Depression and Weight Loss
Replies
-
Hi folks,
I have been confronted today with the opinions of others regarding me and noticed that as the day progressed, I discovered that I have a higher degree if resilience than I thought. The opinions were not about my weight by they might as well have been. I am aware that I tend not established clear boundaries and I am easily wounded and hurt by the views and thoughts of others. However, today I made up my mind that what I think about me and how I value myself is far more important than the courts of world opinion. I have to rise and fall according to how I choose to think, feel, and react and I can, like anyone else, make mistakes and be perfectly imperfect. Depression has an awful way of blasting confidence and self-love. Let's all decide that how we choose to think about ourselves is negotiable and not fixed in time. We are not defined by the past, our errors, our weight or the ability to meet the expectation of others. We are works in progress.
1 -
shelleygold wrote: »Hi folks,
I have been confronted today with the opinions of others regarding me and noticed that as the day progressed, I discovered that I have a higher degree if resilience than I thought. The opinions were not about my weight by they might as well have been. I am aware that I tend not established clear boundaries and I am easily wounded and hurt by the views and thoughts of others. However, today I made up my mind that what I think about me and how I value myself is far more important than the courts of world opinion. I have to rise and fall according to how I choose to think, feel, and react and I can, like anyone else, make mistakes and be perfectly imperfect. Depression has an awful way of blasting confidence and self-love. Let's all decide that how we choose to think about ourselves is negotiable and not fixed in time. We are not defined by the past, our errors, our weight or the ability to meet the expectation of others. We are works in progress.
i second that! and may i add that i'm so glad that how i choose to think about myself right not is NOT fixed. i am deep in it, but it won't last. it can't.0 -
angelexperiment wrote: »Everything moves together, my anxiety and depression and eating. They cycle together, and right now they're all up it makes me feel so tired. What do you guys do when you just want to stop trying?
Take it one day at a time and one choice at a time. I choose to exercise today (bc even tho I am really resistant on it I will feel much better) I choose to not let one bad food choice roll into a day long or weeklong binge or bad eating ( bc I know if you make the healthier choice I will feel good instead of awful for breaking my self promise)
1 -
You know, seeing the posts here really underlines the fact that people with clinical depression will experience it differently. It's weird, I know exercise helps a lot of people with depression, but I guess I'm one of the rare ones. For me, exercise doesn't help. Eating doesn't really help either. My issues with food are simply the fact that when I got a desk job, I wasn't burning as many calories but didn't adjust my calories in. So for ME, it's not a bad food relationship to break, just learning portion control. And exercise is always a chore for me due to asthma. I'm starting to get it under control, but even though I can walk a good 45 minute walk that gets my heart rate up decently, I still hate it. The only reason I'm still doing it is the Zombies Run app. Even the fact that it's helping my asthma isn't enough to keep me walking.
Not sure what my point is here, to be honest, I guess I just want to point out that while trying exercise to help with depression is a step you need to try, if it doesn't help, that's ok. Still need to do something because it's good for you in other ways, but if it doesn't help your depression, there are other things to try.0 -
I have also battled with my weight and bi polar disorder pretty much my whole life. I have found that in order for me to be physically healthy I first have to tend to my health mentally. That means taking my meds talking to and being honest with my therapist and phycologists. Sometimes therapy really helps me when I'm going thru my lows. I used to be ashamed of my diagnosis, because the way the public portrays people with bipolar as being "crazy", but now that I have accepted that thats apart of who I am I'm finally on the road to recovery and getting healthy. Ik I'm a stranger but if u ever need an ear I'm a great listener I feel for u and can relate.1
-
Ok Team!
I'm back. Must have been the B6 and Fish Oil( if only it was that simple).
Hit a road bump but that is life. It's interesting how the mind works. Just felt so dark, alone, fat, judged and hopeless. It was triggered by a situation which required problem solving rather than emotion but it took me a bit to get there. I'm not a big fan of wading through past impacts because that can be seen as somewhere between indulgent and making excuses. We are all victims and all survivors. We are all weakened by life and the strengthened by how we move through our challenges.
So... I invite my tribe to write one challenge they have had recently and what helped and what didn't help?
For me, the challenge was judgement and exclusion by others. What didn't help was blaming myself and inflating the issue. What helped was:
1. Talking about my feelings
2. Letting myself go through the pain
3. Confronting and problem solving
4. And writing to you.
Your turn0 -
I find myself obsessing a bit with going to the gym and walking. It seems that I cannot imagine sticking to a strict eating regime unless I link it to heavy work-outs. When I think about it, I wonder if I am impatient and want to see immediate results. Patients is a skill and an attribute. I suspect that depression makes the waiting period more difficult because optimism, is required when one is hoping for outcomes. Perhaps depression paints the outcome dark so what is the point of putting in the effort. So....cannot give into that line of thinking as it leads to giving up. I must have been sleeping when G-D was giving the lessons on moderation and planning. Oh well. Never too late to learn.
Walked by my favourite cafe the other day. Sign said OCD (Obsessive Coffee Disorder). Might indulge in that obsession now. Hope everyone is well.
S
0 -
Just reviewing some of the posts and found myself marvelling at the intelligence in peoples' thoughts and experiences. Whether we think Depression is managed medically, psychologically, spiritually or physically, we are left with the challenge that our brains are ever changing and there is always hope. Similarly, the science of weight loss always requires flexible thinking and a whole shift in attitude and orientation. I suppose we are after long term changes and benefits rather than fad-based responses that make us think there is a short cut to healthy living.
Hope you are are all loving yourselves through whatever is causing you pain and remember that you are never alone.
S0 -
Hi Shellygold (and others),
I just wanted to say thankyou for starting this thread and to everyone who has contributed. I just avidly read every word of your experiences and I like hearing about how you face your challenges.
I experience relatively mild bouts of depressive feelings and meaninglessness, but they are still acutely miserable.
I have a kind of mental checklist for well being - enough sleep, exercise, nutritious food, socialise with at least 2 people and do something that feels productive. If I don't do these things, especially a couple of days in a row I am much more susceptible to having a day where I feel terrible.
If I'm feeling down I try to fit them into my day... I can turn it around or make it less bad if I catch it early enough; if I don't, then I might not be motivated enough to help myself and I need to wait out the worst of it before I can.
Much love to everyone who has posted here.
0 -
Dear FrankieandSpots,
Thanks for your lovely words and thoughts about your own challenges and how you are managing your depressed feelings. I like your idea of a mental checklist. I hadn't thought about how we circumvent depression with a deliberate set of strategies; like a pilot checking on all of the functions of his/her plane prior to lift off. Once the bird leaves the tarmac, there has to be some confidence that everything looked ok. You clearly have great insight and self-awareness with regards to what you need to be more positive.
I also take your point about the "meaning" of life. I recall the writings of an author/Psychiatrist who survived one of the death camps during the Holocaust. (Victor Frankyl) who wrote about his experiences in Auschwitz. He wrote a book titled "Man's Search For Meaning". Dr Frankyl concluded that the meaning life offers is the meaning we give it. I know that sounds circular but when you think about it, it kind of makes sense. If I am having a "bad" day, someone else may have the exact same type of day but think about it differently. They may say to themselves, "what did I learn about myself today", or " what challenges did I face". Dr Frankyl said that he survived the camp because he made himself think differently about what he was going through and what kind things he could latch on to no matter how few and far between. I get some strength from this during my darker moments.
Anyways, didn't mean to go on and on.
Thanks for your message again and have a great day.
Shel
0 -
wow, the last two posts were powerful for me. I have been really struggling lately because my favorite anti-depressant strategy has been unavailable. sooooooo, i guess what i've learned about myself is: i don't have enough adequate strategies! I read about Dr. Frankyl's experiences in a huff post article online about a month ago and thought to myself: i need to read that book someday! so thanks for reminding me about that.
socializing and feeling productive..... two GREAT ideas i agree that "help" but i've never put them down in writing, until now. so, thanks for THAT too!
i was "forced" to socialize this past weekend, even though i really didn't feel up to it. it took me out of my own mental "stuff" for a while, which always helps ease the worst of depression. perhaps i'm on an upswing. even without exercise.
with a little luck, i'll be more active on this thread in the coming week.0 -
I don't have anything to add to this thread. But I wanted to thank you all for your posts. I've really been struggling lately and found this thread by chance. It was exactly what I needed. Thanks to everyone for sharing their suggestions and strategies. I have read some things that I will definitely start using. Its true that you never know who is reading and who may benefit from your words.0
-
I don't have depression but I do have quite severe anxiety and for me I either over eat when stressed or I don't have an appetite at all. My last panic attack last week has made my appetite pretty much non-existent so I'm now trying to add in high calorie foods in small doses to try and reach my calorie intake.. Exercise always helps to create an environment where you aren't thinking as much either with depression and anxiety, but make sure you choose and exercise routine which you enjoy and would want to go back to0
-
shelleygold wrote: »Ok Team!
I'm back. Must have been the B6 and Fish Oil( if only it was that simple).
Hit a road bump but that is life. It's interesting how the mind works. Just felt so dark, alone, fat, judged and hopeless. It was triggered by a situation which required problem solving rather than emotion but it took me a bit to get there. I'm not a big fan of wading through past impacts because that can be seen as somewhere between indulgent and making excuses. We are all victims and all survivors. We are all weakened by life and the strengthened by how we move through our challenges.
So... I invite my tribe to write one challenge they have had recently and what helped and what didn't help?
For me, the challenge was judgement and exclusion by others. What didn't help was blaming myself and inflating the issue. What helped was:
1. Talking about my feelings
2. Letting myself go through the pain
3. Confronting and problem solving
4. And writing to you.
Your turn
A recent challenge was some very, very harsh criticism I wasn't expecting around my creative work by someone I look up to and admire. It came at a very inopportune time, and I'm still not over it. What helped was:
1. First, NOT talking about it was the best thing. I waited, cried, and sat with it until I could reorganize my thinking away from catastrophizing and universal statements (eg. I suck and can't do anything and should quit, my life is meaningless and useless, etc etc).
2. Then talking about it in a heavily distanced manner, to see how other people picked it apart and were not emotional around it (seeing the other persons side, etc).
3. Humour. Making jokes about it, being exaggerated, has really helped me avoid completely spiralling. I kept thinking of this moment in Friends With Benefits that has always made me laugh, and felt really applicable
I still haven't really dealt with it, but I have been able to keep working on other things and not start a spiral of hopelessness that tends to end in hiding at home from my work and eating everything. So that's a win! What hasn't helped is continuing to hold onto it, and still letting some catastrophizing thoughts stick with me as little irritating "suggestions" from the part of myself that likes to tear me down. Need to squash that. But I'm still pleased with how I handled it, because I was already not doing well and I could have easily spiralled.
0 -
I've also been very depressed. I got out of an engagement with the love of my like at the end of June.0
-
BethMilledge wrote: »I've also been very depressed. I got out of an engagement with the love of my like at the end of June.
I'm sorry for your loss. Hang in there! I try my best to remember: 'this too shall pass'0 -
KAE612: congratulations on handling the harsh criticism without a downward spiral! i, for one, appreciate you sharing this experience.0
-
I have been following a thread which implies that once a person becomes "fat" he/she is doomed to remain "fat".
I find it fascinating that people show their deeper values as they vote for either side of this rather futile hypothesis. Like mental health, weight is due to many variables. I think we need to trust that we can change our bodies and our minds with clear choices and healthy decision making... in the context of self love and acceptance.
What do you think?
S
0 -
hi all
i've been going thru some stressful outside situations which bring my depression and anxiety to a head.
I do try to tell people what i need. space, time to think it over but not all people respect those requests.
When i run and/or walk the dog, i try to sort things out.
When i teach yoga, we always start with a seated meditation and i talk about using a " brush" to sweep away anxiety and stress and that which we cannot control. And opening our minds to the light and joy of the world. It helps me and the students say they enjoy it as well.0 -
KAE612: congratulations on handling the harsh criticism without a downward spiral! i, for one, appreciate you sharing this experience.
Thank you. I haven't done so well afterwards (I had a bit of a spiral the last few days, unfortunately) but I still think there's something to be learned from how I managed to at least hold it off until I finished an important task (studying for and completing a midterm) that was immediate. I'm hoping to remember this for the future.shelleygold wrote: »I have been following a thread which implies that once a person becomes "fat" he/she is doomed to remain "fat".
I find it fascinating that people show their deeper values as they vote for either side of this rather futile hypothesis. Like mental health, weight is due to many variables. I think we need to trust that we can change our bodies and our minds with clear choices and healthy decision making... in the context of self love and acceptance.
What do you think?
S
I agree. I weighed in on that thread, and I still stand by my hypothesis. That there are many root causes for weight, and if they are not addressed it is very difficult to keep it off. Along with the cultural misunderstanding of how weight gain and loss occurs (caloric surplus/deficit). I also think that by using the word "fat" we undermine the successes of people simply becoming "less fat" by moving down a class of obesity, or becoming "overweight" instead of obese. I still think that's a win that needs to be acknowledged.0 -
shelleygold wrote: »I have been following a thread which implies that once a person becomes "fat" he/she is doomed to remain "fat".
I find it fascinating that people show their deeper values as they vote for either side of this rather futile hypothesis. Like mental health, weight is due to many variables. I think we need to trust that we can change our bodies and our minds with clear choices and healthy decision making... in the context of self love and acceptance.
What do you think?
S
i apologize for being flippant, BUT.....
whomever implies that "once a person becomes fat they are doomed to remain...." needs to take their crystal ball to the shop, cause it's broken.
thats what i think0 -
hi all
i've been going thru some stressful outside situations which bring my depression and anxiety to a head.
I do try to tell people what i need. space, time to think it over but not all people respect those requests.
When i run and/or walk the dog, i try to sort things out.
When i teach yoga, we always start with a seated meditation and i talk about using a " brush" to sweep away anxiety and stress and that which we cannot control. And opening our minds to the light and joy of the world. It helps me and the students say they enjoy it as well.
my yoga teacher says something similar and i enjoy it too ... for me, personally, the mental aspects of yoga are more beneficial than the physical. (but i'll take both, hehe)0 -
Everything moves together, my anxiety and depression and eating. They cycle together, and right now they're all up it makes me feel so tired. What do you guys do when you just want to stop trying?
I force myself to exercise. I give myself permission to stop if I need to. (I never do.) I do modify on low energy days, for example, I will skip the Sun Salutation part of my yoga practice or break off gardening sooner, etc.
I guess I am fortunate that exercise always changes my state. Simple things like taking a shower does too.0 -
kshama2001 wrote: »I guess I am fortunate that exercise always changes my state. Simple things like taking a shower does too.
btw, kshama2001, you couldn't have pegged it better: no matter how much i tried to modify, yogaX just increased my hip pain. My physical therapist nailed it: the dr. had the right idea, wrong approach. I have backed off EVERYTHING, including yoga, and she has devised a tiny, baby squat-like exercise to help me focus on the first needed step. so, there you go. i shall keep trying. She also used something called "dry needling" on me at my last appointment. i'm keeping my fingers crossed and trying not to lament over this "perfect" running weather.0 -
Hi Everyone,
It is mental health week here in Australia and I am fascinated with the attempts by the media, organizations, and health professionals alike to increase awareness in relation to the true challenges to support individuals and families with mental health challenges. Although I appreciate the gestures and the attention, what I think is missing from most of the "surfacy" kind of rhetoric and motherhood statements is the recognition that individuals who are managing their own internal strife are not necessarily SICK. I do not hold the view that we are ill. There isn't a Depression germ or an Anxiety virus. Our brains have been changed over time due to chemical abnormalities, social impacts, traumas, coping strategies that stopped working long ago, circumstantial pressure and overwhelming life challenges. So....we are left with the pieces of the puzzle to reassemble and quite often there is little recognition or actual support around at the level and degree required. There are caring people, knowledgable professional and services but it has been my experience that I am accountable to myself for getting better and I would like that to be recognized and supported in meaningful ways. This thread is one of my strategies which I have found extremely healing and enlightening. I do not chose to rely on medication and really want to change the way my brain responds to aspects of my life including how I eat, exercise and function. Please understand that I am not anti-medication and I totally support those of us who find value and relief from medical interventions. I just know that the medical interventions do not teach skills or strategies given the assumptions of the "illness" model. I want to believe that I can learn how to manage my life differently and more specifically my thought processes and my responses to life. I would really like to know what you think about this area?
0 -
shelleygold wrote: »Hi Everyone,
It is mental health week here in Australia and I am fascinated with the attempts by the media, organizations, and health professionals alike to increase awareness in relation to the true challenges to support individuals and families with mental health challenges. Although I appreciate the gestures and the attention, what I think is missing from most of the "surfacy" kind of rhetoric and motherhood statements is the recognition that individuals who are managing their own internal strife are not necessarily SICK. I do not hold the view that we are ill. There isn't a Depression germ or an Anxiety virus. Our brains have been changed over time due to chemical abnormalities, social impacts, traumas, coping strategies that stopped working long ago, circumstantial pressure and overwhelming life challenges. So....we are left with the pieces of the puzzle to reassemble and quite often there is little recognition or actual support around at the level and degree required. There are caring people, knowledgable professional and services but it has been my experience that I am accountable to myself for getting better and I would like that to be recognized and supported in meaningful ways. This thread is one of my strategies which I have found extremely healing and enlightening. I do not chose to rely on medication and really want to change the way my brain responds to aspects of my life including how I eat, exercise and function. Please understand that I am not anti-medication and I totally support those of us who find value and relief from medical interventions. I just know that the medical interventions do not teach skills or strategies given the assumptions of the "illness" model. I want to believe that I can learn how to manage my life differently and more specifically my thought processes and my responses to life. I would really like to know what you think about this area?
I think your perspective is really interesting. I've never really thought of it like that, but I don't think I believe in the "illness model" as well, because you're right, it's not a virus or bacteria. It's also not genetic like some other mental issues are (autism, dyslexia, etc).
I personally am very much against medication for anxiety, and think of it as only a last-resort short-term solution for depression. I know that's not everyone's journey, but from the reading I've done on the medications for these "illnesses" is that for the most part the side effects (harm) outweigh the benefit, and the benefit dwindles over time. At the very least, I'm against it for myself. And I think conceiving of it as an "illness" leads to the simplistic belief that you can just pop a pill and be done with it. Which, even if you are on medication, is never the whole story (therapy or self-help).
I would say it makes more sense to me as more of an "injury" model. I've been in physio for issues related to tense IT bands in my legs, which have caused a whole host of other knee-related issues (like my knee dislocating for a while, that was not fun). I see a lot of similarities. You go to a professional who may or may not be also trained as a doctor, you get things to practice on, and then you get checked out next time. It's also likely something you'll have to deal with, maybe on and off, for the rest of your life. Like my IT bands, I'll have stretches to do when I feel them tensing, but I may have soreness and repeated injuries forever anyway. What's changed is now I know how to do both preventative and remedial exercises. And I think anxiety and depression work similarly. We learn strategies on how to deal with it over time, and do preventative things like talk therapy or CBT, but sometimes we still get caught up in it.
I just thought of this now, so it might not make sense to anyone else, but it just kinda makes sense to me? Thanks for the thinking point!0 -
I have also battled with my weight and bi polar disorder pretty much my whole life. I have found that in order for me to be physically healthy I first have to tend to my health mentally. That means taking my meds talking to and being honest with my therapist and phycologists. Sometimes therapy really helps me when I'm going thru my lows. I used to be ashamed of my diagnosis, because the way the public portrays people with bipolar as being "crazy", but now that I have accepted that thats apart of who I am I'm finally on the road to recovery and getting healthy. Ik I'm a stranger but if u ever need an ear I'm a great listener I feel for u and can relate.
We're all a bit "crazy" in our own way. My way of coping with issues from the abuse was an addiction, but since it was eating and food I could get away with it longer than if it were something illegal. But it was just as destructive. First I had to sort through those issues. Part of that was learning it wasn't my fault that I got shamed constantly and beaten occasionally. I learned that being able to say it happened wasn't something I had ti hide - being taught it was "my fault" and "no one can know to protect the family" was part of the abuse.
Acknowledging that it happened was the first step and really learning it wasn't my fault was the second step.0 -
shelleygold wrote: »I would really like to know what you think about this area?
Sometimes meds are critically necessary. Sometimes meds can take the edge off so that we can be able to learn and apply other skills so that we don't need meds long term. Each case is different.
0 -
Dear allenpriest and others,
Of course meds may be critically necessary and even essential for well-being and to throw the baby out with the bath water is ill-advised and may even be dangerous. I am just concerned that we invest more time and attention on the many factors which contribute to our mental health including the social aspects of our lives because how we inevitably cope and manage our thoughts, feelings, responses and choices will likely determine how we impact our lives and the people in them. How we think about ourselves, our problems, and more importantly our range of choices and solutions may link directly to what we decide to do. I am so impressed with the contributions people are making to our thread. This suggests to me that we are capable of moving our minds to highly constructive, healthy levels of functioning which has to bode well for our well-being and success. Life is difficult. Yet, we accept the difficulties, face the pain, and problem-solve. That is the deal. I wish someone could wave the magic wand and make it easier. At the same time, maybe it is the journey itself and the pain we feel, that we learn what we most need to understand. Sounds very "Zen" but it is what I think
Have good sleeps everyone
S
1 -
allenpriest wrote: »shelleygold wrote: »I would really like to know what you think about this area?
Sometimes meds are critically necessary. Sometimes meds can take the edge off so that we can be able to learn and apply other skills so that we don't need meds long term. Each case is different.
Amen to this, allenpriest!
I would love to forgo big pharma. I've tried, with bad results. Each case is different, and frankly, each rise and fall of my own depression is also different. Without being able to exercise, the drug that worked so well in July is no longer working. Sigh, back to the proverbial drawing board. Could I try again to just stop taking pharma drugs and see what happens? I could, but I really don't want my children visiting me in a mental hospital. I'm not being dramatic. There are so many levels and severities of this "issue" we call depression........ Not wanting to be alive anymore just feels like an illness to me. It is not normal to want to die. Maybe I use the term "illness" as a crutch. I will never kill myself. Never. As much as I would like to. I tell myself it is the illness that wants to die, not me. That, and not wanting to give my children the legacy of a mother who left them through suicide....... Keep me alive. (On my darkest of days)0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 393.4K Introduce Yourself
- 43.8K Getting Started
- 260.2K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.9K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.5K Fitness and Exercise
- 426 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.5K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 153K Motivation and Support
- 8K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.7K MyFitnessPal Information
- 24 News and Announcements
- 1.1K Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.6K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions