MEN ONLY: Bro code poll

MassiveDelta
MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
edited November 7 in Chit-Chat
I would like an opinion about the following scenario.
My ex girl friend from high school ( a semi serious relationship) recently got divorced. I found out today my best friend also from high school has been dating her for a month. (my wife informed me of the latter)

Despite our relationship having ended 17-18 years ago does my best friend at least owe me a quick phone call asking me permission. Out of respect. Which I would have granted.

Additionaly does my wife have any reason to be upset about this?
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Replies

  • ket_the_jet
    ket_the_jet Posts: 1,257 Member
    I disagree that your buddy needed to call you and I also disagree that your wife has any right to be upset.
    -wtk
  • Nopedotjpeg
    Nopedotjpeg Posts: 1,805 Member
    I think bro code has a statute of limitation.
  • mtperry9
    mtperry9 Posts: 49 Member
    Nah bro, you got your own life now ... no need revisiting anything from the past. Neither of you are the same you were back then, not sure the code still applies.

    Also, I would think the mere fact it doesn't bother/affect you would point to your wife the dedication you have to her and where you 2 are heading.
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
    Ask you for permission? Hell to the no, game on for him and her.
  • taso42
    taso42 Posts: 8,980 Member
    Maybe if were 17-18 weeks. But years? After everyone has moved on. Nah...
  • sexygenius
    sexygenius Posts: 1,078 Member
    I think after like 10 years it shouldn't matter, especially if one is married... but hey what do I know, I'm just a girl..
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    No he doesn't need your opinion, and yes your wife should be pissed that you care about giving permission for someone to see another woman.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    LOL ... what a funny joke thread!
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
    Oh was this sarcasm? If so I totally missed it and well done!
  • Scott613
    Scott613 Posts: 2,317 Member
    It's been 18 years.....Hell NOOO why would you even care? You can't be a Bro anyway you're married!!! How can you take one for the team?? You can't, therefore your bro card is invalid. Part of being a Bro is being the faithful wingman even if it means being a kamakazi.
  • adjones5
    adjones5 Posts: 938 Member
    It's been 18 years.....Hell NOOO why would you even care?

    I know I lack a penis but I figured I could chime in anyways...I agree with Scott!
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    Ido speak to him regularly but havent spoken to her in ages. And I don't care just at least could have called and said dude I hooked up with your old girl. I mean I absolutely hope both of them hit it off.
  • AllanMisner
    AllanMisner Posts: 4,140 Member
    I'd apply the five year rule (similar to the five second rule for dropped food). One of you was dropped and after five years, you leave it be.

    Your wife is a woman, she owns the hoo hoo, so she gets to be mad when she wants to be mad. Get her some flowers or plan a date night and reinforce that you know who you are married to.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    First question about him calling...no

    Second question about wife...the issue alone,no...you feeling that you may have been owed a call,yes.

    Sorry,being honest.
  • adjones5
    adjones5 Posts: 938 Member
    I mean it is a little weird that that would not come up in conversation between you and your friend since you talk on a regular basis but this was so long ago maybe he honestly just doesn't remember. It is a little disconcerting that you care this much though.
  • chrisdavey
    chrisdavey Posts: 9,834 Member
    because you still speak to him regularly, I reckon he should have mentioned something.
  • messyinthekitchen
    messyinthekitchen Posts: 662 Member
    No he doesn't need your opinion, and yes your wife should be pissed that you care about giving permission for someone to see another woman.

    THIS

    I know you asked for guys to answer but seriously, he doesn't need to ask you, you're a married man now and your wife is upset because you care enough to think you should be asked.
  • wbgolden
    wbgolden Posts: 2,066 Member
    I think bro code has a statute of limitation.
  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
    That would be a no he owes you nothing, and yes she should be pissed about that.

    One does not get to control others' love lives, especially nearly two decades later.
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815
    No he doesn't need your opinion, and yes your wife should be pissed that you care about giving permission for someone to see another woman.

    THIS

    I know you asked for guys to answer but seriously, he doesn't need to ask you, you're a married man now and your wife is upset because you care enough to think you should be asked.

    Yeah THIS

    If your married it shouldnt matter how much time has passed. Clearly your clinging to something....
  • Newfiedan
    Newfiedan Posts: 1,517 Member
    Yeah dude unless you still got a flame burning for her your S.O.L, your bud does not owe ya squat seeing as how you are married and have a life of your own that ship has sailed so let it go and move on.
  • CastleMadeOfSand
    CastleMadeOfSand Posts: 432 Member
    I get why it may bother you a bit, however it isn't breaking any unwritten bro code. If any of that were more recent, or you were still hurting over her (which btw, thank the fates you aren't) than it's no big deal.
  • bjfmade
    bjfmade Posts: 543 Member
    No he doesn't need your opinion, and yes your wife should be pissed that you care about giving permission for someone to see another woman.

    ^This
  • Articeluvsmemphis
    Articeluvsmemphis Posts: 1,987 Member
    obviously not a man sorry, but to answer, NO he didn't, and YES she does
  • ZebraHead
    ZebraHead Posts: 15,207 Member
    NO and YES


    WTF dude?
  • arnoldnagy
    arnoldnagy Posts: 51 Member
    Your buddy probably doesn't think anything of it. How could he know you're still carrying around unresolved feelings?
    The fact that you're concerned about it implies that you still have some feelings. Your wife should be concerned.

    Arny
  • crixmix
    crixmix Posts: 30
    Ido speak to him regularly but havent spoken to her in ages. And I don't care just at least could have called and said dude I hooked up with your old girl. I mean I absolutely hope both of them hit it off.

    I don't know why he wouldn't have mentioned having a girl in his life, let alone your ex. I think, my female perspective, is that he should have mentioned it, not for permission, but just to clear the air. If its no big deal, why hasn't he told you? Unless of course, he never talks about his girlfriends.
    As for your wife's feelings, you can't blame her for being hurt any more than she can blame you for feeling a little stung that your buddy hAs hooked up with your ex. just my opinion.
  • arnoldnagy
    arnoldnagy Posts: 51 Member
    Ido speak to him regularly but havent spoken to her in ages. And I don't care just at least could have called and said dude I hooked up with your old girl. I mean I absolutely hope both of them hit it off.

    Sorry, didn't see this post before my last one. I change my tune.

    Arny
  • CaWaterBug8
    CaWaterBug8 Posts: 1,040 Member
    I think bro code has a statute of limitation.
    Haha THIS!
  • rsmithy89
    rsmithy89 Posts: 174 Member
    Yeah its been too long. He doesnt have to ask even though it wouldve been nice to keep you in the loop.
This discussion has been closed.

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