attraction

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  • mnishi
    mnishi Posts: 422 Member
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    There's a difference between confident and cocky. Confidence is sexy and has nothing to do with being a 'bad boy'. Cockiness is UGLY.

    ^this
  • jenlb99
    jenlb99 Posts: 213 Member
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    I used to date good guys, but as I have been changing, so has my taste. Really, when the good guys find out what I do and how well I do it (kickboxing), they run anyway lol. That works for me -- I don't want a man I can beat up!! lol

    I'm short but strong, and I still want what all women want -- a man who makes them feel safe and secure. For me, that seems to be a certain type -- a man's man. A mix of good and bad who is in shape (or on their way there).

    I have my eye on one, and oohhhh that man scares the crap out of me...but in a good way! I'd never feel like his mother (like I did with the "good" boys), and he'd be able to dominate me physically (even though he wouldn't)...which is a real turn on! lol
  • Yatashie
    Yatashie Posts: 61 Member
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    YES! This is exactly the problem. I am a very strong willed, argumentative, stubborn pain in the *kitten* so I need to find a nice guy that won't let me walk all over him. I also have an addiction to musicians which means they are overemotional, generally immature, and flaky as all hell which is not fun either.

    Mr. Perfect = Smart, confident, self-aware, funny, into music, art and theatre, open minded, committed but not clingy, with a killer smile.

    This is why I am perpetually single....

    Grey area.

    There's nearly always a grey area.

    As long as a man doesn't remind me of a doormat, child, or puppy, I have no problem with him being nice.
  • aheartbeatsos
    aheartbeatsos Posts: 87
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    My life is slowly playing out like an episode of the Bachelorette.
    I was seeing a very nice boy, but then a bad boy who's been in and out of my life just showed up again after a few months of no communication and stole my heart.
    I asked him out and he said yes, but we haven't spoken since then (March 16).
    I should have given the final rose to the other boy!
  • felice03
    felice03 Posts: 2,732 Member
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    ok, backstory time...gone out with a guy a couple times...super nice, I don't think he could argue with someone to save his life, agrees with everything I say...drives me INSANE!!!! I would be so bored staying with him...does the "bad boy element" add a spark to the realtionship, i think it does.


    Is this the farmer?


    yes, the farmer...
  • mznisaelaine
    mznisaelaine Posts: 2,262 Member
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    I'm a nice girl who likes nice guys. Nice guys are always more attractive. Period.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    I see it a lot and don't understand it. Just because you want a little excitement, doesn't mean you have to deal with a person that treats you badly.

    I like listening to the gal that wants a "dangerous" guy, then b*tches about being treated like crap or stood up or posting bail for their tough guy wannabe.

    I'd prefer to be responsible and have a woman that wants a responsible man. and...I am...and she does.
  • Etrouton
    Etrouton Posts: 7 Member
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    For the record, my definition of a "nice guy" isn't one who is meek and timid and boring and lets women get away with treating him like garbage. To me, a "nice guy" (I actually prefer the term "good man") is one who is honest, has a solid work ethic, respects himself, and treats others the way he expects to be treated.

    Absolutley! I love good guys! Never liked a bad guy, if people aren't nice to others I find that really unattractive. My guy is a good guy but definitely NOT a push over, he rules the roost and lets me feel protected and 'girly' without ever being nasty or getting angry at me. I really got lucky!
  • misrical
    misrical Posts: 66 Member
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    Well, a nice guy should always finish last....take that however your mind lets you.

    but honestly the "bad boys" are usually more confident, of course that is because a lot of them are jerks, and are just gonna brush it off and move on to the next lady.
    And the nice guys a lot of the time, are intimidated by women, that was always my problem when i was younger and a lot of the nice guys never get over the fear of rejection.
  • rookmb
    rookmb Posts: 84
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    I always went for the 'bad boys'. After a LOT of heartache, I finally dug to the root of the problem and found out that it was for two reasons. First, I thought I could "fix" them - yea, that doesn't work - and second, because I didn't think I deserved someone to treat me the way I wanted to be treated.

    With age comes wisdom. Bad boys are nothing but drama and heartache. Eleven years ago I found the NICEST man. He respects me, he makes me laugh, he loves me and I have never been happier in my life. :)
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    My hubby's an inbetweener.

    I must admit, though, it was his sweetness that made me fall for him. He used to cry when I sang to him, and he told me he loved me on the first night. Usually, that'd make me feel uncomfortable, and it did at first, but it made me fall for him.

    That, and the sex.

    (and him, ofc :D)
  • lorenzoinlr
    lorenzoinlr Posts: 338 Member
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    It's been said we respect others for their strengths but love them for their weaknesses. If that's true it's easy to see why we might be attracted to the ones with an edge. It can be similar for us men with women we're attracted to. I respect nuns but couldn't love one.

    There are however individuals who have that edge, are confident not cocky and still solid people. My gf fits that description and I think I do to.
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    I got me the boy that looked like a 'bad' boy but was really a nice guy! :bigsmile:
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    I got me the boy that looked like a 'bad' boy but was really a nice guy! :bigsmile:

    those are the best!!!!!!! :love:
  • xo_morgan
    xo_morgan Posts: 298
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    I like a nice guy. But someone who also knows what he wants & has a little fire to him. I occasionally need someone to put me in my place because i can be bit of a b!tch sometimes. So i dont want a guy to tell me that he agrees with everything i do. I want someone who will tell me when im being an @$$hole. because i would do the same for him.

    So i guess someone inbetween.
  • kealambert
    kealambert Posts: 961 Member
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    I tend to like my women a bit edgy. decisive, passionate, driven and honest. I can't stand the nicey-nice broads who go behind their friend's back and talk bad about them, but in front of them act like they're such best friends blah blah

    I could continue on for hours, I'm sure
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,864 Member
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    I know opposites supposedly attract, but I have always been attracted to women as bat-poop crazy as me. Oh sure there were some sane ones in there along the way, but the ones I really clicked with? Certifiable.
  • kealambert
    kealambert Posts: 961 Member
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    I know opposites supposedly attract, but I have always been attracted to women as bat-poop crazy as me. Oh sure there were some sane ones in there along the way, but the ones I really clicked with? Certifiable.

    quote for truth!
  • Kenzietea2
    Kenzietea2 Posts: 1,132 Member
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    Why women don't like 'nice' guys
    http://www.heartless-*****es.com/rants/niceguys/niceguys.shtml

    That being said, it doesn't mean we don't like men with compassion and good hearts. But we need men to have some balls.

    edit:
    I think you can figure out the starred word, but just in case its b i t c h
  • MisterDubs303
    MisterDubs303 Posts: 1,216 Member
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    Why women don't like 'nice' guys
    http://www.heartless-*****es.com/rants/niceguys/niceguys.shtml
    Ouch. Probably the best article I've read in months.

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