The most annoying 'compliment'?

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Replies

  • kdeaux1959
    kdeaux1959 Posts: 2,675 Member
    I've had the "wasting away" comment already... Probably because of who it was and how it was said, it really did not bother me. I have had the "You don't need to lose any more weight" comment before when I was still clearly over 250 lbs and was well within the obesity-1 range... Peoples concept of "healthy weight" is askew. Incidentally, since then, that particular gentleman has lost weight himself to a more healthy weight... I guess he "saw the light"... Perhaps one of the more annoying comments came from a medical doctor I used to work with as I was once approaching my healthy weight range who said "you don't have cancer do you?"...LOL> Of course he smoked like a chimney... Lord rest his soul...

    Honestly, I don't try to let those comments bother me too much; many people are very uneducated when it comes to a concept of what a healthy weight really is... I will admit, I used to have an unhealthy idea of it myself as I thought of BMI as law... I now look more at the body fat percentage as a factor ... as long as the bmi is not above 28 or so... Many athletes have BMIs in excess of 30 but it is lean muscle mass... (of course, that is NOT my problem)..
  • SandyAnnP
    SandyAnnP Posts: 252 Member
    What about- " You are looking well" _ didn't know I looked sick before....... :(
  • sophiegrace543
    sophiegrace543 Posts: 143 Member
    "Yeah but you have such a nice personality"
    That doesn't mean that I don't want to look nice!

    My friend once said "You're so pretty that if you lost weight, you'd be perfect" Uh, thanks?! I wasn't sure how to take that one!
  • chrisjuricich
    chrisjuricich Posts: 3
    I've so far only gotten positive comments, but I'm enough of a smartass that if someone gives me a passive aggressive 'compliment' I'll have to figure out some snappy comeback. Hmm...

    "You've gotten skinny!"
    "Do you think so? Do you think I should put some pounds BACK ON?"

    "You've lost weight."
    "Yeah, it's been a problem for me since I started eating more healthfully. Not to mention more women noticing me--that's been a problem for my wife, let me tell you."

    "Boy, you're wasting away!"
    "Piss off, you bloated fatboy."
  • Ohmydaze
    Ohmydaze Posts: 403 Member
    I'm one of those people that always tries to take a compliment gracefully ( and I nag my poor friends to do the same :P )

    Some of these do seem quite rude though, but if they weren't intended to be rude, then the person likely meant well. Commenting on weight loss is always a tricky topic. If they did mean to be nasty, they're almost certainly jealous, because you're on your way to looking amazing, while they do nothing.

    Peace and love :)
  • GabrielleZelda
    GabrielleZelda Posts: 190 Member
    I HATE when people comment on your weight loss and say " You look so much BETTER". Like there was something heinously wrong with you before haha.
  • Wonderob
    Wonderob Posts: 1,372 Member
    That along with, you're so skinny! You don't need to lose any more weight. Yes, I do. I haven't even reached my healthy BMI yet. And any compliment which is followed by their excuses as to why they cannot eat healthy or exercise.

    I think we're going to need another thread called 'acceptable compliments' as I'm always telling my wife that she looks fabulous and doesn't need to lose weight.. Seems I'm being annoying!
  • Phoenix59
    Phoenix59 Posts: 364 Member
    I'm one of those people that always tries to take a compliment gracefully ( and I nag my poor friends to do the same :P )

    Some of these do seem quite rude though, but if they weren't intended to be rude, then the person likely meant well. Commenting on weight loss is always a tricky topic. If they did mean to be nasty, they're almost certainly jealous, because you're on your way to looking amazing, while they do nothing.

    Peace and love :)

    I really do try to see the intention of the "compliment" giver, but I still trying to figure out in what world being told I look like a 12 y/o boy is complimentary. :ohwell:
  • monty619
    monty619 Posts: 1,308 Member
    I just wondered if anybody else had some really annoying 'compliments' that they get from people after some weight loss.

    My favourite is 'you're wasting away!' - no. I'm clearly not, am I? I don't know why, but this one really annoys me.

    lol i only say that to girls who do too much cardio and not enough strength training or eating and are already skinny as hell... its kind of the truth tho.
  • SarahE1092
    SarahE1092 Posts: 83
    The other day I got a " You look amazing...... not that you didn't look amazing before, but you look so good!"
    Not really annoyed, just awkward when someone doesn't know what to say to someone who has lost weight....
  • blonde71
    blonde71 Posts: 955 Member
    I've gotten "you're so skinny!" which irks me. Also, once they find out my age and that I've had kids, they say, "oh, you look good for being a mom and for being (insert age)..." Um, thanks??:angry:
  • Tuzzies
    Tuzzies Posts: 3
    Good topic, I have a few of these. . . When I lost a bunch of weight before it drove me nuts when people would tell me I lost weight, not compliment me or ask if I have they would just say "hey you've lost weight" like it happened behind my back when I wasn't looking, I never know what to say back. Also when people start telling you where they can see it and analysing your body like, "hey you've lost weight haven't you, you can really see it in your face," etc. These are usually the same people who chow down fried noodles for lunch and like to tell me what the best diet plans are. The absolute worst, and I know it is meant to be nice, but when someone says "hey you've lost weight, you look good," like I just looked awful before. That one always makes me chuckle.

    THANK YOU! Whenever I lose weight I start getting mad when I get all these compliments because, what? Did I look hideous before? You bunch of jerks...
  • lynnetted43
    lynnetted43 Posts: 252
    wow you have great abs... have you ever thought about surgury to remove ALL toses stretch marks.? r u kidding me.... for gaining 124lbs with my second baby they are my badges of honor!!!
  • Lukazetta
    Lukazetta Posts: 427 Member
    U must use steroids.
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member
    "You look great, for having a baby."

    How about just, "you look great" without any conditions attached? I don't want to look great "for having a baby" I just want to look great--period!
  • kiminikimkim
    kiminikimkim Posts: 746 Member
    It's a tough one.

    I had a friend who complained that no one noticed that she lost 50lbs. The compliments I gave her:
    "Wow, you lost a lot of weight, you look good!"

    are apparently insults in disguise to many people in this thread. :indifferent:

    Despite what people say in this thread, I think I will continue giving encouragement and compliments to those whose hard work has paid off for them. I think there are more positive people than negative complainers on MFP and I will take my chances. :smile:
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member
    Also, once they find out my age and that I've had kids, they say, "oh, you look good for being a mom and for being (insert age)..." Um, thanks??:angry:

    UGH yes! I hate that! Why can't they just leave it at "You look good"??
  • mazecraze30
    mazecraze30 Posts: 30
    "You don't need a diet."
  • elekelk
    elekelk Posts: 107
    "You look great but don't lose any more weight, you don't want to become anorectic or anything" Why do people always say that? Are they jealous or something? I'm going to be a normal weight soon (2kgs left) so its not like I'm wasting away, haha :P
  • blonde71
    blonde71 Posts: 955 Member
    duplicate post.
  • rwindover
    rwindover Posts: 20
    That along with, you're so skinny! You don't need to lose any more weight. Yes, I do. I haven't even reached my healthy BMI yet. And any compliment which is followed by their excuses as to why they cannot eat healthy or exercise.


    This comment really gets under my skin and really makes me feel guilty for feeling really great about what I have accomplished. I may be oversensitive, but this feels like a backhanded compliment and leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

    Keep up the good work!!!!
  • blonde71
    blonde71 Posts: 955 Member
    Also, once they find out my age and that I've had kids, they say, "oh, you look good for being a mom and for being (insert age)..." Um, thanks??:angry:

    UGH yes! I hate that! Why can't they just leave it at "You look good"??

    Yeah - makes me wonder what the heck they would say if I were younger and childless. Hmmm....:tongue:
  • Fit_Forever25
    Fit_Forever25 Posts: 313 Member
    " you are now size 0" -> really annoying coz I am not even close to that

    "You look like African malnutrition kids " -> pisses me off O.o
  • Lady_Bane
    Lady_Bane Posts: 720 Member
    When people see my wedding photos or my drivers license: "You were so pretty"...
    I love the unintended past tense.
  • vettle
    vettle Posts: 621 Member
    When we went out for dinner with work once (this is long after I reached my goal) and I got up to go to the washroom before our meals came and one of my co-workers said "oh she's going for a quick run to burn off calories before dinner!". Like I'm some eating disorder riddled person.

    A compliment that I am in shape and take care of myself, but it felt like a shot.
  • CoffeeNBooze
    CoffeeNBooze Posts: 966 Member
    Yes, telling someone they have lost weight is not necessarily a compliment unless you know they have been working to lose some weight in a healthy way. If you don't know, then I wouldn't say "oh youve lost weight, you look great!" They might be sick, you don't know. I think the best way to compliment someone is to say maybe.... "have you been working out? you look good" or you know, something along that line. Or a simple, "you look great"!
  • Susabelle64
    Susabelle64 Posts: 207 Member
    Well you may be fat but your face ain't too lined, but then wrinkles don't show on a balloon do they?? I was speechless!!

    OMG are you freaking kidding me? No court of law in the south would have convicted you, this person qualifies for the "because he needed killin'" defense!!
  • lilcupcake213
    lilcupcake213 Posts: 545 Member
    mine was "you dont look too bad considering youve had a child..."

    THIS !! I get that all the time .. "wow, you look good for having 3 kids" ...or "you look good for a mom". How about just .."you look great" ?
  • CoffeeNBooze
    CoffeeNBooze Posts: 966 Member
    When we went out for dinner with work once (this is long after I reached my goal) and I got up to go to the washroom before our meals came and one of my co-workers said "oh she's going for a quick run to burn off calories before dinner!". Like I'm some eating disorder riddled person.

    A compliment that I am in shape and take care of myself, but it felt like a shot.

    That's terrible, how insensitive!!! haters, haha
  • SandysNewLife
    SandysNewLife Posts: 87 Member
    From a friend of mine

    You are looking better ! How much have you lost ? How much did you weigh before? Are you a size 12 yet ? (no, I sure am not) tell me when you are a size 12 cuz that is my size. Whats your goal ? When will you get there ? You can still eat cake cant you ???
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