Older man with Younger Woman (Ladies Only)

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Replies

  • Elle408
    Elle408 Posts: 500 Member
    I've only really dated older men. I generally look for them to be around ten years older, sometimes more... and this sounds ridiculous but I find it's because I'm an older soul... I don't enjoy things that men the same age as me do. I like wine bars and theatre trips and good meals in good restaurants. I have yet to meet a guy in his twenties that is happy to come and watch Opera with me. (And I certainly wouldn't discount him if he did.) So yeah, I guess for me, it's an attitude thing more than an age thing. I don't like clubbing or drinking excessive alcohol, I don't like guys who sit around all day playing video games either and older men tend not to do that. I know it's a huge generalisation, but it's one that has proved true for me time and again.
  • nikki2609
    nikki2609 Posts: 128
    Been there. Done that. Age aint nothin but a number!!

    married for 4 & half years, i'm 36 he's 47, works fine. taken on my daughter as his own, he has has lived his 'wild boy' life & is now happy to be content. :smile:
  • Donnacoach
    Donnacoach Posts: 540 Member
    My hubby is 14.5 years older then me and we have been married for almost 27 years. My daughter is seeing someone who is 17 years older then her and seems very happy. Whatever works. It's about the heart not the numbers.
  • delilah47
    delilah47 Posts: 1,658
    When I was 21, I married my second husband who was 36 (yes, I got an early start..first married at 17 and divorced at 20.. stupid stupid stupid then 2nd time another stupid mistake, but cured me of wanting to marry again). It was okay for about 5 years, then he wanted to stay home all the time and I wanted to go do things like hike, go to public events, etc. He just got tired I guess. We got divorced 35 years ago. (Glad I never had kids, because I never trusted myself to hang in a marriage and I didn't want to be a single mother.) Then, he got very ill and I came here (100 miles from where I was living) to take care of him for the last few years of his life. That was over 7 years ago. I guess he got even with me!:laugh: :laugh: Anyway, on top of his illness, he now has terminal cancer and isn't expected to live more than a few more months. I am now 64 and he is 79. I came here at 57. This isn't exactly how I pictured "golden years". After he passes away, I'm not sure what I will do. Lost contact with my entire life by committing myself to this "project". And no, I have never been, nor will I ever be compensated for these years.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    I sort of dated a guy who was 10 years older than me. I didn't have a problem with it. I would do it again. Everybody's different, why would I disqualify someone who is great and has the same goals as me, just because they're older?
  • LiddyBit
    LiddyBit Posts: 447 Member
    My husband is 10 years older than me. We have a great marriage.
  • munchketeer
    munchketeer Posts: 5
    There's nothing wrong with dating an older man as long as you enjoy each other's company and have common interests. I think that the age difference doesn't matter if you are happy and doing things together as a couple. The only thing I would question would be if the age difference was over 15 years or more. Sometimes, tho not in all cases, the age difference of a decade or more can cause problems. For example....If the man, or woman, is over 10 years older, the other partner may have a major difference in music, movie, clothing styles, places to hang out, etc..... Also, if the older person is insecure in the relationship, they may feel threatened by the younger partner's youthful appearance and relationships with other friends their age. It may lead to jealousy and mis-trust issues.
  • Marillian
    Marillian Posts: 3,892 Member
    Firstly, opinions can be neither right nor wrong, so saying this woman is "wrong" in her opinion is.... well, wrong. You both are entitled to disagree, but she is not wrong in her opinion. Then again, opinions are like a@@holes, everyone has one.

    Having said that, I believe it depends on how young the woman is. If she is in her 20s, then I don't think it's a good idea because so much "growing up" happens in the 20s. But, if a woman is in her 30s and beyond, then I believe it's perfectly fine, as long it is a healthy relationship and neither party has "daddy-daughter" issues.

    When I was in my early 40s, I dated a man 16 years older than I. We were together for 4 years and planning to spend our lives together. That came to end when he died very suddenly from a coronary event. Would I be with him had I known he had a heart condition? Absolutely. Any time spent loving and being loved is well worth it.

    I'm happily married now, to a man 8 years younger than I, but my past experience had no bearing on that. We didn't ask each others' ages for months after we began dating. It just wasn't an issue or important.
  • Topsking2010
    Topsking2010 Posts: 2,245 Member
    The subject came up when I told this woman I didn't have any kids and I was too old for children. She said that there are plenty of women that would have children with a 49 year old man and age did not matter. I was a little surprise by her answer and still have my doubts.
  • mrmanmeat
    mrmanmeat Posts: 1,968 Member
    Remember fellas, 15 (age) will get ya 20 (years in prison).

    I've typically dated younger, but I'm currently interested in a girl who's a year older than me. Diff change of pace for sure, which is nice. I like it.
  • lauralizzy829
    lauralizzy829 Posts: 215 Member
    My current BF is 14 years older than me. I'm 25, he's 39. And I know the stereotype of the older rich man spoiling the girl. I actually make more $ than him so no big gifts there. But I think it's maybe a different mind set. He refuses to let me pay for drinks or meals out. It was this way when we were just friends before we were dating. In my experience, I've never had a guy closer to my own age have those "rules". He says that its not a point of argument for him bc that's how it should be. I don't complain, but it does irk me sometimes and I make it up by stocking him with beer and gin haha.
    We've talked about marriage, but he is opposed to having kids of his own bc he was born with spina bifida. So until we actually make the big plunge into getting hitched, adoption or other methods aren't getting discussed.

    So maybe this was more of a therapy session, but thanks for reading! Hahaha
  • CoachMaritova
    CoachMaritova Posts: 409 Member
    My ex was 26 years older than me, and we have 3 children.
  • quruuxley
    quruuxley Posts: 20
    I have a slightly different approach to the older man interest.

    I am married to a man my age. And as much as I fantasize about having married someone 10+ years older (money, career, goals set), I am financially ambitious, and I have goals for overseas business. I personally do not know of any reasons men date such younger than themselves (10 +yrs younger!) other than sexual reasons - beautiful, funny, attractive. Maybe even less jaded than the women their own age. How can I expect this man to support me 100% in my endeavours, advise me and encourage me, when he views me as being younger and therefore less aware/experienced/able to make sound decisions on my own?

    I'd hate to feel like I'm being either coddled or chided, should business mistakes occur(and they will).

    Date a man confidant enough to be with a woman his own age. No weird mentalities or fetishes from either of us, just a life partner with no other expectations. Is that too idealistic?
  • lavlei
    lavlei Posts: 26
    I've only really dated older men. I generally look for them to be around ten years older, sometimes more... and this sounds ridiculous but I find it's because I'm an older soul... I don't enjoy things that men the same age as me do. I like wine bars and theatre trips and good meals in good restaurants. I have yet to meet a guy in his twenties that is happy to come and watch Opera with me. (And I certainly wouldn't discount him if he did.) So yeah, I guess for me, it's an attitude thing more than an age thing. I don't like clubbing or drinking excessive alcohol, I don't like guys who sit around all day playing video games either and older men tend not to do that. I know it's a huge generalisation, but it's one that has proved true for me time and again.

    ^^ YES!
  • mrtentaclenun
    mrtentaclenun Posts: 174 Member
    My boyfriend and I have been together two and a half years. He is 14 years older than me.
  • jetscreaminagain
    jetscreaminagain Posts: 1,130 Member
    I dated a man twice my age at the time. It was an intense amazing supportive great relationship. I would've had babies with him. For a variety of reasons, mostly life circumstances and choices related to careers and other things, it didn't work out. But I often wonder.

    Time has passed. I'm married now and my hubs is 6 years older than me.
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
    I once worked with a lady who was 49, her hubs was 75.
  • micls
    micls Posts: 234
    Firstly, opinions can be neither right nor wrong, so saying this woman is "wrong" in her opinion is.... well, wrong. You both are entitled to disagree, but she is not wrong in her opinion. Then again, opinions are like a@@holes, everyone has one.

    Yes, opinions can be wrong. If I say that in my opinion one race of people are better than another, then I'm wrong, opinion or not. In a more clearcut way if I say it's my opinion that a tomato isn't a fruit, well again I'm wrong. Opinion doesn't mean it's infallible or unquestionable!

    Not really sure I understand the op. Are you saying you don't believe some women marry and raise families with people 10-15 years older than them? Because opinion or not, well, you're wrong (if that's what you were saying, I'm not sure).
  • kitkatwag
    kitkatwag Posts: 82 Member
    My husband is 12 years older than me. I wouldnt have thought in the past that I would have married with such an age gap, but the timeing in each of our lives was right and we are the most perfect match. I think it depends on several factors that are in play and not just age. BTW we have been married just over a year. We had both been married before to other people for a very long time.
  • lauralizzy829
    lauralizzy829 Posts: 215 Member
    My boyfriend and I have been together two and a half years. He is 14 years older than me.

    Omfg, I love your ticker. That's hilarious.
  • jesilva80
    jesilva80 Posts: 287 Member
    My husband is 2 months short of being 10 years older than I. We have 1 daughter. I know a couple with a 22 year age difference(dating for 10 years-not married)
  • jenjay76
    jenjay76 Posts: 42
    I personally don't think I would have anything in common with someone that much older than me. My limit would probably 5-7 years older than myself. I'm 35 and I cannot imagine being with a 50 yr old.
  • SophiaSwimGirl
    SophiaSwimGirl Posts: 1
    A friend of mine is married to someone who is twenty years older. They are perfectly happy, and have a beautiful daughter.
  • k2quiere
    k2quiere Posts: 4,151 Member
    I dated a guy who was 10 years older than I was. We were together off and on for 15 years. I had to move on, and now he realizes what he had...oh well, such is life. Now I'm engaged to a guy 3 years younger...go figure.
  • cyn4him
    cyn4him Posts: 83 Member
    Have not read all the posts yet, but I assure you there are. My step mom used to be my best friend. She is three years older than me
    Her and my dad had kids at same time as I did. So my brothers are 16 and 13. My sons are 10, 13, and 15. She was with my father til he died. 17 years her senior.
    Now she is with another man who is I believe 18 years her senior. Also married him.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Why would you think that wasn't true? Are all couples like that imaginary?
  • FlyeredUp
    FlyeredUp Posts: 632 Member
    Ladies thank you for your support of us old timers!:flowerforyou:
  • Tristis
    Tristis Posts: 288 Member
    I know a lot of chicks who date older men. I personally haven't...don't know if I would.
  • AllTehBeers
    AllTehBeers Posts: 5,030 Member
    I'm in my mid 20s and most (not all) of the guys my age act like frat boys. That's not my thing at all, please give me a man with some brains.
  • luvmydog2
    luvmydog2 Posts: 243 Member
    :wink: My hubby is only 3 years older than me .... and our likes and dislikes are so ...different . :laugh
    Could not imagine being with an older man ....hubby makes me mad now ...with his old fashioned ideas . and tunnel vision .lol .
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