CHEESY JOKES THREAD
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What's small and screams and can't turn corners?
A baby....with a spear through it.
What's black and white and red and can't fit thru a door?
a nun with a spear thru her head0 -
What's the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?
Snowballs.0 -
What's red, white, and blue and goes 100 miles an hour?
Smurf's in a blender.0 -
How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb?
. . .0 -
End the seat up/seat down debate by using the sink!0
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What do you call a...
Man with no arms or legs in a swimming pool?
Bob
A man with a shovel on his head?
Doug
A woman who can balance a bottle of beer in each hand and a pool cue between her knees?
Beatrix Potter0 -
One more.
Q:What do you get if you cross a donkey leg with an onion?
A: A piece of *kitten* that makes your eyes water0 -
Q: What is brown and rhymes with Snoop?
A: Dr. Dre0 -
what do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?
Eleph-ino! (get it??? He-double hockey sticks if I know?!?!?) cracks me up every time!!!!0 -
how do you make a tissue dance?
...
you put a little boogie in it.
:P0 -
What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
Most kids won't eat broccoli!0 -
why do seagulls live by the sea?
if the lived by the bay they would be bagels!0 -
What special team did the Police put together to combat insects?
The SWAT team!0 -
What do you call a pig that knows Karate?
A pork chop!0 -
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze!0 -
What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic?
About halfway! hehe0 -
Just received this from a friend. enjoy. not really jokes but good anyway.
When a chemist dies, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. However, he says he can stop any
time.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met
herbivore.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity and I just can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
PMS jokes aren't funny ¬ period.
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she
couldn't control her pupils?
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
Broken pencils are pointless.
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. The police
have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Velcro is a rip off!
A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
Venison for dinner again? Oh, deer!
The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.
Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.0 -
Courtesy of my 5 y/o:
Child: Why did the chicken sit on the nest? Adult: i don't know why? Child: Because he didn't have a chair!!!! (followed by hilarious laughing).
:bigsmile:0 -
What do you cal a brunette and three blondes on a street corner? Regular price, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks.
That one is kinda dated...think pizza hut.
lol... i remember that.....0 -
What do you say if you see a blind dinosaur
Doyouthinkhesaurus0
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