How do you eat healthy when the rest of your family only wants to eat junk?
JenMarieD87
Posts: 34 Member
I truly need advice on this one. My husband & 13 year old boy are naturally thin, no matter what they eat. I do the shopping & cooking. I want to make healthier meals but I know it will be a challenge to get them to eat anything other than frozen pizza, nuggets, fries, hot pockets, mac n cheese, pizza rolls, snack cakes, etc. Non-frozen things they like me to make include spaghetti with cheese and garlic bread, meatloaf (cheese stuffed, bacon wrapped) and mashed potatoes, chili, loaded potato soup, cheese ravioli, biscuits and gravy, bacon, sausage, tacos, French toast, burgers, etc. Basically nothing healthy. I feel like in order for me to be successful I'm going to have to make completely separate meals for me and for them. And that sounds super overwhelming and like it will add more temptation. I'm just curious how other people in here have managed to eat better even when your family wants nothing to do with the idea lol
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Replies
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You could still eat all of those things for dinner, but:
- for yourself take a smaller portion
- add a salad on the side if a smaller portion doesn't fill you up enough
- for homemade foods, play with the recipes to add some veg into it, less fat/butter, lower calorie ingredients (mince with a lower day content for example)
- for processed foods such as frozen pizzas for example, check out the options in the supermarket and choose a lower calorie option for yourself (calorie counts can vary quite a lot)
Is the issue only for dinner, or are you preparing multiple meals a day for them? You could try to find some easy recipes that don't require much work on top of cooking for them for example throwing some precut vegetables in the oven for roasting,...5 -
I have a similar situation. I have 4 males in the family and I make pasta or risotto for them everyday for lunch, and a protein and vegetable for the evening meal. I plan something else for myself. I always have leftovers, so maybe for me, protein with a salad or a little pasta and a leftover vegetable. Today, I have a leftover barley vegetable soup for me and ravioli for them. They fill in with cold cuts, tuna, bread, salad, and cheese as they see fit.
It's really not hard once you work it out.2 -
In my family it's always been... Mom's cooking, she's in control of the meals. Suggestions are welcome, but she'll modify them as she sees fit. Don't like it? Then cook your own dinner.16
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Your list of things you make for dinner sounds a lot like what I like to eat. You can reduce calories and fat here and there (less oil, a little less cheese, etc.) and it will be painless and not noticeable. “Lighter” doesn’t mean it’s “diet” or gross or anything, it just means it’s been prepared with thought. You can get really good at this with practice. (Tip: Keep your changes secret until after they thank you for a delicious meal!)
Also, are you sure they would balk at new recipes? I had a Cooking Light cookbook when my kids were growing up and they still call to ask for recipes from that book. There is a Greek burger recipe that my son chose for his birthday dinner!
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JenMarieD87 wrote: »I feel like in order for me to be successful I'm going to have to make completely separate meals for me and for them. And that sounds super overwhelming and like it will add more temptation. I'm just curious how other people in here have managed to eat better even when your family wants nothing to do with the idea lol
That is exactly what it took for me. After 45 years of my bride preparing almost all of our meals, I finally stopped eating the processed stuff she made that came out of a box or a can and prepared my own from whole foods. She does her grocery shopping, I do mine. There is my side of the pantry and her's. She eats 1 main carb loaded meal a day with plenty of snacking on crackers and Doritos with dips (which are hard to resist participating in). I eat 4-5 low carb meals a day and am completely satiated as long as I stay away from the cookies, pastries and candies she leaves sitting out on the kitchen counter. She'll eat some of the meats and vegetables I grill or cook in the air fryer, but would rather roast her vegies in the oven, drowned in oil and heavily salted.
We've been doing this for over a year now and are getting use to it. There is no point in trying to convince others to change (its never worked with my spouse). The last few months she has been eating some of the things I buy: chia, flax meal, spinach and whey in her high carb diet - mainly because she can't help but notice how much fat I've lost during this time.
Our family dynamics are totally different from yours. You'll need to find a way to take care of yourself and let your men tighten up their belts and fend for themselves if they don't like what you set on the table. The suggestions given by @Lietchi will only work if you don't experience the uncontrollable carb cravings that people like me get from eating high glycemic foods. With a little cooperation from the guys, the techniques mentioned by @snowflake954 sounds like they would work better. Everyone and every situation is different. Keep trying until you find what works for you and yours. Good luck!
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The goal you have in mind ( if you have any) is not worth the work you’re willing to put in.
For me, even when I was snacking on “small amounts” of junk food, i was getting nowhere near what I wanted my physique to look like.
It wasn’t until I told my-SELF, “hey, you’re going to compete in your first show ever! Get your self a coach, pay him, and do it! This way if you don’t want to stick to the protocol or feel like cheating on a snack here and there, it’ll sting a lot, since you’ve put money into it, and you know damn well how hard it is to acquire that money”.
After I signed up with a coach ( a week later) it was game on and I’ve never looked back!
Going on 12 weeks now, with 11 weeks out from my first show.
So my advice, invest in your goals, this’ll be a huge motivating factor. It’ll also make your husband keep you in check because he knows money don’t grow on trees either.
As a bonus, the dramatic changes in your physique will spice up your marriage 😉1 -
I_AM_ISRAEL wrote: »The goal you have in mind ( if you have any) is not worth the work you’re willing to put in.
For me, even when I was snacking on “small amounts” of junk food, i was getting nowhere near what I wanted my physique to look like.
It wasn’t until I told my-SELF, “hey, you’re going to compete in your first show ever! Get your self a coach, pay him, and do it! This way if you don’t want to stick to the protocol or feel like cheating on a snack here and there, it’ll sting a lot, since you’ve put money into it, and you know damn well how hard it is to acquire that money”.
After I signed up with a coach ( a week later) it was game on and I’ve never looked back!
Going on 12 weeks now, with 11 weeks out from my first show.
So my advice, invest in your goals, this’ll be a huge motivating factor. It’ll also make your husband keep you in check because he knows money don’t grow on trees either.
As a bonus, the dramatic changes in your physique will spice up your marriage 😉
I'm asking "Did you read the OP?" She is asking for help balancing cooking for family and then herself. She didn't ask about a personal trainer, or getting a "physique" to "spice up her marriage". Perhaps her marriage is spicy enough? Her "goal" is organization. How is investing in that going to work? This is the most off-the-wall answer I've seen. Not everyone is going to do a "show".19 -
My husband is the same way. Eats whatever he wants and remains slim. I eat a smaller portion of the dinner I make for him and add more vegetables. Earlier this week I pre chopped veggies for roasting, let them cool, and stuck them in the fridge for later. For example, I roasted butternut squash, carrots, and brussels sprouts in the oven at 400 degrees for 30 minutes (took the sprouts out at 20 minutes), let them cool and stuck them in the fridge. Those veggies were used for 3 days of meals. You could even cut all of them up, stick them in a bowl to roast (steam, put in soup) later. I used to find it overwhelming, but set the timer on your phone while you chop and you will see chopping doesn't take too much time at all and if you keep doing it, it becomes an easier habit. Think of it as self care.4
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I_AM_ISRAEL wrote: »The goal you have in mind ( if you have any) is not worth the work you’re willing to put in.
For me, even when I was snacking on “small amounts” of junk food, i was getting nowhere near what I wanted my physique to look like.
It wasn’t until I told my-SELF, “hey, you’re going to compete in your first show ever! Get your self a coach, pay him, and do it! This way if you don’t want to stick to the protocol or feel like cheating on a snack here and there, it’ll sting a lot, since you’ve put money into it, and you know damn well how hard it is to acquire that money”.
After I signed up with a coach ( a week later) it was game on and I’ve never looked back!
Going on 12 weeks now, with 11 weeks out from my first show.
So my advice, invest in your goals, this’ll be a huge motivating factor. It’ll also make your husband keep you in check because he knows money don’t grow on trees either.
As a bonus, the dramatic changes in your physique will spice up your marriage 😉
Seriously asking...did you mean to post this to a different thread?
Because it has nothing to do with what the OP asked.6 -
JenMarieD87 wrote: »I truly need advice on this one. My husband & 13 year old boy are naturally thin, no matter what they eat. I do the shopping & cooking. I want to make healthier meals but I know it will be a challenge to get them to eat anything other than frozen pizza, nuggets, fries, hot pockets, mac n cheese, pizza rolls, snack cakes, etc. Non-frozen things they like me to make include spaghetti with cheese and garlic bread, meatloaf (cheese stuffed, bacon wrapped) and mashed potatoes, chili, loaded potato soup, cheese ravioli, biscuits and gravy, bacon, sausage, tacos, French toast, burgers, etc. Basically nothing healthy. I feel like in order for me to be successful I'm going to have to make completely separate meals for me and for them. And that sounds super overwhelming and like it will add more temptation. I'm just curious how other people in here have managed to eat better even when your family wants nothing to do with the idea lol
As others have stated, a lot of these meals can be subtly altered or added to in order to make them better for your goals.
If it were me, I'd tell the family to make their frozen favorites on their own for lunches or snacks.
For dinners, you can make some adjustments to the amount of butter, oil, or cheese to the dishes and the family probably wouldn't notice. Then, just have a smaller portion and add a salad or vegetable side dish for yourself.
A burger with a side salad and some roasted broccoli is a nice meal. You can throw some French fries in the oven for the rest of them if they don't want side veggies.
Pasta and chili are easy to doctor up with extra vegetables that add bulk without adding a lot of calories. Hopefully, your family is not totally vegetable-adverse and would be willing to try this.
Tacos are really versatile, too. Since everyone typically builds their own anyway, find tortillas and toppings that fit your goals without having to sacrifice taco night.4 -
Sometimes it's taking the family favorites and making them a little healthier....use lower sodium broth, low sodium canned food if you have to use canned. We use ground turkey instead of ground beef for spaghetti and tacos. For spaghetti we have switched to whole wheat pasta. Like other have said, have a smaller serving of the main dish and a side salad. I've also started using a smaller plate to serve myself.
When we make tacos we put in a can of no salt added black beans (drained) in with the meat..it makes more Taco filling and the extra fiber is great too. They pick up thr Taco seasoning flavor so you really dont notice the beans. I turn mine into a Taco bowl with a serving of brown rice, Taco meat, some cheese, lettuce (and what ever other veggies you want) and crush up a few tortilla Chios for crunch. It's so good..I look forward to it after work when I know it's Taco day.2 -
Have you thought about implementing intermittent fasting? Having a smaller window to consume the calories means more calories per meal. So far its been working for my similar family. I make the kids their breakfast and lunch, send them to school. My husband makes his own lunch. Then I cook dinner. If we have a dinner worth 1,000 cal, it's no big deal because I usually have that many left for dinner.
Lots of people do 16 hours fasting and 8 hours window to eat. Some do one meal per day and eat all their calories then. There's different programs for timing but all of them allow more calories per meal by default because of timing! The first few days you would ease in, but honestly the body adjusts quickly.1 -
Unfortunately, this is YOUR uptaking and not theirs. So you'll have to prep for yourself. OR as mentioned, eat what they do, but stay well within your calorie restriction.JenMarieD87 wrote: »I truly need advice on this one. My husband & 13 year old boy are naturally thin, no matter what they eat. I do the shopping & cooking. I want to make healthier meals but I know it will be a challenge to get them to eat anything other than frozen pizza, nuggets, fries, hot pockets, mac n cheese, pizza rolls, snack cakes, etc. Non-frozen things they like me to make include spaghetti with cheese and garlic bread, meatloaf (cheese stuffed, bacon wrapped) and mashed potatoes, chili, loaded potato soup, cheese ravioli, biscuits and gravy, bacon, sausage, tacos, French toast, burgers, etc. Basically nothing healthy. I feel like in order for me to be successful I'm going to have to make completely separate meals for me and for them. And that sounds super overwhelming and like it will add more temptation. I'm just curious how other people in here have managed to eat better even when your family wants nothing to do with the idea lol
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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so, no one in my family was/is willing to change their eating - and I had to decide if I wanted to make changes for me even if that meant eating different foods.... As I am the cook, I make adjustments where I can, and cook different sides. for example, meats in a divided pan - theirs with sauces, mine with spices. I found 'batch cooking' to help - simply making enough to last 2 or 3 meals so I cook fresh dinner entrees 2 or 3 times a week - and for me, i batch cook/cook ahead sometimes veggies or my lunches like a big pot of soup. Even though it is more work, it was the way through for me to make progress with my personal goals. When it gets tempting to eat 'their' foods because of smell, handling, etc.... I remind myself 'it's their food, not mine, I have my own delicious food that nourishes my body that I also love/enjoy eating." things like that... it's (you are) worth exploring ways to get you going on your own goals. Cheers
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snowflake954 wrote: »I_AM_ISRAEL wrote: »The goal you have in mind ( if you have any) is not worth the work you’re willing to put in.
For me, even when I was snacking on “small amounts” of junk food, i was getting nowhere near what I wanted my physique to look like.
It wasn’t until I told my-SELF, “hey, you’re going to compete in your first show ever! Get your self a coach, pay him, and do it! This way if you don’t want to stick to the protocol or feel like cheating on a snack here and there, it’ll sting a lot, since you’ve put money into it, and you know damn well how hard it is to acquire that money”.
After I signed up with a coach ( a week later) it was game on and I’ve never looked back!
Going on 12 weeks now, with 11 weeks out from my first show.
So my advice, invest in your goals, this’ll be a huge motivating factor. It’ll also make your husband keep you in check because he knows money don’t grow on trees either.
As a bonus, the dramatic changes in your physique will spice up your marriage 😉
I'm asking "Did you read the OP?" She is asking for help balancing cooking for family and then herself. She didn't ask about a personal trainer, or getting a "physique" to "spice up her marriage". Perhaps her marriage is spicy enough? Her "goal" is organization. How is investing in that going to work? This is the most off-the-wall answer I've seen. Not everyone is going to do a "show".
😂😂3 -
Most of the things you list that your family wants to eat aren't really things that need to be cooked. They just need to be heated.
When I was growing up, we had family supper most evenings. What was served is what was eaten. If one wasn't hungry enough to eat that, then they didn't have to eat. That was what was served. Same thing happens now on river trips or the like. What's being served is what is available to eat. Each person has the option to eat or not eat.
Start making more healthy meals. Your family can either eat what you lovingly serve them, or they can pass. You can, if you wish, let them heat up their own less healthy options like frozen pizza or hot pockets. You'll be doing them a favor if you can move them towards a more healthy way of eating. Tough love? Maybe. But it comes from a place of love!
My sister's family has a weekly meeting where they do meal planning. If someone doesn't show up, they aren't allowed to complain about what's served. The family eats what's for dinner. It's the only option. They have learned over time that it's better to eat supper than go hungry.
Good luck.7 -
Speaking as a guy, I say let the guys there deal with it. They should be supporting your journey, especially if the cost to them is just, oh no, eating a healthy balanced meal instead of frozen pizza garbage. The horror! They can always get some cookies or ice cream later if they want.
For the stuff you're proper cooking, as others said, substitutions and portion control. Use lower calorie butter option. Don't cover your own in sauces. They can have bacon on the side, you avoid it. Get turkey sausage instead of higher fat pork sausage. They can have a loaded baked potato, you have it plain. You can take a smaller portion.
If they continue to eat their frozen crap, the nights they're having a frozen pizza, you can make yourself something better. The time to make two meals there is just your meal prep plus 30 seconds to unwrap the pizza and slide it in the oven.
You can also meal prep some of your own stuff on the weekend, and leave portions in the fridge or freezer for during the week.6 -
I_AM_ISRAEL wrote: »The goal you have in mind ( if you have any) is not worth the work you’re willing to put in.
For me, even when I was snacking on “small amounts” of junk food, i was getting nowhere near what I wanted my physique to look like.
It wasn’t until I told my-SELF, “hey, you’re going to compete in your first show ever! Get your self a coach, pay him, and do it! This way if you don’t want to stick to the protocol or feel like cheating on a snack here and there, it’ll sting a lot, since you’ve put money into it, and you know damn well how hard it is to acquire that money”.
After I signed up with a coach ( a week later) it was game on and I’ve never looked back!
Going on 12 weeks now, with 11 weeks out from my first show.
So my advice, invest in your goals, this’ll be a huge motivating factor. It’ll also make your husband keep you in check because he knows money don’t grow on trees either.
As a bonus, the dramatic changes in your physique will spice up your marriage 😉
Yikes. My husband likes my curves and extra pudge but thanks for assuming he isn't attracted to me as I am. Im the one who doesn't like it.
Anyway... thanks to those who provided helpful feedback lol 😁8 -
Unfortunately, this is YOUR uptaking and not theirs. So you'll have to prep for yourself. OR as mentioned, eat what they do, but stay well within your calorie restriction.JenMarieD87 wrote: »I truly need advice on this one. My husband & 13 year old boy are naturally thin, no matter what they eat. I do the shopping & cooking. I want to make healthier meals but I know it will be a challenge to get them to eat anything other than frozen pizza, nuggets, fries, hot pockets, mac n cheese, pizza rolls, snack cakes, etc. Non-frozen things they like me to make include spaghetti with cheese and garlic bread, meatloaf (cheese stuffed, bacon wrapped) and mashed potatoes, chili, loaded potato soup, cheese ravioli, biscuits and gravy, bacon, sausage, tacos, French toast, burgers, etc. Basically nothing healthy. I feel like in order for me to be successful I'm going to have to make completely separate meals for me and for them. And that sounds super overwhelming and like it will add more temptation. I'm just curious how other people in here have managed to eat better even when your family wants nothing to do with the idea lol
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
I already prep for myself and everyone else. That's my point. They want me to feed them but all they want to eat is garbage. Im not expecting them to do anything for me.0 -
sollyn23l2 wrote: »In my family it's always been... Mom's cooking, she's in control of the meals. Suggestions are welcome, but she'll modify them as she sees fit. Don't like it? Then cook your own dinner.
This! 👆🏻
I also agree.. even though your family is thin.. trying to make them eat healthier as the matriarch .. may help them years from now. Could be an opportunity to talk about health and nutrition in the family.
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