My Dr. Called me fat...😩

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Replies

  • MarvinsFitLife
    MarvinsFitLife Posts: 874 Member
    @NashvilleRealtor hey sometimes we need a “pinch” to get our attention but don’t worry you’re apart of a supportive community you will be successful if you put in the work. Welcome!
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,458 Member
    try2again wrote: »
    cmriverside wrote: »

    To be fair though - I had the same female doctor when I was 80 pounds heavier and she never said one word about my weight when I came in and complained about all kinds of health issues that now are resolved simply by my weight loss. So, her non-action on my weight was also a problem.

    Same experience. I had been to my doctor for several issues, mostly GI, and after several expensive tests that came back OK, I took it upon myself to lose some weight and see how that would impact things. All of my issues disappeared, and the next time I saw the doctor she was excited and proclaimed, "I thought that would help!" Oh really? Then why did she never say so? I'm the type of person that readily responds to authority, so if she'd said something, I absolutely would have gotten on it sooner. But like you say, for others, if their doctor were to say, "I think if you lost 30 lbs, it might significantly improve your symptoms", they would be offended.

    Exactly.

    I think they should have some sort of hand-out brochure about body weight, BMI, exercise, healthy nutrition.

    Only problem with that is that healthy people don't need doctors and/or prescriptions or procedures.

  • Taz6o5
    Taz6o5 Posts: 3,441 Member
    Maybe in some way the doctor was trying to motivate you .
    He dose lack bed side manners .
  • Barfly57
    Barfly57 Posts: 333 Member
    Some of the best doctors I've seen have had the WORST people skills, nevermind bedside manners (think Sheldon Cooper). If I'm feeling charitable I can chalk it up to their single-minded focus on medicine. Other times I'll call it the doctors' god complex.
    That being said, my doctor tells me to lose weight every time I see her. Most doctors won't, as has been said here, because of the possible backlash.
    And, a lot of doctors, surprisingly, don't have a lot of background in nutrition or fitness.
  • rheddmobile
    rheddmobile Posts: 6,840 Member
    cheryldumais wrote: »
    Hmmm, I too find it odd that he would comment on a woman that is 135 pounds. I get that you are shorter than some but really not that far over and I think he’s focused too much on weight as a reason for your health issues. Losing a bit won’t hurt you but I think a doctor who is more balanced in his/her approach might be an idea for future. Anyway welcome to MFP you will find loads of helpful folks on here.

    Yeah, I just input the numbers into a BMI calculator - 25.5 is only barely overweight - not enough to seriously impact health, and some studies have even found that a weight in this range is associated with better health than being normal weight. If the patient had noticeably gained weight since the last visit it might be worth mentioning that she should probably start keeping an eye on things, but there's no reason for a doctor to be warning a patient about their weight at this point otherwise.
  • Fear_The_Turtle
    Fear_The_Turtle Posts: 107 Member
    Yeah the pinch was going too far. It's tacky, if not completely inappropriate. My doc would tell me the health reasons why I should lose weight. She was also super excited about my labs when I started losing.

    My story: I decided I was never going to lose weight but I should at least be active, so I hired a trainer and started working out and that inspired me to eat better. After an injury I started gaining again. Finally stopped the slide but am struggling to get back to losing. I'm still active anyway.
  • kbmnurse1
    kbmnurse1 Posts: 316 Member
    He pinched your stomach. Sounds like harassment and inappropriate behavior to me. Get a new MD quick.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    rheddmobile wrote: »
    cheryldumais wrote: »
    Hmmm, I too find it odd that he would comment on a woman that is 135 pounds. I get that you are shorter than some but really not that far over and I think he’s focused too much on weight as a reason for your health issues. Losing a bit won’t hurt you but I think a doctor who is more balanced in his/her approach might be an idea for future. Anyway welcome to MFP you will find loads of helpful folks on here.

    Yeah, I just input the numbers into a BMI calculator - 25.5 is only barely overweight - not enough to seriously impact health, and some studies have even found that a weight in this range is associated with better health than being normal weight. If the patient had noticeably gained weight since the last visit it might be worth mentioning that she should probably start keeping an eye on things, but there's no reason for a doctor to be warning a patient about their weight at this point otherwise.

    I got told by a nurse that I had gained weight in the year since my last appointment (repeat prescription) when I wasn't even in the overweight category at the higher rate...

    :huh:
  • joha5603
    joha5603 Posts: 102 Member
    I had a nutritionist suggest to me once -- in the middle of my pregnancy, no less -- that I should aim to get back to whatever I weighed when I was 18. Good lord, woman. No. JUST NO times infinity.
  • try2again
    try2again Posts: 3,562 Member
    edited December 2018
    TavistockToad wrote: »
    rheddmobile wrote: »
    cheryldumais wrote: »
    Hmmm, I too find it odd that he would comment on a woman that is 135 pounds. I get that you are shorter than some but really not that far over and I think he’s focused too much on weight as a reason for your health issues. Losing a bit won’t hurt you but I think a doctor who is more balanced in his/her approach might be an idea for future. Anyway welcome to MFP you will find loads of helpful folks on here.

    Yeah, I just input the numbers into a BMI calculator - 25.5 is only barely overweight - not enough to seriously impact health, and some studies have even found that a weight in this range is associated with better health than being normal weight. If the patient had noticeably gained weight since the last visit it might be worth mentioning that she should probably start keeping an eye on things, but there's no reason for a doctor to be warning a patient about their weight at this point otherwise.

    I got told by a nurse that I had gained weight in the year since my last appointment (repeat prescription) when I wasn't even in the overweight category at the higher rate...

    :huh:

    I don't think it's unusual for a doctor or nurse to note a weight gain (or loss) out loud without necessarily being critical... just an FYI sort of deal. Of course, can't speak to how it was said.
  • witchaywoman81
    witchaywoman81 Posts: 280 Member
    NashvilleRealtor wrote: »
    TavistockToad wrote: »
    How tall are you OP? How did this belly pinching come about? The whole situation seems weird....

    I'm 5"1 and I weight 135 lb. I certainly don't think that he meant it in a sexual way or anything like that but it was definitely awkward and uncomfortable. The fact is that he said I was overweight and that's pretty much all you needed to say for me to start doing something about it.
    After he said I was overweight and I acknowledged it he reached for my stomach, pinched it with his hand, have it two light pulls and he said ".. You have more than you need" and that's the part that made me feel uncomfortable and awkward. I certainly have never had a doctor tug my fat before it was my first time seeing him too. I know people are going to say that I'm weak or easily offended but him going that extra step made me feel pretty bad about my stomach and confidence 😅
    Anyway it happened, it's done, and I'm doing something about it 👍👍

    Hmmm...I’m the same height as you. If you’re 135, you’re very close to a normal BMI. Agree that the doctor’s delivery wasn’t the best. Hugs to you. You came to the right place!
  • NashvilleRealtor
    NashvilleRealtor Posts: 23 Member
    try2again wrote: »
    OP, it occurred to me that you mentioned this process of losing weight seemed complicated. It's not at all, but you could probably benefit from the info found in these:

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10300331/most-helpful-posts-getting-started-must-reads#latest

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10300319/most-helpful-posts-general-health-fitness-and-diet-must-reads#latest

    Also, with so little to lose, it will (and should be) slow. You really shouldn't aim for more than .5 lb/week (a 250 calorie/day deficit). That means accuracy will be important, which you can find discussed in some of the above threads.

    I'm currently shooting for a 1,200 to 1,300 calorie in take a day. Is that a good place to start? Idk
  • estherdragonbat
    estherdragonbat Posts: 5,283 Member
    NashvilleRealtor wrote: »
    try2again wrote: »
    OP, it occurred to me that you mentioned this process of losing weight seemed complicated. It's not at all, but you could probably benefit from the info found in these:

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10300331/most-helpful-posts-getting-started-must-reads#latest

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10300319/most-helpful-posts-general-health-fitness-and-diet-must-reads#latest

    Also, with so little to lose, it will (and should be) slow. You really shouldn't aim for more than .5 lb/week (a 250 calorie/day deficit). That means accuracy will be important, which you can find discussed in some of the above threads.

    I'm currently shooting for a 1,200 to 1,300 calorie in take a day. Is that a good place to start? Idk

    If you're not exercising, at 5'1", according to https://www.calculator.net/calorie-calculator.html?ctype=standard&cage=25&csex=f&cheightfeet=5&cheightinch=1&cpound=130&cheightmeter=180&ckg=60&cactivity=1.2&printit=0&x=51&y=20, 1275 would be right around where you want to be. But it might be hard for you to stick to long-term. Although exercise isn't essential for weight loss, it does give you more calories to play with.
  • JBanx256
    JBanx256 Posts: 1,479 Member
    Devil's advocate - it was your first time seeing this particular doctor? If someone who never met me just looked at a chart and saw my height/weight, and I was standing in front of them in (for example) loose-fitting jeans and a hoodie or something, they would have no idea about my actual level of bodyfat. I am currently considered medically overweight. Although a quick pinch with the fingers is definitely lacking in tact, I can envision a legitimate reason for doing so. If my (male) doctor did that to me, I'd be mildly embarrassed for maybe 10 seconds and then would be SQUIRREL on something else.
  • Dude_It_Is_Time
    Dude_It_Is_Time Posts: 16 Member
    I’m here because it’s my 3rd time losing weight and every time I gain weight back I also get certain symptoms back. I’m tired of the symptoms and tired of the fat. And frankly I’m tired. And I know that if I work out I can get less sleep and still feel good. Also if I eat right I also feel less bloated and just lighter (internally). So I am biting the bullet rather than the cookie and starting all over again 💪
  • competeagain4x
    competeagain4x Posts: 167 Member
    It’s a D move no matter what but let it motivate you
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