HELP!!! or i am leaving

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  • charcharbec
    charcharbec Posts: 253 Member
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    I used to weigh almost 300 pounds.

    I didn't have much of a support system in real life or on here.

    I have a special needs child, my marriage was failing (now over), I work full time, I am bipolar, and...

    I did it anyway.

    So, you have a couple of choices:

    You can make excuses to not get in shape, or you can work your *kitten* off to get in shape.

    Seems pretty simple to me.

    Just wanted to let you know, Jessicaruby is on my friends list, she does try actively to get in shape, hence why she's frustrated, it's really just coming down to a numbers game. Though the post seems desperate, I think it's more just frustration making her come across this way. I don't think she's making any excuses, nor do I think she isn't working her butt off. This was kinda unwarranted IMO. She just really needs to dial in and apply herself to finding the right balance.

    Here, here Ebby!! You're so ****ing awesome.

    Honestly--- it sounds to me like certain people feel that judging someone by NOT knowing what they are doing instead of giving advice (the POINT of these threads I would like to think) is the proper approach. Not gonna lie-- honestly, I can totally understand that frustration. The thing to remember is not ALL of our bodies work the same. What works for her may not work for me. I know people at my box that can eat 10 pieces of bread in a sitting and not gain a thing, and others if they indulge even just slightly, gain 3 lbs. I personally havent found exactly what works for me. Unfortunately, you tried something and it didn't work for you. That's OK. There are other things you can try..... just remember to give everything at least 4-6 weeks to see if they work. And don't change everything at once. One thing at a time will help you know WHAT works.

    You got this girl. **** the people that clearly sit on their high horse, and instead of offering advice, would rather tout around about how amazing they clearly (read: sarcasm) are. Just be patient. Trust me, it sucks. One day at a time. :)
  • gsager
    gsager Posts: 977 Member
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    i am 25yrs old, mother of two (5 and 6). i am 5'7 and as of today weigh 148.8lbs. after being here for a while i decided i didnt want to just be skinny i wanted muscles. i went for a bulk/cut cycle. BIG MISTAKE!!! i bulked for 4months gaining 15lbs and 12 total inches. i bulked on 2400cals lifting heavy full body 3x a week/cardio 3x a week. then i started cutting. i dropped down to 2000cals and contuined my workouts. i wasnt losing so i dropped down to 1900 cals. still hardly a thing happened. i went on vacation to costa rica. april 9th for 10days. (weighed about 147) and couldnt work out (did alot of activities and walking though) and i piged out(no computer or phone= no logging) it was well worth it and i had a blast. got back home lowered my cals to about 1500 for a week to help make up for eating so much, then settled at 1800 cals. still doing my exericse routine. for almost two weeks now i have altered my diet by cutting out bread(i ate at least 2x a day) and replacing it with more complex carbs such as brown rice and oats. i started monitering my sugar ( i was ALWAYS over) and make sure i stay under 35grams a day. i aim for 180-200 grams of protein sometimes i even get in more. all i drink is water and my diet has been well under control since i got back. I am now back up to 148.8lbs and have only lost 2inches from my waist(at my bellybutton). What am i doing wrong???!!!!!

    I have tried eating more, eating less, eating more protien, eating more clean, giving up foods, lifting more, running more, intervals, and still nothing. i have heard to get the toned, muscular look i want (goal is my profile pic) that i need to eat very low carb. i tried this for a day and i was hungry and super super super tired all day. i have seen others on here doing what i do and eating 12 pieces of bread a day and look like i want to......i just dont get what i am doing wrong and why nothing works for me. before i started on this sitei weighed 130lbs and ate whatever, whenever i wanted.

    Sounds like your flipping around too much. I'm 5'2" and have gotten to my goal weight and am eating about 2000 cal a day and still losing. I think that you need to be consistent with something.
  • HeidiMightyRawr
    HeidiMightyRawr Posts: 3,343 Member
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    For a accurate answer, tell us what your workout routine is. What is your calorie deficit?

    You want to be slim and toned. The "dream body" that it seems every woman wants.

    Here is my best advice...

    NO MORE HEAVY WEIGHTS!!!! Woman don't look good bulky in my opinion... Thats exactly whats going to happen if you keep lifting heavy and eating more than your burning. I would suggest circuit training and plyometics for your exercises. No weights needed, just do a google search on different body weight exercises.

    Or just do p90x or insanity, when you do it, commit to it don't cheat yourself don't half *kitten* it... Just do it and get it out of the way. Once you mastered p90x pick up a different routine like the 300 workout...

    Most important part is diet... Just watch your calories... I wouldn't go over 1400 if I were you. Take a dietary supplement to help with the food cravings, water also helps.

    What complete ignorance!

    For a start, she stated herself that the body she is after is one with muscles, so for you to tell her that women don't look good bulky (I'm assuming you mean with muscles) is completely going against HER goals, and what she would like.

    Secondly, myself and several other women on here lift heavy and changes in how they look have been better than ever! Slim, toned, whatever you want to call it. After losing weight (lifting heavy the whole time) and then "bulking" to gain some mass, I ended up back at my starting weight. However, I was 5% less body fat and could fit into clothes I couldn't previously, at the same weight. How, may I ask, is that bulky?!

    Women don't get bulky. Certainly not easily. It takes a lot of time, a lot of specific lifting for size (not just heavy weights) and a lot of food over a sustained period of time. Look at female olympic weightlifers in the lower weight categories. They obviously lift heavy, but a lot of them don't look any different to a normal sized healthy, toned woman.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    i am 25yrs old, mother of two (5 and 6). i am 5'7 and as of today weigh 148.8lbs. after being here for a while i decided i didnt want to just be skinny i wanted muscles. i went for a bulk/cut cycle. BIG MISTAKE!!! i bulked for 4months gaining 15lbs and 12 total inches. i bulked on 2400cals lifting heavy full body 3x a week/cardio 3x a week. then i started cutting. i dropped down to 2000cals and contuined my workouts. i wasnt losing so i dropped down to 1900 cals. still hardly a thing happened. i went on vacation to costa rica. april 9th for 10days. (weighed about 147) and couldnt work out (did alot of activities and walking though) and i piged out(no computer or phone= no logging) it was well worth it and i had a blast. got back home lowered my cals to about 1500 for a week to help make up for eating so much, then settled at 1800 cals. still doing my exericse routine. for almost two weeks now i have altered my diet by cutting out bread(i ate at least 2x a day) and replacing it with more complex carbs such as brown rice and oats. i started monitering my sugar ( i was ALWAYS over) and make sure i stay under 35grams a day. i aim for 180-200 grams of protein sometimes i even get in more. all i drink is water and my diet has been well under control since i got back. I am now back up to 148.8lbs and have only lost 2inches from my waist(at my bellybutton). What am i doing wrong???!!!!!

    I have tried eating more, eating less, eating more protien, eating more clean, giving up foods, lifting more, running more, intervals, and still nothing. i have heard to get the toned, muscular look i want (goal is my profile pic) that i need to eat very low carb. i tried this for a day and i was hungry and super super super tired all day. i have seen others on here doing what i do and eating 12 pieces of bread a day and look like i want to......i just dont get what i am doing wrong and why nothing works for me. before i started on this sitei weighed 130lbs and ate whatever, whenever i wanted.

    For a accurate answer, tell us what your workout routine is. What is your calorie deficit?

    You want to be slim and toned. The "dream body" that it seems every woman wants.

    Here is my best advice...

    NO MORE HEAVY WEIGHTS!!!! Woman don't look good bulky in my opinion... Thats exactly whats going to happen if you keep lifting heavy and eating more than your burning. I would suggest circuit training and plyometics for your exercises. No weights needed, just do a google search on different body weight exercises.

    Or just do p90x or insanity, when you do it, commit to it don't cheat yourself don't half *kitten* it... Just do it and get it out of the way. Once you mastered p90x pick up a different routine like the 300 workout...

    Most important part is diet... Just watch your calories... I wouldn't go over 1400 if I were you. Take a dietary supplement to help with the food cravings, water also helps.

    smh . . . over and over and over again.

    I'm really hoping that this is a joke, because the amount of crap information in it has me about laying on the floor peeing myself with laughter.

    Have you lost the inches? Your scale is going to look crazy different than it did before the lean mass increase, trust me. Along with your weight training, are you doiing any hiit?
  • Jessicaruby
    Jessicaruby Posts: 881 Member
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    i just started incoporating some HIIT into my routines and i like it!!! i guess i jus need to keep at it. i just gets frustrating when others do the same things and end up with the body i want in less time. i feel like i am doing something wrong because i dont look toned or muscular at all......JUST FAT :frown:
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    i just started incoporating some HIIT into my routines and i like it!!! i guess i jus need to keep at it. i just gets frustrating when others do the same things and end up with the body i want in less time. i feel like i am doing something wrong because i dont look toned or muscular at all......JUST FAT :frown:

    Give it a little more time. If your consistently netting around 1600 you should start seeing results, you cut this too small and you'll start seeing a quicker loss on the scale but you risk a higher percentage of loss coming from lean mass. The balance isn't just in losing fat, but in doing it slowly enough to conserve as much lean mass as possible. Continue lifting, embrace that hiit (I love it man, talk about exhausting), keep on keeping on, maintain your rest day, and remember that each of us has a different body. I look at someone and think "damn I want that *kitten*" but I have no problem showing ab definition. Keep your cool, let the numbers go for 4 weeks, and see what happens. While your at it, see if you can find a different way to measure, try bf% rather than weight.
  • Jessicaruby
    Jessicaruby Posts: 881 Member
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    thanks for the tips. i will contuine with 1800 netting around 1600 and keep up my newly found love of HIIT. i dont want to eat any less because i want to maintain my muscle
  • ChrisGoldn
    ChrisGoldn Posts: 473 Member
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    thanks for the tips. i will contuine with 1800 netting around 1600 and keep up my newly found love of HIIT. i dont want to eat any less because i want to maintain my muscle

    As long as you maintain atleast 1g of protein per LBM you (shouldnt) lose any muscle


    Good Luck...
  • pg1girl
    pg1girl Posts: 268 Member
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    i am 25yrs old, mother of two (5 and 6). i am 5'7 and as of today weigh 148.8lbs. after being here for a while i decided i didnt want to just be skinny i wanted muscles. i went for a bulk/cut cycle. BIG MISTAKE!!! i bulked for 4months gaining 15lbs and 12 total inches. i bulked on 2400cals lifting heavy full body 3x a week/cardio 3x a week. then i started cutting. i dropped down to 2000cals and contuined my workouts. i wasnt losing so i dropped down to 1900 cals. still hardly a thing happened. i went on vacation to costa rica. april 9th for 10days. (weighed about 147) and couldnt work out (did alot of activities and walking though) and i piged out(no computer or phone= no logging) it was well worth it and i had a blast. got back home lowered my cals to about 1500 for a week to help make up for eating so much, then settled at 1800 cals. still doing my exericse routine. for almost two weeks now i have altered my diet by cutting out bread(i ate at least 2x a day) and replacing it with more complex carbs such as brown rice and oats. i started monitering my sugar ( i was ALWAYS over) and make sure i stay under 35grams a day. i aim for 180-200 grams of protein sometimes i even get in more. all i drink is water and my diet has been well under control since i got back. I am now back up to 148.8lbs and have only lost 2inches from my waist(at my bellybutton). What am i doing wrong???!!!!!

    I have tried eating more, eating less, eating more protien, eating more clean, giving up foods, lifting more, running more, intervals, and still nothing. i have heard to get the toned, muscular look i want (goal is my profile pic) that i need to eat very low carb. i tried this for a day and i was hungry and super super super tired all day. i have seen others on here doing what i do and eating 12 pieces of bread a day and look like i want to......i just dont get what i am doing wrong and why nothing works for me. before i started on this sitei weighed 130lbs and ate whatever, whenever i wanted.

    For a accurate answer, tell us what your workout routine is. What is your calorie deficit?

    You want to be slim and toned. The "dream body" that it seems every woman wants.

    Here is my best advice...

    NO MORE HEAVY WEIGHTS!!!! Woman don't look good bulky in my opinion... Thats exactly whats going to happen if you keep lifting heavy and eating more than your burning. I would suggest circuit training and plyometics for your exercises. No weights needed, just do a google search on different body weight exercises.

    Or just do p90x or insanity, when you do it, commit to it don't cheat yourself don't half *kitten* it... Just do it and get it out of the way. Once you mastered p90x pick up a different routine like the 300 workout...

    Most important part is diet... Just watch your calories... I wouldn't go over 1400 if I were you. Take a dietary supplement to help with the food cravings, water also helps.


    Heavy weights won't make you bulky unless you're doing hours in the gym. Women don't get truly "bulky" w/o taking supplements/drugs to make it happen. But, heavy weights aren't needed to get "cut" either. So it really depends on what you are comfortable lifting. As for your diet, you definitely need to drop the calories if you want to drop weight, and where your calories come from DOES count. Protein builds muscle. Carbs & fat build fat. Carbs also help you retain water. If you're not feeling well when you drop the carbs, you're probably just doing it too quickly. Try cutting back a little each day.

    Looking through all the comments here, it doesn't seem like you've gotten a whole lot of truly supportive responses. I would hate to see you walk away from what can be a great system because of that. Friend me if you like. I've been studying this quite a bit, and currently have pretty much the same goals you do. I'd be happy to help, or just lend support.

    Oh is that so? So explain to me why Body Builders are in the gym for 30-45min a day 4 days a week? You don't need a lot of time to get bulky... Just break your muscle down, let it build back up...

    Holy someone needs to do some research. You are way way out to lunch with your information buddy.
  • becky3277
    becky3277 Posts: 64 Member
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    Not sure if this is you...but I think a lot of us women can fall under this. Please read this article....it could explain a lot!!

    http://www.shapefit.com/overtraining-exercising-too-much.html

    Great article!!! Very well written.