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We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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He ghosted me
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I walked into her basement by mistake and let me tell you it's a scary but yet exciting place!1
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I didn't mind the shirt...but the women's panties that said "it ain't gonna spank itself" were a bit much1
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He couldn't keep up with me, always thought I was a bit much0
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All she wanted to do was go shopping0
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He kept trying to bench press me!0
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She wasn't spontaneous enough.0
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He enjoyed being spontaneous by singing the hokey pokey in every grocery store0
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She wouldn't hang out with me in the frozen foods section0
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The manager kept warning him to not hang out so much in the frozen foods section0
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She was always nipplie0
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He felt intimidated by my perky-ness0
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I was the 4 bugs she owned *shudder*0
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She started to undulate wildly anytime she heard bagpipes0
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The funky cold medina0
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His feet smelt funky.0
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She wanted me to suck on her toes. I got sock fuzz in my mouth so I had to end it. Yuck!0
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I found out he was sucking the neighbours toes, and the neighbours wife got really pissed
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She always wanted to play footsies with my privates. It was weird.0
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His fellow military privates didn't mind, he was so insecure.0
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She mistook insecurity with jealousy0
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His head wear was always nicer than mine0
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She spent more time with my hat than she did with me.0
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My hat playing was code word for inviting him over, he just didn't get it.0
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She forgot that when she invited me over, she lived 1,000 miles away...0
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He just couldn't go the distance0
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She had a funny way of measuring0
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he just didn't measure up to my standards0
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