When people unfriend you, for being human!!

I tend to unfriend those that go over a month. I'll send them a message telling them that when they're ready to get back at it to let me know...but I don't care to have inactives on my list either. If you're not around for a month, you're not dedicated.

It is their loss if they delete you. Just keep kicking *kitten* and really, those that stuck around will be there to support you and to receive your amazing support. Screw Everyone else... They don't care, why should you.

If a friend did not log for awhile, then why wouldn't you message them and see what's up???? That's what a friend should do.

:flowerforyou:

I wouldn't take it personally. I had less than 10 friends and one day I just deleted them all recently. It had nothing to do with the friends it was about me not wanting all the clutter and tons of comments to read through. I figure if I can't do this thing on my own, then I can't do it. Also to be honest... when I read whining I usually delete or hide that person.

It is their loss if they delete you. Just keep kicking *kitten* and really, those that stuck around will be there to support you and to receive your amazing support. Screw Everyone else... They don't care, why should you.

this is the same kind of advice as you get when someone doesn't like you because of your personality and all your enabler friends tell you its just cause they are 'jealous'.

Do you think it is better to say the "deleter" is better than the "deleted"? No way.

Someone may have already said this but if you are going on vacation, have an injury, etc--I would suggest posting a message about your impending hiatus.

My mama always said, "Mary, you're not going to like everybody you meet. And they're not all going to like you. It's life."

Your mama is a wise woman!! :flowerforyou:

I have logged for the last 500 days everyday. I want friends that are not trying but doing this. When I see someone not logging for 3 days, I delete them. If it makes me a snob ...then so be it. I have amazing friends.

Yeah, I have to agree. I understand that everyone does things their own way and that's fine... but I've logged in for around 280 days in a row and I don't feel inclined to keep people on my friend list who log in every now and then and who never contribute to any of my posts or successes. I only have one friend on here that has fallen off the wagon a couple of times but I keep her as a friend because she was very supportive when I first began and I hope to support her again too when she gets back into it.

I never delete anyone. How can someone who isn't being active "clog" up your friend's list? It's not like they are posting anything. *shrugs*

^This. If a friend disappears for a couple of days, weeks, months, whatever, it's not like they're clogging up your feed, or taking up too much of your time.

I have kept friends that have fallen off the wagon; but when they were here, they were very supportive. Life happens, so when they come back, I'm still here to give them the same support they gave me. I have also deleted people who have logged in every day because they were not supportive. If I'm putting myself out there supporting you everyday, I'd hope my "friends" would care to do the same.

Yes, I'm here for ME, but we all need some kind of support - it's why we have friends. I look at it as a give and take relationship. Some people just like to take (and seldom ever give) and those are the people who can take from someone/somewhere else.

I'm trying to figure out how half of you have the time to troll your friends list to see who is logging in and who isn't... I can barely keep up with the few I have, so those of you who have 100's.. do you REALLY actually Good Job, WTG, Happy 30th,50th,90th check in to EVERY ONE of those HUNDREDS of friends you have? .. answer everyone's questions, participate on everyones thread, everyday??!!?? Do you have jobs? Do you have lives? Are you real people?

um, you can change your friends list to sort everyone by how long its been since they logged in- and by longest first- and you can just X out all the people that dont log in anymore. I have almost 3 hundred friends and every day I pick a letter of the alphabet and run around checking on all the A's & Q's or the G's, etc. I check their recent activity for the week, offer up some encouragement and give them praise or a private message or just tell them someone's got their back.

Being an MFP friend does not require anyone to comment on everything that another person posts... that's called creepy.

Also- why are you so concerned about how other people use a site on the internet - that you accuse them of having poor time management or being fake just because you dont choose to use the wesite the same way they do.

Thats more than a bit judgmental and, to be honest, douchey. Isnt there a better way to spend your time as well?

^^^Ummm you.. have ISSUES... Those unfortunately.. CANNOT be dieted away... lil defensive aren't we?? Ive seen WAAAYYYY more offending jokes and things said than what I did.. and ummm yeah.. I don't have time to run around looking for sorting buttons or classifying people by the MFP's A,B,C's... I'm ever so sorry.... not...

sn:// some people on here are waaaayyyyyy creeepyyy... *checks to see if they have a *block or hide button* while I have a few moments...

good luck with life and stuff.

I'm glad you edited that...I've seen many of your posts...and that one was beneath you.

I never delete anyone. How can someone who isn't being active "clog" up your friend's list? It's not like they are posting anything. *shrugs*

^This. If a friend disappears for a couple of days, weeks, months, whatever, it's not like they're clogging up your feed, or taking up too much of your time.

Well there is a limit on MFP, though I think they raised it. My thing is that I just want my friends to share in my committment. As I said, I accept everybody that sends me an FR. Some want to interact, some just want to watch my diary or my program. If we never interacted and you just watched my diary, and now you are gone for a month, why should I wait for you to return? I'm moving forward with my health and fitness using this site. If you are gone 30 days, you are obviously making different choices. Therefore, we no longer have the commonality that made us friends in the first place. Going to your list and seeing where friend after friend has abandoned their program can be a little demotivating.

If You Are Absent During My Struggle, Don’t Expect To Be Present During My Success"

I love this quote that I saw recently. And I'm here for support, whether I'm having an awesome week, or a crappy week. I have found that for the most part, the ones who are here to get muscles for competition or whatnot, are here for only that. And the ones that are here to lose the weight because they are morbidly obese (myself included) are here for it no matter what...okay...that totally didn't come out the way I meant...

You see, I have been overweight since the pregnancy of my first child. Before that I was pretty skinny...not physically in shape, I couldn't run to save my life...but I was skinny. Now that I have struggled with weight issues for 14 years, I know that there WILL be down times when my depression gets the best of me and I'm sorry if that doesn't fit other people's "requirments" to be on their friends list. If I'm MIA because my depression got to me and all of a sudden someone is gone from my friends list...good riddance. Because for me, I need the most support when I'm down...not when I'm doing well and posting and logging daily.

So really, you shouldn't even concern yourself with the likes of those kinds of people because really, they didn't deserve to be in your support system to begin with.

Normally if someone is 'off' for a month or more, they are not participating. I limit the size of my list to folks who participate (except for vacation time or other reason they mention ahead of time). I don't worry if they don't interact with me personally daily, but I can't help them if they never log in. I usually try and send a message a little while before I 'pull the plug'. If they come back on line, they can always re-friend me.