Would you move for love?

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Replies

  • Shannonpurple
    Shannonpurple Posts: 268 Member
    DO IT !! before you get a really great job that you can't leave. You are young and nothing is holding you back DO IT DO IT DOIT!!!!!!:heart:
  • lmelangley
    lmelangley Posts: 1,039 Member
    I agree with the folks who say move close to him but don't move in with him right away. You need to get to know each other a bit better before moving in together, and moving is stressful until you find a job and get settled. You're going to need some down time. That being said, if you really, really like the dude, you'll never know if it would have worked if you don't try.

    Get those resumes and cover letters out NOW. And, don't discount working for a temp agency at first. You just need to keep yourself financially solvent.
  • AndiJoy812
    AndiJoy812 Posts: 236
    You are young, you are single, and you have a world of opportunities at your door. Take a chance and move. Take the relationship slow. Get your own place, continue to be independent and embrace every opportunity. I think you are already leaning towards going...so go. You do not want to look back at this moment 20 years from now and regret it and wonder, "What if??" And remember, at this point in your life there is no such thing as failure. They are life lessons that make you stronger and wiser, so that you are better prepared for what is ahead. Good luck!!
  • deadstarsunburn
    deadstarsunburn Posts: 1,337 Member
    Research cost of living, job market etc. Do not live with him. Date like normal people. All should be fine.


    ^^^^This.


    Very smart advice.. Especially the not living together quite yet, all sorts of messes can come from that.
    I would absolutely go there if all the pieces came together!
  • atjays
    atjays Posts: 797 Member
    You're young, go on an adventure! I'm contemplating something similar this fall, with Florida as the destination. Really adds something to look forward to and huge motivation for everything I'm currently doing
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
    North Carolina!? really!? HELL TO THE NO! I wouldn't live in NC if all the other states fell off the planet - don't you read the news!?
    Take your female, degree self to THE MOST BACKWARD and repressive state. better yet, WHY not just go back in time say ... 200 years.

    IF this boy cares about you, HE will move and NEITHER of you will ever step foot in North Carolina or any state south of KY (which is shady)

    NO NO 1,000 times NO!

    Wow. Have you lived here? I have been here for almost 30 years and I love this state. The politics can suck sometimes, but they suck in other states, too. Please stop insulting the state that I love. TY
  • xHelloQuincyx
    xHelloQuincyx Posts: 884 Member
    yeah i would totally do it. but thats just me, you need to be sure about you.
  • TrailRunner61
    TrailRunner61 Posts: 2,505 Member
    Part of me wants to say life is too short... do it! The other part says.. you've seen him for 7 days since you were younger and you love him? I'd wait a while!
  • MissLuana
    MissLuana Posts: 356
    I say go for it!

    "Follow your heart but take your brain with you."- one of my favorite quotes

    Love it!!!

    Best of luck to you. If it works out...great. If not, sounds like you're independant enough to still make it...in a new city.
  • fajitatx
    fajitatx Posts: 36
    You can alway move home or crash with friends if it doesn't work out, go for it.
  • korsicash
    korsicash Posts: 770 Member
    DO IT!!!! So much more happening in the south than in the north AND no matter what happens cost of living is cheaper. BUT you are young so if he makes you happy go for it!!!!!
  • Jstewartdesigns
    Jstewartdesigns Posts: 51 Member
    Well, it sounds like you've already made your mind up and just need validation. No one can tell you what's right for you. No matter what you choose, if you've found that you made a mistake, correct it. There will ALWAYS be arguments for both sides. Follow your gut and you will find out if it was the right thing or not.
  • GasMasterFlash
    GasMasterFlash Posts: 2,206 Member
    I will be in about a month. Going from a town in the shadow of a beautiful, green mountain range to a border desert town with a whole lot of dirt.

    Why? We're moving closer to the in-laws. That is how much I love my wife.
  • SkinnyTopher
    SkinnyTopher Posts: 35
    When I was 20, the man I loved (and was engaged to) moved from North Carolina to be with me, here in Los Angeles. He was 19. And he turned out to be a cheating, sex-driven idiot. But I think one of the real problems was simply moving too quickly, as we moved in together right away.

    Anyway, all in all I should probably say that love knows no bounds, and distance shouldn't mean anything... but just move slowly. Follow that advice about not moving in together and dating normally. And just be prepared for the possibility of it not working out -- find other things there that satisfy you. Take up some hobbies and meet new people. Might want to try Meetup.com.

    And yes, the politics there are atrocious. Amendment One? Ugh.
  • PinkiePie07
    PinkiePie07 Posts: 103 Member
    I vote go, with exceptions. Make sure that's where you want to be, not just for love but that you would be happy there with our without the guy. Don't live with him, but if you absolutely have to, make sure you can afford the place by yourself. Also, make sure you can find a job. I wish you luck and I hope it works, but don't put yourself in a situation where if it doesn't you're up a river. Best of luck!
  • pa_jorg
    pa_jorg Posts: 4,404 Member
    Lifeis short, so why not?

    Just be practical and don't live together too soon. That way you'll be forced to make friends and find other things to do on your own and you won't feel like you moved solely for him if things don't work out.
  • keem88
    keem88 Posts: 1,689 Member
    do what you feel you want to do, don't second guess things. if it doesn't work out, then it doesn't work out and you can go on and move forward from there.
    my guy is moving 700 miles with me back to my home state of ny. we live in ohio now, i stayed out there after college to be with him for a little while (that turned into 2 years LOL). he didn't even second guess it, he said wherever you go i will be going too. been together almost 3 years but the time together doesn't matter.
    do what you feel is best, and if you want to be with him, then do it.
    the carolinas sound awesome to live in anyways. :D
    best of luck with your decision, it can be a tough one to make sometimes.
  • ekicinsk
    ekicinsk Posts: 92 Member
    I moved to Charlotte for my boy about a year ago after dating for a year and we're getting married next spriing! NC is great! (ignore the politics) and see, you can know me now so you won't know only him. Problem.Solved.

    And if you're a steelers fan, there's plenty of those people here too (blegh! go packers!) so you'll feel right at home minus the snow anyways!
  • skinnyack
    skinnyack Posts: 683
    Uhm... awkward. I've lived this before. I'd say as long as you know you can move there and be happy regardless of him, pursue an awesome career, or be able to move again if it goes sour. GO FOR IT. I love North Carolina. I love it. I loved a boy who we phone dated exclusively for over a year- new eachother as kids- same thing- , and decided to move out there not only for him who we'd already talked about marriage etc, but because I liked it everytime I visited (I was born to be southern) and I thought I would kill it in a job transfer and make more money. Unfortunately he ruined my North Carolina pipe dream by becoming a ridiculous immature tool 2 Months before I moved, yet after I had gotten rid of a lot of my stuff and told everyone I was moving. Regardless, I would still love to move there. With my now fiance- who is awesome. I would love to move anywhere. I love change. So if you are of the same adventuresome mentality- GO FOR IT. Here's how I knew I could've moved: After the break up- when everyone said "well thank God you didn't move" I was like... Oh heck no. I would've been fine there all by myself.
  • gklangdon
    gklangdon Posts: 80 Member
    I was living in Florida when I met this man while he was on vacation. Two months after meeting him I moved in with him. Married him a year and a half after that and I'll be celebrating my 12 year anniversary in July.

    I will tell you that it was VERY HARD to just move in with him and we had a lot of disagreements about stupid stuff. I'd never lived with a guy before, so it was quite an adjustment. We worked through our difficulties and really learned how to communicate with each other. Communication is KEY!

    Since you're asking for advice I would say move to NC. Get a job there first. Get an apartment (month to month lease if possible) on your own and date him. See if you still click. See how well you do in his environment. Make new friends and keep your old ones too.

    Good luck on your new adventure.
  • samcee
    samcee Posts: 307
    I did move for love in my early twenties but he ended up cheating on me. So make sure you have a plan B and doing it for more reasons than love alone. I think it'd be a great opportunity to be someplace new and exploring new things. Just take things slow.

    I'm not sure if I would move again for love.. I would for the right person and at a location where I am happy at..
  • Kagard11
    Kagard11 Posts: 396 Member
    DO IT!!!!! You have noting to lose, just live separately at first so you can make YOUR way in the world regardless of whether it works out or not with him!
  • GO_NadZ_xO
    GO_NadZ_xO Posts: 445 Member
    My boyfriend moved from South Australia to New South Wales just to be with me after we were dating for 8 months.

    He left everything he knew behind and all he knew here was me. He was 19 years old and his family and friends were his whole life. I still feel bad that he came here and left everyone he loved, but I plan to move back with him there one day.. well I hope so.

    I would have done the same for him if it were possible.
  • celebrity328
    celebrity328 Posts: 377 Member
    My husband took a "3 month assignment" in Texas. So I stayed up in WA finished college... what was suppose to be only 3 months ended up being 1.5 years. After 6 months of being apart he asked me to quit my job (good paying one) and move my cats and me down to Texas for a year. Came back to WA state after being gone a year and it took me almost 2 years to find a crappy job :(

    People move all the time for jobs/lovers etc.. If you are willing to drop everything and move for a person I say go for it. I really liked living in Texas the people are awesome and food is great. Only thing I really struggled with was being alone (husband was working 12-15 hours a day) and the move from Washington State to Texas took a toll on my animals and I felt very bad for them.. poor kitty got car sick :(! The only other thing that I didnt like about moving across the US was that I was far away from my family and I knew no one! but I was with my husband so it all worked out in the end :)
  • crisanderson27
    crisanderson27 Posts: 5,343 Member
    Don't move for love.....move because North Carolina is better than Pennsylvania.

    And for love =D.
  • trijoe
    trijoe Posts: 729 Member
    My girlfriend and I lived in southern Kentucky till she moved to Alabama for her graduate work. At first we tried a long distance relationship, but that sucked out loud. So, throwing caution to the wind, I found a culinary apprenticeship program in the area, signed myself up, loaded up all my belongings in the back of my dad's pickup truck, and followed her down to Alabama. That was 1993. We married in 1995. Since then, we've moved 8 times (5 of which were cross country), had 3 kids and 1 doggie, all as she pursued her career. I've had multiple job changes and 3 career changes myself, eventually becoming a Stay At Home Dad as her career played out into monster hours but decent pay.

    You never know how "following" other people will pan out. It depends on many factors, such as the stability of you two's relationship, your own sense of self fulfillment (you HAVE to be able to find your own fulfillment if you want this to work - HAVE TO), and your (and his) comfort level with complete upheaval.

    Good luck, whatever you decide.
  • jenny95662
    jenny95662 Posts: 997 Member
    i did it at 23 and it was best choice i made now i have been married for almost 7 years 2 great children :) we were together for 5 months when i moved with him.
  • soontobesam
    soontobesam Posts: 714 Member
    Three cheers to love! :drinker:
  • Suziq1023
    Suziq1023 Posts: 46 Member
    I would move for love. I would move for a better paying job. I would move for better weather. I would move for a nicer house or better neighborhood. I would NOT stay someplace just because that's where I was. You are at EXACTLY the right age to spread your wings and see what the world has to offer. Certainly don't wait until you're 45 or 50 to start. This advice given freely by a 58 year old woman.
  • amymeenieminymo
    amymeenieminymo Posts: 2,394 Member
    Go for it, it can still be about YOU despite the fact that you're moving where HE is. Twenty years ago my cousin moved to Seattle with a boyfriend....things didn't work out with him but she loved Seattle so much she dragged her entire family there (sister and her husband, brother, parents). They all loved it and it has been home to the whole family and my three cousins have all started and raised their families there.
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