Wow I really dont want to hear that

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  • MissFuchsia
    MissFuchsia Posts: 526 Member
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    I think people like that are either fishing for compliments or have body image issues. I'm almost at my goal and still struggling with body image. Still I would never complain about my body to someone else, especially someone bigger than me.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
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    I've noticed most people who say that in a "woe is me" kind of way are normally just fishing for compliments. So don't give it to them by saying "Oh no you're not fat!"... tell them "I thought you put on some weight".

    That's just mean.

    Yeah, I agree. Since when is it okay to be nasty to someone as long as they are thinner than you? If someone if fishing for a compliment then they probably need one. So why not give it, especially if it's a friend?
  • Destinie589
    Destinie589 Posts: 211
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    Some people have body issues. Even those who weigh 15lbs soaking wet. She probably really does think shes fat. So instead of strangling her with a belt in the corner, just concentrate on how great your looking.

    Right on!
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815
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    I get that people see their flaws. I do too. I see my flaws all the time and judge myself for them.

    But if I was to weigh 120lbs and was sitting next to a girl who was clearly over weight I would think to have the restraint to refrain from calling myself FAT in random converstation.

    If this was a friend I would of course be supportive. But I also find it rude.

    lets reverse that situation. Say a "clearly over weight" person is sitting next to someone that weighed 120lbs and was complaining about HER weight......do you think that might make the 120 lb person uncomfortable as well? Total double standard as I see it. EVERYONE has the right to talk about whatever they want-if someone doesn't like it, they can always walk away.


    Um, yes. I said that earlier. I find it equally annoying. AND I have friends who are skinny but I would NEVER say "Oh I am so fat" in front of them.

    I may think whatever I want to think but I keep that to myself. Or I wait until I am on here to vent. Or around my friends who struggle with weight and know my fat kid self.

    Its not about the walking away part. I know I could.


    I was just venting in the first place.

    I think its frustrating that someone who weights more than my left leg could call themselves fat in front of me.
  • JipsyJudy
    JipsyJudy Posts: 268 Member
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    Well, I don't agree I'm 65, and I've had up-and-down weight issues all my life. Just need to say that I think we need to APPLAUD more when people who are a little overweight want to get back in fighting trim. All my life, people have said to me, "You don't need to lose weight," even when I was 50 pounds over the top of my healthy weight bracket. I'm tall, so I don't look all that fat. My fat has always been belly fat, which is the most dangerous kind of fat and the most important kind of fat to lose. But year after year, people around me put me down for saying I was on a diet, for turning down desserts, and for doing something different than they were doing. I would lose 30 pounds and then listen to people who would say things like, "What good is a diet if you can't go off it once in a while," or "You don't look fat; how much could it hurt you to have pasta/pizza/fried shrimps/greaseburger/etc. and gain back a pound of belly fat each month. Finally, I became diabetic, and now I've stopped listening to people who tell me I'm not fat. I'm carrying about 30 pounds of dangerous, metabolically active fat around my belly and ribs right now, and it has to go. I recently got my blood sugar under control with The Insulin Resistance Diet and I intend to stay on it for the rest of my life. Excess abdominal fat is BAD, BAD, BAD for us, and I applaud and support everyone who s trying to get rid of that stuff, no matter whether others think they are fat or not. And that's second my rant for today. Happy fitness journeys, everyone.
  • leynak
    leynak Posts: 963 Member
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    Eh, it really doesn't bother me. I call myself fat all the time but I'm sure someone bigger than me would love to be my size. I also remember a time in my life(high school) where I thought I was HUGE. I was 5'6" & 140lbs. Right now I'd love to be that size again.

    So I really can't hold someone(that's healthy) thinking they're fat against them. I felt the same way once.
  • skylark94
    skylark94 Posts: 2,036 Member
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    I do see where you are coming from.

    I had to remind myself to stop talking about my weight when I am around my best friend. While I did indeed feel very fat at 166 pounds, she is probably at least 250. When I look at her I do not see an obese person, I see my beautiful best friend, but I know that she is struggling with health issues which make it very difficult to lose weight. I can only imagine how she must have felt when I called myself fat.
  • leslielt
    leslielt Posts: 113 Member
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    I've noticed most people who say that in a "woe is me" kind of way are normally just fishing for compliments. So don't give it to them by saying "Oh no you're not fat!"... tell them "I thought you put on some weight".
    haha reminds me of a funny story. my cousin (who just spent who knows how much to get her hair all done up) said oh my hair looks awful and the other person agreed with her. My cousin stood there shocked, "you shouldn't say that". So the other lady replied i was just agreeing with you oh wait you wanted me to tell you how good you looked huh

    she probably won't pull that trick again
  • Just1forMe
    Just1forMe Posts: 624 Member
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    I am 5'2" and weigh 100 pounds. I find that I see women who weigh 15 or 30 pounds more than me do not look as undesirable as I see myself. I have struggled with body image issues since I was 8 years old and have had eating disorders. It is annoying that I see myself fat, as well, because the number doesn't match the way I see myself. I would love to have normal thoughts.

    I agree with the original poster. I get that ANYONE can have body issues...I think her point is, why would you say that to ME when I obviously am much heavier than you. Keep it to yourself, because to say it to someone who obviously weighs 30-50 lbs (for example) more than you is insulting.
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815
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    Sorry but 5'2 and 130 (TO ME) is not fat.

    By any means. And if you are usually 115 that would put a LITTLE over weight.

    I wouldnt go to the extreme to say FAT.

    Again thats just me.

    And I know women have issues with their bodies. But again i was trying to say that the statement in general.

    I am not attacking women and their self image.

    I didn't take it as an attack at all :) I knew you were speaking in general, just offering my perspective as someone who fit into that group. I don't think I am fat by any means, I just have areas of my body that I have been happier with, I think most people do.

    Okay good :))
  • madameduffay
    madameduffay Posts: 166 Member
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    I've noticed most people who say that in a "woe is me" kind of way are normally just fishing for compliments. So don't give it to them by saying "Oh no you're not fat!"... tell them "I thought you put on some weight".

    LMAO. That would make her head explode!
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815
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    I am 5'2" and weigh 100 pounds. I find that I see women who weigh 15 or 30 pounds more than me do not look as undesirable as I see myself. I have struggled with body image issues since I was 8 years old and have had eating disorders. It is annoying that I see myself fat, as well, because the number doesn't match the way I see myself. I would love to have normal thoughts.

    I agree with the original poster. I get that ANYONE can have body issues...I think her point is, why would you say that to ME when I obviously am much heavier than you. Keep it to yourself, because to say it to someone who obviously weighs 30-50 lbs (for example) more than you is insulting.

    Yea that was kinda the point :))
  • MelKut
    MelKut Posts: 167 Member
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    I am 5'8" and weigh about 164 right now.... My usual weight was 175-ish and I couldn't say I was "fat" even though that's how I felt because every time I would show displeasure in my body, my older sister (about 40 lbs heavier than me, but same body frame) would harshly say "Shut up! Look at me! You're skinny!" even though I felt like I needed to make changes.

    Just because someone is smaller than you doesn't make it okay to NOT allow them to express how they feel about their body. They may be thin, but flabby.... just because they can fit into a size 2 or 0, doesn't mean they have the body they want. Instead, invite them to workout with you, give them tips on how to tone up.

    NOW, if they looked anything close to this:
    zuzana-light-body-rock-tv_163038843.jpg
    THEN kick their *kitten* :laugh:
  • cruiseking
    cruiseking Posts: 338 Member
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    People are people. We all have our peeves, and our idiosynchrosies. I think the girl that is a buck 30 wet, is fishing for affirmation. I liked it when people insinuated that I was fat. I would insinuate that being fat was something I could easily change. Now being an a**hole, that's a little tougher to change. How about the person turning 30, who bemoans it aloud, in the presence of people who are closer to 50 than 40? People are funny. I choose to be an observer, and laugh off people. We are all a "little off", in our own bizarre way. We may not think so, but others may have a different tale to tell. If you ever need a good lagh or way to boost your own feeling of well being, go to a Walmart with the express intent of being an observer of human nature. Good times!
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
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    It bothers me, too, but since I used to be that girl, I can't complain. I will try to call myself out of shape or not in as good a shape as I would like to be once I near my goal weight, though. It's more accurate.
  • RyanDanielle5101
    RyanDanielle5101 Posts: 533
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    Fat is a relative term. I can remember when I hit 130 and thought OMG, I am a whale. I had never weighed that much before except when I was pregnant so it seemed fat to me at the time.

    ^^^ This

    I am 5' and was 130lbs at my highest two months ago, that is what I weighed when I was pregnant! To me I was fat because that is not what I have looked like most of my life.

    Yes you are venting (totally understandable) but you have also now done exactly what you are venting about, you have now insulted those who are smaller and possibly made them uncomfortable.

    These types of threads tend get way out of hand, It's just not good stuff to post:smile:
  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
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    Maybe she's jealous of you.
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
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    It all relative, but its easier to lose 2 than 20.
  • clarkeje1
    clarkeje1 Posts: 1,634 Member
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    haha ouch lol
  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
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    Maybe she's jealous of you.
    Absolutely, there is jealous afoot here. Someone is....and it might be me.

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