YOUR SO PRETTY!! ...(FOR A FAT GIRL)

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  • martinbeks
    martinbeks Posts: 255 Member
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    OK HERES A QUESTION FOR YOU. I STRUGGLE WITH THIS EVERY DAY. DH SAYS IT DOESNT MATTER TO HI IF I LOSE WEIGHT AND HE " DOESNT WANT ME DOING FOR HIM" MY SIL IS SUPER AGAINST IT TOO. SUGGESTIONS ?

    Do it for you and no one else. Think about your own health. I know your family cares about you, but with that, they should also want you to be happy and healthy.
  • REBEE17
    REBEE17 Posts: 101 Member
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    I get told this quite often...and I hate it.
  • faiga
    faiga Posts: 47
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    Your lucky that he accepts you and loves you for who you are not many men do that however do it for yourself so that you can be healthy and happy dont do it for anyone else and make sure to tell them that you want their support regardless of the fact that they dont want you to do it for them because they should support you no matter what you choose
  • Bridge_CG
    Bridge_CG Posts: 435 Member
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    You know, the people who say stuff like that, that's usually how they feel about themselves. Once a guy that I was "in love" with in high school told my "best friend" that he would date me if I lost 40 pounds and toned up. Really man? Now that we're both in college now and I see what I could've had... Which isn't very lovely... I feel so much better about myself. I've lost about 20 pounds within the past year, and I've gained about 15 pounds of muscle. So, remember, whenever some one says to you, "you're so pretty for a fat girl", generally that's how they feel about themselves. So, brush it off and move on. :) I think you're gorgeous anyway you look at it.
  • MelissaL582
    MelissaL582 Posts: 1,422 Member
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    I used to get that from my hubby. He would tell me I was pretty but then grabbed on my flab and say something like "now to work on this". It hurt but he was right, I needed to lose weight.. BUT I lost the weight because I wanted to, not for him. I decided it was time to get the tire off.
  • Christine7280
    Christine7280 Posts: 3
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    Girl...... I get the same response from everyone or I also get the" why couldn't I met you when you were smaller back in high school.
  • faiga
    faiga Posts: 47
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    that quote sucks. someone once said to me if you lose 20 pounds id so go out with you lets just say that person is history
  • TheKitsune6
    TheKitsune6 Posts: 5,798 Member
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    I've gotten that a few times. I didn't get offended because I knew it was true. I did/do have a cute face, but my body showed that I was unhealthy in many different ways and that's NOT attractive. I actually get more annoyed when people lie and say "Nooo, I don't think you're fat!" BS, I have a mirror, stupid.
  • philOHIO
    philOHIO Posts: 520 Member
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    I have always preferred heavier women over that thin, stick figure, twiggy types. I think most guys feel the same way, but the model industry doesn't think so, unfortunately.
  • ctalimenti
    ctalimenti Posts: 865 Member
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    another one that get's me is my husband tells me "You're so hot now" I'm like "WTF? I wasn't before? all I did was drop weight."

    Well, let's be honest - we're not as attractive fat.
    That's reality.

    And our souses or partners' loyalty has limits - believe it.
    I know a guy RIGHT NOW who is a great father, loving husband and totally loving human being in every way but very fat.
    He wasn't always fat but gained slowly over the years while his wife stayed the same.

    You know where this is going - right?

    Yes, she had an torrid affair with a guy at work - a fit guy, and she moved out, leaving my poor friend alone with his broken heart and twinkies.

    And instead of just accepting that his wife is no longer in love, he's crying and sniveling, trying to get her back; it's pathetic!
    He should be on MFP - hitting the gym and rebuilding his life.
  • Zee48
    Zee48 Posts: 789 Member
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    I have heard that statement many times before and I always thought 'how stupid are you?' Size has nothing to do with beauty. That comes from inside, just like ugly does.

    I borrowed this from a lady here a few weeks ago and I love it. Stupid remarks like that deserve something like this: "Bless your heart Darling. Do you realize you said that outloud? You must be so embarrassed. Let's just both pretend you didn't say that.”

    or “I may be fat but I can lose weight – what is your remedy for stupid?”

    or this one that my DH used to tell the stupid truck drivers who used rude & crude language on the CB “did your Momma have any kids that lived?”

    None of these are totally rude or offensive, yet they get across a message.
  • KariQuiteContrary
    KariQuiteContrary Posts: 274 Member
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    Either I'm completely oblivious or I just naturally drift towards people who wouldn't say this sort of thing - can't believe that people think it's ok to say that sort of stuff!

    I'd say back I can fix my weight but you'll still have a vile personality, what are you going to do about that?

    THIS! My thoughts exactly. :)
  • DonnaLFitz
    DonnaLFitz Posts: 270 Member
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    My mom still says such things. Not just about my weight, but my makeup, hair, clothes, fill-in-the-blank.

    But it's not about me -- it's her projecting her body insecurities on me.

    I lost weight because I wanted to feel better and not be in pain. And I wanted to look and feel better in clothes. End of story.
  • mmmichelle8486
    mmmichelle8486 Posts: 269 Member
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    I get your really pretty for a black girl..... Wow Ook so if I was white I would be ugly!? lol,


    ^^ This. I get this all the time. I get "Your pretty for a black girl" or "You have a pretty complexion for a DARK skinned girl" <--- this one bothers me the most... I just don't understand. I get these two sayings the most all the time and even till this day I get something along those lines :/


    The both of you are gorgeous, for any color :)
  • heatherhills
    heatherhills Posts: 5
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    YES!!!
    The "pretty face" thing is CLASSIC-- i AGREE.
    I have also been through it!
    You are a beautiful young lady-- from head to toe. :)
  • bjshields
    bjshields Posts: 677 Member
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    The only question is, do YOU want to lose weight? Do YOU feel good, like how you look, feel confident in your own skin? The answers to these questions start and end with YOU. Good luck to you!:smile:
  • ctalimenti
    ctalimenti Posts: 865 Member
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    Kinda screwed that quote up but, yes it's reality.
  • sabrinag6005
    sabrinag6005 Posts: 14
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    It does matter to him, he just is smart enough not to tell you the truth. All men want to have a prize on their arm since that is what society tells THEM matters. Not your heart, brains, charachter, just your looks it's terrible but you ask any man, they'll tell you the first thing they ask other guys about a gf/wife, is she hot? The thing is, you have to find it in yourself to make up your mind to get healthy with or without his support. So when the hard times come and it's easier to give in, you can stay the course YOU set before yourself. Alot of times men out of fear or insecurity don't want you to lose weight, they are deep down afraid to lose you, and will sabbotage your efforts so be careful and again remember this is about YOU not him or anyone else.
  • crazyellybean
    crazyellybean Posts: 999 Member
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    Yup, gotta love it, the usualy "But you have such a pretty face" which btw will change as you lose weight, so what good does that do you! LOL
  • gburkhart2
    gburkhart2 Posts: 72 Member
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    another one that get's me is my husband tells me "You're so hot now" I'm like "WTF? I wasn't before? all I did was drop weight."

    I didn't read through all the posts to see if anyone's said this yet, but it's not necessarily about the weight. All of us, women & men, are more confident about ourselves (in almost every aspect of our lives) when WE think we look good. Confidence, not arrogance, is sexy.

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