We broke up because...

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1…40044005400740094010…4041

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  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
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    I found out that she and her Lover @NVintage set me up for Murdering NVintage's Ex.
    I guess they killed two birds with one stone. 🙁
  • Ironwoman1111
    Ironwoman1111 Posts: 3,913 Member
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    She’d walk around the house flapping her wings because she thinks she’s a flamingo 🦩👀
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  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
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    She's just jealous that I won world record for standing on one leg for 83 hours. 🤷🏼‍♀️
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,847 Member
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    She made me stand behind her for 83 hours in case she fell. No food, no potty breaks, nothing!
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,451 Member
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    Couldn't hold 83 hours for potty break.. weak kidneys
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
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    Was always sharing my Medical history with Strangers 🙁
  • Ironwoman1111
    Ironwoman1111 Posts: 3,913 Member
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    She always acted like she was part of the cast in a telenovela. She would randomly yell out “No, no, no!” and “Ay Dios Mío!”

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  • cmsienk
    cmsienk Posts: 18,071 Member
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    She confused our life together with the Sitcom 'Friends'. Kept calling me Monica and asking when Joey and Chandler were coming over.
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,847 Member
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    She thought we were sisters from Full House. I was Michelle and she was Stephanie. I got tired of her calling police to report DJ missing.
  • Onerom1
    Onerom1 Posts: 355 Member
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    Because she said her pet goldfish came first in everything she did. I had to take the backseat in second place to a goldfish from Walmart
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
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    He was a Snob and put me down for shopping at Wally World! He says that the only department store he'll step foot in is 'Tärɡət.
    I didn't have the heart to tell him it was pronounced Tar-get!
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,847 Member
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    She wore her pajamas into Target. I was mortified! Apparently she didn’t realize we dress up for Tärɡət.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,451 Member
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    Rolled her eyes at me one too many times 😑
  • SweetDisturbanceTx
    SweetDisturbanceTx Posts: 164 Member
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    Called me by the wrong name…repeatedly
  • happimess01
    happimess01 Posts: 9,071 Member
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    Wanted me to go blonde as well
  • Ironwoman1111
    Ironwoman1111 Posts: 3,913 Member
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    When we went to the home makeover show I thought he meant it was for our house, but that’s where he met his second wife. Yeah, he got me a sister-wife!😤
  • Sharsou
    Sharsou Posts: 8,844 Member
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    I loved her unconditionally and she loved me coz of my big house 😉
  • Ironwoman1111
    Ironwoman1111 Posts: 3,913 Member
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    He surprised me with his big house! He’d found some empty fridge boxes behind Costco, duct taped them together and voila! Home sweet home!😦 📦
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,313 Member
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    Dump me for a torso.. 😱
  • sandejones
    sandejones Posts: 1,840 Member
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    He kept saying his mothers cooking was better.

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