Called fat by a stranger.

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Replies

  • People can be so cruel. No one has ever called me fat to my face but I have been asked many times if I was pregnant, which always makes my heart sink.
  • edithejaime
    edithejaime Posts: 23 Member
    Sorry to hear that ! i had something happen to me today ..i have me walking / running @ this trail near my house for 4 months every mrng there is a women that joins me..today i showed her a pic of when i was over 300 pounds and u knw what she said ! wow u havent changed a bit..if anything u look heavier now !! Wtf r u serious i have lost 131 pounds..i cried but i wiped away my tears and added an extra 30 mins to my workout some ppl are cruel and dnt knw how we struggle day to day !
  • MarisaMoments
    MarisaMoments Posts: 2 Member
    That sucks!

    It's not all kids... Just bad a** kids that need an attitude adjustment. I don't blame you for cussing them out... I would have probably done the same thing! Just don't let it get to you. F**k em... They're kids and mean nothing to you.

    Keep up the great work! :-)
  • T34418l3angel
    T34418l3angel Posts: 474 Member
    OMG! your husband said that? Teach him a lesson, lose the weight and text his friend and tell him your losing the most weight of all, your hubby!
    Lol! I wanted to but since this was seriously the first ( and better be the last!) Bad thing he's eversaid or done I made him feel guilty about it for a week then forgave him. But it still hurts and I'm so self conscious around him now. I think it hurts the most because it was someone I love and expect never too speak a bad word about me especially about my flaws.
  • ishtar13
    ishtar13 Posts: 528 Member
    Read this post and watch the video. ..

    It's one woman's fabulous response to people telling her online that she's fat.

    http://skinnyemmie.com/2012/07/i-am-fat/
  • kathrine90
    kathrine90 Posts: 89 Member
    I have been called fat,fattie and obese a million and one times.
    The other day i was crossing my road on the zebra crossing and some guys in there early 20's shouted hurry up you fat b****
    I thought people dont have any manners these days just throwing all these swear words out there.
    So what if im Fat is it any of your business. I just carrying on crossing the road laughing. They looked confused as they drove off.
    I dont react because normally they just want a reaction well where i live anyways. I used to get into arguements but now i just laugh at them. Or say Do you need to state the obvious ?? or Dont you think i already know that ??
    I got so depressed about it at one point whenever i went out i would listen to my ipod so then i couldnt hear even if anyone was saying stuff about me. Dont bother listening to what other people say if your out in the park walking exercising just do your thing.

    Sorry for the ramble people.
    .
  • puddies01
    puddies01 Posts: 17
    Yes at a party when I was 19 or so. I was talking to friends and I had my back facing these two guys. One said "She's cute, Don't you think?" And the other guy said "No. She's fat." I left the party crying that night. People can be very cruel at times!
  • mcsteenie
    mcsteenie Posts: 31
    First of all, you are not flawed because these idiots called you fat. YOU ARE FINE. There is nothing wrong with you.

    I can't tell you exactly how many times I have been called fat. BUT I sure as *bleep* remember most of them though.

    When I was ten at a county fair someone (adult man) asked me when I was due and how sad it was that I was so young to be pregnant. In grade school the guys who snapped my bra strap in 4th grade were the same ones calling me a fat @ss or similar insults on the bus and at recess.

    Or they guy on the bus that pretended to ask me out in Jr High ( I ignored him) only to turn around and laugh at the "fattie" who thought she was too good for him. Sad thing was I had liked him up until that point.

    As an adult I've had people snicker at me at a work party because my outfit "showed her rolls" and I, too, have had the homeless person call me a fat b**ch for not giving him any money.

    I can't tell you that ignoring them works. I can't tell you confronting them leaves you feeling better. (I've done both). What I can tell you is that you are not alone in feeling awful and almost betrayed when strangers do this. I agree children (and adults alike) can be monstrous. I have a little one now and one of my worst fears is the first time someone does this to her. Or the first time she says something inappropriate about someone else in public. I know from family and friends, it will happen, but it’s how you react as a parent and correct them that ultimately make an impression.

    It is funny, in a way, that one of the first weapons a stranger will use on another is the "fattie," "moron", or sl*t" card. It’s as if attacking another like this somehow trivialized the attacker's own inadequacies.

    We all know with our intellectual self that these people are complete wastes of space and no credence should be given to the inane words they utter. But deep in our hearts it still hurts for someone, *who does NOT know you*, to call you something so horrid.

    I am sorry this happened to you. But know, IT IS NOT YOU. You are not alone, as you have already seen by the other MFP response comments on this thread. As you can see, there are people who don't know you, who see your worth and know you *are* a person not an insult. My thoughts are with you. Keep your chin up and keep trucking on to your goal. ((hugs))

    And for the person on this thread who intimated that people who get called fat must not be as confident a personality and are therefore somehow asking for this behavior... My only words are, "Wow. How ignorant." Perhaps you did not intend your words to come across that way, but they did.
  • mcsteenie
    mcsteenie Posts: 31
    Sorry to be so verbose. This thread really got under my skin. Thanks for listening.
  • I was called fat by a grown woman in a store....I called her ugly *****!!! Although it hurt me then, I decided to turn my anger to do something positive and started the journery of healthy living. I've lost sixty pounds so far and feel great....nobody calls me fat now!
  • jillian769
    jillian769 Posts: 247 Member
    My kids (boys) would never call a stranger something like that...and if they did I would kill them!!!! LOL:mad:
  • vacherin
    vacherin Posts: 192
    I was once told, "Look at the size of your *kitten*!" by a guy who mistakenly thought I had pushed in front of him in a queue. At the time I was furious but then I thought, I actually feel sorry for him if that's the best he can do. He could have said something about the "pushing-in" or used polite language to talk about manners and suchlike, but the poor guy was clearly so lacking in intelligence that he had to stoop to a comment about my appearance, which had nothing to do with the original reason why he was angry with me. Pathetic. All these people are pathetic. They will never ultimately get anywhere in life or be happy, and that's why I feel sorry for them.
  • Janet9906
    Janet9906 Posts: 546 Member
    I'm so sorry that happen to you, I have never been called fat by a strange, at least I don't think I have, but I had an ex-boyfriend who called me fat all the time, when I was dating him I was 120 pound 5'6", not sure what he would call me these days at 160 pounds.
  • I know it's hard when a stranger calls you fat, but it worst when a person you called "friend" called you fat...It's just like "so this is what you've been thinking of me all this time??"
  • marycmeadows
    marycmeadows Posts: 1,691 Member
    karma's a *****.
  • LoneR113
    LoneR113 Posts: 27
    In my role at work, I quite often come across this. To me, I take it as not personal,more a case of them trying to find a weakness in my character. I tend to find asking them to repeat the abuse when at closer proximity seems to calm the situation - Although to be fair, not always. My other way of dealing with it it to say that I can slim down, but they can do nuthin' about their "boat race".Then I ask them to leave, having to walk home........ M'wahahahahahahaha
  • gjulie
    gjulie Posts: 391
    He was looking for a reaction and you gave it to him,wasnt you personally you happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time,you would have been better off to ignore him.Disrespect from anyone at any age is dispicable and wrong Im a mother of 5 and each of them know that diserspect in any form is zero tolerence,do you not realise swearing back at him probably had him laughing at you for hours,horrible little creep that he is,unfortunately you will always meet ones like this as well as those who arent,rise above it dont let it get to you,you are out there doing well for yourself dont let the likes of this rudeness put you off.
  • benita30
    benita30 Posts: 20
    People are horrible. One time I was walking to work, when a random guy yelled that he'd 'give me a go', if I lost a few kilos -.- .
  • tadpole242
    tadpole242 Posts: 507 Member
    I was cycling home after a long and stressful day( no excuse I know) but as I cycle past a group of teenage girls and their fanboys, they called me fat hippo as in “look at that f***ing fat hippo on that bike”. I stopped and told them, “yes I’m fat but you have an ugly soul. When I’m slim you’ll still have an ugly soul” and Rode on. I still feel bad about that.
  • Hayter2013
    Hayter2013 Posts: 77
    Bit different but my mom came home the once crying (she was about 45 at the time) as some of the young guys in the park (who were in the year above me) were calling her big-head.

    She was born with a large head as a child and had operations etc and was picked on in school over it, so these kids doing this brought it all back for her.

    I didn't even know why she was crying as I had never noticed her head size before as she's my mom and I love her no matter what.
    Children or adults can be cruel, it just depends on their intelligence level or how they've been brought (or should I say dragged up)

    I love being a mom to my boy whos two and it makes me sad to see kids living by us who swear, smoke and are aggressive to innocent passers by who are just miding their own business but I know my boy will not grow up to be like that as its how they have been brought up that way.

    Those kids deserve a slap. Their parents to go to parenting classes. The best thing is to not let it get to you. After all, you have voiced it on here and everyone has your back. You are on here to change your lifestyle and don't give in, at the end of the day, he will still be a cretinous little boy who will end up with an electronic tag or in juvie as his potty mouth has gotten him into trouble!!

    Keep smiling! :smile:
  • PrinnyBomb
    PrinnyBomb Posts: 196 Member
    Yes everytime I go out by myself for the last 15 years. It's really depressing but I expect it, especially from the scum who usually shout at me. But I'm doing something about it now. They broke me but I'm going to fix me so I can tell the whole world to F**k off and take a hike :)

    But yes kids and and teenagers are the worst for it even though I'm not a teenager any more. Screw them :)
  • navydentalchic
    navydentalchic Posts: 234 Member
    Just tell him that you can't fix stupid. I have been called fat so many times to my face that I have lost count. It's gotten to the point when someone calls me fat I just say," really? Is that the best insult you can come up with?! Your parents were brother and sister, weren't they?"

    love this!
  • allyemo1985
    allyemo1985 Posts: 14 Member
    the last time i heard someone say that to me i was at college 17 years old and carrying a kfc meal, some lads went past in a car rolled down the window and shouted your a fat *****, who ate all the pies, i wouldnt mind but i was prob only size 14 it scared me for life. I will always remember the hurt i felt for years after those lads shouted at me. Now im 27 next month ten years has past and I became the bigger person I dont care now about was said i only care about being a good mum to my kids and loosing the weight to have a healthy longer life with them. Dont let them bother you next time walk with a headset on and your head held high.
  • Whiskybelly
    Whiskybelly Posts: 197 Member
    I find that people make those types of comments when in a large group, because they don't think you're going to respond to it.

    As far as I'm concerned; if someone hasn't got the guts to say it to your face, then what they have to say isn't remotely important.
  • marie_cressman
    marie_cressman Posts: 980 Member
    I'm sorry that happened to you (and I mean this toward everyone posting their stories and the OP). I know it sucks. It's happened to me plenty of times as well. I still have anxiety about being made fun of sometimes. It's given me social anxiety especially around other women. I agree with what someone else said about there being too many best friends and very little discipline. Not saying that ALL kids who do crap like that have no discipline at home(because let's face it... some children are just rebellious even if they have a fantastic home life and parents who do discipline at home... you can't control what they do when you aren't around though), but a majority probably don't. My nieces would NEVER say those things to anyone. Why? Because their momma would knock their little *kitten* into next week. LOL My children are only 3 and 6 and hear people saying crap like "you're stupid" and other things. I don't allow them to talk like that to each other or anyone else. My husband and I punish accordingly if we hear it and my only hope is that they don't turn into ignorant jerks as they get older. I think seeing me struggle with my weight will have an impact on them even if they are young. I have never heard my son make fun of anyone for being overweight or being different than he is and I hope I never do... because you better believe he will regret ever letting those words come out of his mouth.
  • brisbaneangie
    brisbaneangie Posts: 12 Member
    I know the feeling, several times when i was younger people yelled out fat comments driving by in cars and I had a hard time at school...

    I might sound a bit crazy, and I know it hurt your feelings, but it was the random acts of meanness that I am the most grateful for. I feel like I am more sensitive to others, because I know how hurtful being insensitive is. I also feel grateful for the kindness in the world and I try to be warm and nice to strangers, because it feels the opposite to how those people made you feel.

    No one is perfect, but aren't you glad that you do not have to worry about being that kind of person? Whatever faults you see in yourself, don't let perfectionism get in the way of YOUR opinion of you. Love yourself, and love those jerks for reminding you that you could be worse off -- you could be some rotten a**hole who puts others down because of personal insecurities.
  • Usbornegal
    Usbornegal Posts: 601 Member
    I can lose weight they'll always be morons

    ^^^ This!
  • lustergirl
    lustergirl Posts: 123 Member
    So, today while I was getting my walk in in the park, these 2 young kids (about 12yrs) were messing around with their bike in the middle of the sidewalk...I didn't think anything of it until I passed them and the one said "fat *****!" Now, I wasn't sure If I heard him right so I ignored him and kept walking. So he yelled it louder. I turned around and said "excuse me, what did you say?" Of course, He couldn't call me a fat ***** to my face because all he could say was "I didn't say nothin' homie" So i kept asking him (using vulgar language) "go on, tell me what the **** you said!" "oh i didn't say nothin homie"...his friend was just kinda standing there not saying anything...If he was not 12 I would have slapped him! I know I shouldn't be using cuss words around children but If he can call me a fat ***** then obviously he can handle the f word and plus i was so pissed words were just coming out of my mouth. I just ended up telling him to **** off...

    Seriously...I can't stand how kids are these days! That really hurts. And obviously I'm walking in the park for a reason...not sitting on my *kitten* eating cake. This is the reason why I don't want to have kids...they're so evil now a days...I never even got called fat in middle/high school (in ear shot at least) things have changed and it's really messed up. I wish his mamma woulda heard that! lol....have any of you ever been called fat to your face by a complete stranger?

    Go ahead and have those babies, just teach them right. You are right though, kids nowadays are terrible because alot of them never learned at home how to be respectful. I am blessed, my sons are pretty good kids and if I heard that coming out out their mouths I would be so heated and smack the shi^(&(&(t out of them. Alot of parents nowadays have failed in the parenting dept.
  • prjoy98
    prjoy98 Posts: 250 Member
    I completely here you there 'lette. It's a struggle for all of us. I can tell you that the problem is not the kids but their parents. Too many "Best Friends" and not enough discipline at home! Just vent to your MFP "Family" We all understand where you're coming from.

    OMG!!! SO true...that's like with the Colorado shooting...WTF where a 4 month old and a 6yr old doing at a midnight showing?!?! It's astounding the irresponsibility/neglect of some parents now. I don't have kids of my own yet but my mother sure didn't raise me the way I see some kids being raised today!!
  • lacewitch
    lacewitch Posts: 766 Member
    some one once sang "i like big but and i an not lie" at me as I cycled past
    now I know the song is complementary and i know i am bottom heavy but this really upset me as it's not what i want to hear when i am bent over cycling ( not the best position anyway) and now i am more selfconscious when i cycle!