8 Myths about Self-Defense Training

Excellent post. I practiced karate in a competition school for many years, and while it was fun, I eventually realized that training for competition wasn't the best way to prepare for a real life situation. Sure, we learned self-defense, but we also learned point sparring, which in some ways contradicted effective self defense.

Now I have been studying at a traditional kung fu school for years. I feel like I know a lot more, but mostly I know to be aware and try to avoid a physical conflict at all costs. People may think they know how to kick and punch, but it's also important to practice it in a combat situation, and learn what it feels like to BE kicked and punched. No way someone can learn the proper mindset from a workout video.

Thank you for sharing this info. My kickboxing teacher (karate) also teaches the COBRA self defense system, he incorporates some things into the regular class, but always says the goal is to get away, not deliver an *kitten* kicking.

This.

By the time I was 16, I had a few years of karate under my belt, but that wasn't what prevented me from being attacked.

I had been chatting to a drunk guy on the platform, waiting to get on the last train home from Brighton. Small talk to pass the time. The last train is always (or used to be) full of partygoers curtailing their evening to catch the train home at midnight. It was always full of people, and there was a good hippie vibe, which is pretty typical of Brighton's live-and-let-live nature.

I left to catch my train, and this guy got on the same one, so we sat together and continued chatting. Out of the blue, he leaned in to me, placed his hand between my legs, and asked me if I'd like to have sex with him.

I removed his hand, and said in no uncertain terms, that I did not. Furthermore, that I thought there may have been a misunderstanding, and that I was not interested. He was drunk, I was sober, we were chatting, sometimes people get the wrong end of the stick. I said that he was absolutely not to do it again, and if he did I would move. I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I can see how the misunderstanding happened.

Five minutes of chatting, and he does the exact same thing again. Without a word, I pick up my things, get up and walk through 4 carriages before looking to find a new spot to sit. As I turn in the middle of the carriage, looking around me for a seat, I see him as subtly as possible slip into a seat behind me. The man had followed me, and then tried to hide.

You don't need to be a rocket scientist to come to the conclusion that this just got weird, and very concerning.

I can only think of one reason why you would try to follow a young girl, after she has told you in no uncertain terms she doesn't want to have sex with you, and then try and hide close to her.

I knew he was getting off at the same stop as me, and I would be walking home alone. No taxis at this time, and no one at home to call to pick me up.

He was bigger than me. Push come to shove, I probably couldn't take him. He was drunk and predatory so I couldn't reason with him. But I was surrounded by people. So I did the only thing I could think of, which was to stare him down, and say as loudly and as calmly as I could, whilst pointing at him:

"I don't know you. I told you I didn't want to have sex with you, and now you have followed me through 4 carriages. I want you to leave me alone. I don't know you. You put your hand between my legs, I left the carriage, and you have followed me here. I do not know you."

For those outside the UK, train carriages are quiet, even when full of partygoers, so when I started speaking you could hear a pin drop, and the man visibly squirmed.

Within seconds, a group of about eight lads nearest to me asked me if this man was bothering me, and I said he very much was. They surrounded me like my very own group of bodyguards, and escorted me off the train when it came to my stop.

I can not put into words how grateful I still am to that group of gents.

Thank you for sharing this info. My kickboxing teacher (karate) also teaches the COBRA self defense system, he incorporates some things into the regular class, but always says the goal is to get away, not deliver an *kitten* kicking.

This.

By the time I was 16, I had a few years of karate under my belt, but that wasn't what prevented me from being attacked.

I had been chatting to a drunk guy on the platform, waiting to get on the last train home from Brighton. Small talk to pass the time. The last train is always (or used to be) full of partygoers curtailing their evening to catch the train home at midnight. It was always full of people, and there was a good hippie vibe, which is pretty typical of Brighton's live-and-let-live nature.

I left to catch my train, and this guy got on the same one, so we sat together and continued chatting. Out of the blue, he leaned in to me, placed his hand between my legs, and asked me if I'd like to have sex with him.

I removed his hand, and said in no uncertain terms, that I did not. Furthermore, that I thought there may have been a misunderstanding, and that I was not interested. He was drunk, I was sober, we were chatting, sometimes people get the wrong end of the stick. I said that he was absolutely not to do it again, and if he did I would move. I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I can see how the misunderstanding happened.

Five minutes of chatting, and he does the exact same thing again. Without a word, I pick up my things, get up and walk through 4 carriages before looking to find a new spot to sit. As I turn in the middle of the carriage, looking around me for a seat, I see him as subtly as possible slip into a seat behind me. The man had followed me, and then tried to hide.

You don't need to be a rocket scientist to come to the conclusion that this just got weird, and very concerning.

I can only think of one reason why you would try to follow a young girl, after she has told you in no uncertain terms she doesn't want to have sex with you, and then try and hide close to her.

I knew he was getting off at the same stop as me, and I would be walking home alone. No taxis at this time, and no one at home to call to pick me up.

He was bigger than me. Push come to shove, I probably couldn't take him. He was drunk and predatory so I couldn't reason with him. But I was surrounded by people. So I did the only thing I could think of, which was to stare him down, and say as loudly and as calmly as I could, whilst pointing at him:

"I don't know you. I told you I didn't want to have sex with you, and now you have followed me through 4 carriages. I want you to leave me alone. I don't know you. You put your hand between my legs, I left the carriage, and you have followed me here. I do not know you."

For those outside the UK, train carriages are quiet, even when full of partygoers, so when I started speaking you could hear a pin drop, and the man visibly squirmed.

Within seconds, a group of about eight lads nearest to me asked me if this man was bothering me, and I said he very much was. They surrounded me like my very own group of bodyguards, and escorted me off the train when it came to my stop.

I can not put into words how grateful I still am to that group of gents.

Wow, that would be so scary! Im so glad you ended up ok!

I did Ju Jitsu for 9 years, I achieved a Black Belt 2nd Dan and loved every minute of it! It keeps you fit, you meet brill people and learn how to defend yourself.

Jiu Jitsu is good. The whole "rolling around on the ground with another sweaty dude" isn't really my bag, but still.

I wouldnt say its about rolling around on the ground, well what I did certainly wasnt.. unfortunately!

There's a lot of rolling around with dudes.

I was a boxer, and when I fought my first MMA trained guy, he twisted me up nicely.
SOLD!
MMA is KING!

I'm taking a self-defense class next semester, like some of the other posters on this thread. I run alone and feel that it would really help me feel more secure and safe. Also, I'm working towards being a social worker, and one never knows what position they might find themselves in for that profession. Especially if my job requires home visits.

Thank you for sharing this info. My kickboxing teacher (karate) also teaches the COBRA self defense system, he incorporates some things into the regular class, but always says the goal is to get away, not deliver an *kitten* kicking.

This.

By the time I was 16, I had a few years of karate under my belt, but that wasn't what prevented me from being attacked.

I had been chatting to a drunk guy on the platform, waiting to get on the last train home from Brighton. Small talk to pass the time. The last train is always (or used to be) full of partygoers curtailing their evening to catch the train home at midnight. It was always full of people, and there was a good hippie vibe, which is pretty typical of Brighton's live-and-let-live nature.

I left to catch my train, and this guy got on the same one, so we sat together and continued chatting. Out of the blue, he leaned in to me, placed his hand between my legs, and asked me if I'd like to have sex with him.

I removed his hand, and said in no uncertain terms, that I did not. Furthermore, that I thought there may have been a misunderstanding, and that I was not interested. He was drunk, I was sober, we were chatting, sometimes people get the wrong end of the stick. I said that he was absolutely not to do it again, and if he did I would move. I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I can see how the misunderstanding happened.

Five minutes of chatting, and he does the exact same thing again. Without a word, I pick up my things, get up and walk through 4 carriages before looking to find a new spot to sit. As I turn in the middle of the carriage, looking around me for a seat, I see him as subtly as possible slip into a seat behind me. The man had followed me, and then tried to hide.

You don't need to be a rocket scientist to come to the conclusion that this just got weird, and very concerning.

I can only think of one reason why you would try to follow a young girl, after she has told you in no uncertain terms she doesn't want to have sex with you, and then try and hide close to her.

I knew he was getting off at the same stop as me, and I would be walking home alone. No taxis at this time, and no one at home to call to pick me up.

He was bigger than me. Push come to shove, I probably couldn't take him. He was drunk and predatory so I couldn't reason with him. But I was surrounded by people. So I did the only thing I could think of, which was to stare him down, and say as loudly and as calmly as I could, whilst pointing at him:

"I don't know you. I told you I didn't want to have sex with you, and now you have followed me through 4 carriages. I want you to leave me alone. I don't know you. You put your hand between my legs, I left the carriage, and you have followed me here. I do not know you."

For those outside the UK, train carriages are quiet, even when full of partygoers, so when I started speaking you could hear a pin drop, and the man visibly squirmed.

Within seconds, a group of about eight lads nearest to me asked me if this man was bothering me, and I said he very much was. They surrounded me like my very own group of bodyguards, and escorted me off the train when it came to my stop.

I can not put into words how grateful I still am to that group of gents.

Dude!!! Scary story!

Good work though, bet he shat himself!

I did Ju Jitsu for 9 years, I achieved a Black Belt 2nd Dan and loved every minute of it! It keeps you fit, you meet brill people and learn how to defend yourself.

Jiu Jitsu is good. The whole "rolling around on the ground with another sweaty dude" isn't really my bag, but still.

I wouldnt say its about rolling around on the ground, well what I did certainly wasnt.. unfortunately!

There's a lot of rolling around with dudes.

Where did you go to do it? I feel I missed out on this for 9 years!

You are absolutely correct that Tae Bo and such aren't self-defense and I'm glad to see someone else say so. Being in the martial arts, I disagree with some of the other stuff you say BUT that's my opinion vs yours so it doesn't really matter, I'm just glad overall to see that someone else thinks like I do. :-)

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I am:
- A 24-year practicing martial artist' with Blackbelts or BBE's in Tae Kwon, Judo, Jiu Jitsu & Krav Maga
- A certified combatives and firearms instructor for the Department of Defense, Law Enforcement and Private Security Firms
- A certified Rape Aggression Defense instructor
- An attorney
[/quote]
Wow!! I'm so very impressed and....well, I'll just leave it at that. I took a very short "self-defense" class through work & the most I got out of it was that girls with long hair are more easily attacked because of their long hair (easier to grab from behind...no jokes necessary). I think I'm supposed to get more out of it than that...it was free though :ohwell:

I started learning martial arts from a ex-vietnam green beret when I was about 16. He didn't teach forms just basic self-defense tactics. The first thing he taught me was - if you are attacked by someone who has a weapon, if they want your money, give it to them. If they want to hurt you, assume you will be hurt, then your goal should be to try to take the least amount of damage and inflict the most. Once you managed to stop them even if for just a second - run like hell and scream as loud as possible.

I have been attacked about 4 times in my life with weapons and without, and luckily only have gotten a few scraps.

Since my first lessons I went on to dabble in many different fighting styles - Isshinryu karate, Akido, Wing Chung, Tai Chi (Old Yang Style), Tae Kwon Do. I also studied some weapons forms - Phillipino Stick Fighting, Western Saber, Tai Chi Sword, Staff and Kendo. I was forced to stop actively practicing after about 26 years due to advancing age and injuries, but I still love to watch and I practice a few specific moves -mostly blocks and eye and throat strikes and weapons (cane). The last tournament I competed in was at the senior black belt level and I even won a trophy. Something I observed/learned at tournaments was - what ever moves that a style 'outlaws' in competition were moves I wanted to learn. For example Tai Chi and Wing Chung make use of eye strikes but these are 'outlawed' in Karate and Tae Kwon Do tournaments. I also learned that focusing on a couple of moves that 'fit' you, and practicing them constantly, is a good approach as you can then perform that move automatically should the need arise.

A lawyer in DC? That's just crazy talk.

Yeah, pretty lonely out here. It's great to be able to use the internet to connect with other people like me...