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We broke up because...
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She kept using strange words like posh.0
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He kept looking in the dictionary when we spoke, he's a beauty of a callipygian man but when I tried to compliment him, it looked like I had pulled out the futhark and he needed a translation of what I was trying to spell out.
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She tried to read the dictionary to me every night before I went to bed but I was just too tired to give a fuk0
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He was always too tired, a girl got needs too!0
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She "needed" me to be her Maid!0
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He demanded I clean his .... I refused!0
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She refused everything I did for her...
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He kept wearing my clothes1
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He messed up all the moves after that, was totally confused as to what his identity was.0
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He wanted know way more about his Ex than he did about me0
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Didn't like my inverted boobies0
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His outtie wasn't far enough out for me0
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He's right, his a.ss is so loose the strap on kept falling right out 0
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She was always talking dirty at Bible study!
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She taught bible study but read 50 shades of grey to the kids instead of the bible
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He spent my Pedicures money on his weave0
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Wouldn't shave my initials in his pubes0
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She used my leg razor on her ......
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He never grew pubes... It creeped me out0
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She was always talking about how much smoother her ex was!
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She kept licking my cheek 0
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He had a thing against tongues
His loss!
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I was ticklish around the rim
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Watch it now!
He was too involved in playing basketball and had no time for me!0 -
Her feet always hurt too much to do anything. Damn shoes!0
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I caught her dumping a bunch of my favorite shoes into the trash compacter0
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Wouldnt share her shoes0
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