We broke up because...

littlewolf3785

He was actually a beach bum

Nitroalley2

She wouldn't go skinny dipping

RunHardBeStrong

He told me I should go chunk dunking.

Nitroalley2

Ok I had to google that
She said my chunky did not have nuts

LonniJay

He didn't know the difference between creamy and chunky

Nitroalley2

She only took coffee black.

slimgirljo15

He..he.. ..it's too awful to speak of

Nitroalley2

She tried to show me her basement!
Noooooooooooooooooooooo!!

FabulousFantasticFifty

He always said no!

DasItMan91

She tried to tell me no

A_MariposaDream

All because I think it's fun for him to tie my shoes!!

LonniJay

She wouldn't put the lotion on skin

cburke8909

Restricted where I put lotion on her and where she put lotion on me. Some places just need that lotion.

iTim__

Said things like, "it puts the lotion on the skin." Too creepy for me.

cburke8909

Over cooked the favs beans and couldn't pick out a good Chianti if his life deepened on it. Oh and it did.

slimgirljo15

He never said why . .

cburke8909

Kept asking about why, should have been asking about what, when and how.

iTim__

Offered me suspicious drinks...

SojournerThirteen

Would eat or drink anything anyone gave him with no questions asked

slimgirljo15

His wife said he could do better

FabulousFantasticFifty

Shes always getting in brawls with th Wives of her Lovers

Dyl1789

always wanted to sell tickets to these brawls to make some money

littlewolf3785

He just wanted my money

FabulousFantasticFifty

She had no money

Dyl1789

her legs were to long for me

littlewolf3785

His legs werent long enough for the moves I wanted him in.

Abhi_131196

Size of legs was her only concern

LonniJay

Position of legs were too important to him

iTim__

She expected 360° flexibility in legs -- I'm not your Ken doll!

LonniJay

He wouldn't be the Ken to my Barbie