People on here need to stick to feedback the user asks for?!?!
Replies
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That's how the kids do it here. Just use the flag system like I do. As a like system.levitateme wrote: »Yes, please flag my totally innocuous posts as abuse.
For example. You got a like!
Hot damn! You beat me to it!0 -
[quote=
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So basically, you want people to do all the work for you and lie to you?
Until the terms of service state that you may not have an opinion, there really is no reason for these threads. I am not mean because I will tell you what is actually required to lose weight. Eat less, move more. Do it every day for a long time. It's not easy, but it's simple.
You don't need a grocery list, literally any food that fits your calories works. You can't "tone up" fast, you can lose fat through a calorie deficit and when the fat drops off you will be "toned" underneath. It takes me about 45 seconds to make my shake in the morning (protein powder, water, ice, instant coffee).
Honestly what I'm tired of on MFP are threads with people arguing about off-topic BS. Like "hey guys how do I paleo?" turns into 2 people arguing about how bad planet fitness is. [/quote]
BUT, the question wasn't directed at soliciting opinions on what is required to lose weight OR how long it takes to make YOUR shakes in the morning. It is his post and he can ask whatever he wants, really. Do you think your answer could be, "I don't know of a shake like that, but it takes me 45 seconds to make my shake with protein powder, water, ice, instant coffee". He would have gotten the same information without the "you are lazy" undertone.0 -
levitateme wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »levitateme wrote: »Here are a few example of what I mean from my posts:
*I asked for a book with grocery lists and meal planner.
Reply: There's nothing you can't eat, you just need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight.
*Asked about a quick workout routine to tone up fast.
Reply: Buy a time machine. Should have started months ago.
*Asked about diseases that can cause weight gain.
Reply: You're looking for the easy way out.
*Asked for pre-made breakfast shake ideas (not something I had to make myself)
Reply: Couple thoughts. First, don't have time or don't want to make time?
These aren't the really mean ones calling me lazy and worthless. Jeez.
Not that bad but stay negative and on topic please!!!
So basically, you want people to do all the work for you and lie to you?
Until the terms of service state that you may not have an opinion, there really is no reason for these threads. I am not mean because I will tell you what is actually required to lose weight. Eat less, move more. Do it every day for a long time. It's not easy, but it's simple.
You don't need a grocery list, literally any food that fits your calories works. You can't "tone up" fast, you can lose fat through a calorie deficit and when the fat drops off you will be "toned" underneath. It takes me about 45 seconds to make my shake in the morning (protein powder, water, ice, instant coffee).
Honestly what I'm tired of on MFP are threads with people arguing about off-topic BS. Like "hey guys how do I paleo?" turns into 2 people arguing about how bad planet fitness is.
Nice example. At least I hope you were simply trying to provide an example of what the OP was talking about.
Hey guys, please make up a list of food I should eat, and also tell me how to work out, and where to buy my smoothies BUT DON'T TELL ME I SHOULD JUST FIGURE IT OUT MYSELF BECAUSE YOU DID. THAT'S MEAN AND RUDE AND ABUSIVE.
So tired of the crybabies on these forums dude. If you can't handle the internet, don't use public forums.
^This x2. Are we babies or adults?
X1000000.-1 -
This is by far, the meanest group of forum users i have ever seen.
Too many people get a bug up their bum.-2 -
hollydubs85 wrote: »
Exactomundo.
If you need to rely on external sources for motivation, what you're looking for is a reason to create an excuse to fail.
*liked*0 -
I agree with you but this is a battle you cannot win. It's a forum on a free, public site with, what, millions? of subscribers now.
I've been here a long time (this account is new), since wayyyy before the APP days when it was just a website. Nothing is going to change. Just ignore the stupids.-2 -
Those aren't your begonias.0
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Part of the problem are the questions being asked just don't have easy answers.
"How do I motivate myself?", "I just can't stick with a plan, can you help?" and questions like that are nearly impossible to answer. No one can motivate you but you. True story. Think about it. Before you decided for yourself that you needed to lose weight would anyone else have been able to convince you to do it? Would my telling you to "step away from the cookie" really convince you to not eat it if you really wanted it? Not likely. It really is a case of "Just do it, and don't let you talk yourself out of it."
The problem I have is that when people come in here asking questions and then don't like the answers even if they are the right answers. The girl who wants to drop 20 pounds in 2 weeks so she can fit into her bridesmaid dress may not like "You should have started months ago" or "there's no quick fix" but those answers are the truth. No one (no one sane, anyway) in here is going to tell her to go buy X pill, vomit after every meal and workout 12 hours a day to get to the goal she wants. She may believe there's a quick fix out there but most of us have learned that it's just not true and doing those types of things are not going to give her the results she wants even if she tried. I can't tell you how many times a poster has thrown a virtual tantrum because he or she got reasonable answers that weren't welcome and went against what they wanted to believe is true.
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LEVITATEME's post above is a good example of what I mean. Not the positive feedback most people need.
It's great it takes you 45 seconds to make a shake - I don't have that time so I am looking for something I can grab from fridge and walk out door. But I didn't ask that anyway so don't comment unless you know of a good pre-made shake suggestion.
Eat less - move more - really?!?! Yes it's true but it's about the least helpful thing I have ever heard. What people on here need is something in depth - links to a website you use, a book that really turned things around, some tales from your journey that might inspire them. Eat less and move more doesn't help lay out any specific plans which is what people here need.
And "you don't need a grocery list". Do you realize people who go the store without a grocery list tend to overeat and buy fattening items they don't need. Your always better shopping with a list. Yes - many of us DO need a grocery list and don't know how to make a healthy one ourselves.
POSITIVE FEEDBACK IS WHAT WE NEED! Not just you telling us it's all so simple and acting like why can't we all just figure this out.
Why is it my job to tell you how to make a grocery list? and why is it rude of me to say you should be able to figure that out yourself? This is a website that tells you the calorie content of every single food on earth. Pick out foods you like that fit the calories provided to you and go to the store and buy them.
From now on, my canned answer to every thread will be "you are doing everything exactly right. Good job."
And then people will be like "but wait you didn't answer any of my questions" and I will be like "You're so smart and strong."-5 -
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It's quite a phenomenon. And then it typically devolves into gifs and nonsense. I've moderated forums before, including a TEEN forum. And I've not seen anything with a specific goal and guidelines that goes so oddly awry.0
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levitateme wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »levitateme wrote: »Here are a few example of what I mean from my posts:
*I asked for a book with grocery lists and meal planner.
Reply: There's nothing you can't eat, you just need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight.
*Asked about a quick workout routine to tone up fast.
Reply: Buy a time machine. Should have started months ago.
*Asked about diseases that can cause weight gain.
Reply: You're looking for the easy way out.
*Asked for pre-made breakfast shake ideas (not something I had to make myself)
Reply: Couple thoughts. First, don't have time or don't want to make time?
These aren't the really mean ones calling me lazy and worthless. Jeez.
Not that bad but stay negative and on topic please!!!
So basically, you want people to do all the work for you and lie to you?
Until the terms of service state that you may not have an opinion, there really is no reason for these threads. I am not mean because I will tell you what is actually required to lose weight. Eat less, move more. Do it every day for a long time. It's not easy, but it's simple.
You don't need a grocery list, literally any food that fits your calories works. You can't "tone up" fast, you can lose fat through a calorie deficit and when the fat drops off you will be "toned" underneath. It takes me about 45 seconds to make my shake in the morning (protein powder, water, ice, instant coffee).
Honestly what I'm tired of on MFP are threads with people arguing about off-topic BS. Like "hey guys how do I paleo?" turns into 2 people arguing about how bad planet fitness is.
Nice example. At least I hope you were simply trying to provide an example of what the OP was talking about.
Hey guys, please make up a list of food I should eat, and also tell me how to work out, and where to buy my smoothies BUT DON'T TELL ME I SHOULD JUST FIGURE IT OUT MYSELF BECAUSE YOU DID. THAT'S MEAN AND RUDE AND ABUSIVE.
So tired of the crybabies on these forums dude. If you can't handle the internet, don't use public forums.
While I do think OP is taking some of the comments too personally I think you are being a bit hard on him and other new users. Calling people cyberbabies is uncalled for. For many people it takes time to learn to meal prep and how to do other things that will assist in weight loss. When starting out some people need step by step instructions to help them as they are still learning. Everyone starts at a different level. Some people grew up eating out almost every meal not knowing how to cook anything. Some people know how to cook but know nothing about nutrients or calorie counts. Some people know very little about exercise. They come to this site's message boards looking for tips/help to get started. Yes it's the internet but that's just an excuse for some people using the anonymity to be rude and sarcastic to others. "it's the internet" does not justify the rude behavior from some people. (and I don't mean the comments that are meant to be helpful but misunderstood)
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Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »It's quite a phenomenon. And then it typically devolves into gifs and nonsense. I've moderated forums before, including a TEEN forum. And I've not seen anything with a specific goal and guidelines that goes so oddly awry.
lol, you haven't seen gamer forums then. The inmates run the place so to speak.
I think a lot of it here is teen angst and hangry. Then some of us just want to see the world burn.0 -
Here are a few example of what I mean from my posts:
*I asked for a book with grocery lists and meal planner.
Reply: There's nothing you can't eat, you just need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight.
*Asked about a quick workout routine to tone up fast.
Reply: Buy a time machine. Should have started months ago.
*Asked about diseases that can cause weight gain.
Reply: You're looking for the easy way out.
*Asked for pre-made breakfast shake ideas (not something I had to make myself)
Reply: Couple thoughts. First, don't have time or don't want to make time?
These aren't the really mean ones calling me lazy and worthless. Jeez.
Not that bad but stay negative and on topic please!!!
1) I don't know of any books, but you can try the Nutrisystem web site. When I was on NS they had a suggested grocery list. You can also look at the Weight Watchers web site - I'm sure they have healthy meal planners. Or check Amazon.com for healthy recipe cookbooks.
2) I don't think a quick workout routine to tone up fast exists otherwise no one would be overweight and we wouldn't need to be here.
3) The only one I can think of is Thyroid Disease. But you can also try google...
4) I use Special K Proten Shakes when I'm in a hurry.
-2 -
Yep - and in a perfect world, I could just park my car and leave the keys in it... after all carrying around my keys is a drag - plus, y'know, people should just respect my right to personal property. But you know what - my car is locked and the keys are in my pocket.
I think people who want specific advice about their personal course of action are better served finding like-minded people in the groups. The public forums (by virtue of being public) tacitly invite others to chime in with their opinions.-1 -
Some people need a pep talk. Most people don't need tough love answers so keep them to yourself.
Ever heard of the saying "if you can say something nice don't say it all"? Try it out!-2 -
levitateme wrote: »From now on, my canned answer to every thread will be "you are doing everything exactly right. Good job."
And then people will be like "but wait you didn't answer any of my questions" and I will be like "You're so smart and strong."
That's basically where I'm at these days too. Even when I know that agreeing for the sake of their mental state will be negatively impactful to their stated mission.
Ain't my kin or my friends, so w/e.-1 -
hollydubs85 wrote: »Here are a few example of what I mean from my posts:
*I asked for a book with grocery lists and meal planner.
Reply: There's nothing you can't eat, you just need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight.
*Asked about a quick workout routine to tone up fast.
Reply: Buy a time machine. Should have started months ago.
*Asked about diseases that can cause weight gain.
Reply: You're looking for the easy way out.
*Asked for pre-made breakfast shake ideas (not something I had to make myself)
Reply: Couple thoughts. First, don't have time or don't want to make time?
These aren't the really mean ones calling me lazy and worthless. Jeez.
Not that bad but stay negative and on topic please!!!
But, those are truthful answers.
Truthful or not, they didn't answer her question. And some are just wildly off topic.0 -
LEVITATEME's post above is a good example of what I mean. Not the positive feedback most people need.
It's great it takes you 45 seconds to make a shake - I don't have that time so I am looking for something I can grab from fridge and walk out door. But I didn't ask that anyway so don't comment unless you know of a good pre-made shake suggestion.
Eat less - move more - really?!?! Yes it's true but it's about the least helpful thing I have ever heard. What people on here need is something in depth - links to a website you use, a book that really turned things around, some tales from your journey that might inspire them. Eat less and move more doesn't help lay out any specific plans which is what people here need.
And "you don't need a grocery list". Do you realize people who go the store without a grocery list tend to overeat and buy fattening items they don't need. Your always better shopping with a list. Yes - many of us DO need a grocery list and don't know how to make a healthy one ourselves.
POSITIVE FEEDBACK IS WHAT WE NEED! Not just you telling us it's all so simple and acting like why can't we all just figure this out.
I think for answers like that, google is your friend. Seriously, a large part of this you could do yourself.
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Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »It's quite a phenomenon. And then it typically devolves into gifs and nonsense. I've moderated forums before, including a TEEN forum. And I've not seen anything with a specific goal and guidelines that goes so oddly awry.
lol, you haven't seen gamer forums then. The inmates run the place so to speak.
I think a lot of it here is teen angst and hangry. Then some of us just want to see the world burn.
Or babycenter.com forums.0 -
Have you ever heard the saying, stop having boring tuna, stop having a boring life?Some people need a pep talk. Most people don't need tough love answers so keep them to yourself.
Ever heard of the saying "if you can say something nice don't say it all"? Try it out!
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People are wayyy to sensitive.
A lot of the time these threads are people starting topics looking for validation for their poor decisions.0 -
I like your post. I fully agree...I actually just made a new thread in another category as I've been feeling a little off the last few days...feeling like food is the enemy etc...the last thing I want/need is someone telling me to suck it up or oh it will get better...I am just seeking friendly encouragement
People are rude and inconsiderate and if things aren't going the way they want, they tend to be discouraging to others.
I'm a very positive person and do my best to show that in any answer I give on MFP or elsewhere for that matter. If I have nothing constructive to add, I don't.
and just a side rant..i really despise those posts about would you date the person above you or rate their hotness...pathetic-3 -
mommyrunning wrote: »levitateme wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »levitateme wrote: »Here are a few example of what I mean from my posts:
*I asked for a book with grocery lists and meal planner.
Reply: There's nothing you can't eat, you just need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight.
*Asked about a quick workout routine to tone up fast.
Reply: Buy a time machine. Should have started months ago.
*Asked about diseases that can cause weight gain.
Reply: You're looking for the easy way out.
*Asked for pre-made breakfast shake ideas (not something I had to make myself)
Reply: Couple thoughts. First, don't have time or don't want to make time?
These aren't the really mean ones calling me lazy and worthless. Jeez.
Not that bad but stay negative and on topic please!!!
So basically, you want people to do all the work for you and lie to you?
Until the terms of service state that you may not have an opinion, there really is no reason for these threads. I am not mean because I will tell you what is actually required to lose weight. Eat less, move more. Do it every day for a long time. It's not easy, but it's simple.
You don't need a grocery list, literally any food that fits your calories works. You can't "tone up" fast, you can lose fat through a calorie deficit and when the fat drops off you will be "toned" underneath. It takes me about 45 seconds to make my shake in the morning (protein powder, water, ice, instant coffee).
Honestly what I'm tired of on MFP are threads with people arguing about off-topic BS. Like "hey guys how do I paleo?" turns into 2 people arguing about how bad planet fitness is.
Nice example. At least I hope you were simply trying to provide an example of what the OP was talking about.
Hey guys, please make up a list of food I should eat, and also tell me how to work out, and where to buy my smoothies BUT DON'T TELL ME I SHOULD JUST FIGURE IT OUT MYSELF BECAUSE YOU DID. THAT'S MEAN AND RUDE AND ABUSIVE.
So tired of the crybabies on these forums dude. If you can't handle the internet, don't use public forums.
While I do think OP is taking some of the comments too personally I think you are being a bit hard on him and other new users. Calling people cyberbabies is uncalled for. For many people it takes time to learn to meal prep and how to do other things that will assist in weight loss. When starting out some people need step by step instructions to help them as they are still learning. Everyone starts at a different level. Some people grew up eating out almost every meal not knowing how to cook anything. Some people know how to cook but know nothing about nutrients or calorie counts. Some people know very little about exercise. They come to this site's message boards looking for tips/help to get started. Yes it's the internet but that's just an excuse for some people using the anonymity to be rude and sarcastic to others. "it's the internet" does not justify the rude behavior from some people. (and I don't mean the comments that are meant to be helpful but misunderstood)
This site is very tame compared to some forums I go to. People are very thin skinned here. They also think a differing opinion is an "attack." I really don't reply as much as I used to because I am tired of this attitude. I have reduced my BF% by 5% and increased my bench from 45 lbs to 100 lbs, but no one wants to listen to my advice because it isn't exactly what they want to hear delivered in a wrapped up box. So, I tend to just lurk and laugh at people and look at gifs. Good day, madam
-1 -
heh. I'll give $5 to anyone who goes there and posts that they gave their darling child some benadryl to help them go to sleep.hollydubs85 wrote: »Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »It's quite a phenomenon. And then it typically devolves into gifs and nonsense. I've moderated forums before, including a TEEN forum. And I've not seen anything with a specific goal and guidelines that goes so oddly awry.
lol, you haven't seen gamer forums then. The inmates run the place so to speak.
I think a lot of it here is teen angst and hangry. Then some of us just want to see the world burn.
Or babycenter.com forums.
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TL; DR
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Why is it my job to tell you how to make a grocery list? and why is it rude of me to say you should be able to figure that out yourself?
The question provided as an example was not how to make a grocery list. It was a request for a book that includes a grocery list.
I agree with the OP, and this is just one example of why. The original request/question/point has already been lost.0 -
But are they designed with a specific goal as this one is? Not usually. Just a free for all.Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »It's quite a phenomenon. And then it typically devolves into gifs and nonsense. I've moderated forums before, including a TEEN forum. And I've not seen anything with a specific goal and guidelines that goes so oddly awry.
lol, you haven't seen gamer forums then. The inmates run the place so to speak.
I think a lot of it here is teen angst and hangry. Then some of us just want to see the world burn.
0 -
heh. I'll give $5 to anyone who goes there and posts that they gave their darling child some benadryl to help them go to sleep.hollydubs85 wrote: »Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »It's quite a phenomenon. And then it typically devolves into gifs and nonsense. I've moderated forums before, including a TEEN forum. And I've not seen anything with a specific goal and guidelines that goes so oddly awry.
lol, you haven't seen gamer forums then. The inmates run the place so to speak.
I think a lot of it here is teen angst and hangry. Then some of us just want to see the world burn.
Or babycenter.com forums.
I'm from Oklahoma....don't you mean whiskey?
0 -
levitateme wrote: »mommyrunning wrote: »levitateme wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »levitateme wrote: »Here are a few example of what I mean from my posts:
*I asked for a book with grocery lists and meal planner.
Reply: There's nothing you can't eat, you just need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight.
*Asked about a quick workout routine to tone up fast.
Reply: Buy a time machine. Should have started months ago.
*Asked about diseases that can cause weight gain.
Reply: You're looking for the easy way out.
*Asked for pre-made breakfast shake ideas (not something I had to make myself)
Reply: Couple thoughts. First, don't have time or don't want to make time?
These aren't the really mean ones calling me lazy and worthless. Jeez.
Not that bad but stay negative and on topic please!!!
So basically, you want people to do all the work for you and lie to you?
Until the terms of service state that you may not have an opinion, there really is no reason for these threads. I am not mean because I will tell you what is actually required to lose weight. Eat less, move more. Do it every day for a long time. It's not easy, but it's simple.
You don't need a grocery list, literally any food that fits your calories works. You can't "tone up" fast, you can lose fat through a calorie deficit and when the fat drops off you will be "toned" underneath. It takes me about 45 seconds to make my shake in the morning (protein powder, water, ice, instant coffee).
Honestly what I'm tired of on MFP are threads with people arguing about off-topic BS. Like "hey guys how do I paleo?" turns into 2 people arguing about how bad planet fitness is.
Nice example. At least I hope you were simply trying to provide an example of what the OP was talking about.
Hey guys, please make up a list of food I should eat, and also tell me how to work out, and where to buy my smoothies BUT DON'T TELL ME I SHOULD JUST FIGURE IT OUT MYSELF BECAUSE YOU DID. THAT'S MEAN AND RUDE AND ABUSIVE.
So tired of the crybabies on these forums dude. If you can't handle the internet, don't use public forums.
While I do think OP is taking some of the comments too personally I think you are being a bit hard on him and other new users. Calling people cyberbabies is uncalled for. For many people it takes time to learn to meal prep and how to do other things that will assist in weight loss. When starting out some people need step by step instructions to help them as they are still learning. Everyone starts at a different level. Some people grew up eating out almost every meal not knowing how to cook anything. Some people know how to cook but know nothing about nutrients or calorie counts. Some people know very little about exercise. They come to this site's message boards looking for tips/help to get started. Yes it's the internet but that's just an excuse for some people using the anonymity to be rude and sarcastic to others. "it's the internet" does not justify the rude behavior from some people. (and I don't mean the comments that are meant to be helpful but misunderstood)
This site is very tame compared to some forums I go to. People are very thin skinned here. They also think a differing opinion is an "attack." I really don't reply as much as I used to because I am tired of this attitude. I have reduced my BF% by 5% and increased my bench from 45 lbs to 100 lbs, but no one wants to listen to my advice because it isn't exactly what they want to hear delivered in a wrapped up box. So, I tend to just lurk and laugh at people and look at gifs. Good day, madam
liked.
I read the last line in the voice of Gene Wilder.0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWRyj5cHIQA
This discussion has been closed.
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