Anyone have a case of "the haters"

24

Replies

  • ncgingerich
    ncgingerich Posts: 46 Member
    Someone asked me today if I was losing weight. Ouch...I have lost over 70 lbs. That hurt.:noway:

    This!! I started MFP to lose just over 30 pounds a few months ago. I've lost 18 which is more than half way to my goal and only 2 or 3 people have even noticed which is sometimes maddening to me. I wonder if others with under 20 or 30 pounds to lose experience the same thing. I do manage to shake it off and find my own encouragement from being able to fit back into more and more of my "skinny clothes" that have been gathering dust in my closet. Great job to you for losing over 70lbs - that is amazing progress!!
  • millionsofpeaches
    millionsofpeaches Posts: 372
    I hate on hipsters.
  • engineman312
    engineman312 Posts: 3,450 Member
    hatereagle.jpg
  • rosied915
    rosied915 Posts: 799 Member
    Someone asked me today if I was losing weight. Ouch...I have lost over 70 lbs. That hurt.:noway:

    This!! I started MFP to lose just over 30 pounds a few months ago. I've lost 18 which is more than half way to my goal and only 2 or 3 people have even noticed which is sometimes maddening to me. I wonder if others with under 20 or 30 pounds to lose experience the same thing. I do manage to shake it off and find my own encouragement from being able to fit back into more and more of my "skinny clothes" that have been gathering dust in my closet. Great job to you for losing over 70lbs - that is amazing progress!!

    Congrats to BOTH of you on the success of your journey thusfar!!

    I'd like to throw something else out there~ I had that incident last night with one friend and this has happened before with other people. When I've talked about it with my Mom, she thought that some people just won't talk about weight because it's too personal or they don't want the person to think they were so noticably fat before the weight loss and risk hurting their feelings.

    I can agree with this on some level but even "acquaintances" like "gym buddies" can find a way to say it tactfully and give a person a little "boost"!
  • laura2501
    laura2501 Posts: 107 Member
    i bumped into a"FRIEND" that i have not seen in a bout a year and while i have lost just over 3 stone she has gained i told her that she looked well ,she looked me up and down, said she was in a rush and she would call me some time and left without another word,,my mom was with me and could not get over her, she actually looked mad because i had lost weight, needless to say i wont be expecting the call
  • acquiescent
    acquiescent Posts: 18
    Your friends and work colleagues do not want to hear people babble on about working out, weightloss or calorie counting! They couldn't give two hoots. Afterall, do you really need their stamp of approval? Surely the fact that you have commited to a heathly eating and exercise plan and have the results to support your own success should be enough! Be proud of yourselves. Your not going to receive a gold star or get $200 for passing 'Go'... harden up and realise that you did this for YOURSELF not for the approval of others.

    They just see you as a the party-pooper that won't losen up and have a beer OR come out and have a coffee & biscuit. And they are right in a way, but YOU know what is best for YOUR own health and to get YOU where YOU want to be. So why do you care what THEY say? It's not that they are not being supportive, it's just that they probably don't care as it doesn't affect them!

    I NEVER comment on anyones weight loss. Because I figure that it's inappropriate to comment on weight gain, which is also a lifestyle choice. So what ,you've lost weight because you woke up to yourself and realised what's in YOUR BEST Interests? And now you want a pat on the back?

    I have yo-yo'd through the years (to my own detriment) and respect those that are able to consistantly sustain a healthy balance.

    Do you like to hear about your co-workers carry on about how they are potty training their 2yo? Or hear the lady that sits next to you whine about how pathetic the hens night her maid of honour organised was? Or even worse... once she avalanches into her wedding saga? Or how the coffee bloke is going home to yet again beat his all time record in some dorky online game? Or how sick your neighbours dog is (because it's owner is dumb enough to feed it cat food)? NO!! No one wants to hear about this, just like they don't want to hear you carry on about your calories!

    I applaud everyone for taking the steps required to achieve their goals! I wish you all the very best in continuing your efforts.

    Thank you for articulating exactly what was in my head!
  • 0PhAtDaDdY
    0PhAtDaDdY Posts: 569 Member
    Hey all!

    So, I have dropped weight and totally changed my lifestyle. My family and friends have been supportive and are happy for me. But, there are people that seem to try to put me down. Statements like " the first 10 pounds are easiest to lose"...then I lose over 15...and they say "the first 10-15 pounds are the easiest to lose"...lol.

    Or I will mention that I lost weight and they will not acknowledge it. No supportive words or reassurance that I do look like I lost weight.

    Any finally, people that go out of their way to try and sabotage your diet. "Oh come on, share a dessert with me","You go to the gym all the time...it's so boring,come drink!"

    Any one else have these issues?

    JeAlOuS!
  • ejohndrow
    ejohndrow Posts: 1,399 Member
    When asked to go out and drink, I decline 99% of the time. I get met with 'why not'

    I simply say 'i cant drink' ..mainly cause of diet, and its always a waste. I work with guys who literally drink every night after work, waste their money, health and all that. And they LOOK like thats what they do.

    some ppl just don't get it.

    Since I've stopped drinking and going out to the bar my friends have dropped like flies-It's all good though, I now havea gym full of hot guys to hang out with. Not consuming empty calories and I'm getting in shape. I win!
  • kandrews24
    kandrews24 Posts: 610 Member
    I have a friend who recently told me she hates the fact that I watch what I eat and don't eat treats all time anymore. She says it make our end of day coffee time boring and she doesn't like the conversation about weight loss or needing new clothes. (she has lost 15lbs because of it) Oh well that's life.

    Doesn't sound like she's your friend.
  • kandrews24
    kandrews24 Posts: 610 Member
    I think the haters and sabbotagers can be likened to crabs in a bucket. There's an old saying that if you put one crab in a bucket, you have to put a lid on the bucket to keep it from climbing out. If you put several crabs in a bucket, you don't need a lid because every time one of them tries to climb out, the rest of them pull it back down. The haters want to pull you back down to their level.

    THIS!
  • prettyfitchick
    prettyfitchick Posts: 502 Member
    I work with a bunch of men and I told them I lost 2 INCHES FROM MY WAIST they said good job we will bring some glazed donuts in tomorrow WTF I dont want to eat that and My mom who is like 300 lbs said 10lbs is easy lose well why dont you try it and see how easy it is or has any one told you 5lbs thats just water weight Some people are just haters
  • lee155
    lee155 Posts: 120
    One of my skinny ex friend told me I was getting too skinny and I'm starting to look like crackhead. Every day she makes a snarky remark. "stop losing weight or else you will look like nicole richie and my size now is great". I stopped talking to her because my weight is always a conversation. Leave me alone! You've been skinny your whole entire life.
  • 500daysofshelby
    500daysofshelby Posts: 41
    For the most part everyone has been really supportive of my progress (I've lost 6 pounds total so far). My friends and I all have been making healthier lifestyle changes lately, since one of my friends was diagnosed with diabetes. Even though she's the only one that has it out of my group of friends, we all decided to make her feel more comfortable and support her by going along with her and changing our lifestyles. It's all really improved our friendships and health for the better. I've even inspired a few of my other friends to be healthier and get in shape, they haven't committed yet but I'm helping them try and make it a part of their routines.

    As for "haters" I don't have any that I know of, but my parents have been buying Twizzlers and Sweedish Fish for me anyway. I'm not sure if the sabotage is intentional or not...
  • shellysloop
    shellysloop Posts: 3
    My sister in law had this issue with her in laws...do cave to the haters! They are jealous and should join you. Seperate yourself from them as much as possible just like you need to seperate yourself from the foods that put the weight on.

    Also, remember as much as it sounds like you are craving attention and recognition from everyone...YOU ARE DOING THIS FOR YOU!!! Keep going and prove them wrong so that you will be wearing the skinny jeans and not them. DON"T let them be right!

    You Got This!!!
  • shellysloop
    shellysloop Posts: 3
    ooops...DON'T cave to the haters!!!
  • Iceskatefanrn
    Iceskatefanrn Posts: 489 Member
    Sometimes it's not good to me a smarty pants like I am... but I did hit a coworker with a zinger a while back...

    We had an all day department "retreat" - lunch was brought in from a local, completely FABULOUS mexican restaurant - chicken and beef fajitas - meat cooked with bell peppers and onions... tortillas... chips and queso... sour craem, cheese, the whole she-bang.

    I was gonna give in, having a "what the heck" moment... but when I got up there to pile up, there were bigger paper plates and smaller ones. The coworker in front of me grabbed a bigger one and tried to hand me one as I was reaching for a smaller plate, and I said "no thanx, I have a plate" when she tried to hand me the huge one.

    She then said "you know, that is NOT going to make you eat less!"... At that moment, the filter between my brain and my mouth turned completely off, and I heard myself say in a snappy voice... "oh yeah? WATCH ME!"

    Well, not only did I eat LESS... but I'm on the 17 Day Diet, and at that time I was in Cycle 1 - no carbs. So I ate chicken, bell peppers, and onions. That was it! No tortillas, chips, cheese... It was one of those "I CAN TOTALLY DO THIS" moments, and although I felt a bit bad for snapping at the coworker, I felt TERRIFIC about my success at that meal!

    :drinker: :drinker: :drinker:

    Ice
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
    Haters don't annoy me. They amuse me. It's just their kind of "motivation" that works for me...
  • shellie1206
    shellie1206 Posts: 80 Member
    There are sooo many negative people in this world, and you cant let those people get to you. I have learned that negativity is reasuring for me, cause I know that they are sad misserable people. Your sooo better than that, you will always be better than that. Keep up the good work :)
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    Everyone I know is pretty nice to me. I don't talk about fitness with people unless I know they are interested in it, too.

    That being said, everyone is jealous of everyone.
  • AngelsheriHackley
    AngelsheriHackley Posts: 67 Member
    YES IN DEED!! I AM GOING THROUGH THAT RIGHT NOW. ITS TERRIBLE BUT THANK GOD I HAVE A LOVING HUBBY WHO IS MY BIGGEST SUPPORT. HANG IN THERE BECAUSE THEY ARE MY MOTIVATION
  • jenscot25
    jenscot25 Posts: 124 Member
    I can't wait until people start to hate me. :drinker:

    AMEN!!! That will be great:love:
  • ElleC
    ElleC Posts: 37
    I think when you make a change it inspires two types of reactions.

    The first is support.

    The second is jealousy.

    There are a whole bunch of people out there who know they should make changes to their own lifestyle. Watching someone else do it and be successful is hard when you know you have to make a change yourself, but for whatever reason....you are finding it really hard to do.

    I'm not going to lie. I have been on both sides of the coin. I am currently making changes and succeeding...and am experiencing support and jealousy. On the other hand, I have seen other people take control of their lives and have felt insane envy over it. I admit to saying in my head.....oh, but 10lbs is easy, even I COULD do that (I didn't though!)

    It's a little like bullying....usually the bully is unhappy is pushing that on to someone else. I feel sorry for those people who cant support our lifestyle changes.I am trying to be patient and understand that they would probably like to make the change themselves.
  • koosdel
    koosdel Posts: 3,317 Member
    Put some Blue Star Ointment on it. Should clear right up, if you quit picking at it.
  • mmuzzatti
    mmuzzatti Posts: 704 Member
    So lets see we are going to be skinny, healthy, happy, non drinking, hmm I could live with that because I know what party I'll be at....with all of you as my party people! I guarantee you if you put all of us in a room right now we would be the ones that people want to hang out with...why...thought you would never ask because of our attitude in what we want and what we support each other with! I'm with all of you and the hardest part to all of dieting or life style changes is starting! The rest comes easy!
  • MIMITIME
    MIMITIME Posts: 405 Member
    My mother use to say that she always wondered why some children did the things they did. She went on to say after having the job of managing 100 adults, she then knew. The point is, some adults never mature and still have childish behavior. Sounds like some of the stories here.
  • tuacsmm
    tuacsmm Posts: 24 Member
    :laugh:
  • jenscot25
    jenscot25 Posts: 124 Member
    While I do believe my husbands heart is in the right place, he sometimes says some really stupid things. Like I asked what he thought I weighed in at this morning and said, "well you drank last night so you're going to be dehydrated." Never mind that I have documented every morsal of food I have placed in my mouth. Or after I tell him my progress, he will say "Don't get cocky babe." I'm excited and just want him to be too. :grumble:
  • sonyapowell
    sonyapowell Posts: 38 Member
    over the years i have noticed some haters are jelous. some folks just do not know what to do for you if they can't feed you (like or mom or chubby aunt). some times my husband is proud of me and he askes me if i would like a treat out of kindness and then gets some bigger pleasure out of bragging on me when i turn it down. some of my relatives are afraid compliment me thinking it could cause "the other shoe to drop" and then i would back slide, like i have many times. The good news is that for today i can be my own cheerleader and i can tell i am losing and i FEEL good, i FEEL sexy and i love the way this FEELS!!!!
  • withchaco
    withchaco Posts: 1,026 Member
    Your friends and work colleagues do not want to hear people babble on about working out, weightloss or calorie counting! They couldn't give two hoots. Afterall, do you really need their stamp of approval?

    . . .

    So what ,you've lost weight because you woke up to yourself and realised what's in YOUR BEST Interests? And now you want a pat on the back?
    You're missing the point. Many of these people aren't asking for compliments or approval. Sometimes you get negative comments when you haven't asked for any kind of feedback -- and/ or when you haven't even been talking about health/ weight loss/ etc. They don't necessarily want a pat on the back; they just want to do their stuff in peace without anyone saying discouraging things to them.
  • Amy911Gray
    Amy911Gray Posts: 685 Member
    I'm finding that the people I really really like have more positive things to say than the people that try to get me to "crash" the diet. And the "diet" is working well around the house too. Once I found that I can do this, I'm really not listening to what the under-miners are doing...And I'm finding it quite easy to walk past breakfast burritos and delectable pristine glazed donuts that are all over the office every single day...

    I'm totally loving the fact that I've made more work for myself--take today---I have to go find the next size down clothes, try them on, repair if needed and get them ready for the work week!!!
This discussion has been closed.

Categories