TIME magazine and breast feeding a 4 year old

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Replies

  • stormieweather
    stormieweather Posts: 2,549 Member
    ~sbip~

    By that age they are exposed to tv, video games and realize what things are sexualized.

    If your child is aware of sexuality at age 3, they're viewing inappropriate material.

    A 3 year should not be exposed to sexual content. The issue here is completely with the viewer of that photo on Time, not that a 3 yr old thinks nursing has a sexual connotation. :huh:

    My opinion is that how long to breastfeed is completely the parents decision. It is absolutely none of my business. Period.
  • firstnamekaren
    firstnamekaren Posts: 274 Member
    If she is so hell bent on making sure her child gets breast milk, she could pump and serve it to him in a sippy cup. She is not going to bond her child to her by breast feeding this late in the game. If anything she's going to make him feel like an outcast. If a child is capable of getting his own drink, hooking him up to the tit is just perversion on her part, and will probably scar the boy. I'm probably going to get blasted by people, but it's just my opinion. And I also breast fed both of my children until they were about 6 months old, both are healthy, happy well adjusted kids, and are well bonded with me.

    Perversion?? Are you serious?? It's people like YOU that give breastfeeding a stigma!!! Probably scar the boy? HA that is a joke!
  • opus649
    opus649 Posts: 633 Member
    Honestly, when your kid is starting school and socializing with other children... It's time to stop breastfeeding. I don't see anything wrong with prolonged breastfeeding, not at all, but there is no reason you can't pump it.

    The arguments from "attachment parenting" people are all so fake. The mom on the Time magazine cover says that she remembers breastfeeding and feeling so loved, like her mother would never leave her. Well, good luck coping when your mother finally does leave you. There's a difference between giving milk as nourishment to your child, and having your child breastfeed at an advanced age because you are obsessed with attachment.

    Just hug your kids, they don't need to latch onto your nipple in order to feel loved.

    It's a good thing we have you to tell us all how to raise our kids.
  • happyfrogg
    happyfrogg Posts: 86 Member
    I think the only reason the cover was gross was because of the way the two were posed. It was posed as a sexual looking scene rather than a natural, nuturing moment.

    Yes, this right here.
  • CrazyLazyStylist
    CrazyLazyStylist Posts: 65 Member
    Even if I was slippin my kid the nip at 3 I wouldnt put it on a mag so he could be embarassed 10 (15, 20) years from now. Who knows, maybe he'll still be thirsty then too.
  • BeckyProctor
    BeckyProctor Posts: 56 Member
    Though I would never consider it, I have no problem with her breastfeeding a 3 year old. I do think it is wrong to put the that photo on the front of a magazine. What happens in a few years when one of his classmates stumbles upon the picture (or hears his mother gossiping about it)? I can't imagine the teasing and bullying that he may have to endure.
  • sjiphone
    sjiphone Posts: 67 Member
    It's a mother's right. This mom has decided that it is in the best interests of her child to continue breastfeeding and she should be supported. Society is too down on breastfeeding. Lighten up.
  • mamnboston
    mamnboston Posts: 81
    I agree. I am a Time Magazine subscriber and found the photo to be shocking but I think that was their goal. And yes, the way the mother and child are positioned was offensive. Haven't read the article yet but has certainly stirred my interest...
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
    It's a good thing we have you to tell us all how to raise our kids.

    "Raise our kids" is an interesting way of saying "imprison our children in perpetual infancy"
  • Contrary03
    Contrary03 Posts: 289 Member
    My son has a friend who is the same age -(5).. the whole family sleeps in the same bed~ father, mother, brother (12) and him. Not sure if breastfeeding was involved. The child is not right. Very immature for his age and has a habit lately of wanting to completely undress when my son is over. For this reason, i no longer let them play. Everything we do as parents affect our children. Some personal choices are good, while some are wrong in my opinion. Breastfeeding past bottle age or sleeping together for that long can't be healthy.:noway:
  • WonderCort
    WonderCort Posts: 123 Member
    I am a mother of three who breast fed, having said that I am so tired of the big magazines using sensationalism to make a buck.
  • rossi02
    rossi02 Posts: 549 Member
    If she is so hell bent on making sure her child gets breast milk, she could pump and serve it to him in a sippy cup. She is not going to bond her child to her by breast feeding this late in the game. If anything she's going to make him feel like an outcast. If a child is capable of getting his own drink, hooking him up to the tit is just perversion on her part, and will probably scar the boy. I'm probably going to get blasted by people, but it's just my opinion. And I also breast fed both of my children until they were about 6 months old, both are healthy, happy well adjusted kids, and are well bonded with me.

    What schools did you study at, or research team did you work on to come up with what you stated above? Because while pregnant, I read several books by people who've studied this and monitored children as they progressed through the years to see what the long term affects are.. and if the child even remembers nursing and they all stated the exact opposite of you.
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
    I feel really badly for the kid on the cover, because he's going to be "that kid sucking his mom's breast" for quite some time.
  • jamiesadler
    jamiesadler Posts: 634 Member
    I think BF is great. However seeing a4 year old attached to the boob is a bit disturbing. Pump and give them a glass. There are numerous benefits to breast milk so I agree with continuing to give it to a child much longer than the standard 12 months.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Time magazine accomplished what they had hoped to accomplish. They caused controversy and sold magazines. There is no "set in stone" date for when breast feeding should halt, but every family dynamic is different. I think it's a little excessive, but what do I know and it's nobody's business to chime in to that family's practices.

    Being breastfed for an extended period is a far sight better than being ignored or abused.
  • dia77
    dia77 Posts: 410 Member
    This!
    We are going to brestfeed them all thier life? It is not natural? Look at animals, they know better !
  • va_va_voom
    va_va_voom Posts: 467 Member


    I think there are many components to attachment parenting and don't feel you have to have a check mark by each of them to say that your parenting mode fits the attachment parenting concept.

    Bascially, that was a long way to say I don't feel you have to EBF past the age of one or two to fall into the attachement parenting catagory. :)

    I love what you said about not feeling like you have to check mark each aspect of attachment parenting. I actually posted the mag cover on my FB status and a really good discussion resulted from it. Part of the discussion was about the "Mommy wars" and how moms on either side of the fence can make the other feel badly for their choices.

    Parenting is not an easy road to navigate and I ultimately feel like each mom needs to find what works for her/her child(ren) and go with it.

    *MY* issue with the mag cover is the nature of the pose and the emotions it evokes. If they're trying to promote attachment parenting and/or EBF, they've gone about it all the wrong way and for what? A few more dollars in mag sales b/c the cover is controversial? Boo!
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
    Time magazine accomplished what they had hoped to accomplish. They caused controversy and sold magazines.

    This is exactly it. It's not about breastfeeding one way or the other... It's about revenue.
  • cspong
    cspong Posts: 260 Member
    Well its none of anyone's business how long any woman chooses to breastfeed.... And yes this woman is in a magazine so, yes, we all are entitled to our opinions but I currently breastfeed my 7 month old and people already look at me funny for having an older baby breastfeeding.

    Its ridiculous. The recommended age is up until at least a year old. The nutrition and benefits don't randomly stop at a year old or once they are no longer a newborn (which a lot of people seem to think is when it gets gross).

    While I probably won't breastfeed that long, its not gross, and she shouldn't have to pump and put it in a cup just to make all of you comfortable.
  • momofJandA
    momofJandA Posts: 1,035 Member
    WHO recommends MINIMUM two years. And both the APA and WHO agree on the same principle: breastfeed as long as it continues to be agreeable to both child and mother. The kid will wean on his or her own. Or the mother will reach a point where she's ready to stop.

    Sorry, this thread really pisses me off. I can't believe that in the year 2012 mothers have to defend themselves for breast feeding for crying out loud. What the hell do you think women have breasts for????

    ^^^^^^couldn't agree more

    Breastfed both of my kids- son stopped at 12 months because I got pregnant with my daughter and HE chose to wean. I am still nursing my daughter (26 months). I have no plans to wean any time soon.

    I am not going to bombard everyone with articles and studies (done in both third world AND western societies) that show the benefits of breastfeeding past a year and even past 2 years- for both child and mother- because in all honesty your not going to read them anyway, but if your interested a simple google search of "benefits of extended breastfeeding" will supply you with hundreds of SCIENTIFIC studies- not someone's opinion.

    My kids were both walking, talking, signing little people with teeth by the age of 6 months- so the whole "if they can ask for it they are too old" is a load of bull. My son got his first 2 bottom teeth at 3 months- so that the whole "once they have teeth" is bull. Children will wean when they are ready- why rush them? They grow up so damn fast to begin with- what's wrong with 10 minutes together in the morning/night/or during the day. I will agree that nursing isn't always about nutritional value (although mommy's milk continues to have an adundance of nutritional value as long as it is still being produced). I am her mother I am there to provide both emotional and nutrional support. She will one day stop asking for mommy's milk. Until that day, whether for her nutrional or emotional needs- when she asks for it she gets it.
  • va_va_voom
    va_va_voom Posts: 467 Member
    I feel really badly for the kid on the cover, because he's going to be "that kid sucking his mom's breast" for quite some time.

    One of the first thoughts that popped into my head when I saw it was, "How is he going to feel about this cover when he's an adult?" Who knows - maybe he will be fine with it. But, I guarantee he will dread the locker room in HS if it rears its ugly head during his teen years.
  • starsnyc21
    starsnyc21 Posts: 436 Member
    This is disturbing...fast forward 20 years and I want to see if these kids has serious mommy issues.
  • BOLO4Hagtha
    BOLO4Hagtha Posts: 396 Member
    I find it interesting all the posters who say something along the lines of "XX is too old. I don't have a problem with a mother giving her child breast milk, but If the kiddo wants the milk, put it in a cup/bottle/sippy." So the issue, for many, isn't that the mother is still lactating and the child still drinking, but the bothersome fact is that the milk comes from BREASTS. Newsflash. Milk from every mammal comes from tits/teats/breasts. That's just nature. Cows' milk comes from cow teats. Oh, but wait, cows' teats aren't sexualized by society and their biological purpose isn't sigmatized. When you think about it, which is weirder? A mother feeding her child milk that was biologically designed for that child and changes over time to meet the child's growing needs, or milk that was designed for a baby cow?

    Do you know any people that latch their mouth onto a cow's tit to get milk?
  • twistofcain
    twistofcain Posts: 190
    I still breast feed with my mom....er.

    No, now it's from your wife. :P

    Well you are a mom! :p
  • embclark
    embclark Posts: 186 Member
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.

    ^THIS^
  • opus649
    opus649 Posts: 633 Member
    It's a good thing we have you to tell us all how to raise our kids.

    "Raise our kids" is an interesting way of saying "imprison our children in perpetual infancy"

    That is probably the stupidest thing I've ever heard another human say. Congratulations.
  • Welshie_girl
    Welshie_girl Posts: 107 Member
    I'll add it to the list of "things that don't affect my life even a little."
    [/quote

    Same here
  • kaetmarie
    kaetmarie Posts: 668 Member
    It's not about breastfeeding vs. not breastfeeding ... it's about how long is too long, in my opinion.

    Maybe it is the norm to bf until age 17 in other countries (you get my point) -- but we live HERE and that is not the norm, like it or not. While it's all fine and well to compare norms across cultures, it's also meaningless ... because unless you are tilling the land for your own food and making treks daily to get water, it's just not the same.

    Bottom line: We live in a place where people can make these choices about how long to bf, discuss these choices, and pass judgment on others for having different opinions. To each their own! I personally plan on breastfeeding, but only until they can eat solid food. ETA: I also plan on working while my kids are young.

    So if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get back to making more money than my husband so I can stop by the grocery store and buy vegetables I didn't grow and chicken I didn't slaughter myself.
  • Eve1972
    Eve1972 Posts: 297 Member
    I think the point of the cover was to spark just this kind of debate. I think that all of the people who say breastfeeding at 3 or 4 is "weird" or "unnatural" are dead wrong and it's long past the time when the United States needs to move past the sexualization of the breast.

    WHO recommends MINIMUM two years. And both the APA and WHO agree on the same principle: breastfeed as long as it continues to be agreeable to both child and mother. The kid will wean on his or her own. Or the mother will reach a point where she's ready to stop.

    Sorry, this thread really pisses me off. I can't believe that in the year 2012 mothers have to defend themselves for breast feeding for crying out loud. What the hell do you think women have breasts for????

    I think I love you!! (In a totally non creepy way! *lol*)
  • SeasideOasis
    SeasideOasis Posts: 1,057 Member
    I am not a mother.

    Having done some research on BFing, however, I have read there are A LOT of different things that are positive about breast milk, so I could see why the idea of BFing till they are older would be a benefit.

    My problem with it is, you ween children off bottles, "binkies", out of cribs, etc - So why wouldn't you just put the pumped breast milk into a cup? Mixed with cereal or oatmeal?

    Sadly, why the mother is standing "Loud And Proud' on this cover, how will "he" feel in middle school or high school when it is just one more piece of ammo for some kid to use against him (as we all know, kids are mean)? I feel as though, while she has "his best interest" at hand for the physical reason, at that moment, I am not sure she took into consideration that that cover could be a psychological harm for him in the future.

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