We broke up because...

126902692269426952696

Replies

  • Hoax89
    Hoax89 Posts: 221 Member
    Would only watch Friends. I was a Seinfeld gal....
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    I was less hung up on the gal part than the Seinfeld part!! 🥴
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    She liked gals with hung parts named Seinfeld or something like that
  • Hoax89
    Hoax89 Posts: 221 Member
    Never hung up their clothes. Expected me to do every single chore.
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    She said I felt like a chore to her
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    Everyone except me knew what she felt like
  • AdahPotatah2024
    AdahPotatah2024 Posts: 2,273 Member
    He had issues with touching and had to keep his hands wrapped up at all times.
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    Kept buying me winter gloves
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    He refused to donate any of the 368 pairs of gloves his ex gifted him
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    She thought they were gloves :#
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Had the strangest mementos from previous partners made into a sculpture for our living room. Called the piece “Love Lasts; Lovers Leave”. I took the hint and left leaving nothing behind to be remembered by.
  • cmsienk
    cmsienk Posts: 18,902 Member
    She said she was just going for a walk, then took off with my coffee pot and never came back
  • Hoax89
    Hoax89 Posts: 221 Member
    He always reeked of pot
  • AdahPotatah2024
    AdahPotatah2024 Posts: 2,273 Member
    Didn't like my new favorite Garden Mist Cologne (by Willie Nelson)
  • cmsienk
    cmsienk Posts: 18,902 Member
    Didn't share my love of potatoes. (And my last S.O. kept calling me a guy. That's not how I identify.)
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    Had a weird friend named potatoes and people think she's a He hippie
  • cmsienk
    cmsienk Posts: 18,902 Member
    Didn't understand the different between funny and hurtful
  • Hoax89
    Hoax89 Posts: 221 Member
    Always laughed loudly at inappropriate times
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    Got mad because i blew milk out of my nose at a bereavement dinner
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Had this whole “waste not, want not” lifestyle where even spilled milk was used again 🤢
  • AdahPotatah2024
    AdahPotatah2024 Posts: 2,273 Member
    She got upset when I told her it was a waste of time to cry over spilt milk...and then accused me of this whole “waste not, want not” lifestyle!
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    After i blew the milk out of my nose, she got down in the floor and sucked it up with a straw.
  • AdahPotatah2024
    AdahPotatah2024 Posts: 2,273 Member
    After losing his chance on Jeopardy, he started practicing to be interviewed on "Hot Ones". He ate his chicken wings just like Conan O'Brien did, the current champion, and I had to clean up his mess with a wet vac...which he said was my straw. He laughed so hard at his own joke that more milk was spilt. I was so grossed out!
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    Her nickname was wet vac. They suck everything. Don't get me wrong.. that suction power is nice until they're cleaning up everyones messes.
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    There was an ever present feeling of knowing them from a past life and I couldn’t quite put my finger on who…until the mystery of it all drove me away!!
  • Hoax89
    Hoax89 Posts: 221 Member
    Constantly wanted to dig up the past and couldn't enjoy the present.
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Didn’t understand my fascination with cemeteries…
  • maplesyrupandchicken
    maplesyrupandchicken Posts: 92 Member
    Had a lot of skeletons in her closet. Literally.
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    Didn’t value keeping loved ones as close as I did. It’s too bad. I had the prime spot in the closet reserved for them.
  • AdahPotatah2024
    AdahPotatah2024 Posts: 2,273 Member
    Her tiny house obsessions..