What’s a red flag for you?

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Replies

  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 270,342 Member
    dodea48 wrote: »
    I thought you and caco_ethes were getting a room :)

    Me?

    Well , she is cute 😁
  • RockWarrior84
    RockWarrior84 Posts: 839 Member
    Red flag, if she doesn’t like tacos



  • Glazed_and_Confused
    Glazed_and_Confused Posts: 1,307 Member
    caco_ethes wrote: »
    If he isn’t in favor of the Oxford comma

    ny6pqm76ou19.gif
  • GymGoddessGoals
    GymGoddessGoals Posts: 2,146 Member
    @mattig89ch sorry, I wont get that message. We aren't friends (as in we arent on each others FL) so the message won't go through.
  • mattig89ch
    mattig89ch Posts: 2,648 Member
    That....might actually explain why alot of the messages I've sent have gone un-answered. @GymGoddessGoals want to be friends and continue this discussion?
  • GymGoddessGoals
    GymGoddessGoals Posts: 2,146 Member
    @mattig89ch I'm always up for a good discussion.
  • Reckoner68
    Reckoner68 Posts: 2,139 Member
    Eyes and weaknesses in the opposite gender
  • Reckoner68
    Reckoner68 Posts: 2,139 Member
    Reckoner68 wrote: »
    Eyes and weaknesses in the opposite gender

    For someone who likes eyes so much you go through some trouble to remain unseen. 😂

    It's actually been 0 trouble, literally, heheh. What's that old phrase? "Work smarter, not...well, just do less work" or something like that
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,616 Member
    I wonder how someone's red flags change over time... both as they mature but also based on current circumstances/situations.
  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,073 Member
    jjpptt2 wrote: »
    I wonder how someone's red flags change over time... both as they mature but also based on current circumstances/situations.

    Based on some of these responses, I would really hope so.
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,616 Member
    jjpptt2 wrote: »
    I wonder how someone's red flags change over time... both as they mature but also based on current circumstances/situations.

    For me, there was a time that I desperately wanted constant interaction and to be the focus and priority of another person. But I don't want that now. I'm curious how much of that is because I'm in a better place relative to my own person demons vs I have someone, I have love and companionship so it's easy to take that for granted.
  • CoffeeAndContour
    CoffeeAndContour Posts: 1,466 Member
    jjpptt2 wrote: »
    I wonder how someone's red flags change over time... both as they mature but also based on current circumstances/situations.

    I think so. I’m much more realistic of what I want and expect from a person than I was even a year ago.

    We grow, we change.
  • rickigageby
    rickigageby Posts: 149 Member
    I see people saying about wanting attention, and about how that’s a red flag. But I honestly feel like when first starting out a relationship, we all need attention for the relationship to flourish. Now after awhile the need for attention will go away.
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    Reckoner68 wrote: »
    Reckoner68 wrote: »
    Eyes and weaknesses in the opposite gender

    For someone who likes eyes so much you go through some trouble to remain unseen. 😂

    It's actually been 0 trouble, literally, heheh. What's that old phrase? "Work smarter, not...well, just do less work" or something like that

    You should be in the motivational poster business
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    Red flags for any type of relationship (not exclusive to people I date/boink/whatever):
    • Any hint at controlling behavior and I'm out - been there, done that. No thanks.
    • Having stupid opinions about women in the workplace or what the role of a woman should/shouldn't be.
    • Needy, obsessive behaviors - Wanting to spend time with me is fine, but don't pester me at my place every day, interrupt my life with your needs and wants and make them sound more important than me getting what needs to be done, done.
    • Wanting constant contact. There will be days where I don't talk to folks. Doesn't mean I hate you, just means I'm busy or I don't particularly want to talk that day.
    • Asking possessive/aggressive questions or engaging in possessive behaviors - had a guy I dated hack into my email to read my emails (from more than a year prior) and then accuse me of sleeping with people or being in love with someone else. Like, no dude.. I'm always at your place or in class, when do I have time to go bang other dudes?
    • Expecting me to *do* something. Anything. Nope. You are your own person and I am mine. If I do something for you, it's because I care about you and want to do that thing for you.
    • If they belittle or demean people either to their face or even worse if it's behind their back, I'm outtie. I don't want to be around someone like that.
    • Drama. If you attract drama of any sort.. I'm out. I ain't got time for that *kitten*.
    • Constantly being late to agreed upon plans without valid reasons. I just assume you don't give a *kitten* about our relationship, so why should I?
    • Weird, off-putting behaviors toward minors. Pretty self explanatory.
    • Having expectations that I should wear makeup or that I should present myself "nicely" at all times because I'm a woman and otherwise, I'm irredeemable without said makeup. *kitten* you, you *kitten*.

    I think with most of the behaviors and observations listed, there's this fine line. Up to that line is ooookay (sort of), but cross it and it's a whole lotta nope from most of us.

    Hugging for use of boink
  • Cutemesoon
    Cutemesoon Posts: 2,646 Member
    • Any hint at controlling behavior and I'm out
    • Having stupid opinions about women in the workplace or what the role of a woman should/shouldn't be.
    • Obsessive behaviors
    • Asking possessive/aggressive questions or engaging in possessive behaviors
    • Expecting me to *do* something. Anything. Nope. You are your own person and I am mine. If I do something for you, it's because I care about you and want to do that thing for you.
    • If they belittle or demean people
    • Drama. If you attract drama of any sort.. I'm out. I ain't got time for that
    • Having expectations that I should wear makeup or that I should present myself "nicely" at all times because I'm a woman.

    YES to all of the above!