Telling people or not.
Flab2fitfi
Posts: 1,349 Member
I have made the decision not to tell anyone except from my sister and my husband ( who is also trying to lose weight) that I am trying to lose weight.
Maybe I'm just worried about failing or I'm just waiting to see if people notice. Also I have had friends in the past who have tried to sabotage my weight loss.
I think as I am also doing this for me ( not to look fab - though a bonus) for health reasons and I think sometimes others don't understand that.
I'm just wondering if others out here are keeping it a secret
Maybe I'm just worried about failing or I'm just waiting to see if people notice. Also I have had friends in the past who have tried to sabotage my weight loss.
I think as I am also doing this for me ( not to look fab - though a bonus) for health reasons and I think sometimes others don't understand that.
I'm just wondering if others out here are keeping it a secret
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Replies
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I am right with you. I am not telling nobody. I want to see if anyone will notice or not. I just started all over again on May first.0
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Same for me !
I told my boyfriend, because he would have noticed anyway. But I kept it from my sister and my mother because I don't want to fail and disappoint them. I wanna do this by myself, for myself.0 -
Everyone and their mom knows what I'm up to. But, I do so hoping some people I know that really need to get motivated for the sake of their very life, might do so.0
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I agree. Just do it for you. Your husband and sister will certainly provide support, but announcing it can lead to disapointment. All the best!0
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My boyfriend knows (and is my support system) and just the other day, I sent my parents some progress pics (they live 2000 miles away and I knew they'd be thrilled with my success). I don't really have any social life otherwise, so there's no one else to tell, but I haven't even mentioned it to extended family on Facebook or anything. I figure I'll let people know when I hit my goal, though I might see family in June, so there will be no hiding it then!0
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My oppinion is that people should be told especially those who are aound you all the time. They can help with the weight loss. What is gonna happen when everyone wants to go out for Pizza and Ice Cream? They'll think twice about these things and not eat items that cojuld cause you to slip. Just Say'n...0
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I would tell no one. After all, you are doing this for yourself and your health!
In the past when I announced I was "losing weight" it seemed as if that's all my friends wanted to talk about.
It was always, "how much have you lost, what size are you now?" kind of stuff.
No, keep it to yourself and let your RESULTS speak for themselves.
Stay focused on your goal and do not let anyone/anything get in your way of SELF-Fulfillment!0 -
I have made the decision not to tell anyone except from my sister and my husband ( who is also trying to lose weight) that I am trying to lose weight.
Maybe I'm just worried about failing or I'm just waiting to see if people notice. Also I have had friends in the past who have tried to sabotage my weight loss.
I think as I am also doing this for me ( not to look fab - though a bonus) for health reasons and I think sometimes others don't understand that.
I'm just wondering if others out here are keeping it a secret
My husband knows how important it is that I get my health up to snuff and he has been an AWESOME guy about it.
Anyone else in my family - its none of their damn business. They are the most spiteful, overweight, alcoholic, smoking, eat the worst kinds of foods, never exercising type of family and they do EVERYTHING to sabotage the minute they hear someone is trying to lose weight.
My mother one time snuck in breadcrumbs in one of her dishes (after hearing I had to get rid of eating bread altogether) to see if I was lying to her. Well, within five minutes, my mouth started breaking out with bleeding kankar sores...
Needless to say, I got up from the table and left. Ive been almost a year, gone without bread, pasta, rice, corn, flour to the point that I react, some mild while others are severe. And, the flare up takes a while to clear...
So, my family can kiss my *kitten*... everytime they see me and make a half-attempt at a compliment, I dont say one freakin' word.0 -
My oppinion is that people should be told especially those who are aound you all the time. They can help with the weight loss. What is gonna happen when everyone wants to go out for Pizza and Ice Cream? They'll think twice about these things and not eat items that cojuld cause you to slip. Just Say'n...
Yeah, but then again depending on the types of people you have around you, they might interpret you telling them about your weight-loss goal as a license to become the f***ing Food Police, constantly on your case about whether you should be eating that. I totally understand where OP and others who aren't renting billboard space to tell people about their weight-loss journey are coming from. Those people mean well but their comments really don't help and it's hard to get them to stop without any hurt feelings on either side.0 -
I don't really talk about it either; for me it feels like an area that I feel insecure and vulnerable so I don't really go there. I do talk with some good friends about goals to be more healthy.0
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My mom, sister and SO besides that i dont tell even though most have figured it out when i dont eat certain things when im out with them or when they call im like always on my way trying to get ready or just finished doing some sort of workout. The funniest has got to be when people come over they dont understand how everything i have has to be cooked! kinda cracks me up everything is whole grain lots of chicken and vegetables and they dont understand how me, SO and kids arent starving. It was a family decision when we go out of our way to "cheat" our tummy feels the consequences. Now i have a group of like 10 people where someone is always ready to workout because they had no idea what we (SO is also trying to get fit) were doing but they noticed the change and see how dedicated I am and how full of energy i am all the time.0
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I never told anyone either.. and I still don't tell people even though I've lost 50 lbs. When they ask, I get really embarrassed so I guess that's why I keep it quiet. But it's really personal and no one else's business.0
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I tell people I am going to the gym. I casually mentioned to my sister, parents, and a couple of friends that I am looking to lose a bit.
My sister....hasn't been very supportive in the past... she thinks that it wil just come back. I am trying to encourage her to join me, since she isn't feeling happy in her body at the moment, but it isn't really working.
So I guess, she'll just have to see when I get there. Then ask me what I did!
WEight isn't a popular topic in my social circle, but health is...we are all doing things to be healthier in one way or another.0 -
Told a few co workers, just because we eat out all the time so if I order healthy I saw oh yeah I am trying to be careful with summer coming up. Husband does not know he is working out of town. You always get FAT together and DIET alone. WHY? It's so dang hard.0
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I am doing it for myself this time around, just my immediate fam know what I am doing. Its hard to not notice me walking around scanning everything with my phone. I'm just going to bust my *kitten*, eat the stuff I am supposed to, and shed the pounds.0
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I'm keeping it quiet as well. It's not a big secret and I'm not ashamed, I'm just not broadcasting it. Sometimes I find people who are constantly talking about their diets and what they can't have a bit...overwhelming. I applaud their efforts, but it's their journey and I don't need to hear about every.single.thing.they.ate.or.didn't.eat.or.couldn't.eat.
So while my husband/kids are super supportive, I'm leaving it at that. And since I'm never over- hungry and never feeling deprived, it hasn't been such a big deal, LOL!.
Of course, I can barely move my arms today after Day One of 30 Day Shred...but no one has asked me why I'm walking like a Zombie.0 -
When I started (almost a year ago) I didn't really "keep it a secret;" I just never bothered to mention it to others. When the weight really started to fall off and people asked if I was losing weight (and how so), I told them "yes," and pointed them toward MFP. I guess I just figured that it really wasn't anybody's business,and, really, it's not like I told everyone a few decades ago, "I'm going to make a series of bad choices concerning how much I eat and how little I exercise that's ultimate going to put me in the 'obese' category..."0
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I feel ya'. I've found it's best to only bring it up to a few close people who genuinely want to know and are supportive. Others tend to be unknowing (and knowing!) jerks about it in some form or another.0
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I am keeping it a secret for now. I don't think I could handle the pressure of people constantly asking me how my diet is coming along; especially until eating smart and exercising is more of a habit. Good luck!0
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Can you tell me how to use my iphone to scan barcodes? I read about people doing it but don't know what app to get. Thanks!0
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I've only told two people. My good friend and my SO. They are supportive and don't care if I flub up or eat crap. I don't have anyone policing what I eat, "oh you're off your diet," "should you eat that.." ect. I just figure it's a change in eating habits while saving money with buying more healthy food at the store and less fast food. Eating out is not bad because I just eat simple chicken and greens or a salad. Like others said, I'm doing this for me and my health, losing the weight is an added benefit.
Also, it seems that everyone has their own weightloss advice and their way is the best. My way is working just fine and I really don't need the two cents advice from every person that I come across. I have a lot to lose so the slow and steady road is the way for me and quick fixes are not going to fix a long term problem.
I just find that I feel a lot less pressure when I just do my thing and make simple, healthier choices.0 -
I told everyone :P I even convince some family members to diet too! We made a biggest loser type contest for 3 months, we're doing it again but for 4 months now.
I also told other family members and they're very supportive, some friends too and I had to tell at work because they were constantly offering me food and didn't want to seem rude.0 -
Can you tell me how to use my iphone to scan barcodes? I read about people doing it but don't know what app to get. Thanks!0
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I've told my husband because, well, I don't really hide anything from him and it would look weird if I stashed the phone every time he walked by when I was entering my data. He's also very supportive and is sufficiently impressed when I finish a work out all sweaty that it gives me a boost of motivation. (Then he tells me to go take a shower before I can have a hug. :laugh:) Edit: Actually, last night I started 100 Squats in 100 Days and was too embarrassed to do them in front of him even though I told him about them. Even though we've been married for several years, the body insecurities still crop up now and then. He was very supportive and eventually I moved out from hiding behind the door (no, really! :laugh: ) and did them while we were watching a movie. He didn't care.
As for anyone else... not really. In general my mother knows because we discuss Wii workouts and food every now and then. I don't share any specifics, though, because if it gets back to my father then, despite being 31 years old, I invariably find myself in an emotionally numbing conversation about weight and health the next time I see him.
I don't want to share my goals and hopes with anyone at work because I don't want to feel as if they're judging me. Most likely they wouldn't even think about it and the paranoia is just that, but it makes me feel safer knowing that they have no expectations and I don't have to spend each month dreading some question about "how's the weight loss going?" I don't want to draw attention to myself because I just might get it. :ohwell:
On MFP, though... here I feel safer because I can share goals and progress and failures without having anyone staring at me while I wonder what that expression on their face actually means.0 -
Can you tell me how to use my iphone to scan barcodes? I read about people doing it but don't know what app to get. Thanks!
Oh my god, that is soo cool! I never noticed that button. And it worked!0 -
I never said anything about me trying to lose weight because I know people would ask questions or have a smart remark if I wasnt losing weight. But my mom noticed I had been losing right away (she is not one to give compliments lol). But my mom, sisters & of course my husband knows as well. I have kept it from the rest of my family. I have cousins who get togther to go walking or work out, they will invite me or I will ask to come, but when the time comes I don't hear from them & they post on facebook that they went walking or working out ! But they will invite me to eat out or go shopping =/. So I just figured since I'm losing weight for myself anyway I'll just keep it to myself and do it all myself. I know when they actually see me, since I have kept my distance they will ask what I'm doing & want to know all the details. Yea I got some weird & shady family members, I tend to think I was adopted lol.0
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My oppinion is that people should be told especially those who are aound you all the time. They can help with the weight loss. What is gonna happen when everyone wants to go out for Pizza and Ice Cream? They'll think twice about these things and not eat items that cojuld cause you to slip. Just Say'n...
I can understand where you are coming from but I'm on of those people who very rarely eats out or has take -aways as I have quite severe food intolerances and my friends are used to me ordering them something - especially if they bring the kids over and I'll get something out of the fridge. Plus If I do go out they know that I dont eat most things on the menu ( we will often walk the kids down to McDonald and all I will have is a black coffee) so me having a salad is no different.0 -
I've spent 20+ years of yo-yo and not telling anyone. FORGET IT! Now, I am telling everyone!!! I even have a blog and twitter account because this.is.it Public records and I feel much more free because of it. And like a pp said, I scan everything so I look a little crazy!0
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I made it known when I started losing weight back in November 2010. I stopped partaking in pizza day at work, and would pass on the chocolates if I didn't have calories spare, so it was clear what I was doing.
Once people found out what I was doing, there were months of them trying to tell me why their latest fad diet was incredible. These were the same people who I'd seen starve themselves, stick to strict diets, get ill and stressed and 'fall of the wagon', then try something new or the same thing over and over again. I ignored them, and I plugged away.
However, I've lost at such a slow rate that almost anyone who knew what I was doing and noticed my initial loss has now become so used to seeing me very, very gradually lose weight that nobody is really aware of it. I actually had someone from our other office stop me in the corridor the other day and ask "Wow, are you losing weight?", I said yes, and she said "Of course you are! You can really tell! Well done!". This is someone who's seen me regularly during my weight loss since November 2010, at one point knew I was losing weight and has since forgotten.
I've also had to take off my engagement ring. It's been working its way along my hand for a few months, and now only fits on my thumb, which isn't comfortable. I've taken it off, and I'm wearing it on a chain on my neck until I get it re-sized. Someone noticed that the other day and said "Oh, are you losing weight?". I laughed and said I was, and responded "All in the hands at the moment, apparently!". She replied with "Yep. Well, I didn't want to say. I didn't know how to say that without sounding rude". Losing at the pace I am, it seems nobody really realises what size I was and how things are changing, and then occasionally something will happen or they'll realise the change and make a comment. After that, it stops again.0 -
I did it for a few months before telling anyone and then my husband blurted it out to his entire family. I recently added friends here on MFP (add me if you like) because I felt like I needed support from other people trying to do the same thing I am. To me, it's about losing weight, but really about taking back control of my life. We can do this. Find the support system that works best for you -- mine is people trying to do the same thing.0
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