We broke up because...
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She was always wanting to wax me!0
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I'd always hear "Wax on, wax off" behind the bathroom door!0
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Only to get rid of all the hair! Yuck
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He had strange pet names for his.....
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She would never pet me...0
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She had too many pet peeves!0
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She'd pet, pet, pet!!! What was wrong with her?0
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wouldn't let me caress her b- uh... beautiful eyes... yeah, those!0
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Drove me crazy by singing McHammer's Can't touch this every time I got close.0
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His wife didn't like us dating
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she didn't share her lasagna0
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She's always using metaphors!0
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His wife liked me more than he did!0
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Way too jealous0
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She had videos of her ex doing unspeakable things!
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Ran out of beer
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Was getting a pretty huge beer belly!0
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Wouldn't share the beer
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Drank Bud Lite0
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Was an alcohol snob0
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Didn't discriminate
If it had alcohol shed drink it!0 -
she poured out all my alcohol0
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He forgot ...he drank all the alcohol0
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She took my hat so I took her glasses.0
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Every time I tried to have a serious conversation with him he'd show me that Smirk!
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