What nobody tells you about losing weight
Replies
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How great it feels to wear baggy jeans that you could not even squeeze into a few weeks before.19
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DussyHoppers wrote: »How great it feels to wear baggy jeans that you could not even squeeze into a few weeks before.
I am SOOOOOO looking forward to this!7 -
Serious for a second:
- Realizing that it wasn't my weight that was making me unhappy. There was something broken in my head. Once I fixed that, I was able to start losing the weight. I had to learn to love myself so that I could lose weight, instead of losing weight so that I could love myself.
^^^ Not my words^^^^
But yes!! I completely agree
YES YES YES my brain was completely disconnected from my body. Fixing my brain has been a long process but has netted me such improvements in my diet and relationship with food. I never ate because I was hungry, I didn't allow my body to feel hunger. I had to learn hunger and satiety cues all over again.9 -
azalea4175 wrote: »Serious for a second:
- Realizing that it wasn't my weight that was making me unhappy. There was something broken in my head. Once I fixed that, I was able to start losing the weight. I had to learn to love myself so that I could lose weight, instead of losing weight so that I could love myself.
^^^ Not my words^^^^
But yes!! I completely agree
YES YES YES my brain was completely disconnected from my body. Fixing my brain has been a long process but has netted me such improvements in my diet and relationship with food. I never ate because I was hungry, I didn't allow my body to feel hunger. I had to learn hunger and satiety cues all over again.
I went to therapy to learn that other's issues were not my problem since I used food to sedate my sadness and shame. In the past year I have lost 77 pounds and am working on self identity and emotional regulation skills because I have always thought of myself as a fat, lazy, incompetent slob. It saddens me to realize how long that I have held on to those words to describe myself. There is a great thread in the Maintainers forum called "Immediate Gratification" that really resonated with me. It is worth reading.15 -
@BrightEyedAgain , thank you for writing your insightful post. I have found that every word that you wrote is the truth. Wishing you much success in your health journey and discovering your new self identity.4
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Well, after some seriously great posts, I’m just going to stop by long enough to be crass and shallow and say, no one ever told me I’d be able to wear horizontal stripes.
And rock them.
👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻28 -
How your relationship with safety pins will change:
I used to never have enough safety pins around. I needed them to pin dresses shirts and blouses that buttoned up in the front to prevent the dreaded "gaposis". Now, my only use for safety pins is to pin my race bib to my shirt on race days.26 -
That it might take a while to start dropping sizes, but once you do it will be rapid and kind of annoying.
It's the onion thing, I think. The bigger around you are the more fat loss it takes to influence your size. The smaller you get the faster it happens.16 -
wunderkindking wrote: »That it might take a while to start dropping sizes, but once you do it will be rapid and kind of annoying.
It's the onion thing, I think. The bigger around you are the more fat loss it takes to influence your size. The smaller you get the faster it happens.
This is my hope! I am down 11 pounds and have not dropped any sizes yet, but am most definitely looking forward to it!14 -
How your relationship with safety pins will change:
I used to never have enough safety pins around. I needed them to pin dresses shirts and blouses that buttoned up in the front to prevent the dreaded "gaposis". Now, my only use for safety pins is to pin my race bib to my shirt on race days.
As a short person, safety pins are my "emergency hem" holders for pants...6 -
That I'd be able to get out of the car much easier.
I drive a mid-sized sedan and struggled to get out of it at my heaviest. I dreaded having someone park next to me because I wanted the door opened ALL THE WAY before I climbed inside. Now that I'm half way to my goal weight I can effortlessly and gracefully climb inside my car without holding onto the car for dear life. I can't wait to see how it feels once I reach my goal!32 -
How your body changes in strange ways - who knew armpits were supposed to go in! I've had to learn to shave again
Coccyx makes sitting uncomfortable - had to buy a cushion for work seat
the cold - my whole family takes the micky now coz I used to be hot all the time.
How much better you feel overall - just so much better
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Since this thread is really long, this may have been said already, but after losing a LOT of weight it's hilarious and sad how many people will ask you if you're sick or tell others behind your back that you must be using drugs or having an affair.
It has been 19 years since I lost an initial 120 lbs (still down about 100 of those 120, because we need just a little more meat on our bones when we get older) and so many people assumed it had to be something negative going on in my life and totally discredited all the hard work and sacrifice it took to intentionally do that.
It's also a blessing and a curse to realize that you were never really "big boned" like you told yourself and others for all those years. After losing weight, I realized that I actually have a very small bone structure and was just lying to myself and making excuses for the way I looked before.29 -
NicolaCross2 wrote: »That sustainable weight loss is slow and steady. All these adverts for apps and programs that promise to get you to lose 10lb a week or whatever, make you really demotivated when you look at the scale and you've "only" lost 0.5lb. One you stop expecting huge losses you start to focus on the long term and stop losing motivation when you don't see them.
Also, well meaning friends will always tell you that you don't need to lose weight as if they think you're only trying to because you hate yourself and they want to make you feel better. I heard a great quote once that I tell them - "I don't workout because I hate my body, I workout because I love my body" and I think it's great because it helps you to focus on why you're losing weight. Because I love and respect my body and want it to be as healthy as it can be, not because I hate myself. When you think more positively, it really helps keep the motivation up.
AMEN!! I dropped 120 lbs in 9 months using a low carb plan. That was way too fast, and when I got pregnant a few months after reaching my goal and started eating carbs again, I gained back exactly half of that weight, because I went from being far too restrictive to no restriction at all.7 -
That your hormones as a female can get out of whack from losing weight. My long term pms'ing and random in between bleeding is not a lot of fun, but my obgyn told me everything looks normal and healthy so I just have to hope it'll get back to normal at some point. No clue if anyone else has experienced this?
Actually had the opposite happen. Being obese, I was never regular. I would go sometimes 8 to 9 months in between periods. Tried for 8 years to get pregnant. Hit my goal weight in November, got my cycle lined out, and found out I was pregnant in May. That was the ABSOLUTE best part of losing weight. If I hadn't, I might never have had my two awesome kids.23 -
That it would make my wife self-conscious.
We've been together for 28 years; I was a gym rat & in really good shape shape when we first got together (at 23) but I ballooned to almost 240 lbs by our 15th year together. 13 years ago I dropped 60 lbs - and have kept it off ever since. I work out regularly and watch what I eat, and it irritates her sometimes. She's always saying things like "well guess I'm the fat one now," and "you're just trying to make me feel guilty" about not working out.
She has always been slim, but as we got older (I'm 52, she's 53) she's no longer 105 lbs; she's about 130 now. Not overweight, but she's constantly comparing herself to when she was in her late 20s.
She has straight up told me that I obsess over staying in shape, but I want to keep it up until my body cant handle it anymore!
Her brother gave her crap recently, told her "For years YOU were the hot one! You better get on it if you want hang onto him!" Which is ridiculous, but didn't help.24 -
wonderingfab wrote: »That losing weight would be relatively easy but then I would feel unable to decide on a strategy to keep the weight off long term. Losing weight feels safe, going into, or towards, maintenance feels like such a risky decision! And then, I do not know how I'll ever be able to keep the weight off once I go back to my "normal" job and half the year, I'll eat 3 meals a day in restaurants
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I do love feeling healthy and having a healthy BMI though
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You will do it!!
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cyaneverfat wrote: »How much you can eat or what you can eat, and still lose weight or maintain it. Everyone is constantly questioning my choices which is super annoying. I'm tempted to start a thread about it, unless someone has a link to one?
My mom said to my doctor, "it's like she's living in two seperate worlds, one where she wants to lose weight and be super healthy, and the other where if she exercises she gets to eat McDonalds." She can't have it both ways. Umm actually I can?
I once said that is why I have an accountability person to work with, so no one else needs to watch what I eat or need to ask me questions etc. I also have said I can have anything I want, just not everything is beneficial. I have to be careful who I talk to about what I am doing in all areas of life. If that does not work, I do have to distance, or not eat meals around them etc.
And yeah, you can have it both ways!!
Some people really need to think about their own lives a lot more.5 -
BrightEyedAgain wrote: »Nobody told me how much of this journey is about facing fear and not letting it stop you. Fear of what it will mean to be thin, fear of failure, fear of change, fear of the gym, fear of looking stupid, fear of other people's responses, fear of injury, fear of being strong, fear of saying no. All these fears I didn't even know I had are now coming up along with memories/emotions from years back that I thought I'd already dealt with.
I'm only 11 lbs down so far, but I already feel like a new person because of all the fears I've had to face and conquer just to DO this thing--especially the strength/fitness part. I've realized that most of my weight issues are really IDENTITY issues, and that a lot of what I'm doing is breaking off old agreements with family/friends to be a certain way. Now I'm finding out who I really am, one workout and one logged meal at a time, and it's incredible. I never ever want to go back to living with all those fears. Not ever.
As awesome as the weight loss is, discovering my true self is even better. Now I'm just eager to see what that person's body ends up looking like because I honestly don't know!! I've yo-yo'd weight before with various methods, but I've never logged calories and tracked macros. And I've nevered combined diet with consistent strength training/exercise. The combination is already producing VERY different results than I've seen before--both physical and mental. For the first time in my life, I'm starting to believe that I could be an honest-to-goodness ATHLETE, like nothing's off the table if I'm willing to work for it. And for once, I don't mind not being good at things initially because I know I will get better. And that maybe this really WILL be the final time I have to lose this weight. This is an inner shift I've never felt before, and I'm so excited to see my future unfold!!
Somebody around here said there comes a point where you're just READY to lose the weight, and I think I'm there. Reading this and the other MFP threads has helped me a lot, and I know that will continue. So thank you all for posting. It really does matter.
Yes! This! I started my weight loss journey in January, 2020. I cannot even begin to tell you how my fear of loose skin, aging myself, saying goodbye to my beautiful wardrobe, and not enjoying beer every evening delayed my weight loss. For years. After a health scare and a shocking number on the scale, I had enough. I have lost 86lbs and I'm finding my true self. I ended up in therapy in the midst of my weight loss journey as I had so many conflicting things playing through my head. Dealing with other people's comments, reactions, etc. was enlightening and disappointing in some instances. On one hand, I was feeling better, looking better, my marriage was at its best, and I had a sense of empowerment. On the other, I felt stressed, disappointed by some relatives reactions to my journey, and realized I wasn't going to suddenly be 'happy' after dropping so much weight. My favorite coping mechanisms i.e. junk food and alcohol were no longer part of my daily life. My therapist said, you have lived a lot of your life in crisis mode and you need to find productive ways to cope with your feelings, work stress, etc. I have found walking, stress tapping (yes, really), reading and baths help my inner demons. That said, I still get stuck in varying emotions, mostly anxiety. In those times, I remind myself to be intentional with my thoughts and to breathe through it.22 -
BrightEyedAgain wrote: »Nobody told me how much of this journey is about facing fear and not letting it stop you. Fear of what it will mean to be thin, fear of failure, fear of change, fear of the gym, fear of looking stupid, fear of other people's responses, fear of injury, fear of being strong, fear of saying no. All these fears I didn't even know I had are now coming up along with memories/emotions from years back that I thought I'd already dealt with.
I'm only 11 lbs down so far, but I already feel like a new person because of all the fears I've had to face and conquer just to DO this thing--especially the strength/fitness part. I've realized that most of my weight issues are really IDENTITY issues, and that a lot of what I'm doing is breaking off old agreements with family/friends to be a certain way. Now I'm finding out who I really am, one workout and one logged meal at a time, and it's incredible. I never ever want to go back to living with all those fears. Not ever.
As awesome as the weight loss is, discovering my true self is even better. Now I'm just eager to see what that person's body ends up looking like because I honestly don't know!! I've yo-yo'd weight before with various methods, but I've never logged calories and tracked macros. And I've nevered combined diet with consistent strength training/exercise. The combination is already producing VERY different results than I've seen before--both physical and mental. For the first time in my life, I'm starting to believe that I could be an honest-to-goodness ATHLETE, like nothing's off the table if I'm willing to work for it. And for once, I don't mind not being good at things initially because I know I will get better. And that maybe this really WILL be the final time I have to lose this weight. This is an inner shift I've never felt before, and I'm so excited to see my future unfold!!
Somebody around here said there comes a point where you're just READY to lose the weight, and I think I'm there. Reading this and the other MFP threads has helped me a lot, and I know that will continue. So thank you all for posting. It really does matter.
This post really has made me think about myself. I have fears too, and I've just never really realized how much of a factor they are in my self-sabotaging of my progress. Thank you for posting. You expressed your/my experience well. 😁 Now that I have a little more insight about my fears (just realizing I have them is progress!) hopefully I can take on some new mental strategies to combat the self-sabotaging behavior.7 -
Harder and longer to lose weight as you get older. I've gotten to my goal twice before and have the confidence to get there...yet I can't go at the pace I did previously. The body can't take the extreme so I no must go at it from a different angle.8
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That sitting on hard surfaces is a lot less comfortable without all that extra natural padding.
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How your stomach changes when it gets muscles! I'm always poking myself in the stomach because I am amazed it is so taught!
I still have 19lbs to go but 31lbs has made a lot of difference!19 -
No one tells you your belly button will become a reservoir.
Every time you think you’ve dried off, you look down and there’s another little trickle coming out.
I didn’t used to have a belly button!!!14 -
Now that there is less fat surrounding my belly button I can actually see it and less lint and crud gets stuck in there.8
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Then eventually you get enough loose skin and it vanishes.again....12
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wunderkindking wrote: »Then eventually you get enough loose skin and it vanishes.again....
Nice new profile pic!!!!
The stomach vacuum that @ninerbuff discussed really has helped me.
He suggested pulling in your stomach as tightly as possible and holding for two or three minutes, while trying to maintain the best possible posture.
I started doing it as I walked, trying to pull "belly button to spine" as the say in Pilates for as long as I could (until I get distracted and forget!).
I can see a noticeable difference in loose belly skin after a couple months.15 -
Your shoes may no longer fit.
Don't be too quick to resize your wedding bands, most jewelers won't do it more than twice.
Find and make friends with your local consignment shop, don't splurge too much on clothes until you reach (and have stayed for a while at) goal.
Some of your friends and family members will not be supportive.
It's not a linear process (especially for us girls)! Some days/weeks you will not lose anything and that's okay. Stick to your plan.
I shop mostly at second hand stores. If you are choosey, you can get nice things for not a lot of money.8 -
GamerGranny wrote: »Your shoes may no longer fit.
Don't be too quick to resize your wedding bands, most jewelers won't do it more than twice.
Find and make friends with your local consignment shop, don't splurge too much on clothes until you reach (and have stayed for a while at) goal.
Some of your friends and family members will not be supportive.
It's not a linear process (especially for us girls)! Some days/weeks you will not lose anything and that's okay. Stick to your plan.
I shop mostly at second hand stores. If you are choosey, you can get nice things for not a lot of money.
Also poshmark is good.
I have done that a LOT with pants. Shirts I can wear baggy. Pants? Even my leggings would be around my ankles and there is only so sloppy I am willing to be! second hand is the way to go for this and you can return what no longer fits when you're done -
Which I need to do again, actually.6 -
springlering62 wrote: »wunderkindking wrote: »Then eventually you get enough loose skin and it vanishes.again....
Nice new profile pic!!!!
The stomach vacuum that @ninerbuff discussed really has helped me.
He suggested pulling in your stomach as tightly as possible and holding for two or three minutes, while trying to maintain the best possible posture.
I started doing it as I walked, trying to pull "belly button to spine" as the say in Pilates for as long as I could (until I get distracted and forget!).
I can see a noticeable difference in loose belly skin after a couple months.
I am definitely going to start doing that. and thank you!5
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