How soon do you delete people that have not logged in

Options
mommymovingmountains
mommymovingmountains Posts: 192 Member
in Chit-Chat
I have not logged in for about a week because a friend suffered a horrible tragedy and honestly I could have easily slipped into my old eating patterns with comfort foods but I came back and logged in only to find many people "unfriended" me. While I understand wanting to focus on friends that are committed and log in daily I would think those that are gone for a month or more might be subject to "unfriending." I am curious, what is your time limit?

I am ok with it though because I truly appreciate those friends that have supported me through an absence....thank you friends :)
«1345

Replies

  • mommymovingmountains
    mommymovingmountains Posts: 192 Member
    Options
    I should have posted this in the question section but I believe that support is one of the keys to success :)
  • catwrangler
    catwrangler Posts: 918 Member
    Options
    If you will be gone for any length of time you need to note this on your PROFILE wall so people know you will be back eventually.

    I delete after 30 days inactive unless I see an explanation.
  • Tangerine302
    Tangerine302 Posts: 1,509 Member
    Options
    I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's tragedy. I don't think I'd delete anyone for not logging in. I don't delete my friends in real life for not talking to them for a week.
  • Missmaggieann
    Missmaggieann Posts: 68 Member
    Options
    I don't have a time limit on this, actually if I notice that ysomeone hasnt logged in I send a message to see if all is well. I may unfriend someone for not being supportive or rude but not for not being able to log in.
  • defygravity531
    defygravity531 Posts: 289 Member
    Options
    Unless I know them in person, like my boyfriend or my friend Gretchen who are both on here, I delete people after 2 weeks or so of them not logging in.

    I want to be friends with people who are as dedicated and motivated as I am.
  • crazylizz
    crazylizz Posts: 47 Member
    Options
    Interesting! I never thought of unfriending some one just because they hadn't logged in.
  • Drunkadelic
    Drunkadelic Posts: 948 Member
    Options
    Um, I've yet to delete someone for not logging in for awhile. It's not like they are hurting anything....
  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,069 Member
    Options
    I just went through last night and deleted everyone that hadn't logged in over 6 months. A week can happen to anyone...life happens sometimes a week at a time!
  • sculley
    sculley Posts: 2,012 Member
    Options
    I have never unfriended anyone even if they have slipped and haven't logged in...we are only human and friendship should be alittle stronger than that
  • Drunkadelic
    Drunkadelic Posts: 948 Member
    Options
    Interesting! I never thought of unfriending some one just because they hadn't logged in.

    I know right? sheesh rough crowd!
  • marathonmom72
    marathonmom72 Posts: 191 Member
    Options
    I had a similar situation while I was gone on vacation. Different circumstances pop up in people's lives. Sometimes you are able to be supportive to others, but sometimes you are the one needing support. I never randomly delete someone. When I've noticed that they haven't logged on in awhile, I send them a private message asking if they are alright and leaving a word of encouragement. Once I've heard back from them I can make a decision based on the response I get. This isn't just about what I get from everyone, it's about what I am able to give too.
  • tambink
    tambink Posts: 349
    Options
    I wait for a month then I delete because sometimes there is reasons people cant be on for a week or a few days.
  • TubbsMcGee
    TubbsMcGee Posts: 1,058 Member
    Options
    I'm sorry to hear about your friend...completely understandable that you wouldn't care to log your food, or that you didn't have time to log into MFP!

    I typically give people about 30+ days before I delete them. People here seem to forget that sometimes "pals" will be absent from the site due to personal issues preventing them from logging in, or even people taking a vacation and not being able to track their calories because they don't have access to a computer with internet.

    My only other means for deleting a "friend" would be that I don't find them supportive, they consistently treat MFP as a personal networking site like Facebook (giving random stupid updates about nothing pertaining to being fit/eating healthy), or if they constantly mention inappropriate matters in their posts.

    :flowerforyou:

    edited to include that I also send them a message or write on their wall to ask if they're ok!
  • cheeksv
    cheeksv Posts: 521 Member
    Options
    I told people I would be gone for a month and still lost friends. I do not delete anyone to be honest becasue when they do come back they might need some extra support. I would rather be there for them and I find having the max number of active and supportive friends can be exhausting. It is nice to have a mix of people who are logging and chatting everyday and people who come on with good advice once in a while.

    I just remembered I did delete one person. There posts were just fishing for compliments and attention. Never real support so I deleted them.
  • Tangerine302
    Tangerine302 Posts: 1,509 Member
    Options
    You can still be dedicated to losing weight without being on the computer daily. Vacations happen, visiting friends and family, and just plain life. Doesn't mean you aren't watching what you eat. You can have someone on the computer daily and not being dedicated to losing weight.
  • jlewis2896
    jlewis2896 Posts: 763 Member
    Options
    I'll delete people that log in inconsistently ONLY if they don't really offer support or I don't feel like I'm on the same 'wavelength' as them regarding nutrition and fitness.

    I accept all friend request, but I really like to limit my #of friends so that I can actually pay attention to what is going on in their lives. So deleting people who are inactive/inconsistent is a way for me to stay more focused on my other friends and offer better support.

    I am awfully sorry to hear about what you've been going through. Great job for getting back on the site!!
  • MaryK71
    MaryK71 Posts: 10
    Options
    Haven't deleted anyone yet as I only have a few friends on here. add me as a friend if you like. I am 39 and trying to get healthy before that big birthday coming up for me very soon. Hope your friend is doing better! If you were deleted, count it as a blessing.
  • cloneme_losehalf
    cloneme_losehalf Posts: 356 Member
    Options
    I don't "unfriend" anyone for months. I know there are reasons people can not post or log in. I do not choose the people I "friend" just so I can get a "wtg", "good job", "awesome", "nice burn" etc. They are choosen because we had the same goal in mind. I don't let who does or doesn't post worry me. I post what I can, when I can. I comment when I can, but I don't have time to comment to every post and I don't expect others to also. Just like one of my "friends" said today, if someone is only looking for me to be a daily cheering support to boost ego then they are not a match for me.
  • NovemberJune
    NovemberJune Posts: 2,525 Member
    Options
    It depends. If someone just added me like 2 days ago and then they don't log in for a week, I'll delete them. I just figure they tried out MFP and decided it wasn't for them. If someone has been my "friend" for a little while and has been supporting me and I them, then I wouldn't delete them. I might post on their page "how are you?" or something. but there are lots of people who just go add crazy and then quit mfp the next week. lol
  • mamaredhead
    mamaredhead Posts: 112
    Options
    Well, if anyone does NOT EVER give me feedback on my diary, my exercises and my posts I delete them. Time is not that much of a factor, because there are people that sometimes don't do much more for weeks than just logging their food or stay completely offline, just like you had to. Sorry to hear about your friend, btw. But if they don't seem interested in my work as much as I am trying to show interest in theirs -- goodbye. I don't need MANY friends but GOOD friends. Just like in real life.

    But whoever deleted you: You need the people in your life that need you in theirs, so don't be mad or sorry or disappointed. There's a whole bunch of us mfp-peeps still out there ready to give you support and be NEW friends to you if you want to and need to have more of us around.

    Good luck with your journey! Keep up the good work!!!

Categories