Does anyone else struggle to feel sexy?

AOK1774 · January 2012

I used to struggle with it but not anymore! About 2 years ago I found out my husband had several affairs, devastating to me of course and blame alot on myself at that time, "not sexy enough, not confident enough, etc" until I got a phone call from a good friend (male) he told me to repeat after him and said:
1. I am a sexy woman
2. I am a confident woman
3. I am a smart woman

He told me that those are the 3 qualities men most adore in a woman and that I had all 3. Just those words made a difference in me and changed my perspective.

Sexy is a state of mind, and if you display your confidence, that is very sexy! I am not a size 2 or 4, I am a size 14/16 and everywhere I go I get looks from other men even when I am with my husband. My husband never realized what he had, but realizes it now!

alapoint89 · January 2012

i never feel sexy enough!!!

ashlielinn · January 2012

Every single day. However, I've never really been able to feel that way. I don't think there's a sexy bone in my body! God forgot to put that in my hardwiring

haha

newmrswood · January 2012

I've discovered that in order to feel sexy you have to do sexy things! Make yourself BE sexy! Put on a pair of heels in your lingerie, dress up for aYOURSELF and do something with the girls. You have to feel sexy to you and build your self-confidence up.

fteale · January 2012

I am really happy about this thread. I have always felt like the odd one out having no concept of feeling sexy whatsoever. I just don't get it at all. Men sometimes talk about me flirting, or tell me I should flirt more to get my way, and I just go "huh?" I wouldn't know how to pretend to be sexy if my life depended on it.

Matching underwear makes me feel awkward and try hard. I don't like heels, I only wear boots, I don't even use hair conditioner, let alone straighten it, or wear make up, or tweeze. I have no fingernails to speak of so varnish is out if I don't want my fingers to look like smarties.

So I am glad I am not the only one!

jmorrisof2 · January 2012

My Partner is going through this at the moment & although you might not want "guy input" here it comes. I Love her, do I wish she was healthier, YES, do I still wish to touch & make love to her OH BOY YES. I luv making out, touching & well you get the idea, I have a pretty high sex drive & she used to match if not exceed this. But a number of things have contributed to her lack of drive BUT it is the extra pounds that really concern her.

MY POINT - ladies your man loves you(unless he is a user, negative pig/you'll know the difference) & he STILL fancies you, yes a little bit because he is wired to get erect at a tree falling down BUT SERIOUSLY, he took care of himself before & during(when you're at work/asleep/cooking, etc) So if that is what he wanted he would leave you alone.

BUT HE WANTS YOU

Russ

Thank you for posting this for all the women out there. It is great to know there are good men out there that love us no matter what.

n8nshelly · January 2012

I'm the same, I used to be real thin and did'nt have to work for it but as I got older I started to gain weight and I have a hrad time feeling good with the extra weight. So here I am, and doing very well with this. I do exercise 6 days a week most weeks anyway, and use a fat detox which I love so things are happening for me..

HorrorChix89 · January 2012

I never "feel" sexy or even call myself that. Guys I date say I'm sexy right before they start ripping my clothes off. I think there's a connection there...I'm only sexy when they get to enjoy it. FML

turningstar · January 2012

As a woman, I am my own worst enemy. I have never, ever felt sexy. Pretty maybe, if im dressed up and going to dinner or something. My husband always tells me im beautiful, but I never see it for myself, even though I get looks from men when we go out, and I even catch guys at the gym watching me. Im working on seeing myself in a different light, no matter what my size or weight. We all should.

VoodooLuLu · January 2012

ive been struggling with the way i look ever since i had my kids!!! before i was 116 and now im 184.2 my goal is 116 again,now im not being negative im working my way to my goal but i think i wont feel good in my skin or feel sexy or anything till im back to my old weight...