Would you be offended...

1235

Replies

  • clairyfairy247
    clairyfairy247 Posts: 425 Member
    I think it's a confidence thing.

    You feel more confident after losing weight and that's what they find attractive!
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    I don't honestly understand this question. In the end, we are all trying to be more attractive ( yeah yeah, I know I'll get the " I want to be healthy responses") and if your SO is more attracted to you after you work your *kitten* off for a slammin bod and YOUR UPSET ABOUT IT?!?! there is something wrong with you.
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
    My wife came out and told me that I was ugly as a fat man.
    HELLO!
    It's just not attractive.
    Accept it.
    And when you lose the weight, don't blame the SO who desires you more now that you've lost the fat.
    What were you expecting?
    Again...HELLO!
  • Emancipated_Tai
    Emancipated_Tai Posts: 751 Member
    Not at all. I know I'm better at it now because of the weight I've lost. I got a few moves I didn't know I had in me :laugh:
  • Rdahl2
    Rdahl2 Posts: 90
    If your significant other was more attracted to you after you lost weight? Like you lost 50 pounds and they couldn't keep their hands off you but before was only got intimate every once in awhile?

    For me no it wouldn't offend me because me being bigger now than i normally am and not really liking the way I look at times, how am I supposed to expect my significant other want me equally if I dont like myself the way I am.
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
    I think it's a confidence thing.

    You feel more confident after losing weight and that's what they find attractive!
    ^^^^^^^^^
    Not THIS!
    No, we find a fit body more attractive than a fat, flabby body.
    Let's not try to make this the Oprah Winfrey show.
  • tammietifanie
    tammietifanie Posts: 1,496 Member
    In short- yes....however I know when I am happy about the way I look, so is he. I also know when I am feeling more confident in the way I look I am also more likely to come onto him. I always here confidence is very attractive...



    ^^^^ This ^^^^^
  • therealangd
    therealangd Posts: 1,861 Member
    Nope. Not offended at all.
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
    I wouldn't be offended. I think it would be awesome. Shows your hard work has paid off.
  • DaBossLady24
    DaBossLady24 Posts: 556 Member
    No, not at all especially if I think I'm more attractive when I'm slimmer lol

    I think that a new sense of confidence comes to those after and during their weight loss, which is what many (no matter the gender) are attracted to. Doesn't matter if you lost 15, 40, or 100 pounds, they're attracted to how you look and how you carry yourself with that new sense of confidence by your side.
  • Jxnsmma
    Jxnsmma Posts: 919 Member
    nope because I am less interested the heavier he gets too...
  • marie_cressman
    marie_cressman Posts: 980 Member
    I go back and forth on this. The fat girl in me would have her feelings hurt. I should be loved no matter what size.

    But lets be honest- when you lose weight you feel better, LOOK better and have more confidence. What is not to love? I know that I would be more attracted to my husband at a fit state rather than an unhealthy state.

    I know my husband LOVES me through thick and thin (pun intended). If he doesn't find me more attractive when I lose more than I will be offended!!!!


    ^^ this.

    I have gone back and forth about this also. My husband married me when I was 270lbs. We just had a talk the other day because I honestly was feeling down and I wanted to give up (I have 23lbs I want to lose and I was feeling tired and like I was done). He told me he would like to see me reach my goal. He was attracted to me and loved me at 270lbs just as he is attracted to me and loves me now at 183lbs, but he would like to see me reach my goal. Initially, it made me upset. I thought "wow... if you are telling me now you want me to lose more weight, what did you think when we first got married??" He didn't intend it to come out that way. He explained that he has noticed I am more confident and more positive now than I was when we first got married and he likes that. He knows I have goals set for myself and he wants to see me reach them. It meant a lot to hear him say that since I wasn't sure for a while how he felt about the weight loss. Sometimes he seems very negative (doesn't like talking about it, gets upset when i say i can't eat or have certain things, etc), but talking to him about everything helped a lot.
  • DonniesGirl69
    DonniesGirl69 Posts: 644 Member
    Not at all....I know I look hella better now at 160 than I did at 250.
    And, as someone else said, men are visual.....it's just how they're built.

    Trust me, there was nothing sexy about me 90 pounds ago, at least in MY eyes. I feel better now and have so much more confidence and that increases the sexy factor exponentially. :)
  • Sharyn913
    Sharyn913 Posts: 777 Member
    I go back and forth on this. The fat girl in me would have her feelings hurt. I should be loved no matter what size.

    But lets be honest- when you lose weight you feel better, LOOK better and have more confidence. What is not to love? I know that I would be more attracted to my husband at a fit state rather than an unhealthy state.

    I know my husband LOVES me through thick and thin (pun intended). If he doesn't find me more attractive when I lose more than I will be offended!!!!

    Pretty much this. My husband tells me all the time that weight and appearance doesn't matter. I could be 120lbs and drop dead gorgeous, but if I was a constant complainer that did nothing but nag and not have cold ice tea ready for him on a hot day, he would chose a 400lb version of me that was happy and positive. Makes sense I guess ;)
  • Stooooo
    Stooooo Posts: 1,191 Member
    Honestly, to me it is a confidence thing. I can tell when my wife is feeling good about herself and that makes her more attractive. It really has nothing to do with weight or pounds lost.
  • VryIrishGirl76
    VryIrishGirl76 Posts: 1,167 Member
    Persnally- no.
    My confidence goes through the roof as I shrink.
  • Erindipitous
    Erindipitous Posts: 1,234 Member
    What if the opposite? What if he lost interest when you got thinner?

    This is the only reason I'd be offended.
  • Berto0391
    Berto0391 Posts: 273 Member
    Seriously, I just want to get laid. Does it matter the why?

    This wins the topic as I'm the same way.
  • spikefoot
    spikefoot Posts: 419
    I would just be happy they found me attractive. I don't mean to sound all cold but you can't expect someone to feel as attracted to a person that has let themselves go (I am right there with you so no offense).

    The same way girls become less attracted to their husbands/boyfriend when they become lazy and watch too much tv.

    A person who takes care of their appearance is more attractive.... male or female we can't fault someone for being human.

    Personality is awesome and a big requirement but I am not going to lie and say that appearance doesn't contribute too.
  • lvpthemvp
    lvpthemvp Posts: 266 Member
    I would not be offended. I would be a ride or die chick. literally. LOL.
  • SouthernSkylark
    SouthernSkylark Posts: 128 Member
    I think a distinction needs to be made between loving and caring for your partner (the emotional level of your relationship) and sexual attraction (the physical level of your relationship). A person can love and care for you, emotionally commit to you fully and completely, and dedicate time everyday to making you feel happy and accepted and generally enjoy spending time with you.

    But that doesn't mean that you necessarily push their sexy time buttons. You shouldn't feel put of if, upon dropping a ton of pounds and generally becoming a more fit person, Your partner is more turned on by you. And Likely, You'll feel more turned on because you'll feel more confident in yourself and, lets face it, you'll be in better shape for better sex.

    My two cents (and the only opinion from a guy in this thread, apparently.)

    ^^^THIS^^^ is the best comment here.

    I totally agree!
  • bsix3
    bsix3 Posts: 291
    when you feel better about yourself the confidence shines through like a light. so chances are it's not the weight loss that has him gaga over you, it's the confidence in yourself that makes you irresistable to him. :-)
  • SithZombie
    SithZombie Posts: 165 Member
    I don't think I would be (key word there being think); My husband and I are both trying to lose weight and get in shape together. I know he likes smaller women, just like I enjoy looking at fit men, so I don't think it'll upset me too much if my husband enjoys having a trim wife once I get this weight off....because I know (And this is super shallow, but I'm not going to lie about it) I'll enjoy his body more once the fat starts coming off.
  • sarahharmintx
    sarahharmintx Posts: 868 Member
    What if the opposite? What if he lost interest when you got thinner?
    This is my fear.
  • 3ofmine
    3ofmine Posts: 136 Member
    I think a distinction needs to be made between loving and caring for your partner (the emotional level of your relationship) and sexual attraction (the physical level of your relationship). A person can love and care for you, emotionally commit to you fully and completely, and dedicate time everyday to making you feel happy and accepted and generally enjoy spending time with you.

    But that doesn't mean that you necessarily push their sexy time buttons. You shouldn't feel put of if, upon dropping a ton of pounds and generally becoming a more fit person, Your partner is more turned on by you. And Likely, You'll feel more turned on because you'll feel more confident in yourself and, lets face it, you'll be in better shape for better sex.

    My two cents (and the only opinion from a guy in this thread, apparently.)

    ^^ This is TOTALLY, COMPLETELY TRUE! I worry that my husband won't be as attracted to me when I lose weight. He doesn't have a problem with me now but I KNOW he would be more attracted when I lose more weight. I know that he loves me and that is what matters. He's been supportive, caring, loving and we have a great sexual relationship now BUT quite honestly if he wasn't as attracted to me when I get smaller it would be shocking because *I* don't like looking at myself without clothes. Anyway I know that him being more attracted to me doesn't mean he loves me less. I KNOW he loves me and that has nothing to do with what I look like!

    Angel
  • mikeyboy
    mikeyboy Posts: 1,057 Member
    No. Men are visual. The better the view, the more aroused they are. It's biology.

    Right on the money. A man would not love you any more or less, but he would be more aroused.
  • fitpilatesqueen
    fitpilatesqueen Posts: 337
    No I wouldn´t be offended.
    I´m not happy or feel attractive with the way I look then why should someone else be?
    It would probable encourage me to keep on and do even better.
  • StarIsMoving
    StarIsMoving Posts: 437
    I think a distinction needs to be made between loving and caring for your partner (the emotional level of your relationship) and sexual attraction (the physical level of your relationship). A person can love and care for you, emotionally commit to you fully and completely, and dedicate time everyday to making you feel happy and accepted and generally enjoy spending time with you.

    But that doesn't mean that you necessarily push their sexy time buttons. You shouldn't feel put of if, upon dropping a ton of pounds and generally becoming a more fit person, Your partner is more turned on by you. And Likely, You'll feel more turned on because you'll feel more confident in yourself and, lets face it, you'll be in better shape for better sex.

    My two cents (and the only opinion from a guy in this thread, apparently.)

    Totally This ^^^^ I would have used my own words, but this was perfectly stated already
  • grabbin_life84
    grabbin_life84 Posts: 36 Member
    Nope. When I got married I was 126 and 5'6. We recently had a baby where I gained a whooping 51 lbs! I wasn't happy with the way I looked so why should I expect my husband to be? He never made me feel lesser but he wanted me to me happy, confident and feeling sexy. So he's been there with me encouraging a healthy way of loosing the weight. I feel more loved through this then if he were lying to me, saying he was attracted when he wasn't, just to save my feelings.
  • driaxx
    driaxx Posts: 314 Member
    Yeah...I don't know why it offends me but it does. Maybe because I feel he wouldn't love me as much if I put on weight, which disgusts me.

    He showed me a picture of Miranda Kerr, and I said "I think she's absolutely gorgeous" and he said "yeah but you're hotter because she's heavier than you". MIRANDA KERR of all people. So if I were to have the body of a supermodel that would STILL be too heavy for him to find attractive.

    I don't know why I got so offended but I did...
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