I FINALLY DID IT!!!!

BEFORE AND AFTER PICS
Click above hyperlink to see photos

USA – 5’7 | SW: 220lbs | CW: 133lbs
UK – 5’7 | SW: 15st 10lbs | CW: 9st 7lbs
Rest of World – 170cm | SW: 100kg | CW: 60kg (rounded to nearest kg)

My backstory –
I was a slim child and teenager, seemingly from nowhere I started piling on the weight when I turned 18. It would be easy to blame it on this or that, but I was obviously consuming more calories than I burned in the grand scheme of things.

I’ve struggled with my mental health all my life and you could usually tell how I was by looking at how my weight was trending. In a depressive episode I’d neglect everything, cleaning, hygiene, eating, everything and this would result in my weight noticeably falling off me. If I was not in such a low state and feeling a little better, I’d begin to make up for mistreating myself by *checks notes* further mistreating myself, piling back on the weight that I had lost. For the past 10 years I’ve been cycling between overweight and obese without even trying or wanting to lose or gain, my usual range was from 175lbs to 220lbs.

Cut to COVID and my weight is doing its own thing, as was my mental health. I reached a breaking point and had to be admitted to a mental hospital for a while in 2021, the week prior to my hospitalisation I had lost 10lbs which was soon gained back after being medicated. 2021 was a dark year for me and I made a few attempts on my life, you’ve probably come to realise that all attempts were unsuccessful. I faced a lot of tough times and I’m still trying to deal with the trauma of them to this day, thankfully I have the help of professionals. I always see myself as in recovery and not recovered, even now 2 years on.

I slowly started to improve and encouraged myself to take small steps, I started to be able to leave the house by myself, I landed a new job, I removed toxicity from my life, I moved house, all the nice things! In late 2022 I started to feel those horrible thoughts creeping back to me, I recognised my warning signs and I reached out for help. Unfortunately the UK National Health Service is grossly underfunded and I couldn’t be helped on this occasion, I’ve found that they can’t help unless you’ve already done something. I decided to do everything in my power to improve my mental health, I will put the work in where the professionals lacked on this occasion. I was already on meds, I had undergone a lot of therapy in the past but paid for a counsellor, I tried mindfulness, socialising more, decreasing screen time, long baths, healthy sleeping patterns and I even bought crystals lmao, just anything that would help as I was desperate to feel better. My final step was overhauling my diet and activity level. We all know that too much sugar is bad and can cause crashes throughout the day, eating in a surplus affects your weight, and that exercise releases endorphins in your brain and helps you sleep better.

It was a no brainer. The start of the rest of my life began in November 2022. I began to eat three meals a day, between TDEE minus 1000cal and TDEE. This accounted for my good days and bad, no undereating and no overeating. I had never dieted in my life and I’m a fussy eater, but I wanted to sustain this habit, I ate things I liked but in moderation where required. Every week I’d fit a meal out into my budget, even a beer if I had enough to spare. I’d prioritise protein then I eventually started supplementing to get to my protein goal daily (protip- get whey isolate as it has fewer calories for the protein content), I started baking high protein-low calorie snacks such as THESE, they will change your life. On days where I’d be in a 1000cal deficit I’d still be satiated due to the high amounts of protein I’d consume. I’m basically fuelled by protein and fruit at this point.

As for fitness I started to attend my gym at work, it had a few cardio machines, some weights along with strength training machines. Thankfully it was November and nobody used the gym at work so I could go and work out with no one seeing my awful form lmao. I hate cardio so all I did was weights, as a newbie I absolutely hated it and wanted to see progress immediately – don’t we all! But I remember thinking “Stick to this for 6 weeks, then see how you feel” and that’s exactly what I did, it takes 6 weeks to form a habit or so I’ve heard. After working out 5 times a week over those 6 weeks it definitely stuck. Come January a lot of people started using the gym at work, unfortunately the gym is very small and has only one machine for the odd few exercises and queues would form for one machine, so I joined my local gym.

I didn’t worry about wasting money as I knew I had a fully established habit at this point, my gym is 24/7 and I don’t have to go into work on my days off just to use the gym. Instead of finding excuses to not go, I’m finding excuses to go! I force myself to have one rest day a week and I also force myself to have one cardio day a week. Going from my work gym to my local gym, my workouts would go from 4-5 days a week to 6 and sessions would go from 1 hour to 2 hours. I’d see increasingly familiar faces and became friends with the trainers, it just felt good to be around people with similar goals so I never felt self-conscious. Those elusive endorphins I had heard about are definitely real. I used to wake up at 3pm every weekend but now I set an alarm at 8am to go to the gym and run errands, I just feel so full of energy and refreshed. I’m ready to take on the world. That being said, there is no cure for depression and I still have bad days however I’m experiencing fewer of those bad days now.

My only issue now is trying to coordinate my hair washing days and finding clothes that don’t fall off of me. I’m going to reward my progress with a big clothes haul, getting a belly button piercing and having my hair done.

I’ve spent my entire 20s either overweight or obese, next year I’ll be entering my 30s as healthy. My journey has not finished, I’d like to sustain my new habits and maintain my progress.