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We broke up because...
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She didn't like my costumes0
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had a weird phobia of bed sheets0
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The leash was bad enough, but when she showed me the ankle & wrist cuffs & thick studded collar That was too much0
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He dint like restraints. Do I need to say more?0
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Tied my hands so tightly had to amputate0
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Was offended by my amputee fetish0
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She called me Stumpy0
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I found out that she was a suspect as a Serial Killer!0
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She would never let me have a turn controlling the remote. You can guess to which device I am referring to0
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Cause she has issues0
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she didn't like bacon0
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She was missing a few limbs - couldn't put her whole self into our relationship0
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She wanted to control the garage door opener. Wasted so much electricity0
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Frankly, it was the hairy butt0
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She didn't want to shave my butt0
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Hooked me up to a remote - I'm not into electroplay0
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He was afraid of my mom0
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talked too much about her mom0
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Had to push reset one too many times! ;p0
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He blew our entire grocery budget on meat for one meal.0
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