hotties only date other hotties...

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  • K_Serz
    K_Serz Posts: 1,299 Member
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    yea, I'm kidding. Some people actually prefer intelligent conversations with a decent person. It's not all about looks and money. Well, not for everyone, anyway....

    Actually not true. A study was conducted (was watching Science Channel so dont have a link to the article) regarding human attractiveness and what scientists discovered is that humans will select each other based on a rating + or - a number. For example someone that was rated an avg of 5 by all other participants would select a 4, 5 or a 6 as their preference for a partner.

    So what your topic says actually correlates.


    may be true for some, but definitely not for all.

    Yes. Those outliers usually have pretty big bank accounts.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    yea, I'm kidding. Some people actually prefer intelligent conversations with a decent person. It's not all about looks and money. Well, not for everyone, anyway....

    Actually not true. A study was conducted (was watching Science Channel so dont have a link to the article) regarding human attractiveness and what scientists discovered is that humans will select each other based on a rating + or - a number. For example someone that was rated an avg of 5 by all other participants would select a 4, 5 or a 6 as their preference for a partner.

    So what your topic says actually correlates.


    may be true for some, but definitely not for all.

    Yes. Those outliers usually have pretty big bank accounts.

    hmm, would apply.... if I've ever been a golddigger, but never have been, so try again.
  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,141 Member
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    I must say for me it is personality and looks, looks which are hot to me though, doesn't mean someone else will agree what I find hot is their hot.

    I've never cared if they have money, as long as they work and aren't lazy....I finance myself, don't need anyone to do that for me.
  • DonPidgeon
    DonPidgeon Posts: 20 Member
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    I've found it very hard to prove my intelligence and humor when I don't have the looks for them initiate a conversation with me. ;)
  • diodelcibo
    diodelcibo Posts: 2,564 Member
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    True story.
  • Sweaty_N_Hungry
    Sweaty_N_Hungry Posts: 142
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    yea, I'm kidding. Some people actually prefer intelligent conversations with a decent person. It's not all about looks and money. Well, not for everyone, anyway....

    Okay don't take me wrong, I'm certainly not attacking you or your post. But for sake of discussion...

    If looks don't matter, why do you work so hard at looking so good? Or does your post not reflect your opinion of this?

    this is a 2-part answer, actually. The post was a joke of another chit chat post and I work so hard at looking good for myself. My post does reflect this opinion, as I've always gone for personality over what others would say was "hot".

    Of course, we all have our preferences. In spite of that, it has always been mind blowing of the self body image we have in our mind versus how others see us. Not only that, but the work we will put into ourselves in order to achieve that desired body. Yet, when it comes to a mate, we are so forgiving when it come to their body image. For instance you're very fit, easy to look at, and look amazing in a swimsuit; however, you'll put so much more emphasis on personality than you do on appearance.

    I just don't comprehend how that happens.
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
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    I've dated a number of guys who my friends did not find attractive at all. My idea of attractive apparently doesn't necessarily correlate with what people consider "conventional" good looks. I had a crush on a guy friend years ago....one of my friends told me to my face that this guy was ugly and she had no idea how I could possibly like him (I'm no longer good friends with HER because she was kind of a jerk)...I WAS attracted to him, but what really attracted me to him was his kindness and spirit...unfortunately, he also recently came out as gay so that didn't quite work out (he's still a great friend though lol).

    I guess I don't look for "hotties" when I'm considering dating someone...I want someone that I have chemistry with/attraction to, for sure--but that is SO subjective and individual. And looks don't last forever. I want someone who I find attractive and who finds me attractive, but I'm in my 40s--eventually guys in my age range lose their hair (if they haven't already), women go gray, etc. Real relationships last beyond the superficial stuff on the outside.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    yea, I'm kidding. Some people actually prefer intelligent conversations with a decent person. It's not all about looks and money. Well, not for everyone, anyway....

    Okay don't take me wrong, I'm certainly not attacking you or your post. But for sake of discussion...

    If looks don't matter, why do you work so hard at looking so good? Or does your post not reflect your opinion of this?

    this is a 2-part answer, actually. The post was a joke of another chit chat post and I work so hard at looking good for myself. My post does reflect this opinion, as I've always gone for personality over what others would say was "hot".

    Of course, we all have our preferences. In spite of that, it has always been mind blowing of the self body image we have in our mind versus how others see us. Not only that, but the work we will put into ourselves in order to achieve that desired body. Yet, when it comes to a mate, we are so forgiving when it come to their body image. For instance you're very fit, easy to look at, and look amazing in a swimsuit; however, you'll put so much more emphasis on personality than you do on appearance.

    I just don't comprehend how that happens.

    first of all, thank you. Second, I have a no *kitten* dating rule, so there's that. I also genuinely like a good conversation. If he looks good and has an amazing personality, well, that's a bonus. But, looks just aren't everything to me.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    I've dated a number of guys who my friends did not find attractive at all. My idea of attractive apparently doesn't necessarily correlate with what people consider "conventional" good looks. I had a crush on a guy friend years ago....one of my friends told me to my face that this guy was ugly and she had no idea how I could possibly like him (I'm no longer good friends with HER because she was kind of a jerk)...I WAS attracted to him, but what really attracted me to him was his kindness and spirit...unfortunately, he also recently came out as gay so that didn't quite work out (he's still a great friend though lol).

    I guess I don't look for "hotties" when I'm considering dating someone...I want someone that I have chemistry with/attraction to, for sure--but that is SO subjective and individual. And looks don't last forever. I want someone who I find attractive and who finds me attractive, but I'm in my 40s--eventually guys in my age range lose their hair (if they haven't already), women go gray, etc. Real relationships last beyond the superficial stuff on the outside.

    This exactly! I want someone that I have a connection with, not just who looks good on my arm.
  • thesupremeforce
    thesupremeforce Posts: 1,206 Member
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    That's settled. I'm hanging out with you people.
    It's too late to lock the door, because I'm already here.
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
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    So where the hell do I sit on this scale?

    The last two women I asked out blew me off. One did the Old, "maybe", "We'll see". WTF, am I a six year old asking for a cookie? Just say thanks but no thanks. The second woman had been flirting with me for weeks, and yes it was flirting, not just being nice. She made several remarks about how she would date me, liked older men, how she found my sense of humor to be attracitve quality. When I asked her out on a date, she said yes, then when we went to nail down plans, she said she just wanted to do a freinds thing cuz she isnt ready to date anyone yet... SMH...

    At this rate, I almost want to give up on women all together... well, not all together, but dating is making me want to get a mail order bride

    No I am not rich, but make a good living, I may not be totally hot, but not bad either, and as for personality, effin forget about it, I am the funniest person I know, bar none! It should also be noted that while I play a bad boy on TV, I am easily wrapped around a womans finger and whipped behind closed doors. Perfect guy, I tell you! LOL

    Go ahead ladies, give me some honest feedback, what the hell are you looking for?

    I haven't dated in about 9 years for a variety of reasons, and I am just dipping my toes in the water at this point and THINKING about it. So I am probably not a great one to give advice because I am so out of practice. As another poster mentioned, I don't know you at all either, but I also creeped your profile. You appear (on MFP) to be a great guy who is working very hard to stay healthy and fit! Besides looks, job, humor (that's a huge bonus) and working on physical fitness, there are other qualities I personally would seek in a guy and I wouldn't know that about you until I got to know you. I also don't want to date people outside of my geographic area, that's just my personal bias at this time in my life. So if you asked why I wouldn't be interested--that would basically cover it.

    As for the women you asked out who blew you off--that does suck. Especially the one who agreed to go out and then changed her mind. But that's about her/them, not you. Women, just like men, can be flaky at times. I wouldn't give up--you clearly did NOT give up on recovering from your injuries, and you've lost a lot of weight--that's pretty amazing!
  • Sweaty_N_Hungry
    Sweaty_N_Hungry Posts: 142
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    Okay, so let's pretend you're sitting there. I'm visually oriented. You're attracted to personality. How is it that you'll find that I have an amazing personality? Perhaps I'm a little nervous around someone so attractive, but I'm confident that I have a lot to offer. I imagine that subconsciously you're still basing your initial impression off of looks alone. Something about my looks will disarm you enough to let me "enter" and allow me to be myself.

    Anyway...I'm really only writing all this to appear somewhat like I have a decent personality, but in all honesty. had you not been wearing that bikini, I'd not be sitting here writing all that I have. Now don't judge me...because you have your own set of attraction rules: You sit there and will talk to a guy because he has a "nice personality". On the other hand, I have my set of rules: I value a nice looking booty in a bikini and should not be penalized for it. Yet the moment I say that, you (you as in women in general) automatically disqualify a guy that is as honest as I might be.
    yea, I'm kidding. Some people actually prefer intelligent conversations with a decent person. It's not all about looks and money. Well, not for everyone, anyway....


    first of all, thank you. Second, I have a no *kitten* dating rule, so there's that. I also genuinely like a good conversation. If he looks good and has an amazing personality, well, that's a bonus. But, looks just aren't everything to me.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
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    I've dated a number of guys who my friends did not find attractive at all. My idea of attractive apparently doesn't necessarily correlate with what people consider "conventional" good looks. I had a crush on a guy friend years ago....one of my friends told me to my face that this guy was ugly and she had no idea how I could possibly like him (I'm no longer good friends with HER because she was kind of a jerk)...I WAS attracted to him, but what really attracted me to him was his kindness and spirit...unfortunately, he also recently came out as gay so that didn't quite work out (he's still a great friend though lol).

    I guess I don't look for "hotties" when I'm considering dating someone...I want someone that I have chemistry with/attraction to, for sure--but that is SO subjective and individual. And looks don't last forever. I want someone who I find attractive and who finds me attractive, but I'm in my 40s--eventually guys in my age range lose their hair (if they haven't already), women go gray, etc. Real relationships last beyond the superficial stuff on the outside.

    This exactly! I want someone that I have a connection with, not just who looks good on my arm.

    hahaha
    Well if I have that awesome connection, then regardless of what anyone else thinks, that guy ALWAYS looks good on my arm. And I check out the view often. :wink:
    Also, I have dated various races, ages, heights, sizes, guys with personality, no personality, nice guys, *kitten*, rich guys, poor guys, etc... I don't care. If you are creative, intelligent, make me laugh, and most importantly, make me feel at ease and comfortable around you, I'm interested.
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
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    I go for the poor, dumb, ugly one's.

    They put out faster.
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
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    I've found it very hard to prove my intelligence and humor when I don't have the looks for them initiate a conversation with me. ;)

    I don't know if it's different in Sweden. In the USA, most women don't initiate conversation because of conventional "rules" that make us seem aggressive or unladylike if we show too much interest (as lame as that is)...I used to ask guys out all the time when I was younger and my friends told me I was "chasing" guys and should stop, because then they'd come to me. Wasn't necessarily true--I've gone about 9 years with barely a date, because NOONE is asking me out. But I do think women struggle with this--we sometimes feel like we have to wait for a guy to initiate something. Maybe you need to initiate the conversations first?
  • aaronlawrenc
    aaronlawrenc Posts: 666 Member
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    good thing im funny and smart so i can trick you into talking to me and then laugh your pants off....60% of the time it works every time.
  • aaronlawrenc
    aaronlawrenc Posts: 666 Member
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    I go for the poor, dumb, ugly one's.

    They put out faster.

    and this
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    Okay, so let's pretend you're sitting there. I'm visually oriented. You're attracted to personality. How is it that you'll find that I have an amazing personality? Perhaps I'm a little nervous around someone so attractive, but I'm confident that I have a lot to offer. I imagine that subconsciously you're still basing your initial impression off of looks alone. Something about my looks will disarm you enough to let me "enter" and allow me to be myself.

    Anyway...I'm really only writing all this to appear somewhat like I have a decent personality, but in all honesty. had you not been wearing that bikini, I'd not be sitting here writing all that I have. Now don't judge me...because you have your own set of attraction rules: You sit there and will talk to a guy because he has a "nice personality". On the other hand, I have my set of rules: I value a nice looking booty in a bikini and should not be penalized for it. Yet the moment I say that, you (you as in women in general) automatically disqualify a guy that is as honest as I might be.
    yea, I'm kidding. Some people actually prefer intelligent conversations with a decent person. It's not all about looks and money. Well, not for everyone, anyway....


    first of all, thank you. Second, I have a no *kitten* dating rule, so there's that. I also genuinely like a good conversation. If he looks good and has an amazing personality, well, that's a bonus. But, looks just aren't everything to me.


    take the guy I've been dating on and off for 6 months or so... he's not the classic "hotty" (he's in my album). I got to know him and fell for him by getting to know him as a person, therefore, fell for his personality. We talked quite a bit before we were able to see each other in person again after 18 years (high school). For the record, I like honesty. If looks is what initially drew a guy to me, its what did, but I guarantee they will stay because of who I am, because I have more to offer than just my looks.
  • footiechick82
    footiechick82 Posts: 1,203 Member
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    I'm enjoying reading this.

    Generally speaking, women will date men that are less attractive then they are and men will look for women that are super attractive or out of their league... per stats I've read and can't remember where. I think a fitness magazine.

    This isn't always the case. However, I know that women are often a lot harder on themselves then men are in regards to looks and keeping themselves healthy. Women are emotional, men are physical.
  • Sweaty_N_Hungry
    Sweaty_N_Hungry Posts: 142
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    How do I take you up on your guarantee? I want in on that : )
    Okay, so let's pretend you're sitting there. I'm visually oriented. You're attracted to personality. How is it that you'll find that I have an amazing personality? Perhaps I'm a little nervous around someone so attractive, but I'm confident that I have a lot to offer. I imagine that subconsciously you're still basing your initial impression off of looks alone. Something about my looks will disarm you enough to let me "enter" and allow me to be myself.

    Anyway...I'm really only writing all this to appear somewhat like I have a decent personality, but in all honesty. had you not been wearing that bikini, I'd not be sitting here writing all that I have. Now don't judge me...because you have your own set of attraction rules: You sit there and will talk to a guy because he has a "nice personality". On the other hand, I have my set of rules: I value a nice looking booty in a bikini and should not be penalized for it. Yet the moment I say that, you (you as in women in general) automatically disqualify a guy that is as honest as I might be.
    yea, I'm kidding. Some people actually prefer intelligent conversations with a decent person. It's not all about looks and money. Well, not for everyone, anyway....


    first of all, thank you. Second, I have a no *kitten* dating rule, so there's that. I also genuinely like a good conversation. If he looks good and has an amazing personality, well, that's a bonus. But, looks just aren't everything to me.

    take the guy I've been dating on and off for 6 months or so... he's not the classic "hotty" (he's in my album). I got to know him and fell for him by getting to know him as a person, therefore, fell for his personality. We talked quite a bit before we were able to see each other in person again after 18 years (high school). For the record, I like honesty. If looks is what initially drew a guy to me, its what did, but I guarantee they will stay because of who I am, because I have more to offer than just my looks.

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