ever been told you werent good looking?

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  • futuresize8
    futuresize8 Posts: 476 Member
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    I've gotten all kinds of comments, by my parents, by boys and girls in grade school, and even by one stupid husband, who I divorced. (He called me fat. He seemed to overlook his own shortcomings, including the fact that he was a complete douche.)

    I know the truth - I'm not beautiful, but I present well. I know how to do my hair, how to dress, how to give myself meticulous manicures and pedicures and how to expertly apply full makeup.

    I never leave my home without all of that done.

    I am now married to a wonderful man who clearly loves me truly, even though my weight needs some work.

    And I now also don't give a care about what other people think.

    I am losing the weight because I want my outside to better match my inside.
  • LauraSmyth28
    LauraSmyth28 Posts: 399 Member
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    Oh and I also have an ex who told me that if my best friend lost a good 100lbs she'd be his ideal woman.

    First of all....never say this to a girl about her best friend!
    And second of all...my best friend is beautiful no matter what she weighs!!
  • Kityngirl
    Kityngirl Posts: 14,332 Member
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    I've been called ugly before, but mostly I just never really got complimented for my looks. I always got "you're so funny" or "you're so smart", so I tend to get more offended or hurt when people call me stupid than if people call me ugly. :laugh:

    Although I do get that warm and fuzzy feeling when my husband calls me beautiful, although I always tell him he's biased. :tongue:
  • LJV1031
    LJV1031 Posts: 502 Member
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    Wow. I am shocked by the responses here, especially after looking through many pictures. Those of you who have suffered low self esteem due to those comments, please rest assured, I see no ugly people in this thread. Working on our bodies is great, just don't forget to work on keeping your mind & self worth in a positive place. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • Captain_Mal
    Captain_Mal Posts: 946 Member
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    Oh yeah plenty of times. When I was younger, in my teens, it was devastating as no one wants to be hideous. I still get that sometimes but now I generally regard those folks as idiots.
  • SiltyPigeon
    SiltyPigeon Posts: 920 Member
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    My Dad tells me all the time that I need to lose 10 more #'s so I can become a stripper. But he's joking........ I think. :P
  • EmCarroll1990
    EmCarroll1990 Posts: 2,849 Member
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    Oh yeah plenty of times. When I was younger, in my teens, it was devastating as no one wants to be hideous. I still get that sometimes but now I generally regard those folks as idiots.

    Smart girl.
  • lakersfan4life
    lakersfan4life Posts: 322 Member
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    People who actually make these comments are truly just insecure in themselves.

    What kind of "friend" would tell you youre ugly? Some people just need a good crack in the jaw
  • dayylight
    dayylight Posts: 69
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    I always get either "you have such a pretty face" or "you'd be so pretty if you lost weight" both of which indicate that I'm not pretty now. Honestly it used to make me insecure but in the past couple years I've stopped caring. My boyfriend thinks I'm the most beautiful girl in the world and his opinion is the only one that matters. Besides my own lol.
  • chelleymarie88
    chelleymarie88 Posts: 775
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    Of course.. I've been told some really offensive things, especially about my appearance. I've been called an ugly amazon to a manface. People can be so rude. :\
  • Sweetncgal78
    Sweetncgal78 Posts: 99 Member
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    I've been told I wasn't good looking since we all had to watch that horrible video about the chances in our body. Purberty is a horrible thing. I'm still getting the "ugly girl" looks from people.

    I was hanging out with one of my chick friends and her sister and realized I'M THE UGLY FRIEND!

    There's no way you are the "ugly friend", you're beautiful.

    Yep, she's right, your gorgeous!
  • nikki1anna
    nikki1anna Posts: 98
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    I'm hott and I am a dark skinned lady. In middle school this guy I reallllly liked, told me if I was caramel skinned I'd be gorgeous. It hurt, for a long time, because I was like 12 and he was at the time my soulmate (haha) fast forward 8 years when he totally wanted to date me, and begged me for about five months, until it all fizzled...and when I says fizzled I mean I got tired of him calling, texting and buying me dinner... because obviously i was not serious about him anymore. To this day, he tells me if I ever get divorced, he's interested.

    Ahhhh I feel greeatttt!!
  • madameduffay
    madameduffay Posts: 166 Member
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    HorrorChix, is that your picture? Because, if so, you are definitly not ugly. You have a beautiful smile. Trust me, I don't lie.

    Now, stop thinking/feeling that way about yourself right this minute.

    And change your screen name!
  • kiyawow
    kiyawow Posts: 38 Member
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    Yes, and no matter who says it and why it scars you..I was a chubby teen....

    Everyone is different, just some are more confident in there own skin, I guess with the way people have treated me in the past I don't always feel I am..

    It can be so exhausting putting on a brave face, and pretending confidence as its just a go to as you have no idea how to deal with how you really feel about yourself.

    Even now I still struggle daily, but I was much happier when I was thinner, more confident.

    Even when some things are said in jest it can have an affect if you have been made to feel like you are not as pretty as somepeople might prefer you were.

    I am so grateful for the male best friend that I have , as when he sees I am struggling, he is the only one who has been able to spot it and really make me feel that he means it when he pays me a compliment because he knows me inside and out.....

    Its easier said than done to say that you need to work on your mind, its true we do need to... but lets face it its so nice and heart warming when someone you love or care for says something nice about you spontaneously. How many of us have that though?

    Will find away to be happy in my own skin one day!:-)
  • madameduffay
    madameduffay Posts: 166 Member
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    I have never been told to my face about whether or not I looked good, but I have been called fat-related names when I was younger. In grade 8, this kid used to bully me a bit and call me names. Hate that guy.

    I'm about half way to the total weight I want to lose and I'm feeling amazing. I don't think I've ever felt so confident. If someone were to make a comment to me now, it wouldn't bother me a bit (although I'd probably say something smart *kitten* back - just for good measure).
  • phy40
    phy40 Posts: 260 Member
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    I don't remember ever being told I was ugly by any of my friends but my sister called my ugly when we were growing up. Most of us are very attactrive people but we fell to realize it and that effects our relationships with others. When I look in the mirror, I like what I see!
  • Namaste1983
    Namaste1983 Posts: 603 Member
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    I'VE BEEN MY DAD "LITTLE HIPPO" AND "PORKY BUTT" MY ENTIRE LIFE. I'M USED TO IT NOW AND SINCE HE'S A BIG GUY I'VE COME TO TERMS WITH IT.

    AS FOR OTHERS.... I HAVE BEEN THE SECRET GIRLFRIEND WHO NO ONE COULD KNOW ABOUT BECAUSE I WAS FAT AND THEY WERE ATHLETES/JOCKES ETC. THIS HAS MORE TO DO WITH MY SELF WORTH AND ESTEEM. THEY WERE JERKS YES, BUT I ACCEPTED THE TERMS. I AM AT FAULT AS WELL.

    IF I HAD A DOLLAR FOR EVERYTIME SOMEONE TOLD ME "YOU HAVE SUCH A PRETTY FACE... BUT" IT FELT LIKE EVERY COMPLIMENT WAS FOLLOWED WITH A BUT, OR IF ONLY....

    THE PHRASE THAT PUSHED ME TO LOSE THE WIEGHT WAS BEING INTRODUCED AT A WEDDING AS " THE PRETTIEST FAT GIRL YOU'LL EVER MEET" YEP.

    IN ALL HONESTY IT WAS FUEL FOR THE FIRE THAT GOT ME HERE. PEOPLE ARE MEAN WHEREVER YOU GO. I CHOOSE TO FIND THE SILVER LINING, LIVE WITH KINDNESS AND STAND UP FOR MYSELF IN ALL SITUATIONS.
  • nolakris
    nolakris Posts: 98 Member
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    I always got "but you have such a pretty face.." which is another way of saying "shame about the body!" which I think is the worst 'compliment' anybody can possibly give!!

    I get this too! It's the most back handed compliment ever!

    My great-grandmother never weighed less than 300lbs as an adult (I know she was even bigger when she was younger) and growing up she used to go on and on about how pretty my skinny cousin was when we were kids. Then she'd go on and on about how fat I was- I wasn't fat as a kid, just a lot taller than my cousin. I didn't develop a weight problem until my teens. I'm well aware that a lot of my weight issues come from the criticism on the skinny side of my family.
  • shiseido_faerie
    shiseido_faerie Posts: 771 Member
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    I haven't ever been called ugly that I know of, it's more that no one really said anything at all, I wasn't pretty or hot or cute or sexy, I wasn't ugly, I was just the really nice girl that got along with everyone...and so no one really seemed to notice my looks one way or another.
  • writinmama
    writinmama Posts: 15
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    Yes...all the time. My cousin used to tell me I looked like my dad and then wrinkle her nose like she was disgusted. I always felt so self-conscious. No teenage girl wants to be told she looks like a man. Once right after I'd had my first child, I was bending over to clean my car and some guy who was parked across the street yelled, "Da#@m, that's a wide load!" I've never forgotten the pain and humiliation. I turned around and stared at him, and it was just like another commenter said above...he looked so shame-faced and confused when I faced him, he drove off. Then I went inside and bawled. It's terrible the way these cutting comments stick to you and continue to cause pain long after they've been said. And I'm not the sort of person who lets it motivate me to do better like I should. It drags me down and I wallow in self-pity with a giant bowl of ice cream. I'm working on getting better and not letting others drag me down. I'm learning to be happy with who I am, but it's a slow process with a lot of ups and downs.

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