I smell like a sewer....

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Replies

  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
    I was told to come here.

    :laugh: :laugh:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    Feel like home Max???
  • Ezzie
    Ezzie Posts: 665 Member
    and.....
    Why do farts smell bad? :ohwell:





    So the hearing impaired can enjoy them too........:noway: :noway:
  • memaw66
    memaw66 Posts: 2,558 Member
    The first time I farted in front of my husband, he thought it was the cutest thing, that's when I KNEW he was the man for me, that and the fact that he didn't leave me at the bottom of the hill with my pants down, (read dating stories)!

    My mom always said she didn't fart she "fluffed"!

    Memaw
  • 72lori
    72lori Posts: 6,797 Member
    Thanks for a good laugh. In fact I'm laughing so hard tears are running down my cheeks and my kids wonder what's so funny.

    I can relate, in fact told my hubby the other day (whose been in Iraq since I started on this healthy eating adventure) that eating healthy really stinks, literally! Poor guy, he has no idea what he's coming home to.

    Just for the records, I learned from experience one day, do not eat a cup of egg beaters, mixed with a cup of broccoli for an omlet and a whey protein shake all at once. Toxic combo!
  • BxMom
    BxMom Posts: 363
    tmi.gif

    smiley-fart005.gif393.gif

    nothingtoadd.gif
  • 72lori
    72lori Posts: 6,797 Member
    Also, I wish I glistened, I sweat like a pig, to the point it drips all over the treadmill when I workout. Nice, huh?

    And I'm still laughing over this post......
  • TROUBLE2
    TROUBLE2 Posts: 6,660
    Also, I wish I glistened, I sweat like a pig, to the point it drips all over the treadmill when I workout. Nice, huh?

    And I'm still laughing over this post......

    I do not understand this post, because Pigs do not have sweat glands much like dogs... so they obviously do not sweat... WHERE did this saying come from??? does anyone know?

    hmmm very interesting...

    I always blame mine on barking spiders or frogs... its what my father did and his father before him... lets pray that I do not have kids... :wink: :laugh: :blushing:
  • chrissyh
    chrissyh Posts: 8,235 Member
    We "Step on a frog" at our house!
  • TROUBLE2
    TROUBLE2 Posts: 6,660
    We "Step on a frog" at our house!

    its funny because when my cousin was younger we said that to him and every time we would fart in front f him he would run over and slap his foot against the ground and proclaim "I GOT IT!" and we would just laugh...
  • connieq288
    connieq288 Posts: 1,102 Member
    My 20 mth old daughter will burp and she thinks it is the funniest thing when she does. She just laughs her little head off.

    Connie
  • chrissyh
    chrissyh Posts: 8,235 Member
    one time we were eating at this steakhouse - midafternoon so only one other guy in the dining room - my son let off a burp - a LOUD burp and the guy across the restaraunt said - that was a 10 - quite embarrassing but funny all the same
  • brandyjan
    brandyjan Posts: 18 Member
    We "Step on a frog" at our house!


    Awesome!!

    Growing up my mom stepped on loud frogs all the time and I never seemed to have this issue until after I had my kids. I think my mom sent her frogs to my house as a baby shower gift....



    I must share this....

    My mom tells this story so I'm not afraid to pass it on.

    When I was little we were at the grocery store and mom was in the meat section. She was alone (except for me of course) and so she let one. Seconds later a man walked up and said, "I think this meat is rotten!" She jetted...lol:laugh:
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
    Also, I wish I glistened, I sweat like a pig, to the point it drips all over the treadmill when I workout. Nice, huh?

    And I'm still laughing over this post......

    I do not understand this post, because Pigs do not have sweat glands much like dogs... so they obviously do not sweat... WHERE did this saying come from??? does anyone know?

    hmmm very interesting...

    I always blame mine on barking spiders or frogs... its what my father did and his father before him... lets pray that I do not have kids... :wink: :laugh: :blushing:

    My husband and his friend when golfing would blame them on the Rocky Mountain Barking Squirrels-- deadly critters, believe me!
  • TROUBLE2
    TROUBLE2 Posts: 6,660
    Also, I wish I glistened, I sweat like a pig, to the point it drips all over the treadmill when I workout. Nice, huh?

    And I'm still laughing over this post......

    I do not understand this post, because Pigs do not have sweat glands much like dogs... so they obviously do not sweat... WHERE did this saying come from??? does anyone know?

    hmmm very interesting...

    I always blame mine on barking spiders or frogs... its what my father did and his father before him... lets pray that I do not have kids... :wink: :laugh: :blushing:

    My husband and his friend when golfing would blame them on the Rocky Mountain Barking Squirrels-- deadly critters, believe me!

    those are dangerous creatures for sure... but have you seen the prarie land barking spiders??? they are strong enough to sufficate a man... I have seen it... especially golfing while drinking beer... and having a hot dog during the turn... dangerous critters
  • hmo4
    hmo4 Posts: 1,673 Member
    Depending on the vocalarity of the "queef", we've also asked "who stepped on a duck?":laugh: My daughter-16, was just nagging at me so I told her to (I lifted my cheek and let one buck her direction), and in turn she belched louder than a back firing car. Nice family. So polite and lady-like.:blushing: At then to laugh at each other to boot...:noway: Mother of the Year-FER SHER!:bigsmile:
  • keiko
    keiko Posts: 2,919 Member
    Depending on the vocalarity of the "queef", we've also asked "who stepped on a duck?":laugh: My daughter-16, was just nagging at me so I told her to (I lifted my cheek and let one buck her direction), and in turn she belched louder than a back firing car. Nice family. So polite and lady-like.:blushing: At then to laugh at each other to boot...:noway: Mother of the Year-FER SHER!:bigsmile:

    We could have a mother/daughter retreat:laugh: Give my youngest 19yrs a root beer and that girl can BURP!
  • hmo4
    hmo4 Posts: 1,673 Member
    I was at Sport Chek today buying some new w/o shorts and I SWEAR the girl behind the counter let one pop!! No nose plugging and mouth breathing though.I smerked as she was so nonchalont about it, AND she was heavier than me, AND she was 1/2 my age! How 'bout that! Today's been a good day!:bigsmile: :laugh:
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