What nobody tells you about losing weight
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Probably already said at some point but putting on socks and shoes and tying them has become so much easier. I don't have to kill myself bending over or grab my pant leg to get it up on my knee to accomplish this task. Also bending over to reach the bottom of my top load washing machine! I always blamed it on my 5'4" height challenges, but with less of a stomach it's easier to reach that last little thing in the bottom of the washer! LOL!9
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Crochetluvr wrote: »It's not a shame or a failure if you lose the weight but then gain it back years later...its just a part of being human. You can always lose it again. That's what I am doing now.
Right there with you sister! When I travel or have frequent family events surrounding food, its super hard to track correctly...so I do my best and when I get home if I've gained, I just start again. That's the beauty of it. You are allowed to get back on the horse no matter how many times you are bucked off. You are allowed to forgive yourself and keep moving forward!
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I'm a returnee also, basically starting (8 pounds down) with lots to go. Am reading this whole thread, 5 pages a day, as motivation, and for insights from others. 2023 is gonna be a great year, and 2024 even better when I get into maintenance. Off to not eat the ice cream I tracked as a snack tonight (so really off to change my tracker), cuz I just don't want it tonight. Happy holidays everyone!8
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totally agree... seems like losing weight is so emotional for people. they can't be happy with their success.. they complain about being thinner and how the world sees them now.. and they weren't happy before either. Maybe a mental attitude change is more important and learning how to be gracious kind..and see ones self in a balanced mental health state.LiveOnceBeHappy wrote: »Dianedoessmiles1 wrote: »bojaantje3822 wrote: »I prefer no comments at all on my body or weight loss but I can accept them from my mum and sister and from people I've known for at least 6 months who are themselves fat or used to be fat. Everyone else is a hard no, it makes me feel awful. And it can't be "you look good" either. It can only be "hey, you look slimmer/thinner" and "I see the lines of your muscles now!".
"You look good" just tells me you're fatphobic because you didn't tell me I looked good when I was gaining weight and reached this number so you just hated the way I looked when I was fatter more than you hate the way I look now. I liked the way most of me looked at my heaviest and the one thing I didn't like was also there when I was only 5kg overweight.
Here's my response because I felt it was an insult and yet a compliment when they say "You look good"
"You mean I didn't look good before?"
It stops them,, they usually stammer a little bit (I do it with such a great smile that's welcoming though at first first I'd CRINGE, but I am used to it now). They do go on to say some odd stuff, but after that they are still my friend, family and I realize I've done a GREAT JOB!! It has taken me time to get used to who I am now.
That sounds mean to me. They're trying to be nice and acknowledge that they notice a difference in your appearance that they hope is on purpose (and not due to illness). To make them stammer is just mean. People who comment are damned if they do comment and damned by others if they don't comment. What are humans supposed to do to be kind?
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kgb6days wrote: »
How cold you get without a thick pad of insulation
I am going to freeze to death this winter. Always cold. Even hate going to the grocery store, even in summer, I need a coat4 -
elisa123gal wrote: »totally agree... seems like losing weight is so emotional for people. they can't be happy with their success.. they complain about being thinner and how the world sees them now.. and they weren't happy before either. Maybe a mental attitude change is more important and learning how to be gracious kind..and see ones self in a balanced mental health state.LiveOnceBeHappy wrote: »Dianedoessmiles1 wrote: »bojaantje3822 wrote: »I prefer no comments at all on my body or weight loss but I can accept them from my mum and sister and from people I've known for at least 6 months who are themselves fat or used to be fat. Everyone else is a hard no, it makes me feel awful. And it can't be "you look good" either. It can only be "hey, you look slimmer/thinner" and "I see the lines of your muscles now!".
"You look good" just tells me you're fatphobic because you didn't tell me I looked good when I was gaining weight and reached this number so you just hated the way I looked when I was fatter more than you hate the way I look now. I liked the way most of me looked at my heaviest and the one thing I didn't like was also there when I was only 5kg overweight.
Here's my response because I felt it was an insult and yet a compliment when they say "You look good"
"You mean I didn't look good before?"
It stops them,, they usually stammer a little bit (I do it with such a great smile that's welcoming though at first first I'd CRINGE, but I am used to it now). They do go on to say some odd stuff, but after that they are still my friend, family and I realize I've done a GREAT JOB!! It has taken me time to get used to who I am now.
That sounds mean to me. They're trying to be nice and acknowledge that they notice a difference in your appearance that they hope is on purpose (and not due to illness). To make them stammer is just mean. People who comment are damned if they do comment and damned by others if they don't comment. What are humans supposed to do to be kind?
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How much loose and saggy skin you have that used to be padded out with fat. What do you do about that? And why does no-one mention it, even on here?
For some people, it becomes so much that it becomes a medical issue. They should talk to a doctor about it. In my case, it is significant but not life-changing, so I see it simply as part of my life's journey and a reminder of the effort that went into losing weight. If anything, it is extra motivation to keep the weight off. I don't want that loose skin to be filled again.
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Over the years I have had nurse practitioners come in and diagnose me with different medications to help with my heart, kidney, gout, type 2 diabetes and the list goes on. I have had my fill of going to hospitals. One day my mom saw me in the hospital at this point I had a cellulitis infection on top of gout. and told me I am going to set you up with a doctor who is going to help clear all this up ( he is a real M.D.) when he saw me a few days later, if I had not made changes I would not last for another 5-6 months. (at this point I am 400 lbs) He took me off 30 different medications and took off 40-45 water weight. For the first time, I was able to see my toes without my belly being in the way, and walking without a powerchair, or walker. You should have been there when I walked into the church without any of these aides. HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN!!!
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I definitely don't handle cold temps like I used to. I've lost all my insulation.
Think how much the Summer Heat is easier to tolerate! I used to get yeast infections by August because of all the sweets and carbs I used to eat. Yeast loves to survive and grow on sugar and heat! I don't get them anymore.13 -
Both good and bad things. For me:
-always being cold
-shoes fitting better or getting too big
-seeing/feeling bones you hadn't seen in ages
-excess skin, for me around the belly and my face sags a bit. Also RIP my boobs
-people are less judgy when I eat junk food. I used to hate eating unhealthy food in front of others, I always felt they were judging me, and I'm sure they sometimes were
-having waaaaaaay more clothing options
-exercising becomes so much easier
-I'm so used to eating healthy (especially lots of fruit and vegetables) that if I go a couple of days without much fruit or vegetables, my body craves them so much
All in all, I am happier at a healthier size, but losing weight on its own won't make you happy or have good self-esteem, it's equally about having a healthy mind and finding what works for you.20 -
Re: being cold. A couple things to try: you might want to do a little more aerobic activity, and you might need more iron, you might want to bump up your oil intake more than usual.
I have to take a ton of iron due to fibroid issues and even though I am at around 130 lbs down I don't get cold like I might. But anemia can happen when working out (no I don't understand why either) and if you have lost a significant amount of weight, there is nothing wrong with looking at your nutrition for deficiencies. Just because you are eating veggies and good meats with the proper carbs, might not be enough now that you might be more active! Also, my extremely thin God-daughter eats a high amount of oil and thinks that is why we are rarely cold. I think I eat a normal amount of oil, like I haven't bumped it up, but that is also a possibility.
I can't say it will help, but it might. Also, if you have possible anemia as a person who has to take a lot of iron I would say skip the herbal iron, it just makes you nauseated and constipated. Try to find some nice heme or haeme iron... aka, deer blood or cow blood iron. Lols, I am a deer vampire!!!!!!!!! Poor Bambi, thank you for your sacrifice cuz I need it.10 -
Thewonderofitall wrote: »How much loose and saggy skin you have that used to be padded out with fat. What do you do about that? And why does no-one mention it, even on here?
I've been taking Collagen since losing 85 pounds and it seems to be working for me. Of course I have also been doing a ton of aerobic exercises and activities to go along with it. I appear to be reabsorbing my saggy skin!
I get this at Costco:
Thanks for this! I appreciate it. I'm back starting, yet again, to lose some weight. To get to a weight that's in a "normal" range, I'd have to lose 180 pounds. I don't think I'll ever be that thin again, so I'm not worried about that. I lost over 50 pounds with MFP and the loose skin was what got to me. And I slowly regained. I've been at my current weight since about 2020, and not happy about that. Thanks for this info, maybe if I can take this Collagen and up my steps I can keep the saggy skin at bay! I also plan to buy compression shorts to help keep things in place as I lose. Thanks so much, and congratulations on your weight loss and good health!!
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Your male body part actually appears larger.9
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The "good job" I got when I got my full workup physical bloodwork results back. THAT is the real reason I started this, to get healthier. It's working great, the rest, looking good in clothes again, more energy, sleeping better, and even less inflammation is a wonderful addition to being healthy and having the test results to validate my effort.15
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that 90% of weight loss leaves the body thru the breath.12
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8 pounds into my 56 pound journey and I have to say- I wasn't expecting support. In fact, I was expecting the opposite. I know others have mentioned that losing weight is as much of a mental game as it is a physical one and I *thought* I understood that. I am quickly discovering that a lot of my excuses aren't actually mine. They are my exe's. It isn't that I don't have time to work out because I have to watch the kids, it was that I didn't have time to work out because he wasn't willing to watch the kids for a little bit. I am remarried now, and the man that I am with is fantastic-and helps drown out the voice that still echoes in the back of my head. I have been getting up extra early in the morning (0341 this morning) so that I can get into the gym at work. This means that I go to bed a little early as well. I posted on my snapstory today, and he didn't complain about me waking him up, or going to sleep so soon. He responded with "I am happy you are finding a routine that works for you babe, I love you." And THAT was the unexpected thing. I also wasn't expecting my teen and preteen kids to care about it (minecraft and ark are the most important things in their lives for the most part) but they have been extremely supportive as well.32
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BartBVanBockstaele wrote: »The main one is that hunger never goes away. It stays. I have to learn to live with hunger. I have found ways to make it more tolerable, I no longer get pains, nausea and dry-spill vomiting, but the hunger stays. Since hunger is what made me fat in the first place, I have to find ways to live with it and while it gets less difficult, it does not become pleasant. It looks as if the discomfort is there to stay until I snuff it. It is a different discomfort than the one I had when being fat, but it is a discomfort nevertheless and it is unpleasant.
My bones hurt more than before. I hate my exercise bike even more now than in the beginning, almost 60 kg ago. It just hurts. Even walking hurts more now as there is less padding on the bottom of my feet.
Sleeping is more difficult. Pillows don't help. Cushions don't do anything. Winnie the Pooh helped for a while, but no longer.
I can now really feel my xiphoid and my tailbone. The first one doesn't really bother me, the second one makes it difficult to work without being distracted because it hurts. Since I still have some way to go, I expect it to become even harder and that is not a pleasant perspective. I can also feel my collar bones. In the past, I only realised I had those from studying anatomy. Fortunately, that doesn't bother me.
My shoes are bigger now. I need slightly smaller ones. My glasses fit better than in the past. Masks now hurt more quickly since there is less padding around my ears.
Also: my fingers are significantly thinner. They used to look œdemic. No longer.
BartB, you're one of few who talks about hunger after a major weight loss. I think, it's one of the reasons that many eat it all back. It might take 2-5 years, but the hunger games sneak up on a person. Some blame the hunger hormone ghrelin. I call it ghrelin blowback, that old hormonal swing that fights against you.
You can throw everything up against the wall, do what you've always done for the love of CICO, rein it back in, dial it down and hunger may come roaring back. Few talk about it, but you do.
I've read your posts. You eat many foods that don't appeal to the masses, I could not do what you do. I wish you long lasting success. No one has all of the answers. I believe eliminating everything that gives us some level of satiety eventually backfires. In the midnight hour, conscious or unconscious, foods that cry out to us....find their way back home. Again and again and again.
It can take 2 or 3 times before we find our pathway to maintenance. It's usually pain that brings us to our senses. Pain is the precursor to long lasting change. Achy joints, backs, knees, hearts or lungs. The pain of losing yourself to a lifetime filled with regret, I'm not going out like that.
Pain will leave you once it has finished teaching you. Our pain becomes our power. We are determined not to return to those old habits that brought us here in the first place. Pain demands to be felt.
Weight loss is complex. It's a matter of the mind and body. The body never gives up on us. We can't give up on our bodies. We have to fight through the dichotomies in our mind. We may want weight loss and HAES weight acceptance at the same time, the mind doesn't know what to do with that. It will leave you spinning in your wheels.
Some may find long lasting weight stability the first time out of the chute. For others, it might take 2 or 3 times. It's a judgment free zone. Good luck with the hunger games, Bart. I've been there, too.3 -
That you’ll actually want to exercise and the issues with your knees and back ache in the morning will pretty much go away.
That you’ll get ill less often - I work in education and always used to catch things off the kids. That hardly seems to happen anymore14 -
Bump1
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JustRamona wrote: »Sand_TIger wrote: »justanotherloser007 wrote: »[
I just need to find out where desert people get their clothes!
Linen and silk will be your friends! Maybe look for options with beach cover-ups?
Agreed that people talk a lot about sagging skin here, and for good reason. Part of it is down to age and how long your skin was stretched, part is genetics, and part is skin care. I keep hearing that it gets better with time. In any case, it's sort of a badge of honor.
I hope it gets better with time and not that our eyesight fails as we age
I think the failing eyesight comes at the perfect time, so we don’t notice the wrinkles and saggy skin. My reflection in the mirror looks much better after I remove my contact lenses. It’s as good as an Instagram filter.11 -
That your male appendage will appear larger after weight loss.4
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Loose skin, pancakes and sagging breasts, seeing my body ruined and that despite all my efforts in the past and the present nothing will change that. I felt more feminine at 90kg (200lbs) than I do today at 59kg (125lbs).
And despite being around 20% of body fat, and doing heavy weight training for 3 years, knowing that I'll never have a toned body, that some of my muscles will never be defined, it will always looks "lumpy" and flabby. And it doesn't get any better with time, quite the contrary.
Thanks to *kitten* genetics.16 -
How discouraging it can actually be when people ask you what you've done to lose all the weight and when you tell them they say, "Oh, I could never do something like that. It would be too hard."16
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That you’ll get to a stage when it feels weird not to exercise. I went for a dawn run by the sea this morning and it felt fantastic (well aside from it still being really hard 😆) I’m not sure when I turned into the kind of person who runs before work for fun but I’ll take it!16
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*Not having to angle the camera just right for pictures to hide the double+ chins
*Pulling out the old favorite clothes and discovering they fit again
*Pulling out the old favorite clothes and discovering they don't fit any more because ... muscles
*You can inspire others - haters will hate, but those that don't just might be inspired
*Having the willpower to say no to foods and drinks7 -
I looked at my belly and was shocked at how strange the shape is becoming. It actually looks worse than it did before I lost weight. Also, I am getting a lot of loose skin and I never thought I would consider surgery to remove it but I still have a lot of weight to lose and expect it to get much worse before I am finished, I may consider skin removal then. I don’t know. I will try to do everything I can to help it shrink, but I don’t think it’s going to disappear.
The good news is that most of my skin inflammation has disappeared and gone. I never thought that would happen.9
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