Rules for MFP DMs

1234689

Replies

  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    I always assume nobody wants anything 😁
  • KickassAmazon76
    KickassAmazon76 Posts: 4,537 Member
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?
  • tmantwo
    tmantwo Posts: 2,181 Member
    CacoEther wrote: »
    tmantwo wrote: »
    Rule 1... you do not talk about any DM you have with anyone with anyone else.

    Rule 2... you DO NOT talk about any DM you have with anyone with anyone else.

    What about if its a dm with anyone, can i talk about it with anyone else?

    I guess snitches get stitches?

    I won’t tell on you. You don’t tell on me.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,492 Member
    CacoEther wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    I always assume nobody wants anything 😁

    giphy.gif
  • CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?

    Where's Jesse when you need him...

    Are they hot? 🤷🏻


    Seriously though IDK. It's probably true~ish that they'll all be good with friends, but if ever given the opportunity...

    This is also something that is a matter of perspective and in no way should you take me seriously on it. I'm as lost as the next person.
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    iMago wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    can always just hit em with ol reliable beforehand

    "sorry i cut my foot earlier and my shoe is filling up with blood"

    Ice floe into the arctic ocean for you 😘❄❣

    Byyy-eee

    ...or if you flatter me some (or less? I'm confused by my thought train with your response)...you can go on an ice floe into the Antarctic ocean and observe some penguins in passing 🧡❄🐧❣


    (random point of non interest to everyone - but I have an Antarctica obsession (and people who know me assume its b/c of penguins - it isn't))

    Ice desert...no claimed country - but shared, I like that a lot

    empty, vacant, less hospitable = less people - and pretty, clean whiteness
    ...I hate being cold tho - so this is a fantasy ideal
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?

    Way i see it is you can’t control what other people want, only what you want. You don’t have to preemptively cut people off to prove you aren’t romantically interested. If they assume that you want more just because you get coffee and they’re disappointed when you don’t.. that’s their issue to work out 🤷🏼‍♀️ Coffee ain’t a contract. We women have been raised to never be a ‘tease’ but we have absolutely NO idea where that starts and stops. I like to think that people are after nothing because that’s what i’m after. I shudder to think how many of my male friends I wouldn’t have if I would’ve assumed they only befriended me with an ulterior motive. (That’s not a rebuke)
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    tmantwo wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    tmantwo wrote: »
    Rule 1... you do not talk about any DM you have with anyone with anyone else.

    Rule 2... you DO NOT talk about any DM you have with anyone with anyone else.

    What about if its a dm with anyone, can i talk about it with anyone else?

    I guess snitches get stitches?

    I won’t tell on you. You don’t tell on me.

    My philosophy is.. nobody gaf who I’m talking to anymore than I want to hear who they’re talking to 😂
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    The “ you’re cute, what’s your number....let’s chat more”

    This is what I picture:



    ( I don’t know how to post gifs 👵🏼)

    I'm now wishing I hadn't clicked the link.

    giphy.gif

    If you open that gif in a new tab and then hug it with the img tags, that works.

    This makes me want to......egad I feel like.........ugh
    I cannot unsee it now. Thanks.
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    CacoEther wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?

    Way i see it is you can’t control what other people want, only what you want. You don’t have to preemptively cut people off to prove you aren’t romantically interested. If they assume that you want more just because you get coffee and they’re disappointed when you don’t.. that’s their issue to work out 🤷🏼‍♀️ Coffee ain’t a contract. We women have been raised to never be a ‘tease’ but we have absolutely NO idea where that starts and stops. I like to think that people are after nothing because that’s what i’m after. I shudder to think how many of my male friends I wouldn’t have if I would’ve assumed they only befriended me with an ulterior motive. (That’s not a rebuke)

    That's pretty deep.

    If they offer Starbucks Mocha Latte does that mean something different? And does it matter if we only have Dunkin' locally?
  • KickassAmazon76
    KickassAmazon76 Posts: 4,537 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?

    Way i see it is you can’t control what other people want, only what you want. You don’t have to preemptively cut people off to prove you aren’t romantically interested. If they assume that you want more just because you get coffee and they’re disappointed when you don’t.. that’s their issue to work out 🤷🏼‍♀️ Coffee ain’t a contract. We women have been raised to never be a ‘tease’ but we have absolutely NO idea where that starts and stops. I like to think that people are after nothing because that’s what i’m after. I shudder to think how many of my male friends I wouldn’t have if I would’ve assumed they only befriended me with an ulterior motive. (That’s not a rebuke)

    That's pretty deep.

    If they offer Starbucks Mocha Latte does that mean something different? And does it matter if we only have Dunkin' locally?

    Does that translate equally to Tim Hortons?

    Also, @caco_ethes... I love your perspective on this. Thank you!
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    edited January 2021
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Establish your motives for the conversation early.

    Don’t beat around the bush.

    If you don’t care enough to make nude gifs, are you even trying?

    If you send @CacoEther a static nude she will play connect the dots with any moles and/or birthmarks to spell out Emily Dickinson poems.

    Be bold!

    What are you looking at Swan

    Edit: Hi! 😁
  • KickassAmazon76
    KickassAmazon76 Posts: 4,537 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?

    Way i see it is you can’t control what other people want, only what you want. You don’t have to preemptively cut people off to prove you aren’t romantically interested. If they assume that you want more just because you get coffee and they’re disappointed when you don’t.. that’s their issue to work out 🤷🏼‍♀️ Coffee ain’t a contract. We women have been raised to never be a ‘tease’ but we have absolutely NO idea where that starts and stops. I like to think that people are after nothing because that’s what i’m after. I shudder to think how many of my male friends I wouldn’t have if I would’ve assumed they only befriended me with an ulterior motive. (That’s not a rebuke)

    That's pretty deep.

    If they offer Starbucks Mocha Latte does that mean something different? And does it matter if we only have Dunkin' locally?

    Does that translate equally to Tim Hortons?

    Also, @caco_ethes... I love your perspective on this. Thank you!

    I totally tagged the wrong caco!
    . Sorry @cacoether
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?

    Way i see it is you can’t control what other people want, only what you want. You don’t have to preemptively cut people off to prove you aren’t romantically interested. If they assume that you want more just because you get coffee and they’re disappointed when you don’t.. that’s their issue to work out 🤷🏼‍♀️ Coffee ain’t a contract. We women have been raised to never be a ‘tease’ but we have absolutely NO idea where that starts and stops. I like to think that people are after nothing because that’s what i’m after. I shudder to think how many of my male friends I wouldn’t have if I would’ve assumed they only befriended me with an ulterior motive. (That’s not a rebuke)

    That's pretty deep.

    If they offer Starbucks Mocha Latte does that mean something different? And does it matter if we only have Dunkin' locally?

    Starbucks mocha latte means you’re payin

    Dunkin means you’re gettin sick later 😆
  • CacoEther
    CacoEther Posts: 2,465 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?

    Way i see it is you can’t control what other people want, only what you want. You don’t have to preemptively cut people off to prove you aren’t romantically interested. If they assume that you want more just because you get coffee and they’re disappointed when you don’t.. that’s their issue to work out 🤷🏼‍♀️ Coffee ain’t a contract. We women have been raised to never be a ‘tease’ but we have absolutely NO idea where that starts and stops. I like to think that people are after nothing because that’s what i’m after. I shudder to think how many of my male friends I wouldn’t have if I would’ve assumed they only befriended me with an ulterior motive. (That’s not a rebuke)

    That's pretty deep.

    If they offer Starbucks Mocha Latte does that mean something different? And does it matter if we only have Dunkin' locally?

    Does that translate equally to Tim Hortons?

    Also, @caco_ethes... I love your perspective on this. Thank you!

    I totally tagged the wrong caco!
    . Sorry @cacoether

    The proper tag doesn’t work anyway 😩
  • KickassAmazon76
    KickassAmazon76 Posts: 4,537 Member
    edited January 2021
    CacoEther wrote: »
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    CacoEther wrote: »
    I feel like the pandemic has provided add’l ghosting opportunities. Your last message can include something as simple as “i’m fine mostly, i just have this dry cough”

    Hahahahaha!

    I may have used it as a reason why I can't go for coffee... A few times.

    I never know if they legit want coffee, or if I should just assume they want more. Sigh.

    Everyone wants more. Are they down to sit through coffee and such along the way is the real question.

    So then if I know I don't want more, do I decline coffee? Even if they claim friends?

    Way i see it is you can’t control what other people want, only what you want. You don’t have to preemptively cut people off to prove you aren’t romantically interested. If they assume that you want more just because you get coffee and they’re disappointed when you don’t.. that’s their issue to work out 🤷🏼‍♀️ Coffee ain’t a contract. We women have been raised to never be a ‘tease’ but we have absolutely NO idea where that starts and stops. I like to think that people are after nothing because that’s what i’m after. I shudder to think how many of my male friends I wouldn’t have if I would’ve assumed they only befriended me with an ulterior motive. (That’s not a rebuke)

    That's pretty deep.

    If they offer Starbucks Mocha Latte does that mean something different? And does it matter if we only have Dunkin' locally?

    Does that translate equally to Tim Hortons?

    Also, @caco_ethes... I love your perspective on this. Thank you!

    I totally tagged the wrong caco!
    . Sorry @cacoether

    The proper tag doesn’t work anyway 😩

    It's quite funny... Because I've done it before. And in my head, I think your user name, and then I go to tag you and I'm like. Doh! I keep saying it wrong! It's ethes!

    *smh* some days I feel so slow. 😂

    On an aside (just in case) did the "notify me when people mention me" checkbox get turned off under notifications?
  • yasminekassis613
    yasminekassis613 Posts: 268 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    A few weeks ago I got a friend request from a woman who I had never interacted with and never seen on the forums. So to get over that awkward "new friend but I don't even know them" feeling, I sent a DM saying "hello, nice to meet you, thanks for the request"... all that smooth jazz. The next day I noticed they unfriended me. It was at that moment that I realized... oh, y'all some weirdos on here. 😅

    I tried friending people when I first came on MFP, but realized 2 things. 1) I'm a terrible friend. :( 2) They were terrible friends. :(

    I've also tried messaging people but was told, if they're not friends, they won't get it?
    I have a bunch of wonderful people that have sent me friend invites but because I know I'd be a terrible friend, I still have them sitting there unanswered. :( Plus I have this paranoid personality trait that convinces me if they got to know me they wouldn't like me and then reject me. Then I'd feel *really* terrible.
    So anyways, have no clue if this even relates to the topic at hand but I guess I don't care. :)

    Next......


    Oh gosh, this used to be me. Once in a blue moon still is at times I guess.
    But as the years go by I have more of a “screw it” mentality.
    Most of my friends are as equally as poopy as me and it’s great because there are no expectations/ pressure. When we talk we talk, when we don’t we don’t. And I have a few that really put the effort into keeping in touch allll the dang time. Which I appreciate too, because it helps keep me in check and challenges me. People come and go. Never worry about being rejected because it’s totally ok not to click with everyone. The only way to find that out is by giving them and yourself a tiny chance. But it’s ok if you don’t want to too. You just gotta do you, and the right people will stick and the others, well.. they will just find other’s like minded.

    💕💕