We broke up because...
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she hit me with a bat0
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she thought I said hit the balls! I said have a ball... have a ball!0
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she was hard of hearing0
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lol ouch
she was frigid0 -
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said she wasn't putting out until I put a ring on her finger.0
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told me the prince albert piercing wouldn't hurt0
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lol she thought the appropriate ending to a date was a fist bump0
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always had a "headache"0
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tried to give me aspirins shaped like blue diamonds0
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she got drunk and told me to grab my toes so she could show me where the wild goose goes
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Kept goosing me at church0
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she would get right beside my ear and crow like a rooster to wake me up0
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He was allllllways right. Felt like he made me eat crow all the time.0
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fed me actual crow for dinner. I wondered why she wasn't eating0
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Put rat poison in my coffee.0
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Didn't believe me when I said they were just sprinkles0
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Was always putting sprinkles all over...0
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Not into sprinkles0
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She moved north...0
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