Baby help! Going a bit crazy!
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And don't know if you swaddle or not but this is a lifesaver and works, WONDERS!
Halo sleep sack. Invest in one if you don't have one, like go right now!0 -
She does have lullaby sound stuffed animals and they calm her down a bit but it never lasts. She starts crying about 5 minutes after I'm out of the room, spits out her pacifier and ignores the music. Like right now, I checked in on her after 20 minutes of crying, I came out of the room at 10:50 (my time) and five minutes later she already has spit out her binky and is crying. She's been at it for the last ten minutes. She's not hungry and I changed her diaper not an hour ago.
How long can a baby cry for?
She can't pick the binky up and put it back in herself, could be that she wants the binky back? Drove me crazy ... but seems like every 15-20 minutes I had to pop the binky back in my son's mouth! 2 months is still a little young and your not hurting anything at this point by holding her and comforting her.0 -
Maybe she's just not ready for that crib. Two months old is pretty soon to be separated from Mom at night all night. Maybe not for you, but for her. Maybe a smoother transition? When I put my little one in her crib in her own room I slept in the room with her for a while (well, I will admit, I was having trouble with the separation, too--and her room was far away from ours at the time which is scary to a new mom) to ease the transition for both of us. If something like that won't work, maybe she is trying to let you know of another need she has--hunger, gas, ect. For the first year it felt like trial and error when she woke up in the night--something ended up being a solution, we just had to find it (which sucks at 3 A.M. and you are insanely exhausted). Babies this age cry as it is their only way to communicate need--I know you know this, I just have to try and cover as many bases as I can so this is helpful even a little? Good luck, I hope you all have a 'silent night' soon.
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And don't know if you swaddle or not but this is a lifesaver and works, WONDERS!
Halo sleep sack. Invest in one if you don't have one, like go right now!
These are awesome... no kicking off the blanket and getting cold. LOVE LOVE LOVE THEM!0 -
I don't know what it's called but this worked with both of mine... couple nights of hell and you'll be done, BUT YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW THRU...
Put her in bed - leave the room close the door (or whatever your routine will be) and set a timer for 5 minutes. In 5 minutes if she is up and fussing go in without turning on lights and pat her and try to sooth her for no more than 30 seconds, but DO NOT PICK HER UP. Leave the room and set a timer for 10 minutes and repeat this process adding 5 minutes at a time until she has gone to sleep. It took me two nights and we only got through 4 sessions before they were out and once they learn how to sooth themself you'll be better off. I would never recommend letting a child cry unless you know for certain their needs have been met (fed, warm, clean diaper) - so as long as she is just mad this technique will work. Most everyone I know has used it to some degree or another with good results. It is hard as a mom to hear them crying and know how simple it is to pick them up and make them happy, but letting her learn how to sooth herself is a gift and the sooner she learns it the better. I know you say this hasn't worked, but it just hasn't worked YET - because you have eventually given in she has learned that if she crys long enough you will rescue her, you have to teach her that it won't work... Believe me, she will eventually fall asleep even if it takes an hour.
That being said, she is your child and you have to do whatever you are comfortable doing. I will tell you that I had a friend that found this method cruel and had a 14 month old still waking her up at 2am every morning for a bottle! She finally decided she had to follow thru and doing this method at 14 months is definitely tougher - the longer you wait the more ingrained the habit is to break.
Good luck!
THIS! I used this method for all four of my babies. If your baby is sleeping for 4-5 hours at a time, it should work. If less, she might need a few more weeks.
I followed the advice of a Parenting magazine article called, "Teach your child to sleep in 7 days". You might be able to still find it on their website.
Establish a routine: Change diaper, feeding, put in crib AWAKE. Crying wil ensue. Soothe and comfort with voice/touch but do not pick up. I went in every five minutes with my first one and he cried for 65 minutes but fell asleep on his own
The next night, we repeated the process and he cried for 15 minutes. Within 4 days , he was falling asleep within minutes.
But if you really feel like she's not getting it after an hour or so, she may not be ready. Just know( as I'm sure you do) that babies under a year are in no danger of "spoiling". Let me know if I can help further.0 -
I agree completely! Letting a 2 1/2 month old CIO is abusive. Think of what they've gone through in the past few months! I'd be crying too!I think 2.5 months is WAY to young to let her "cry it out" We are just doing that now with my 8 month old. At this point when a new born cries there is prob something wrong. I would try gripe water for gas, tylenol for possible teething pain, and swadling.
Just my opinion..
I have 2 boys who are older now but were also very large (1 lbs 11oz and 9 lbs 8 oz. The 2nd one was 2 weeks early.) On the plus side, that helped them sleep through the night much sooner because size wise they were the size of a 6mo when they were 2mo. Right now your baby needs you to feel secure. You cannot spoil an infant. If the baby is too young to understand that when you are not in their sight that doesn't mean you don't exist then they are too young to go through CIO.
Babies cry. It's what they do. It might mean they are bored or over stimulated or hungry or gassy or wet or dirty or constipated or over tired or lonely or in pain or tey have an itch or they miss you or they're afraid or any number of other things. You can't say "Well, he's changed, fed, and I cuddled him. That's all I can do." That's just mean at that age.
Trust me, before you know it they will be too big to cuddle and you'll wish you could have a few sleepless nights in exchange for a bit more time with them as a baby.0 -
they make things for when ur baby starts rolling tht supposed to keep em on there back but mayby if u got one it wud make the baby feel cuddled in0
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We used this seahorse has backgroudn music. It barely glows so this was the only light in the room when we would rock her to sleep. Also, a great item to have.
Or the slumber bear! Also a lifesaver! I would leave this in her crib when she fell asleep and if she woke up this would automatic sense movement and start up helping her fall back asleep!
nvented by a doctor, and effectively used in hospital nurseries for over 25 years! The Original Slumber Bear contains the ONLY actual intra-uterine, recorded womb sound to help lull your Baby to sleep in minutes! Each Original Slumber Bear also arrives with its own Silkie!0 -
That young you aren't spoiling them. They are not doing it for attention. Swaddle, rock to sleep, give them a bottle right before sleep, or a pacifier. My daughter went down effortlessly with just a pacifier. I would give her her last bottle, give her a bath put her in bed swaddled with a pacifier. I didn't put her in her own room in her crib until 4-5 months. I had a portacrib thingy beside my bed. But that young I would definitely swaddle. the Halo Sleep sack is AMAZING! So easy to swaddle! Thats the best purchase ever! YOu can also nurse to sleep if the baby is bottle fed. But at this age, comforting them IS NOT bad. And most experts do not recommend the "cry it out" method this young.
http://www.target.com/p/Halo-Fleece-Swaddle-Sleepsack-in-Sage-Newborn/-/A-13334660
YOu might try the "babywise method" that's what I did. Regulating naps, wake time, and bedtime is KEY in my opinion.
I followed it loosely. What I did was have a set time I fed her every morning. Was usually 730 800 am. then every 3 hours i fed her. I premade my bottles the night before. her last feeding was like at 800. I gave her a bath, swaddled her and laid her down. Her "wake time" I didn't just put her to sleep with a bottle. Some people say nap all the time they want, but a little wake time for a baby is a good thing. If my baby acted hungry I fed her, but because I was feeding her every 3 hours she wasn't hungry.0 -
Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child - Dr. Marc Weissbluth.
Every parent should have a copy of this book. It details what sleep pattern to expectat each age, newborn to teenagers. It teaches how to sleep train and when, possible problems that could arise and how to deal with them. And how many hours of sleep each age needs at night and during naps, etc.
Seriously, everyone can benefit from this book. And I also love the swaddler sleep sacks. Keeps them snug. :-)
Your baby is acting very typical for her age. At least you know its normal. :-)0 -
i might sound mean, but i just let her cry! if nothing was wrong with her and she was just crying to cry, i just let her. she's 6 now... perfectly healthy, secure, happy, and never slept a single night in my bed! my bed is mine, its not the "family" bed.0
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Run, don't walk to your nearest bookseller or go to Amazon and get a book titled "On Becoming Baby Wise" http://amzn.to/s29ycK . This book is a great baby sleep advice book. It's never to early to start training yourself and your baby is about the age where this book becomes extremely useful. We have a 5 month old little girl who began sleeping through the night at 10-12 weeks. There is a middle ground between "crying it out" and "running to the rescue" and this attempts to help you find the right balance. It was recommended to us by about a half dozen mothers. My wife read the book, I listened to the audio book version. I can not recommend it more highly. And you tailor the advice to what works for you.
Swaddling is also essential. It gives the baby the sense of "womb comfort", but swaddling is a must for as long as your baby will allow it. Most experts suggest to stop at 3-4 months, so you don't have a lot of time left to swaddle. Our little girl kicked her way out of the swaddle at 2 months, so the fun didn't last very long. And both you and the father should try it, at least one of you will have the nack for it. My wife made me do it all the time because she said I swaddled our little girl up like a burrito.
Lastly, don't lose heart. Remember "this too shall pass." If it seems like nothing is helping, trust your instincts. If you feel like something is wrong, talk with your pediatrician. It could be colic or something else. Or she could need something in the room to soothe her (like classical music or a night light). Good luck and enjoy this time, because before you know it ... she will be all grown up.0 -
I have NEVER used Cry it out method and my child only wakes up in the middle of the night teething. She is cutting her one year molars and just felt them poking through a little bit (hence why she has been fussy!) For instance. last night she woke up at 1 am. I went in there picked her up, gave her Tylenol (i knew she was teething could see the top too but now the molars makes things 10x worse) I found her pacifier (she couldn't find it) I gave her her special blanket and left the room. It took 5 minutes and she went back to sleep. No "cry it out". I am of the firm belief that most babies only cry when they need something. My daughter is 15 months. She is sort of in between. She can work the system, but she is not old enough to clearly know "I want to get up and party tonight" so to speak.
My husband believes in Cry it out, however, he was deployed the first 9 months of her life so I have essentially raised her from infancy. For instance, one night she woke up. I did the routine of pacifier, special blanket, etc. She was still screaming!!! I laid there for about 5-10 min. My husband was like, "DONT YOU DARE GO IN THERE!!" We actually fought about it. I said, "I don't care what YOU say I am going in there!!! Sure enough, she had a POOPY diaper. IF I had listened to him, she would have festered in her poop all night and probably had a horrible diaper rash!! (By the way, night poops are not normal for her so you should always think, 'hungry, poopy, in pain, cold, hot" check those first!
Maybe she is still hungry? Babies her age should be getting a certain amount, and if you breast feed always try to put her on the nipple to see if that is what it is!!!!??0 -
ThisIm maybe not the person to answer...lol........neither my husband or I ever ever let either of our girls cry themselves to sleep. Just couldnt do it. Sure it was a pain at time, just rocked them til they fell asleep, and put them to bed. Did swap from sheets in their cribs to fleece....so the bed didnt feel so cold to them...I think it helped!! Haha...........Good luck. They are only babies for a bit, you can get through it no matter what you do,it wont last forever. And no...my kids didnt sleep with me up until they hit Jr High....lol....I did have them in my room in their crib, one until she was one, one at 8 months before they went in their own rooms
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Even betterI have to say... at two months, you should just hold her and love her and hold her and love her until she gets to sleep and work on sleep training later. A child this young absolutely does not have the mindset to manipulate you. What she craves is human affection and an attachment to you-which she will gain by you holding her a lot. Enjoy her and hold her as much as you can now-before long, she won't want you because she'll want to explore!! She's still so little... she has spent 9 months being carried around by you and it is what she knows. She's scared without you.... it's not manupulative, its survival technique. Leaving babies to cry for even short periods of time at that age has been proven to be detrimental to infant mental health.
All 3 of our babies have slept with us, they don't want to do it forever. Enjoy it while you can 0 -
Be VERY wary of any book or "doctor" or anecdotes about people who "trained" their 3mo to sleep through the night. They didn't. What they did was train the baby that no one is there for them and they are on their own. The baby gave up on having their needs met. It's cruel. Oh sure, some kids will be just fine. Some kids of crack *kitten* go on to be college graduates too. That doesn't mean a crack *kitten* is a good mother.
Babies don't "cry just to cry" anymore than an adult cries just to cry. It's their only means of communication. They can't scratch their leg if it itches or say "Mommy, my tummy hurts." That doesn't mean they need to co-sleep or even sleep in the same room. Neither of our boys did. I tried to co-sleep with kid1 for 2 nights. I didn't get a bit of sleep. Everythiem hubby or baby moved I jolted awake. I was worried I'd roll onto him, hubby would roll onto him, the cat would jump up on him, the blanket would smother him, etc. By the 3rd day I was disoriented and borderline hallucinating I was so exhausted. I put him in his crib that night and we all slept much better after that.0 -
Be VERY wary of any book or "doctor" or anecdotes about people who "trained" their 3mo to sleep through the night. They didn't. What they did was train the baby that no one is there for them and they are on their own. The baby gave up on having their needs met. It's cruel. Oh sure, some kids will be just fine. Some kids of crack *kitten* go on to be college graduates too. That doesn't mean a crack *kitten* is a good mother.
Babies don't "cry just to cry" anymore than an adult cries just to cry. It's their only means of communication. They can't scratch their leg if it itches or say "Mommy, my tummy hurts." That doesn't mean they need to co-sleep or even sleep in the same room. Neither of our boys did. I tried to co-sleep with kid1 for 2 nights. I didn't get a bit of sleep. Everythiem hubby or baby moved I jolted awake. I was worried I'd roll onto him, hubby would roll onto him, the cat would jump up on him, the blanket would smother him, etc. By the 3rd day I was disoriented and borderline hallucinating I was so exhausted. I put him in his crib that night and we all slept much better after that.
She isn't asking how to get her baby to sleep throught the night, she is asking how to get her child to fall asleep on her own... very different. I think relating parents that allow their children to learn to self sooth to crack *kitten* is a bit extreme - there are many ways to parent successfully.
PS - many 3 month olds are large enough to sleep through the night (6-7 hours) without feeding. There is no cookie cutter way to parent every baby.0 -
Some of these responses are scaring me and making me very sad for many babies....
many.
http://www.drmomma.org/2010/02/sleep-training-higher-stress-lower.html
http://urbanext.illinois.edu/baby/whenwillbaby.cfm
http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/fussy-baby/science-says-excessive-crying-could-be-harmful
My babies have all been held almost constantly for the first six months (except their daily tummy time and occasional moments when I'd lie them down during a sleep so I could get a few things done around the house), and they are the most independent, well adjusted children. I see other kids that are clingy and scared half to death to let their parents get two feet from them. I'm sure those are children who weren't held enough as teeny tiny babies. They are afraid if their parent gets too far away, they may not respond to them. *smh*
http://www.kidsdevelopment.co.uk/BabiesAttention.html
http://ezinearticles.com/?Night-Feedings-by-Age-and-When-to-Night-Wean-a-Baby&id=45689560 -
And don't know if you swaddle or not but this is a lifesaver and works, WONDERS!
Halo sleep sack. Invest in one if you don't have one, like go right now!
Like minds think alike...I was just about to post this exact one. Trust me, swaddling helps. I would also suggest some ambient music and some sort of soft night light. I noticed with my children in their baby years would sleep better and go to sleep better when I was breastfeeding but when I switched over to formula it caused some of those wonderful crying forever nights. Not sure if that's really related but just throwing it out there.
Swaddling or sleep sack, music or even a children's story, and mood lighting are all worth a try.0 -
Two months is really young to expect a lot in the sleep department. You asked for ideas/opinions though: So mine is that at this point, I would keep experimenting outside of the "cry it out" department. Pick your battle - save that one for when you need it, and I wouldn't think a 2 month old is ready for the "cry it out". Every kid/parent is different though! At 2 months, this is the time to experiment in what makes you/baby/daddy the happiest - get to know what soothes your new little family member!
If it's co-sleeping, rocking, using a binkie, swaddling, whatever. Do whatever you have to do to keep the peace...be creative It pays off. Sleep is CRUCIAL to everyone's well-being. Yours, the babies, the dad's. Life feels a lot better when everyone is rested. I vote for creativity over crying it out. Use your new mommy-senses to feel your way through this, take a deep breath and trust yourself!
Congrats, by the way 0 -
As quite a few people have already said every parent goes about this differently. For me I kept my son, he's nine months old now, in his bassinet for 6 weeks and put him in his crib when I went back to work. He did not like it at first because it was different but now hates sleeping anywhere else. Do you have a mattress pad? It could be a difference of how comfortable your child is. It certainly was for my son. Also don't start a routine i.e. rocking, having them sleep with you, etc unless your willing to do it until they are 2 years to 4 years old. My brother-in-law's child is 5 and they can't seem to get her to go the whole night without climbing in bed with them. I wouldn't want to set a precedent of taking your child to bed with you unless it is something you would like to do. All that being said, when Alan would cry when I put him down for a nap/for the night I did the same things, changed his diaper, cuddled him, etc and then laid him down. If he started crying I would go in and check on him, not picking him up, I would rub his hair (it seemed to soothe him) give him his binkie, and leave the room. If he continued to cry I would wait a few minutes, go back in and repeat. And so on and so forth for longer and longer times of waiting. I think he maybe only once or twice went more than three checks. I know it's hard but it gets easier. I think the hardest part for me to realize was not every cry meant feed me. I highly suggest finding a schedule/routine that works for your baby and stick with it. It really pays off in the long run. And again, it really does get easier, I didn't think I was going to survive that first week.0
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Be VERY wary of any book or "doctor" or anecdotes about people who "trained" their 3mo to sleep through the night. They didn't. What they did was train the baby that no one is there for them and they are on their own. The baby gave up on having their needs met. It's cruel. Oh sure, some kids will be just fine. Some kids of crack *kitten* go on to be college graduates too. That doesn't mean a crack *kitten* is a good mother.
Babies don't "cry just to cry" anymore than an adult cries just to cry. It's their only means of communication. They can't scratch their leg if it itches or say "Mommy, my tummy hurts." That doesn't mean they need to co-sleep or even sleep in the same room. Neither of our boys did. I tried to co-sleep with kid1 for 2 nights. I didn't get a bit of sleep. Everythiem hubby or baby moved I jolted awake. I was worried I'd roll onto him, hubby would roll onto him, the cat would jump up on him, the blanket would smother him, etc. By the 3rd day I was disoriented and borderline hallucinating I was so exhausted. I put him in his crib that night and we all slept much better after that.
my 3 month old slept from 12am- 7am daily and i am not a "crack *kitten*". :laugh:0 -
Oh and I almost completely forgot the most important thing I did/do as soon as your baby shows a sleep "cue" yawning, rubbing the eyes, even a sleepy look, stick them in bed!!!!! Seriously, babies need lots of sleep and it really helps if you put your baby asleep while they are still awake but sleepy. Not when they are overtired. They will cry more and fight harder because they are tired and don't know how to put themselves to sleep yet. My sister once told me the best thing I could ever do was help my child learn how to soothe themselves.0
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what i love to do to my baby nephew is wrap me in blanket...and stand up and hold him and rock him in my arms within mins he is sleeping...but i still keep him in my arms for another 20mins than lay him down and rock the crib a little he was like that to with his crib his mommy was stressed! and since im pregnant i wanna get experience lol so i offered to help with him! so far he likes me!! good luck hun! 0
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I have 4 children aged 20 down to 19 months. I am a FIRM believer the more a baby is held and spoken to and cuddled, the more they thrive. Swaddling is excellent. As young as your daughter is, being put in the crib could scare her. Bassinets are small enclosures, cribs are openly huge in comparison.
Yahoo published an article today on the very subject of the cry-it-out debate. Here is the link: http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/crying-dangerous-kids-one-expert-says-222400379.html
There were more than a few occasions where I was so glad I checked on my children when they 'should have been sleeping'. I have never regretted being close to them or soothing them. That point of childhood does not last long. I could never allow an infant to cry for a 30 minute stretch alone in a room, especially if the crying intensified. That is a signal of true distress. To me its simply cruel.0 -
Two-months is too young for the tough love approach. You are a slave to these little bundles of id. Best bet is to let her fall asleep in your bed, then slip her into her bed, so she will get used to waking up there.
I'm on my fourth kid; they are each different, but once you have one, they are your boss.0 -
At the age she mostly just needs your attention. Have you tried putting her bassinet next to your bed so you can stick your hand in there to comfort her with your touch and smell. My son didnt go to his crib until he was 4 or 5 months old. Hes 2 now and sleeps amazingly. He was always a good sleeper but he didnt like to be far away from me. Not to mention sids I wouldnt let him get very far from my hearing distance. I feel I did the right thing in doing this with my son. I will also do this with the baby im due with in july. I'm not for tough love really. Not at this stage. Ive worked in daycares and know how hard it can be. I used to have 8 infants and I got them all on a schedule. Maybe theres some other reason (colic,etc.) Causing her to be fussing when laid down. is she gassy? Mylicon works wonders and so does gripe water.0
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Two-months is too young for the tough love approach. You are a slave to these little bundles of id. Best bet is to let her fall asleep in your bed, then slip her into her bed, so she will get used to waking up there.
I'm on my fourth kid; they are each different, but once you have one, they are your boss.
This^0 -
Two-months is too young for the tough love approach. You are a slave to these little bundles of id. Best bet is to let her fall asleep in your bed, then slip her into her bed, so she will get used to waking up there.
I'm on my fourth kid; they are each different, but once you have one, they are your boss.
Agreed.0 -
I have to say... at two months, you should just hold her and love her and hold her and love her until she gets to sleep and work on sleep training later. A child this young absolutely does not have the mindset to manipulate you. What she craves is human affection and an attachment to you-which she will gain by you holding her a lot. Enjoy her and hold her as much as you can now-before long, she won't want you because she'll want to explore!!
I'm a fan of crying it out, but i agree with this. She is FAR to young for it to be goo for her.0
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