1000 calories over target today

I don't know if it was mentioned but make sure the calories you do consume aren't empty calories. If you're eating around 2000 calories and you're still hungry then you're probably not eating what your body needs. If I ate 2000 calories of McDonald's at 12pm, by 5pm I'd be pretty damn hungry. Try eating a few eggs - in whatever form - EVERY morning, and look for other good protein-based meals; tuna, lean chicken etc.

If you like tomatoes, snack on cherry tomatoes, they're small and sweet. Add as much salad as you can do to everything you eat. Try to avoid forcing yourself to eat plain, bland food like carrot or celery sticks, unless you like them. Eating tasteless rabbit food isn't sustainable.

Research ways to enhance the taste without adding too many calories. The idea is to satiate yourself with tasty, low calorie foods, so that you can both eat more, and feel fuller too. Be sure you're not drinking calories.

I promise you, if you get it right, you'll feel fuller than you did when you were eating OVER maintenance. Your body will be fully satiated, and you won't get those cravings.

If you mess up one day, fine, that's ONE day from a potential 120+ days; nothing has been ruined.

Good luck. 👍

Been there, done that. Still losing weight. Don't lose sight of the big (skinny?) picture. Focus on what's working and forgive yourself for screw ups.

yapetron wrote: »

Thanks so much for your replies and encouragement! Lots of really useful stuff to consider.

AnnPT77 wrote: »

Log it (even if you have to estimate). Think about whether it was worthwhile, or not. If not, spend no more than 10 minutes considering why it happened, and how you might modify your plans to avoid a repeat. In that case, make a new plan, and rehearse it vividly in your mind a few times, so it'll stick. Then just go on with your healthy plan. It'll be fine. Over-goal days are learning experiences, not a reason for discouragement or guilt. Use them to improve the plan.

Guilt or any other negative feelings are 100% optional, rarely helpful, and don't feel good. I like to skip that drama, personally. Food is not sin, so it doesn't require expiation. We just need to figure out how to eat reasonable amounts of it, long term, and everything will be fine.

Love this. I did log everything I ate, which feels like a win. It definitely wasn't worthwhile, but does not feel horrible either. I think, upon reflection, that part of what set me up for eating so much was feeling like I had to stay within my calorie limit, even if I was really wanting to stress eat. So when I went over by a bit, it felt like I may as well keep going because I had already failed. For the most part, I WANT to stay within that calorie limit, but I think I need to have a plan to give myself permission to go over that limit when I want to. So permission to snack on fruits, veggies, lean protein, whatever, when I really want to, even if it sends me over my limit. The worst that will happen is that I won't lose that week, or I will have a small gain. Which is not ideal, but nothing to fear.

You're thinking these things through, in what seems like a very reflective, productive way, and keeping progress in perspective: Good stuff.

The one thing I'm keying in on here, that I didn't see you mention explicitly: ". . . feeling like I had to stay within my calorie limit, even if I was really wanting to stress eat." If (part of) the problem is stress, I'd suggest you pull that part out, and work on it. If the problem isn't hunger or nutrition, the true solution isn't food.

If part of the problem is stress, figure out how to address that explicitly. We all have stress, and there are lots of ways to manage it: Exercise, meditation, prayer, therapy, warm aromatherapy bubble baths, playing with kids or the dog, going out into nature, who knows what - different strategies work for different people. Maybe see if you can find some personally excellent stress-management methods that aren't food.

PAV8888 wrote: »

Currently we only have the following pieces of "concrete" information:

==You don't think you've achieved a large deficit according to your logging.
==Your scales suggest you DID achieve a 500 Cal a day average deficit, which is more than fast enough for someone with 20lbs to lose.

Yes, good point! I am hoping that if I track continue to track both my weight and my food accurately over the next month or so I will have a clearer idea of what my true maintenance calories actually are. Which might make me feel a lot freer to just choose to have days when I eat at maintenance when I feel like I can't handle a deficit for whatever reason. It just seems crazy that my I could eat much more than 2100 and maintain my weight! But it might be true. I am 5'6 and 154lbs, and lift at the gym (not that heavy, working on it) 3x week and walk a lot.

Knowing your maintenance calories is really helpful in that way. Any day under maintenance is progress toward goal weight.

One comment: I can eat over 2100 and maintain weight. It's admittedly a closer squeak (before exercise) in coronavirus shelter-at-home times, but it still seems to be true. I'm 5'5" (shorter), 130 pounds (nearly 25 pounds lighter), sedentary (usually around 4k steps or less) outside of intentional exercise (lately, 6 days short rowing machine pieces and 3 days short weight workout, good for just 200 or so calories) . . . and 64 years old, which I'll bet is quite a bit older. I'm admittedly a mysteriously good li'l ol' calorie burner, especially for my age, but 2100+ is certainly in the realm of possible, for you. I don't know where the myth comes from that *all* women need to eat piteously few calories in order to lose weight, but it's largely BS.

https://www.aworkoutroutine.com/1200-calorie-diet/ (I know you're not doing 1200, but the "why" of myths of low calories as a universal for women are in that article.)

yapetron wrote: »

Thanks for the comments. In general, I am drawn to eat lots of veggies and fair bit of protein! And actually, I eat eggs, or egg white oatmeal for breakfast most mornings. But I also find that if I have rules about not eating junk food then I feel like I need to eat ALL the junk food, so it's much saner for me to not make any food bad or off-limits. I wasn't really eating a lot because I felt hungry yesterday, it was because I was tired, stressed, and wanting treats. I have found sometimes that hunger is a tiny bit of an issue on 2000 calories, but I think this may because it is more of a deficit than i thought. But I agree that finding tasty low-cal things is a worthwhile skill to cultivate, and I'd love to get better at it.

Weight-in this morning: exactly the same as yesterday morning!!! Honestly shocked.

What I do notice is that I have some inflammation in my fingers and toes (happens to me when I eat a lot of dairy/sugar).

Back on track today.

I'm not going to disparage nutrient-dense foods, because I love them (so much so that I got fat in the first place while eating lots - way too much - of them ). Overall good nutrition is very important, for satiety as well as health, IMO.

But I agree that it's an excellent plan not to parse foods into "good" and "bad", and also not to 100% forbid "bad" foods we personally enjoy (as long as not truly poison, allergenic to us personally, or contraindicated by a medical condition or medication regimen, of course). For most of us, nutrition, satiety, and calorie management is all about portions and context, and even so-called "junk" foods have some nutrients.

As far as the sugar/dairy reaction: Is it definitely inflammation, or is it potentially water retention? Keep in mind that I'm saying this as an older person who's had osteoarthritis and similar things for probably a couple of decades already. Inflammation certainly increases discomfort levels and mobility. But increased water retention alone will potentially cause some stiffness, reduce mobility, and through those maybe even increase discomfort as well. If you have true food sensitivities, that would be a good thing to figure out (like through medical tests). Water retention increase, in context of a little more carbs and salt than one typically eats - even if a perfectly healthy amount of both - is just part of how a healthy body handles metabolizing foods. That would be true, even if there are side effects. (It's fine to regularlize your diet to avoid those side effects, if you choose, of course. But it's good to understand what's at play, regardless.)

I'm betting on you for good long-term results, with your moderate and reflective approach!