no idea that's what this gesture means. But that's what it means.
Its mentioned in 'The Good Place' as a reason for men to get sent to the bad place! Any men reading, please be aware of how this makes women feel and stop doing it. It is not my role in life to be pretty and pleasant for strangers for their enjoyment, whatever their intention.
It may depend on the woman, and I agree they should understand how culturally sensitive this behavior is, even if they didn't really mean any malice. I don't mind it if it happens to me (although I totally understand how some women may take offense). Personally, I would just smile. I believe most people don't analyze the things they say so I take them positively at face value.6 -
working in an office where we have shared morning teas and pizza and sweets all. the. freaking. time.
I've been pretty good at not indulging but I did have a mini raspberry white choc muffin today and it was delicious ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I find judgement from other people when I say "no thank you" to whatever they're offering pretty annoying also.
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I went to Applebees the other night. The meal that I normally get is 1200 calories. The app I usually get before my meal is like 1100 calories. I'd get multiple sweet teas totaling hundreds of calories. And I didn't care. I miss not caring. I miss when being fat didn't bother me.14
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FutureMrsCarver89 wrote: »I went to Applebees the other night. The meal that I normally get is 1200 calories. The app I usually get before my meal is like 1100 calories. I'd get multiple sweet teas totaling hundreds of calories. And I didn't care. I miss not caring. I miss when being fat didn't bother me.
Yeah, I miss not caring how much something "cost" before I ate it. Just stuff whatever, whenever into my piehole.
Lying around, mindlessly eating and binge watching stuff on the weekends. A thing of the past. sigh
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stephieleee wrote: »I find judgement from other people when I say "no thank you" to whatever they're offering pretty annoying also.
This!3 -
amusedmonkey wrote: »fourtherecord wrote: »shiny_shiny wrote: »I'm really surprised there are so many people defending this man telling a woman to "smile".
It's such a cliche at this point that it's a trope on TV and in film: an example of the patriarchy policing women's appearance; the expectation that we will shape our presence into something agreeable and pleasant and non-threatening to others; as well as a refusal of our inner life.
This man might have "meant well" and likely had no idea that's what this gesture means. But that's what it means.
Its mentioned in 'The Good Place' as a reason for men to get sent to the bad place! Any men reading, please be aware of how this makes women feel and stop doing it. It is not my role in life to be pretty and pleasant for strangers for their enjoyment, whatever their intention.
It may depend on the woman, and I agree they should understand how culturally sensitive this behavior is, even if they didn't really mean any malice. I don't mind it if it happens to me (although I totally understand how some women may take offense). Personally, I would just smile. I believe most people don't analyze the things they say so I take them positively at face value.
Agreed. What I have noticed, n=1, with working with mostly women for 14 years is, to some people, I am always going to be "evil". No matter how I act. We are all a product of our past that constructs our views of the present. Sad, I grew up in a small town in the bible belt and had many misconceptions of how things are. I tell one story of how my environment shaped my conceptions of certain people and how it changed. I was brought up being told homosexual people were just evil. They were deviants just trying to make me evil by trying to make me like them. Making ne generally homophobic. I went to college and was playing football. There were open showers at the dorm and in the locker room. All Male dorm with young, generally macho type guys. Well I made friends with a guy, who on the surface seemed straight. Always talking to ladies. Picking them up at bars.... you know ect.... well, showered with the guy 100's of times. We had all gone out one night and got drunk as skunk. So, we used to kick doors on dorms instead of knocking when people were hung over before we went to breakfast. Well.... we kicked his door and the lock busted. He was naked with another dude in the bed! He later that day told us he was "gay". This guy who is still a friend of mine! Had to make me look at my ideas. He never tries to change me. He never did anything to me. What I had to realize is that, he was just a person.14 -
quiksylver296 wrote: »VanVanDiane wrote: »
RIGHT?!? I hate wasting the delicious points (calories) on non-delicious foods! :mad:
Gluten-free bakeries catch me out every time! On the rare occasions I'm in the vicinity of one I'm absolutely fine with spending calories on something fresh and delicious. I hate it when I pick something that doesn't taste any better than something I can get packaged at Safeway. And no, there's no way I'm saving calories by just not eating more than a bite. Just no way.
YES. It's like, OOH, OK, yay, gluten-free cookie! And then it *sucks*, and it's all, "OK, wait, WTF did I waste my calories on this?"4 -
collectingblues wrote: »quiksylver296 wrote: »VanVanDiane wrote: »
RIGHT?!? I hate wasting the delicious points (calories) on non-delicious foods! :mad:
Gluten-free bakeries catch me out every time! On the rare occasions I'm in the vicinity of one I'm absolutely fine with spending calories on something fresh and delicious. I hate it when I pick something that doesn't taste any better than something I can get packaged at Safeway. And no, there's no way I'm saving calories by just not eating more than a bite. Just no way.
YES. It's like, OOH, OK, yay, gluten-free cookie! And then it *sucks*, and it's all, "OK, wait, WTF did I waste my calories on this?"
I'm not ashamed to spit something out after I take a taste of it and it's not up to my standards. Of course I will do it discreetly LOL9 -
pinggolfer96 wrote: »Looking at food as numbers now even when I don’t want to it just happens
Round things with holes: 300.6 -
When things don't add up, but the scale decides to bump on up the wrong direction for days in a row.
The past week, my activity was significantly more than the past couple months. Between a conference at work that had me walking more than 3X my normal daily steps, followed by a race weekend, and the entire time I did a pretty good job of sticking to my meal plan, avoiding all the treats, avoiding the sodas, etc, etc - and the past three days (now that I'm back home and eating "normally") I've "gained" nearly a pound a day!!
Now, I know there's no way on this earth I ate that much food, and I know it's probably all water weight between the activity and higher sodium meals, but it's still SUPER frustrating when you tried to make good choices (when the worse choices were right there in front of you), and the scale just decides to throw a bit "F-YOU" in your face every morning.15 -
The convenience of just going through a drive thru constantly tempts me. I am a major foodie - quite honestly, I think it borders on addiction. So just being so close to these places tests my willpower every single day.9
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HoneyBadger155 wrote: »When things don't add up, but the scale decides to bump on up the wrong direction for days in a row.
The past week, my activity was significantly more than the past couple months. Between a conference at work that had me walking more than 3X my normal daily steps, followed by a race weekend, and the entire time I did a pretty good job of sticking to my meal plan, avoiding all the treats, avoiding the sodas, etc, etc - and the past three days (now that I'm back home and eating "normally") I've "gained" nearly a pound a day!!
Now, I know there's no way on this earth I ate that much food, and I know it's probably all water weight between the activity and higher sodium meals, but it's still SUPER frustrating when you tried to make good choices (when the worse choices were right there in front of you), and the scale just decides to throw a bit "F-YOU" in your face every morning.
Yup. Practically doubled my activity levels last week. Weighed all my foods and came in about 1.5k under (net) due to exercise, and ended up gaining 1.5 lbs. wtf? I'm clearly bulking
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kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »Just a few months ago I had a customer tell me they had asked a coworker at my thinnest if I was dying of cancer.
People often comment on my weight, either to me or to my family. My brother in law decided to have some fun and hinted it was "due to cancer, but we're not talking about it." And would make comments like "it was pretty much touch and go for a while." And people believed him. I can see the funny side in the fun he was having, it was people believing cancer was the cause of my weight loss that bugged me. Did/do I really look that sick?
The main thing I hate about weight loss is the comments
"You don't have to watch what you eat, you're already skinny"
"eat a cheeseburger damnit, you're disappearing. "
Or commenting that I need to stop losing weight... um, I've been maintaining for over a year now. My weight fluctuates +/- 1kg.
If I eat something small or "healthy" my friends comment no wonder you're so thin. If I eat something large or "unhealthy" they comment I'm lucky to stay so thin.
My mum believes thin equals sick. So when I am sick it's because I'm too skinny. When I'm tired, it's not the long work hours and broken sleep, it's because I'm too skinny.10 -
I *kitten* hate going to bed hungry.10
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HoneyBadger155 wrote: »When things don't add up, but the scale decides to bump on up the wrong direction for days in a row.
This is me this week. I went to a party Saturday night and expected a bump Monday but not too much happened. Tuesday and Wednesday though, a pound up each day. Whyyyyyy!6 -
Having to sacrifice my social life because alcohol has calories1
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VanVanDiane wrote: »HoneyBadger155 wrote: »When things don't add up, but the scale decides to bump on up the wrong direction for days in a row.
The past week, my activity was significantly more than the past couple months. Between a conference at work that had me walking more than 3X my normal daily steps, followed by a race weekend, and the entire time I did a pretty good job of sticking to my meal plan, avoiding all the treats, avoiding the sodas, etc, etc - and the past three days (now that I'm back home and eating "normally") I've "gained" nearly a pound a day!!
Now, I know there's no way on this earth I ate that much food, and I know it's probably all water weight between the activity and higher sodium meals, but it's still SUPER frustrating when you tried to make good choices (when the worse choices were right there in front of you), and the scale just decides to throw a bit "F-YOU" in your face every morning.
Yup. Practically doubled my activity levels last week. Weighed all my foods and came in about 1.5k under (net) due to exercise, and ended up gaining 1.5 lbs. wtf? I'm clearly bulking
This is random, but what are the icons on your profile pic? I see a few people with the same ones.1
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