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Adoption - Should Fat People Be Allowed to Adopt?
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nrtauthor
Posts: 159 Member
in Debate Club
This topic is inspired by the show My Big Fat Fabulous Life. The star of that show goes to an adoption agency and is told she can't adopt because her BMI is too high.
I don't know a lot about adoption in America but I know in Canada the criteria for being eligible to adopt is quite strict. You have to be a certain age (in comparison to the child), certain financial situation and married couples are higher up on the totem pole (that's just what I know from family members who wanted to adopt).
Now, initially my knee-jerk reaction to the adoption agency saying: People with this BMI aren't eligible, was: That's *kitten*.
But then I started to think about it.
We know, for a fact, that once you reach a certain level of obesity that there are significant health risks. Our society likes to preach that all bodies are beautiful (they are) and that all bodies are healthy (they aren't), but this narrative has created this denial about reality. Scientific fact is scientific fact, your feelings don't change facts.
So, if we know a certain level of obesity comes with significant health risks, and if we know BMI isn't 100% accurate but IS a good starting point (I mean when you hit a BMI of 40 and up I think it's fairly obvious if that's 'muscle' weight or fat weight) to determine where a person is at, can we really say it's unfair for adoption agencies to refuse adoption to obese people?
Wouldn't that be like handing a child over to someone we know has a lower life span and significant health issues on the horizon? Is that really the responsible thing to do for these kids?
I'm not sure. I still haven't quite figured out where I stand on the issue but what about you?
Should adoption agencies look at a person's overall health (including obesity) when considering if someone is suitable to adopt?
Or should those sort of things not matter because a loving home is more important than a stable home (health stability I mean)?
Thoughts?
I don't know a lot about adoption in America but I know in Canada the criteria for being eligible to adopt is quite strict. You have to be a certain age (in comparison to the child), certain financial situation and married couples are higher up on the totem pole (that's just what I know from family members who wanted to adopt).
Now, initially my knee-jerk reaction to the adoption agency saying: People with this BMI aren't eligible, was: That's *kitten*.
But then I started to think about it.
We know, for a fact, that once you reach a certain level of obesity that there are significant health risks. Our society likes to preach that all bodies are beautiful (they are) and that all bodies are healthy (they aren't), but this narrative has created this denial about reality. Scientific fact is scientific fact, your feelings don't change facts.
So, if we know a certain level of obesity comes with significant health risks, and if we know BMI isn't 100% accurate but IS a good starting point (I mean when you hit a BMI of 40 and up I think it's fairly obvious if that's 'muscle' weight or fat weight) to determine where a person is at, can we really say it's unfair for adoption agencies to refuse adoption to obese people?
Wouldn't that be like handing a child over to someone we know has a lower life span and significant health issues on the horizon? Is that really the responsible thing to do for these kids?
I'm not sure. I still haven't quite figured out where I stand on the issue but what about you?
Should adoption agencies look at a person's overall health (including obesity) when considering if someone is suitable to adopt?
Or should those sort of things not matter because a loving home is more important than a stable home (health stability I mean)?
Thoughts?
13
Replies
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and god forbid what if someone significantly obese wanted to adopt to have a child to wait on them? (see my 600 lb life they all have people waiting on them)38
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What was the BMI cutoff the adoption agency is using?3
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jseams1234 wrote: »What was the BMI cutoff the adoption agency is using?
I honestly don't know (I'm pregnant. Information goes in one ear and out through my aching ankles LOL so I'm not sure if they said in the show or if it wasn't mentioned). What do you think would be acceptable?5 -
Adopting and raising a child is *expensive*. I can't imagine this would be cost-effective, it would be cheaper to hire someone to just wait on you.
In any case, why would this be a concern specifically for overweight people? There are all sorts of inappropriate reasons one might adopt a child, so singling out overweight people because they potentially maybe might be really wanting a slave seems ridiculous.36 -
Are they restricting for other future potential health problems or just immediately visible and socially unapproved ones?24
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I found this..
https://abcnews.go.com/Health/story?id=2743016&page=1
... a BMI of 40 is the cutoff
“China announced plans Wednesday to tighten restrictions on adoptions by foreigners. The nation will give last priority to foreign citizens who are older than 50 and ban adoptions to those who are obese, single, disfigured or on antidepressant medication.
Stated bluntly, if you are too fat, you can't adopt a Chinese baby.”
Edit: didn’t see anything about US based adoptions - but I’m doing three things at once this morning and may have missed it.9 -
janejellyroll wrote: »Are they restricting for other future potential health problems or just immediately visible and socially unapproved ones?
From what I saw, and it was a TV show so I have no idea how accurate it was, they were restricting based entirely on potential health issues. The BMI itself was seen as a 'health problem'. From my understanding.2 -
I just thought of a question for those who, like me, had a knee-jerk 'this is wrong' reaction.
What about the health risks to the child? Because they will obviously be raised in a home where proper nutrition and eating habits aren't taught, so most likely they will also end up obese (which we know is unhealthy). I mean, we can argue that obese people eat healthy but don't we all know that's not true?
Source of opinion: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3671382/
"Another important risk factor for childhood obesity is having parents who are obese. Children with 2 obese parents are 10 to 12 times more likely to be obese."20 -
A friend of mine was turned down, because her husband was obese. They tried to go the open adoption route, and they were not chosen, and the reason was that the birth mothers that were involved did not choose them because of their weight. This is a real thing.16
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I have a friend who has an adopted son. She tells the story that when she went to get him (outside of the US) she had to buy 2 plane tickets because she is rather large. I don't think BMI should be a make or break decision.13
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My thoughts are that considering the number of children in the system who are desperately needed a safe, stable, loving home, that I can't consider it a grand idea. Our population is growing in size and besides, BMI is an estimate of chances of becoming ill - it's not necessarily a guarantee. Furthermore, even if the obese person has a higher risk of certain illness, frankly, as we age, we all become higher risk for a lot of illnesses. It's trying to predict the future.
After all, even your loving, 30 something couple with perfect health may adopt and then go on to develop cancer or die in a car accident.
And I'd much rather see a child taken in by a loving obese couple who might have health problems but who will love that child than leave that child in the system, moving from home to home and being exposed to who knows what sorts of things.40 -
janejellyroll wrote: »Are they restricting for other future potential health problems or just immediately visible and socially unapproved ones?
From what I saw, and it was a TV show so I have no idea how accurate it was, they were restricting based entirely on potential health issues. The BMI itself was seen as a 'health problem'. From my understanding.
Are they requesting family medical records to eliminate people who may have a higher risk of certain diseases or screening for things like the BRCA gene?
I realize that this post is based on a television show and you may not know the answer, but I think knowing this would determine how I felt about the overall policy. Limiting adoption due to the potential for obesity-related illness seems unfair unless it is in the context of identifying and limiting everyone with a higher risk of future health issues, not just one that is immediately visible.14 -
janejellyroll wrote: »Are they restricting for other future potential health problems or just immediately visible and socially unapproved ones?
Friends of mine who adopted said they were asked whether either of them smoked and how much alcohol they typically drink, so maybe.4 -
SuzySunshine99 wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »Are they restricting for other future potential health problems or just immediately visible and socially unapproved ones?
Friends of mine who adopted said they were asked whether either of them smoked and how much alcohol they typically drink, so maybe.
Those questions could be prompted by a concern for parental health, but it could also be motivated by concern for the environment that the child will be exposed to.12 -
janejellyroll wrote: »SuzySunshine99 wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »Are they restricting for other future potential health problems or just immediately visible and socially unapproved ones?
Friends of mine who adopted said they were asked whether either of them smoked and how much alcohol they typically drink, so maybe.
Those questions could be prompted by a concern for parental health, but it could also be motivated by concern for the environment that the child will be exposed to.
That's true. I'm not sure of the context of those questions.
My thought is that there are so many children who need loving homes. If an obese person has the means and the desire to open their home to a child, I don't think there should be restrictions based on BMI.3 -
I'm adopted. My parents were poor at the time, so assuming this would exceed the level of risk for an adoption agency by today's standards. Considering that demand vastly exceeds supply then prospective parents would do well to manage their weight.
If the option is for a child to either have obese parents or no parents, then obese parents would be preferable.
Due to the sensationalist nature of how this played out I question if this wasn't manufactured to increase the drama.25 -
I'm adopted. My parents were poor at the time, so assuming this would exceed the level of risk for an adoption agency by today's standards. Considering that demand vastly exceeds supply then prospective parents would do well to manage their weight.
If the option is for a child to either have obese parents or no parents, then obese parents would be preferable.
Due to the sensationalist nature of how this played out I question if this wasn't manufactured to increase the drama.
I don't watch that show anymore, but that was my first thought, too.8 -
Huh, didn't know this was a thing. We have several friends who are either foster parents or have adopted. Most of them are overweight/very overweight. A couple of them also have health issues (both medical and mental health). One of them is also a smoker.
It doesn't bother me that they're overweight, every day that those kids don't have to be shuffled around is a blessing. I'm in excellent health, I could die tomorrow due to all sorts of unforeseen incidents.10 -
As someone who was in the foster system as a child this is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. To deny a child in need of a loving home because the person who wants desperately to be a parent is too large in my opinion is so very wrong. This in no way protects the child. It probably puts the child at a higher risk. No child should have to live in the foster system or an orphanage. Honestly, these types of rules are made by people who have no idea what it’s actually like for the children living in those situations. 🤬43
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