We broke up because...
Replies
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Constantly lied about all the naked, handcuffed people in the closet! She doesn’t have hands but it’s amazing what she can do with those claws!1
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Wanted me to wear her red lipstick.0
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Caught him wearing my red lipstick.. it matched the underwear of mine he was wearing at the time1
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She kept putting her underwear in my draw.1
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I found hidden drawings of his Ex's underwear. 😲0
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Didn’t like the paper undergarments I made her. She said they ripped too easily. Hellooo that’s the whole point. 🙄😂0
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She was stealing my Comedy Spotlight! 😥0
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She always put me under the spot light.. 😎🦯0
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Taste in coffee was just to bad!0
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He wouldn't let me drink anything but coffee1
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Drank like a fish out of the water 🍻🍺🥃🍸🍹🍷🍾 like there’s a pandem- oh wait.. nvm. Call me.😬1
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Her baking made me gain 200 pounds.1
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He’d only speak to me if I was in revealing costume. 😒0
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I'm just a peasant. 😞0
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His typos caused him to be eaten. 🍗0
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Caught her eating some dude.0
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Laffs at my spelling 😱0
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He got eaten.0
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She seems very whatever about someone being eaten.0
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He wouldn't eat my Meatloaf just because I named it Dan 🙄0
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She was always dreaming of eating others0
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He was always mixing up dreams with reality 🍖
Who's hungry? 😋0 -
She was just so Fantastic that I was intimidated!0
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Hated that I was a Super Hero 😁😉0
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She wouldn’t take her Wonder Woman costume off even to go to funerals.1
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Her idea of a good night out was attending random funerals of people we didn’t even know.1
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She wasn’t adventurous and didn’t like FREE food! I still say it’s just like a regular buffet!1
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When she said free food.. omg.. she meant people.. 🧟♀️0
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Neverrrrr.. handcuffs and basement for him1
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I found her basement collection 😲0
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